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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

My son is hearing voices

141 replies

OakLuz · 12/01/2014 23:28

Over the past 2 weeks my 8 year old son has been hearing voices and sounds in his "ears and head" he says the person who is speaking to him is a man and his name is Joseph, he cries none stop and says that he is scared. I have done my research on schizophrenia and it is very unlikely he has that, I have suggested we take a trip to the doctors but he doesn't want to go I just don't know what to do next, his behaviour is deteorating day by day, he no longer wants to eat because he thinks there is poison in the food etc. I will be grateful for any advice

Luz

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neolara · 12/01/2014 23:31

I'm sorry, but I really don't think you have a choice. You need to talk to a GP.

Must be very, very scary for your DS. I'm sorry he is going through this.

Gunznroses · 12/01/2014 23:32

How awful for you both, i didn't want to read and just go, please please seek medical advice asap, do you have any family members he is close to and trusts? Try and get their support in this to speak to your son together.

seasalt · 12/01/2014 23:35

The sounds could be caused by inner ear infection.

GimmeDaBoobehz · 12/01/2014 23:38

I would definitely go to a doctor.

whitsernam · 12/01/2014 23:41

I have experience of this, and I think if he's scared you can approach him from the viewpoint that the GP will be trying to help him stop the voice he's hearing. Also, at his age, you can force the issue of seeing the GP a lot easier than you can when he is older, so you cannot afford to wait it out. Your post has ME scared, as I know what happened with my own son, so I can imagine how the two of you feel. You are probably the only person on the planet your son will trust enough to be able to get him to help, so you may have to do it even though he does not think he wants it. Like so many other things in being a parent..... Stay strong for him.

LEMoncehadacatcalledSANTA · 12/01/2014 23:43

It could be so many things. Ear infection. Imagination ( still real and distressing for him) tinitus?

Definitely talk to your gp. Go on your own . Explain that he doesn't want to talk to dr about it. They will know how to proceed.

probably irrelevant but my dd is 8 and had full on conversations with herself. She tells me she is talking to her invisible friends. Freaks me out abit but she is not bothered by it and its apparently quite common. Whether she heats them I dont know.

Theres a website about voices cant remember what its called but it was v interesting.

Im sure its nothing to worry about but its distressing him so you should get it checked x

BillyBanter · 12/01/2014 23:45

Why doesn't he want to go to the doctor? I'd try to get him there. Saying it's something minor like the ear infection mentioned might make the prospect less scary.

In the meantime is there something you can do to get rid of Joseph or shield your DC from these voices in the way you might protect him from imaginary monsters in his room at night? Does the voice reflect your DC's fears or worries? Take what he's told you about what the voices say and vanquish him with a favourite cartoon character or toy? Make a talisman to hang up at the door to stop him coming in? That sort of thing?

OakLuz · 13/01/2014 00:00

I thank you all for your replies, he confided in my 15 year old daughter and she told me, when I asked him why he doesn't want to go to the doctors, he said he doesn't deserve to go there (he has very low self esteem and is very sensitive) we have taken him to therapy classes but he just won't open up. "Joseph" whispers, laughs and says horrible things to him, he won't tell us what he says and I don't want to force him as I don't want to upset him. He isn't currently sleeping alone at the moment, he is sharing my daughters room with her, everynight he has woke up in the middle of the night crying and shaking. I will keep him off school tomorrow again, and try and persuade him to let me take him to the doctors. I just hope this isn't anything too serious as it is already breaking my heart.

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Oblomov · 13/01/2014 00:06

Christ. How frightening, for you, and him.
He is already going, but won't open up? That's not good.
I really hope you get the support you need, be it through a good counsellor, psychiatrist, camhs, or whoever is appropriate.

BillyBanter · 13/01/2014 00:08

Maybe concentrate on the low self-esteem. Is there a particular reason for that? Did anything come out of the therapy sessions? Maybe a different therapist could tap into how he is feeling better?

A talisman to wear round his neck or something he maybe has an attachment to (I know it sounds silly) doesn't require him to open up, but could still 'protect' him and be on his side, a sort of angel on his shoulder to counteract Joseph? I'm wondering (and I'm not a psychiatrist so take with a pinch of salt) if, because he has low self-esteem his imaginary friend is a malign one... Lots of children have very real imaginary friends or hear voices, but they are friendly or naughty. A naughty IF lets the child do naughty things.

noblegiraffe · 13/01/2014 00:09

Can you swap with your daughter so that you sleep with him? Might be more reassuring to have you there.

