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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

Did anyone's baby not coo/stop cooing for over a month & everything be ok?

202 replies

Kmxxx14 · 07/01/2017 10:14

I posted about my DD and how she stopped cooing at 10 weeks. Everyone reassured me it was normal she was just learning something new.

She's 16 weeks on Monday & still no cooing. Did this happen to anyone else?

OP posts:

Report

29redshoes · 07/01/2017 10:18

I can't remember the exact weeks but yes my DD was making lots of noises then suddenly went quiet for a couple of months. We were very and then one day she started again. She's eight months now and still has some days where she's very "chatty" and some days where she doesn't "say" much at all.

Reality16 · 07/01/2017 10:24

Coo?

Kmxxx14 · 07/01/2017 10:26

Thank you.

I'm beside myself with worry jumping to conclusions it's not doing me any good.

I've been to the GP and she's been referred to a specialist but I just need to calm my mind and hearing others stories helps.

OP posts:

Kmxxx14 · 07/01/2017 10:26

Coo - when I talked to her she would "talk" back. Making vowel noises.

OP posts:

Justme3 · 07/01/2017 18:55

Our DD stopped as you say.
They do just stop and try to learn new things. Ours stopped until she could roll

Kmxxx14 · 07/01/2017 19:49

Wow. Really that's so interesting. I'm hoping she'll start up again soon. She started to shuffle her bum when lying down whereas before she lay totally still. So I'm hoping that may be a good sign.

She has also started shouting out lots where as before she would just be silent. I'm hoping that's a good sign too.

OP posts:

Tootsieglitterballs · 07/01/2017 20:08

I remember being told that when they are young and they are trying to learn something new, they put all their effort into that, and can stop doing what they were doing before as they put all their focus into the new 'trick'

Justme3 · 07/01/2017 21:35

Honestly don't worry; just try to enjoy these early days. It goes so so fast

Kmxxx14 · 07/01/2017 21:47

Thank you. I know I'm trying to but I'm really not. I'm really not coping well at all. I'm not sure what I can do or how to snap out of this. I keep breaking down in tears. I feel I know in my heart something is wrong but I'm gripping onto hope to get me through. Then I'll just look at her and talk to her and she'll blank me or look away or avoid eye contact and I'll just break down.

I can't eat or sleep or function properly. And I know there's a possibility she's fine but I also know from the signs she's giving me that there's a possibility she's not. And I'm just not strong enough to cope with that. I'm really honestly not.

OP posts:

Binglesplodge · 08/01/2017 01:12

OP, I don't have any wisdom on cooing but I did just want to ask if you feel OK yourself? Is there any chance you may be experiencing some post-natal anxiety? I don't mean to offend you, I just recognise some of what you're saying from my own experiences when my son was a baby.

If you're at all concerned about your own anxiety levels, do pop to your GP for a chat. I don't mean to undermine your concerns about your baby, I just want to make sure you're looking after yourself too.

MiniMaxi · 08/01/2017 01:23

Very similar here and he just started again about a month after stopping. Seems to be something to do with developmental leap at 12 weeks - according to the Wonder Weeks it's common for babies to stop making previous sounds while they master something else / new sounds. Hope all is ok.

Kmxxx14 · 08/01/2017 03:40

I am incredibly anxious so I may visit the GP - thanks for the suggestion, no offence taken. I feel like there is something wrong in the bottom of my heart though so I guess I feel my anxiety is justified. I just don't know why both the HV and GP seemed so concerned if it was considered "normal".

OP posts:

CakesRUs · 08/01/2017 04:51

Hi op, you says she's been referred to a specialist?

Kmxxx14 · 08/01/2017 05:51

Yeh the GP said he would refer her to a doctor that specialises in child development.

OP posts:

AmberEars · 08/01/2017 08:05

OP, you sound so stressed. I hope the specialist can set your mind at ease.

Kmxxx14 · 08/01/2017 08:20

Thank you.

She has woken this morning totally avoiding all eye contact. When I try to look at her she moves her head the other way over and over again so there's no way I can look at her.

Finding it difficult to bond with her if I'm honest. No noises back. No looking at me. She seems to just want to either be held over my shoulder or laying on the ground.

OP posts:

Kmxxx14 · 08/01/2017 08:32

They tell me the best thing to do is keep interacting with her but whenever I do she seems really annoyed and frustrated and cries until I stop.

OP posts:

HeddaGabbler · 08/01/2017 08:35

Op you sound depressed. Get to the GP and tell them how you feel. I'm sure there's nothing wrong with your baby; my little boy never cooed and he's 19 months now and starting to talk and is normal in every way. Hope that maybe helps? Anyway pleads go and get help.

AmberEars · 08/01/2017 08:39

I agree your baby sounds normal for 16 weeks. This is a tough time for you, OP.

Kmxxx14 · 08/01/2017 08:43

Really? Everywhere I read it says it's not normal and a red flag for autism. When I spoke to the HV she said it wasn't normal and to go to GP. When I seen GP she couldn't believe that she had just stopped making noises. It obviously made me very worried.

If I go to GP about my own anxiety then what can they do?

OP posts:

AmberEars · 08/01/2017 08:52

The trouble is that lots of things can be a marker for autism, e.g. a 1yo arranging things in lines or a 2yo needing to do things in a certain order. But they can also be normal behaviour for a NT baby / toddler, unless lots of the signs are present.

You just can't tell at 16 weeks. And you say she's shouting out lots, so she's still making noises, just different ones?

AntiQuitty · 08/01/2017 08:54

I have a ds with autism, though with a different development path. One of the worst things when I knew something wasn't right was people telling me it was okay when I knew things weren't, that he was different. I knew and know people were doing it to be kind but it didn't feel kind, it felt like they were wilfully refusing to hear me, dismissing me and were unsupportive.

You are on a scary and unknown path and it comes with a lot of fear and anxiety. Maybe the doctor can help with that. I probably should've had anti depressents or something myself to get through a very rough couple of years. I became very low.

I would also post on the special needs children board to see if anyone there has a similar experience of a small baby.

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littledinaco · 08/01/2017 09:56

I just came on to say the same as AntiQuitty-I have a DD with a disability and I just knew something was wrong very early on. It was horrible getting dismissed and people constantly telling me 'they are all different' and she was normal, etc.

Your DD is very lucky to have you looking out for her this early as early intervention can make a massive difference. If it does turn out that there is nothing wrong then you won't have lost anything but well done for being proactive and getting a referral.

Kmxxx14 · 08/01/2017 10:18

Thank you. Is there anything I could be doing at home to help her? What is the intervention they do?

OP posts:

Justme3 · 08/01/2017 13:48

Honestly from your descriptions i think your baby is normal. I'm a special needs teacher and although it's possible (anything possible!) It wouldn't be usual to notice ASD signs this early. Babies don't always make eye contact at this age.

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