mummy needing advise and support

(5 Posts)
mommasuzi Tue 05-Aug-14 10:09:43

hello smile
this is my first time on this site but i feel the only place to run to is other mummys smile

my beautiful little boy is 21 months old and is currently being assessed for development problems, problem is they have no idea what is wrong. so thought i would let you all know and see if it relates to anyone else smile

he has reached and exceeded all his physical milestones, walking, running, climbing, picking up small objects etc, and he has always been very affectionate, loves his cuddles and kisses smile

timeline (or else this would be really long lol)
1yr 3 months
no eye contact
no communication at all apart from babbling
no asking for anything (no pointing, no reaching)
very bad frustration tantrums (hyperventilation, bursting blood vessels in face, unconsolable)
regressed into himself, no laughing, stopped babbling, wanted to be on his own.
no response to his name or any other sound (hearing is fine)
took him to health visitor, mild development delay, were told to put him in day care

after day care eye contact got alot better and his fustration calmed down, i taught him to reach for things he wanted which has helped.

we are now at 1yr 9 months and he;
doesnt point
doesnt show interest in new people
he babbles but no words
gets upset when he cant understand a situation
only understands a couple of things i say to him (literally 3 things lol)
cant mimic,
doesnt play with toys in a role play manner
doesnt do one on one play at all
would rather be by himself but still affectionate
obsessed with anything that spins, gets very upset if you take a spinning thing off him and spinning things calm him down if he is upset (loves to lie on the floor and roll a car in front of his eyes, will find a pram wheel or anything that spins in a 1 mile radius lol)

he does laugh alot, smile, get enjoyment from physical play, chase and peekaboo etc. looking at him you would think he is a normal healthy boy but its only when you look deeper you see the issues.

he is currently going through a development assessment but they are pretty sure he is going to be refered to specialists. i just want to know where we are heading, what we are looking at here so i can help him. hes my little man and my defences are down, i feel ok most days, one step at a time and all that but somedays i just want to cry, i feel like it is my fault some how, that im not a good enough mother or something. he is amazing and i wouldnt change him for the world, i just want life to be easier for him and want to know whats wrong. sorry for such a long chat, this has all been building up. hope your are all having a good day with your little angels. much love, susan xx

GooseyLoosey Tue 05-Aug-14 11:10:07

Hi - I have no advice to offer as have not been in your position but did not want your post to go unanswered.

I guess you know in your heart of hearts that you have nothing to feel guilty about and that your are doing your best for your son.

You might get more response to your post if you post it on the special needs boards as you might find more parents are familiar with the diagnostic process you find yourself going through.

Best of luck in getting to the bottom of any issues and accessing any support you need.

mommasuzi Tue 05-Aug-14 11:53:47

thanks gooseyloosey, ive posted it in the special needs, think i just havnt come to terms with the fact my son is most likely special needs yet sad thank you for your support, i guess as mummys we blame ourself as our babys are so perfect it cant possibly be them lol. i just want to know the direction we might be heading in so i can prepare myself. much love hun xx

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 05-Aug-14 18:42:41

Agree with Goosey, you have done nothing wrong. You have behaved like an extremely loving and caring Mum who has sought help and advice smile

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 05-Aug-14 22:13:28

That is truely shocking advice from your HV too. Next time she tries to palm you off I'd ask her to explain her reasons a little more clearly smile

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