Worried about my angel - what do you all think??

[wog]

DD is 20mnth and she has been acting differently for about a week - she is very whinney from the moment she gets up to the minute she goes to bed, she wants something one minute then doesnt want it, she cries for everything and keeps saying no, leave, no more. She just seems unhappy and I dont know what is causing it, these are some of the things that have happened

*She has some teeth coming through (teething has never bothered her before)

*She had her MMR 3 weeks ago

*She moved from the baby room to the toddler room 2 weeks ago but she settled into nursery without a problem and doesnt cry when I leave, she says bye bye and blows kisses but Im not really happy with her new room and Im scared that maybe the staff there are not bothering with her, just a few things have happened especially in the first week - they lost 2 of her cups then sent her home without her cardigan - I know these are silly things but the ratio in only 1 adult to 3 children and every day I collect her her nose is dirty, and I mean hard dirt all round it.

*She doesnt want to go for a nap in the afternoon anymore.

I feel terrible I am going to keep her off nursery tomorrow and Friday and see if her mood improves. I know it could also be her age and her "personality" coming through. But I'm really scared that I'm doing something wrong. I want my happy carefree little darling and I want to do what makes her happy, within reason though because I dont want her spoiled or cheeky.

[popsycal]

ds is 19 months (and hasn't had his MMR) and had a similar phase about a month ago - back molars for him

[mckenzie]

I really don't have anyhting profound to suggest wog but I'd just like to give you my sympathy.
My DS has been acting strangely recently, although in different ways to your DS, and it is worrying.
I think perhaps you should rely on your instincts for now. Is she failry articulate? Can she tell you if anything is bothering her?

[Evita]

It sounds as though you've located a few things that could be making your dd feel unhappy. And I think keeping her off nursery for a day or two is a good idea. At least that way you can see if she's unhappy with you and then rule out the nursery possibility. Incidentally, how do you know she's whiney when she's at nursery? Is it something they're telling you? My dd is almost 18 months and is having real problems with her molars coming through. She's not whiney, but v. clingy and doesn't want to be put down for a nap in the day, all of which is not like her at all. Is yours chewing her hands a lot more than usual? That's generally a sign isn't it? Dd's made her fingers quite raw with gnawing.

[elliott]

could it be related to not having her nap in the afternoon - my ds (27 months) gets miserable and whiney whenever he is overtired. The new nursery room will also be tiring her out too.

[Jimjams]

she's probably under the weather. Could be MMR (it's the right timespan), could be teeth or she could be sickening for something.

DS2 has been vile all week. He's been very snotty with a slight temp since yesterday. I'm convinced its chickenpox (doing the rounds) and keep checking for spots. None yet though.......

If you're not happy with the nursery keep a close eye and don't be scared to move her if you're not happy. Our first nursery was a disaster. Second - the loveliest place ever. The difference in care is huge. Although they do still lose coats (actually parents do- we all go with each others)

[misdee]

u seem to be good at identifying things that may be causing a problem, but also take into consideration her age. the nap thing may be a prob (does she nap at nursery?).

[deegward]

Wog, can't suggest anything new, just big hugs{} it will get better. Sometimes they are jsut like that. DS1 is 4 and has his 'moments', and ds2 all the time. Thinking of you

[aloha]

Sounds like she might be sickening for something. Don't panic. She might also simply be tired. That's exactly what my ds is like when he's tired. What happens when you put her into bed? My ds often says he doesn't want a nap, calls for me a couple of times, then drifts off into oblivion for two solid hours - and wakes up a different boy.

[handlemecarefully]

My dd wasn't quite herself for a while when she moved from the baby room to the toddler room at Day Nursery. She was insecure because she wasn't familiar with the staff. However a few weeks in they had developed a mutual love affair - the staff had got to know her and vice versa and she was much happier. So it could be 'the change' that is affecting your dd, and therefore hopefully this phase will be shortlived.

Btw I found fault with the staff in the toddler room whilst my dd was having this difficult settling in phase and started developing all sorts of misgivings about the Day Nursery (like you are currently), but my misgivings evaporated as soon as it became apparent that dd had settled. It was like my misgivings about the Day Nursery was some sort of displaced guilt feeling about dropping her off there when I knew she wasn't enjoying it - iykwim

[nutcracker]

I really don't understand why nursery staff do not/can not wipe the childs nose or give them a tissue to do so. My dd is always coming home with rock hard dry snot around her nose. They must litterally leave it all day.

Sorrywog, haven't really got any advice, just know how you feel about the snot thing.

[Clarinet60]

I don't know how long you've been at this nursery wog, but my first ds never settled at his nursery, although we tried him for over a year! That kind of environment just didn't suit him at that age. He settled into playgroup really well at 3, and has settled into school well now.
He couldn't tell me at the time, as he was only 18 months when he started, (well I suppose he tried to tell me by crying for a year!) but he just wasn't happy there, for no particular reason. The staff were nice and caring, but had a high turnover. Maybe that was the problem, for him. He still talks about not liking it now, at 4.5.