I have 2 boys who live with me and their gentle father in a stable family home. I don't smack, don't allow tv in the bedroom, only allow age appropriate content and limit screen time generally. I breastfed both each for 2 years and carried them around in a sling.
I guess I am expecting to be judged so thought I'd get that stuff out of the way first! Not that I'm perfect (not by a long way) but I do try...
My older child is a peaceloving 9 yr old who loves nature and reading. My 7 yr old is quite different. He is Herculean in his build, immensely strong and tall for his age, and he loves to wrestle! At school his behaviour is impeccable and I am told that he is gentle, caring and patient with his peers and with younger children. I have seen this side of him in action when playing with his little cousins and I often feel very proud of him.
However... at home we find him to be dominating, inflexible and demanding. He has a very volatile temper which he seems unable to control. I guess that, at the root of it, he feels very strong emotions which he cannot handle. Anyway, I try to keep to a routine as much as possible, to avoid unnecessary battles. But you can't avoid them all.
And when I do say no to him, or his brother inadvertently irritates him he often pushes, hits, kicks us etc. But I wil not give in. When he completely loses it his body is taken over by anger. He is hot and red like a volcano. I follow this up with consequences and discussion.It makes no difference. Often the consequences fuel yet more rage.
He has always had these tantrums, but lately I feel something darker has crept in. He has overtaken his older brother in strength. I am worried that soon he will overtake mine too and we will eventually find ourselves living in fear of him. And that, in the future, he will repeat this behaviour with his own family.
I think we need outside help, partly because it is so hard to stay calm and logical when you feel under attack, but I am not sure who to approach. It seems a shame to involve his school, where he is thought of so highly. I would welcome suggestions...
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Behaviour/development
Should I get professional help? Violent 7 yr old.
34 replies
lilithxx16 · 07/02/2016 22:21
OP posts:
0dfod ·
08/02/2016 08:51
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