My 21 MO, otherwise very caring, has recently started biting and scratching at nursery. It started at nursery, and I think that is where the issue lies, but we are getting the guilt trip from the staff. Please help!
When DD bites it is often unprovoked, usually smaller kids, and done in full view of the staff. They react by telling her not to, but then cuddling her . The nursery is in a bad phase, with a lot of agency staff and have recently moved buildings, and I think that DD is doing it for attention because she has become less secure about the staff and has realised that if she bites, every adult in the room reacts... one cuddles the victim, one gets the compress, one talks to her.
We are being told she is doing it because she is tired and we should pick her up earlier. We work FT... DD is tired, it is true, but that is not what is causing the biting, and we think nursery are opting out of taking responsiblity for dealing with it.
They did not tell us it was happening for two months... and we think they are basically not doing the obvious thing - telling her off and time outing her or ignoring her (safely etc).
It is not a blame thing, but she is there most of the week, so they are the only ones who can really rein it in. Instead they say that it is really difficult not to cuddle her and that DD should see the child psychotherapist. Is it just me or is this a bit like over reacting and under acting on their part?
All advice would be great as there is a mountain of working mother guilt at the moment!
Thank you.
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Biting 21 MO, nursery are being too soft, please help! Long....
22 replies
lemur · 08/01/2008 21:56
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