Good luck with the GP,

BertieBowtiesAreCool · 13/01/2014 00:12

I would definitely see a GP. Go by yourself at first as if it is psychological there may be no physical examination a doctor can make and you may be able to get advice and possibly even a referral without him actually there.

Once you've seen the doctor whatever the GP suggests, you could tell DS that you're going to see a doctor who helped another little boy who heard a scary voice in his head and they helped the voice go away for the other boy. Or rather than one, this doctor has helped lots of children and he/she knows all about scary voices.

OakLuz · 13/01/2014 00:12

He attended 5 sessions and wouldn't say anything, so we put an end to it. We have been told that we need to encourage him and praise him, which we do but it does make him feel uncomfortable ( sorry for going off subject) he also has a belief that he isn't "the same" but he won't tell us what he means, he is a child who will never join in activites with his peers or other children, he'd rather sit and watch.

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BillyBanter · 13/01/2014 00:20

I've not read it but wonder if it might be worth reading Oliver James' Lovebombing book. I've seen it recommended on here. Maybe someone else is familiar with it.

Good idea from bertie too about the special voice doctor.

BillyBanter · 13/01/2014 00:20

What things does he like or get joy from?

Fairenuff · 13/01/2014 00:22

I have suggested we take a trip to the doctors but he doesn't want to go

This is one of those occasions where he doesn't get to refuse. As a parent it is your responsibility to get him the help he needs. Obviously this is why you are posting, but it's time to get tough and get some action.

What would you usually do when he refuses to do something you say? What are the usual consequences/sanctions?

Oblomov · 13/01/2014 00:27

Ds1(10) has Aspergers and tells me that he is not the same . He describes himself as wierd . One of the Aspergers books I was recommended helped with that, and now he likes the fact , and tells me that he has accepted and is comfortable with the fact that he is "wierd, geeky and a freak" .
Hope you get similar resolution.

OakLuz · 13/01/2014 00:31

Billy I don't think he gets joy from anything, he doesn't play with toys or games, he will sit on the sofa and watch whatever is on televison all day if you allow him to.
Fairenuff there is many things that I would like him to do with me and his siblings which he says he doesn't want to do, I usually just let him have his way which I need to stop because it is not fair on the others (my other 3 children) I guess we have all gotten use to him.

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BillyBanter · 13/01/2014 00:31

How did the original therapy come about? Through school or did you arrange it?

BillyBanter · 13/01/2014 00:32

Has he always been like this?

OakLuz · 13/01/2014 00:37

Me and my husband arranged it ourselves, and yes he has always been like this. We thought it would be something he would grow out of. But he hasn't my husband and eldest son have just choosen to ignore his behavior.

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MeMySonAndI · 13/01/2014 00:40

I agree with those who say you have to take him to the doctor, regardless of his not wanting to go.

I understand that you don't want to make him uncomfortable and that he is a very sensitive child, but as ithers have said, it is easier to get help at this age than later.

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Oblomov · 13/01/2014 00:44

What does school say? What is he like at school?
Does he have friends?
What do you relatives think?
He is clearly unhappy and this is clearly not normal, so you know you need to do 'something', right?

OakLuz · 13/01/2014 00:55

Oblomov, he is a very hard worker at school but there is cause for concern in how he is with his teacher and his peers he just won't interact, as for friends he doesn't have any which is upsetting, he does get invited to birthday parties but doesn't want to go, I speak to a lot of the mothers at the school he attends a few of them have suggested that we meet up on the weekend and take our children out. My relatives and his god parents just see him as quiet. I wouldn't say he is unhappy because he has nothing to be unhappy about.

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Selks · 13/01/2014 01:57

At the least of it he sounds very anxious. Please take him to the GP and request a referral to CAMHS which is child mental health services. He needs a proper assessment by a CAMHS clinician to get an understanding of what is going on and what support or therapy he may need. He may not want to go but as parent you have a duty to over rule that and take him - while offering support and reassurance of course.
I say this as a CAMHS professional.

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