Why is he horrible to me?

[Tulipancito]

Hi, my 2.5 is "good as gold" (to quote his childminder) until I put him in the car after work. Then he starts winging, shouting, asking me to go away, saying he wants to go back to the childminder's.
I work 4 days per week but still spend with him lots of time in the mornings, evenings, whole day on Fridays and weekends. I do think I'm a caring mother and dont think Im doing anything wrong but this is causing me serious anxiety symptoms.

He finishes his plate everywhere but wont eat anything at home. Everything seems to be a problem: getting in the bath, getting out of the bath, going to bed, getting out of bed. It really just seems that he wants to give me a hard time.

Whats wrong with him? Why do they do that? Is it because he loves me most? Or is he punishing me for not being there all the time?
Help please xx

[Lovelydiscusfish]

That sounds so hard - you shouldn't blame yourself. Is he like it at weekends too, or just when you pick him up? I ask because my generally very laid back dd (2.6) can be quite defiant on occasion with me after a full day at nursery - I put it down to over-tiredness, to be honest. The other day she even told me she hated me! That was pretty shocking, and not something she would ever normally say.
She says she enjoys nursery, doesn't mind going, though she says she prefers being at home, but I honestly think it is tiredness that leads to the challenging behaviour,

[Iggly]

Sounds normal to me. He's on his best behaviour for the cm but is relaxing and letting it all out for you. Because you're his mum!