Is there an age or stage I can look forward to leaving ds in a room on his own, with confidence?

[snotonmyshoulder]

Have been using a play pen successfully, but only for a few mins at a time - to go to loo, nip and fetch something etc. Now ds is 1 and walking he's less happy to be shut in. He's not climbing onto settee yet and sitting room is safe - do I leave him while I go upstairs? Desperate to fold laundry in peace

I wish it was safe upstairs but it's not and I have a thing about him associating being in his cot with sleep or naps only - am I silly? He's been happy to play in the sitting room when I'm in the kitchen, and can keep an eye, for a while now and he's not got into any trouble.

& what do I do when he can climb onto settee? He's great at getting off safely by himself and has never fallen when doing this, but even so I am worried - Am I trying to wrap in cotton wool?

Glad for any suggestions

[bossybritches]

Take your laundry down to the sitting room first thing or while he's asleep napping & then do it while he's playing under your eye or in his playpen /high chair. Pegs used to be a great distraction for mine. I'd not leave him alone though, it only takes a second at that age & they're up & on to things!

[snotonmyshoulder]

Thanks bb, I thought it may be wishful thinking! Is there a stage to look forward to where this is possible? Nap time is precious as work 3 days a week and there's soooo many things to do! Tidying in general upstairs is getting a real headache!

Have to post and run for now but any further thoughts gladly appreciated x

[bossybritches]

have you a spare room that could be your laundry room for now? Would the playpen fit in there?
If he was happily playing in it you could do laundry & be wandering in & out tidying.Keep talking to him when out of sight commenting on absolutely anything so he can hear your voice. It's amazing what games you can play while doing stuff as well.Keep ot short so ghe doesn't resent time in confinement! OK it might get done more slowly but set yourself little tasks that are achievable & write them down. it's very satisfying to cross them off as you go. ie if the chest of drawers needs clearingout of his clothes set yourself the target of one drawer per day.

Best of all just let the housework go a little & just enjoy his company he'll soon be a grunting teenager believe me!

[snotonmyshoulder]

Thank you that makes me feel so much better! It's given me much to think about and it's great to have another mums point of view - have lost touch with mums in my area since going back to work, so I guess I just get a bit fraught sometimes, thinking everyones got it much more sussed than me!

I guess the days of being able to get on with something, with lo merrily entertaining self in another room are far far off in the distance!!

I don't know what I was thinking really

Here's to a messy upstairs!

[bossybritches]

It will come snotty it just seems interminable at the time!

[nappyaddict]

i've always left my ds from being a newborn to now and he's 15 months. he can't yet climb on the sofa, but he can get off it safely so when he does that won't concern me.

we've just had to move all the cleaning stuff into a top cupboard because he's taken to liking to play with the pink vanish bottle

before he was safe going up and down the stairs i used to shut the hall door so he had the run of the whole of the downstairs and then he didn't seem to mind. if i just shut him in his playroom then he would scream like mad.

[PoshCod]

was htining baout how horrendous that is as i put wahsiong away last night

[nappyaddict]

saying that the other day i left him on the sofa and heard him crying so i went down to see what the matter was and he was only dangling mid air holding onto the window handle!! we hadn't got a baby monitor but i've borrowed one off my friend cos i can't hear him downstairs if i'm upstairs and i like to be able to hear if he's getting up to mischief.

[sarah573]

I think leaving them for short period of time encourages independance. If you take them everywhere in the house with you they will still be following you around at 5.

It goes without saying that you need to make sure all the areas they have access to are safe. If your LO is not confident on the stairs put a gate at the bottom and the top.

If you want to go fold your washing and your DS is playing happily in the front room, then I can't see any reason not to leave him there. I've certinally done this will all 3 of mine. So long as you are in earshot he will soon yell if he wants you.

Ps - as toddlers mine have taken several tumbles from sofas and come to no harm at all. Its great practice for the tumbles they will take from climbing frames, scooters, pushbikes, playgyms etc etc.

[BadZelda]

Hi there - my LO is nearly 3. She is starting to get into playing in her room with the radio on (cbeebies radio streamed from the web)? To reduce mess, I put everything away and just leave out a 2 or 3 'activities' - e.g. blocks, books and a few cars.

[snotonmyshoulder]

Thank you all for your views - I did expect there would be different takes on this - I guess it's a personal decision depending on how you would feel if a tumble did happen that caused an injury - may be I have an unhealthy fear of being asked "and where were you when the accident happened??

But I kind of agree with you Sarah573 about encouraging independence and also you can't be there to cushion every fall forever, how do they learn otherwise? Hence my "am I wrapping DS in cotton wool".

My feeling is I should monitor how close he is to climbing up on the sofa himself, and when I feel confident that he can handle himself, perhaps a few scatter cushions strategically placed wouldn't go amiss.....

[Anna8888]

I childproofed our flat (where I moved when my daughter was 11 months) and she has also had freedom of movement, except for the kitchen (I just shut the door) when she was at a silly stage when she kept climbing on the table.

She generally stays near me, either in the front part of the flat (hall/sitting room/dining room/kitchen/laundry room) or the back part (bedrooms and bathrooms). She doesn't like being on her own except sometimes in her own bedroom playing quietly with her toys. I can always hear her (creaky floorboards) so know what she's up to.

[nappyaddict]

that's what i've started to do ever since the dangling incident.