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Behaviour/development

Procrastination in a nearly 4yo. I realise it's nothing new, I'm sure there are threads in the archives, but I want my own. It's driving me mad!

7 replies

hunkermunker · 15/01/2008 22:16

DS1 "just has to do

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welliemum · 15/01/2008 22:28

Aaaaarghh. Am watching this thread with interest.

Before we can leave the house to feed the chickens dd1 has to have a complete change of outfit including underwear, find her "handbag", load it with various important random objects, eat sandwich, do a wee, dress her "baby" and wave goodbye to the dog.

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juuule · 15/01/2008 22:34

Give him lots of warning about what you want hi to do.

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slng · 15/01/2008 22:43

ds1 does EXACTLY that. Admit to sometimes being driven up the wall... but usually leave plenty of time so we are not usually late for anything (warm glow of smugness. Touch wood - tomorrow we are probably going to be late for everything...) I try the following when I'm calm enough not to shout:

  1. "If you don't do this by the time I count to three I'm going to do " Usually works but he doesn't like it!


  1. Say "Bye" and actually leave house without him and wait outside door - usually works, but he really does panic so not to do unless VERY VERY urgent. Sometimes a mere threat of that would work.


  1. Dawdle A LOT when he asks me to do something, like "I'm just going to do this first" etc. He gets the message after a while and remembers (for the next couple of hours or more if reminded) not to dawdle.

This can be quite funny when you see how exasperated he becomes and then say now you know what it's like. He generally becomes quite shame-faced. For about two seconds.

  1. "If you do this quickly then we'll have time for a quick story/TV/whatever." This is the most painless way especially if you can build up to the story/TV/whatever.


I really must stop procrastinating and put that laundry away and go to bed ...
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hunkermunker · 15/01/2008 22:59

Hmm, might try the procrastinating with him. Actually, that may well be where he's learned it from in the first place (although I have been much more on the ball recently because there are places we HAVE to be).

I give loads of warnings, lots of explaining what the plan is for the morning, what he needs to do, what I'm doing - he does know the drill. But he just has to do x, y or z first!

He's also a master at ignoring me. I have discovered that tapping him on the shoulder repeatedly and going, "DS1, DS1, DS1, DS1, DS1" in a funny voice makes him laugh, then pay attention to me...for a brief second.

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candypandy · 15/01/2008 23:05

Have you come across "i just have to get my bag/shoes/whatever" only to find them playing/reading having totally forgotten they were being taken out and what they were planning to do

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hunkermunker · 17/01/2008 10:43

Aha! I have had massive recent success with, "Ooh, DS1, can you come here a minute, please? I just need to check how many feet you have."

It made him laugh and he came straight away to have them checked. I told him I thought there might be seven. I hope I'm not giving him some sort of centipede complex that haunts him for life

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welliemum · 17/01/2008 19:49

Am at work now, but I must do this with dd1.

We've had several foot-related Comparative Zoology conversations, eg "Snakes have got no feet, just chins", and (admiringly) "[the dog] has lots of feet" so this would be right up her street.

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