help-pooing preschooler

(4 Posts)
Fannycraddock79 Thu 04-Feb-16 16:25:28

I have just been to pick up almost 4 year old preschooler (dc has been there since sept 2014, is happy, loves the teachers, no problems leaving him, happy to be picked up, has friends to play with etc etc). Teacher pulls me aside and said he had pooed on the floor behind the toilet and that he had done it twice last week (they weren't sure who had done it but now assume it was him).

Now dc has been toilet trained since August 2012 with no problems since. Although last week I discovered he has weed on the floor in his playroom (into a little box) and then tried to poo on the carpet upstairs.

What am I doing wrong? It's not a mistake, it's deliberate as he was pleased he had done it.

Background is we have a 6 month dc also, no jealousy issues, he gets equal attention and even said this morning (to baby) "you're my best friend".

PeopleOnTheEdgeOfTheNight Thu 04-Feb-16 18:23:40

Hi, it could be something that happens a couple of times over a couple of weeks then stops on its own. E.g. a child was caught short , soiled their pants and it fell out in the floor. The child reacts in a child-like way, hiding it or whatever. It can also be about control, I.e. if children feel a lack of control over one area of their life they exert control over what enters or leaves their body (what they eat , where / when they pee or poo).

You might find it useful to read about encopresis.

I used to know a child psychologist who referred to herself as "the jobby doctor". I believe that in some cases, adults would over-react to things and create bigger issues around toileting.

Best wishes.

Fannycraddock79 Thu 04-Feb-16 21:11:47

Thankyou for responding, I don't think he's holding anything in, he goes 2-3 times a day and always has done. What came to mind when I caught him was that he was experimenting to see what happened.

At first he said it was him, then he blamed it on another child at preschool, but did admit he did it today. I'm wondering if another child did it last week and it has intrigued him and he has been testing it out.

I asked him today if he was worried or sad and he said no and I tell him everyday how much I love him so can't see that it's attention but I'm not a psychologist so am wondering if I'm missing anything.

If I google, it just comes up with american sites where they basically say make him clean it all up but not really why he's doing it.

PeopleOnTheEdgeOfTheNight Thu 04-Feb-16 23:28:32

I'd tend to think it's 4yo stuff, experimenting, testing boundaries etc, if it's such a recent thing.

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