The terrible twos really are shit, aren't they

[OhPuddleducks]

DS (my second child so I should bloody be used to this) is SO SO SO 2 right now. He's doing my head in. He's so contrary it's untrue and is a terrible sleeper (both going to bed and sleeping through), eats like a Neanderthal (when he isn't chucking it on the floor declaring "I don't like this". Really? REALLY? It's all you would eat last week), knows when he is weeing or pooing but GOD FORBID we suggest he use the potty. I'm not really looking for advice. Just company in my misery. Anyone else counting down to their kid's 3rd birthday?

[KP86]

Oh my god, yes.

My 2.3yo is doing his best to kill me right now. Soooo hard to entertain and when he isn't happy he gets destructive. And the tantrums when he is told no. And the total lack of eating. Waking up at 5am every day.

Can we send them to nursery 24/7?

[OhPuddleducks]

Sometimes I wish we could! He's an angel at nursery (allegedly). At home he mainly talks in Pterodactyl shrieks. I'm sure the neighbours think I'm a terrible mum from all the thumping and clumping and wailing and screaming he does. His latest thing is kicking the (hollow) wall between his room and the bathroom in rage when it is bedtime to the point where our shower rail fell down. I'm honestly don't know what to do with him. Please hurry up 3!

[MamaDuckling]

It's So Awful

[MamaDuckling]

Will 3 actually be any better???

[OhPuddleducks]

It was with my first. DP has just been reminding me that around this time with DD I was wailing "what have I done to my lovely happy little baby?!" And that by 3 she was back again. And also, If he's like this at 3, I might give him to the circus.

[OhPuddleducks]

*DS to the circus. Not DP.

[MamaDuckling]

Mine is testing me to the limit, ten times a day..... Can't make up his mind on anything, whinges from 5am-7pm, hits me, yells, throws toys..... We are in a particularly rough patch I think as daddy is away for work, but still, it's AWFUL!

[OhPuddleducks]

Oh the hitting. The hitting is awful. That's a new one for us as DD wasn't a hitter. Someone once told me that boys get surges in testosterone and that it can make them angry balls of fury (pardon the pun). Mine definitely looks like a mini-non-green hulk when he gets going. Shall we pretend it's that and might even whisper be over before 3? Maybe.......

[MamaDuckling]

I call my DS's rage Red Mist..... It literally takes hold, his whole face and body change. It's like Jeckylk and Hyde!

[Ellasshitholekitchen]

Oh my 2.5 year old has just got up after two hours sleep, she is now pushing dolls around the landing in toy buggy, Christ only knows when she might go back to bed. I'm too hot and tired to get stressed out. She's now telling me " it's morning!" If I didn't have wine I would cry!

[TheUnsullied]

Another 2.3 here. And if things aren't done precisely how she wants them, a tantrum follows. And I'm far too stubborn to let her dictate everything, so there are a lot of tantrums. This is particularly fun because everyone else who looks after her thinks she's an angel. Though DM probably only thinks that because she gives in to all the demands for cake, ice cream, etc, so that tantrums don't happen.

[Dairybanrion]

Hahaha.
Lolling at pterodactyl shrieks.
Mine is just about....just coming around at nearly 4.
Everything you wrote we have here.
Plus.... He loves hulk and pterodactyls.

[SpaghettiMeatballs]

I DON'T LIKE IT is the most over used phrase in this house too. I have a 4 year old too so like you OP I should have been better prepared.

[Itsaplayonwords]

Thank god it's not just me. My daughter had a personality transplant a few weeks ago when the novelty of having a little sister wore off. Today she had a meltdown because we were getting in the car to go to the park (she had been asking to go all morning) eventually she said she didn't want to go to the park so we went back inside. Five minutes later she had a meltdown because she wanted to go to the park.

[hilbil21]

I'm taking my son to Florida next year at 2.5 years old... I see a disaster waiting to happen

[Dodooodoo]

2.8 year old here and I've had enough too. We're 4 months away from 3 and I distinctly remember saying "just 11/10/9/8 months until we get to 3!" Except she's not changing at all. Cries in shops and lays down on the floor kicking her legs. Screams at everything. Fights with her brother (4) and sister (8). Blames naughty things on her brother and sister! I mean she will do something naughty like write on the wall and then immediately say "A did it" or "B did it" with the best poker face.
Oh and she runs off in shops with no fear at all.

My ds was a bit like this but changed gradually towards 3 years. This girl is just something else. And my dd1 was and still is an angel bless her. She had no terrible twos!

[KP86]

"No." is indeed a complete sentence. DS tries it out on me 50+ times a day. Even when he does want the thing you're offering!

And the "Mummy, come look" and constant talking all day long. Argh!

[ipswichwitch]

Our 4yo lulled us into a false sense of security. He never hit, bit, kicked, only had about 5 tantrums ever.

2yo however, is like a mini dictator. He is so contrary - will scream "I don't like it!" while continuing to eat whatever it is he apparently doesn't like. He will scream blue murder at every nappy change, but will he have a go at using the potty? Will he shite. i don't think there's enough gin in the world to keep me going til he's 5.

[Itsaplayonwords]

Our current favourite is "what is it Mummy?" about every bloody thing. It's a table, it's a chair, it's another chair, it's the table again.

We also quite like "No Mummy" whilst pushing me away. When I say "like" I actually mean "hate with every fibre of our being".

[YellowShockedFace]

Can I join this please? I thought I was going crazy today but now I know it's my 2 year old fault

[Trinpy]

I'm always slightly shocked when my 2 year old says yes to anything. It just sounds so weird and unnatural coming from him.

One of Dh's colleagues told him that if you give them 2 options to choose between then it let's them feel in control. Ha! Tried it with ds and he wants both options. But also neither. But also the third option he just made up which is completely impossible to achieve.

[Itsaplayonwords]

Seeing all of your mentions of gin and wine is adding to my misery. Every time I worry that breastfeeding isn't working I console myself that if I stop then at least I'll be able to drink wine.

[ipswichwitch]

Yes Trinpy, we tried the two options thing. He hates nappies so we asked him "do you want a nappy or to do a wee in the potty?" He wants neither option. Or just to crap on the carpet.

[wobblywonderwoman]

I have a 2.9 year old and a nearly two year old

I'm so tired

[SimplyNigella]

I have found my people.

DS is 2.6 and either (very occasionally) amazingly sweet and charming or (mostly) a tiny ball of hell fire rage. He literally vibrates with anger when he doesn't get his own way, especially when he has asked for something impossible.

I am often found to be muttering about a gap in the market for boarding school for toddlers.