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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

What do you do when child cries wolf?

15 replies

Ladymai · 28/09/2006 19:30

Have 21mth old DS who has always been a pain with food but has now started saying he doesn't want something, I take it away, then he throws a wobbler, I give it back to keep the peace and then it starts all over again. We've just spent 50mins at dinner with him f**king about with pudding for half an hour, I don't want it, yes I do, no I don't..... In the end I took it away and slung it in the bin and he bawled his eyes out.

What does everyone else do? Something tells me I should just say enough is enough and take it away at the first time he does it and then maybe he'll learn, but when he's hardly eaten anything and I can get a few more spoonfuls in I find it very difficult to do.

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/09/2006 19:32

this house is "3 strikes and you're out"...ie you get three chances of dinner being taken away - and then it's in the bin - they won't go hungry......

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Ladymai · 28/09/2006 19:36

I know he wont go hungry, but he's just sat there and munched his way through an apple while dads been sitting with him. Is it me or do children only take the piss with their mums!

Will try the 3 strikes though, got to be worth trying if nothing else to save my sanity!

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HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/09/2006 19:43

NO NO NO NO - don't give in and give him something else - if he doesn't eat his dinner - he gets nothing else!

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albatros · 28/09/2006 19:45

2nd HRH 3 strikes and nothing before the next meal sounds mean but it works
Good luck

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sugarfree · 28/09/2006 19:48

I think HRH is being extremely patient with 3 strikes.In our house it's one chance and away it goes,and no,there is NOTHING else til the next meal.
Do I look like a Little Chef or something?

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Ladymai · 28/09/2006 19:51

I know I know I know, I shouldn't give him anything else, however we've just got him eating apples again and I didn't think it would hurt! I'm too soft I know but after months of not eating fruit for him to eat apples again is a bit of a result!

I will be strong, I will not cave in.....

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sugarfree · 28/09/2006 19:53

It's hard when they are so little and cute,I know,but he would have eaten the apple tomorrow or the next day or whenever you know.
Who's the Mummy???

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Ladymai · 28/09/2006 20:03

Sugarfree, you're probably right. He did have one this afternoon too. Think its probably a phase/novelty thing and no doubt wear off in a few days! I just can't bear the thought of him going to bed hungry though!

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sugarfree · 28/09/2006 20:16

Well,do the three warnings thing rather than my fierce version then.Honestly he does need to learn that when you say something,you and(his dad) really mean it.Otherwise he is going to run rings round you.
Good luck,be strong,don't give into tears (or worse,the quivery lip/puppy dog eyes thing)

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aviatrix · 28/09/2006 20:53

This reply has been deleted

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Ladymai · 29/09/2006 19:52

Aviatrix - He's always been a fussy eater, worse when teething or has a cold, however this is a new game he's playing. If he doesn't want his actual dinner he puts the bowl on the table with his spoon in it, which is fine, it sits there until we're finished. Its when I know he wants something and he'll start eating it, then wants me to take it away, then he wants it back, and so it goes on, but for some reason this only happens with me not dad or granny (if he's staying there for a night).

He doesn't piss me off but I'm sure he's taking the piss outta me!

Sugarfree - I will try the 3 strikes, DH did it tonight and it worked, but I might turn it into 2 strikes with me as he does already run rings round me in many other ways, so if I can nip this one in the bud sooner rather than later then my life will be so much better!!!

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sugarfree · 29/09/2006 20:16

Well done Mr Ladymai!
You can do it!

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sandcastles · 30/09/2006 13:09

""I'm too soft I know "" That's why kids take the p*ss. Your ds is being told that it's ok to throw a wobbler, cause he will get what he wants...

Am with QoQ here, but we only have 1 chance, if it comes off the mat, it wil only go back once, next time bin, nowt else til next meal.

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bambi06 · 30/09/2006 13:14

a little boy i look after ,similar age eats very well for me and knows the rules a;ready..you mess around with your food it gets taken away as obviously not hungry, so all isay is..ok your not hungry ,time to get down and have tea later..no questions asked whereas apparently with his parents hes playing them around saying no and thn wanting it and then not..you get the picture? it just goes to show how theyplay their parents up and all the kids ive ever looked after have eaten really well and only healthy food..no junk..but my kids..hmmm!!

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Ladymai · 30/09/2006 17:38

Bambi - that makes me feel so much better and you are so right because he eats fine when he goes to his grans and I'm not there.

I don't cave in everytime he cries, he certainly gets no alternative dinners. My way of thinking is if he tries some then he gets pudding or fruit, if he doesn't try it he gets nothing. Its the playing around that gets me, the yes I do, the no I don't, ha ha ha lets have a laugh at mum!

Sandcastles - by no means does he get his way by throwing a wobbler all the time, believe me we've had some tantrums here that I've stuck to my guns about, its the teasing and indecisiveness that gets me.

Sugarfree - thanks for the vote of confidence!