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Behaviour/development

13 week old addicted to her dummy - too young to go cold turkey?

11 replies

Bakewell · 26/09/2006 12:21

Hi there
All the dummy threads have been really helpful, but my 2nd is a real sucky baby and needed the dummy to get herself off to sleep. Despite good intentions of 'removing it before she falls asleep' she now has it through the night and whilst this restored some peace to our house (she has only had it for the last 6 weeks) she has just started to wake almost hourly during the night as it falls out of her mouth, and i'm now exhausted.
Definately becoming a big problem but HV says she is too young to go through the 'trauma' of having it removed. Can anyone suggest how I take it away?
Thank you!

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YellowFeathers · 26/09/2006 12:29

I remember this very well.
DD was so wriggly and would knock it out of her mouth and then we'd have screams so I ended up swaddling her to stop it happening.
I know its hard but I would say just go with it for now. It will stop.

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glamourbadger · 26/09/2006 16:56

Both my twins were v sucky babies and we had exactly the same problem at 13 weeks. They caught a cold around week 10 and I let them fall asleep with dummies as they struggled to settle. Fine to start with then they became completely dependent on them - the dummy started to fall out, they would both scream until I dutifully ran up the stairs (for the 100th time) to put it back in. It started to effect their daytime sleep and soon they were waking in the night looking for it!

Decided to bite the bullet and go cold turkey - and I have to say it's the best decision I've made. First night was hell (they screamed for over an hour) and for the first two days spent most of their lunchtime sleep crying rather than sleeping. It took about a week and got easier each day until on Saturday night they went down without a peep - and have done ever since.

I say go for it - you might have a traumatic couple of days but if the result is a baby that learns to sleep without a dummy then surely it's worth it?

Good luck!

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Babyblue2 · 26/09/2006 22:08

Both my DD's were sucky babies. Both had dummy's but despite the fact they fell asleep with them they would wake up as soon as it fell out again. I went cold turkey with them both, at around 4 wks and 13 wks. It was hard for about 3-4 days, constant crying, eventually they found their thumbs instead.

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Bakewell · 27/09/2006 10:52

Think I'll have to try it, am recovering from another awful night. Little one woke 12.30am, 1.30am, 3am, 4.30am and 5.30am - each time needing the dummy...am exhausted and know I have to hit it on the head now.

I am thinking about getting a maternity nurse to come and help me on the 1st night - the agency we plan to use when I return to work has a troubleshooting service, if i dont have someone telling me to be strong I know i'll give in to her. I need a strict supernanny to strengthen my resolve! Have to convince the husband who sleeps through it all that its worth it..

x

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rebeka27 · 27/09/2006 11:52

I know this sounds like TERRIBLE parenting, but we put calpol on our dummy adicts thumb a few times. Now he sucks his thumb, he can always find it and you don't need to replace it! (I hope!)

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Babyblue2 · 27/09/2006 13:11

Heavy sleeping partners are great aren't they. Good luck

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glamourbadger · 27/09/2006 13:24

Bakewell - you poor thing, you must be exhausted!! You can't carry on like this, surely letting her cry it out for a few nights is preferable to this many night-time wakings?

Try and get your husband on side - you need the support for a few nights as it's hard work on your own.

Funny how we are programmed to respond to our baby's cry - it hits you somewhere really raw and is unbearable. We turned off the monitor and went to check on ours every 5 mins, then 10 mins, 20mins, etc. Makes you feel like world's most horrible mummy but really is worth it in the end. Our two settle for all their sleeps with no fuss - I never thought I would achieve this with twins.

Be strong, you can do this!!

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Mirage · 27/09/2006 22:09

My dd's were both sucky babies & I resorted to dummies with some trepidation,as I remember my friend saying she'd wished she'd never given her ds one,after getting up 50 times in 1 night to replace it.

Anyway,my hv said that it was best to get rid of the dummy before 16wks as at that age they are too young to remember it.I did as she suggested & dd1 hardly noticed,but dd2 gave me about 3 nights of grief before she forgot all about it.Both are fab sleepers now.

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josephjaidensmum · 01/10/2006 04:10

hi there my little one had a dummy too
life saver

took theem all away a 9 months and he didnt really notice it, was vty suprised how easy it was

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mamama · 01/10/2006 04:24

My ds took a dummy at about 3 months (colicky - NOTHING else worked). Several people told us not to worry and that their kids gave them up when they went onto solids, around 6 months.

Ds did give it up, entirely by himself, at about that age, finding his thumb instead. Will deal with thumbsucking another time...

Cold turkey sounds a bit harsh to me, but I know you have to do whatever keeps you sane, especially when you're so exhuasted. Good Luck!

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newmum36 · 03/10/2006 20:40

I have a 12 week old. We too used a dummy from 6 weeks to get him to sleep in the evening. I have now taken it away from him in the evening (he never had it after 10pm dream feed) for the last 3 weeks and as long as we wind down with him (cuddle in the dark with lullaby light) then he goes down well - and he's awake when he goes down but calm and sleepy. Sometimes he might cry for 5 mins or so once he goes down on the mattress (used to be hysterical I can assure you - nothing worked) but no more. He goes down fine also for a morning nap without it. Come lunchtime, if we're out and about in the buggy or in the car I don't give it. But, if we're at home and he's very fractious, I do (or if I'm in a cafe or something and he's screaming) - I'm hoping to take it away from him on these occasions too before 16 weeks - but honestly the night thing was much easier to deal with than I expected. I couldn't bear the "dummy monitoring" up and downstairs all evening, so went with the crying for a couple of nights which diminished markedly very quickly.
Good luck - be strong !

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