*the* competitive thread

[SenoraPostrophe]

dd...is a one-girl card factory. I will never buy one again.

ds1...is the most paternal 3 yr old boy ever, looking after ds2 wherever he goes.

ds2...is ds2.

there. I've said it.

[Blandmum]

dd personally responsible for the denuding of the rain forests to create the paper for her endless projects.

ds capable of rending who areas of unsuspecting people speechless and gasping by the volume and pungency of his farts.

Beat that!

[weebleswobblemoreonboxingday]

hmmm ds1 could nag for England in the next Olympics, were it to beconme a sport.

ds2 can get through a note paper block making his own yugio(?sp) cards in 1 afteroon - coloured in too!

[SenoraPostrophe]

hehe. dd can do some good farts too, but she's never done that.

ds2 can fling his dummy several hundred metres when he thinks there is food around.

[BroccoliSpears]

However carefully and furtively you hide your keys, dd will find them in a flash and hit your child over the head with them before you have time to blink. It's a gift.

[QuintessentialShadow]

Ds2 is master in bumping down the stairs on his bottom shouting loudly as he does so. Especially at bedtime. He sometimes has a race with his brother, and always wins. I am trying to tell them to stop, but alas....

[weebleswobblemoreonboxingday]

Forgot to mention that ds1 is currently going for world record in how long you can go without washing your face.

[mistypeaks]

dd2 can find a piece of old food to eat hidden in a sofa crease/booster seat/skirting board. No matter how hard I try to clean she 'hides' titbits for later on!!!
dd1 can go from normal to tantrum in 0.05 seconds!!!

[Jacanne]

dd2 has the world record for the highest pitched screech when she doesn't get her own way. She also grinds her teeth louder than anyone else ever (it wakes me up at night).

[beowulf]

ds1 managed his first two word sentence in front of the HV at his two-year check.

Me: We know he's a bit behind with his speech, and he hasn't put two words together.
ds1: What's that?
HV: I think he just said "What's that?"
ds1: What's that? It's a star.

ds2 can scream louder than any living creature on earth

[StealthPolarBear]

DS can wrap me round his little finger
He has also been saying "mama" since about 2 months
In the style of "Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

[StealthPolarBear]

oh yes, he can sniff out electrical wires to chew at 100m

[ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands]

I've said it before.. and I'll probably say it again (because the rest of your little darlings just can't compete!!)..

DS2 (7 with SN) can paint the BEST ever mural on ANY wall using only shit!

I defy anybody else's child to do a better job with such rudimentary materials!!

[StealthPolarBear]

shiny that is one award i'm very happy not to compete for

[mishymoo]

yip shiny - you can have that award with pleasure!

My 2.4 DS can produce the biggest poo's in the world - big enough to sink any ship!

[ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands]

And my DS could paint with it! There.. we could team up Mishy!

[fullmoonfiend]

ds1 holds the world record for the most chocolate spread ever consumed by one individual.

ds2 can burp the first four letters of the alphabet.

[mishymoo]

I suspect it would cover the entire ground floor of any semi-detached!

[StealthPolarBear]

urgh
off to have some lunch!

[Kathyis6incheshigh]

DD holds the world record for saying 'Daddeeeee!' the most times in a car. She has done it non-stop all the way from Sheffield to Cambridge.

DS is the most gorgeousest baby in the world with the chubbiest ickle wickle leggies SO THERE!

[hazeyjane]

dd1(20 months) is the next Tracy Emin, and I'm grooming her for the Turner Prize. Using only 200 mega bloks,lots of half chewed board books, a 50 piece tea set (who has that many teddies round to tea!), several cuddly toys, some very old raisins found under sofa, a pot of glitter that should have been put on shelf out of reach,and her baby sister she has created a magnificent art installation.

dd2(6 months)is very good at sleeping in the middle of it all, looking lovely.

I am very good at ignoring the mess so that I can drink hot chocolate and type on Mumsnet.

[Sunshinemummy]

DS (20m) has the most chip-like toes and gives the biggest squeezes ever.

[Threadworm]

Tee Hee at this thread.

DS1 can spend longer in the shower than any of his peers and come out of it with dirtier hair.

[onebatmother]

DD has most glazed eyes when watching TV
DD has most adult sense of humour (under-3s) And winks after punchline

[TheDuchessOfNorksBride]

DD2 excels at swimming & finding treasure & knows all about whales and will undoubtedly be President of the Oceanographic Association.

DS1 can eat more pasta than the entire cast of The Sopranos.

DD2 is the whitest blonde with the bluest blue eyes. Ever.