2yo 1 week in to no dummy cold turkey - help!

(12 Posts)
rachndan Sat 27-Jul-13 16:45:55

Hi all

Myself and my other half decided it was time for our 2yo daughter to stop using the dummy and last weekend we just took it off her and put it away.

On the Sunday she did very well and only asked for it twice and over the course of the week she has done well considering.

However she is now a completely grumpy little girl whenever anything doesnt go her way or she is told not to do something. Tears for a minute or so then this constant whine until she gets fed up.

We are at the end of our tether now, previously we would have popped the dummy in and that would be it.

We dont want to give in, especially not as we have done a week now but we want other peoples experience about how long this grumpy phase should last?

She has a favourite blanky but this doesnt even make things better. We took her to Toys R Us and nothing really took her fancy so there doesnt seem like there is much chance of finding a suitable replacement comforter.

Our real worry is we are going to Spain in two months and we are dreading the flight. It is only 2 hour flight and we did a 4 hour one to Turkey a couple of months ago which she was fine on, but she had her dummy.

So basically now any time she doesnt get her own way she throws a strop and it is worse since the dummy has been taken away.

I must note though she doesnt even ask for it anymore though.

Be grateful for your thoughts/experiences.

Thanks

sarahloula Sat 27-Jul-13 18:23:52

My dd was 2 in April and for the last month has only been having her dummy at bed time because she's a "big girl" now. She is fine in the day and sees her dummy at bedtime as a bit of a reward. She asked for it fir a few days but is absolutely fine now. My sister with her two put the dummies out on the line for the dummy fairy who left a present the next day in return.

I think you are probably just experiencing normal two yr old behaviour. Seems worse because there's. I funny to distract and you are just having to deal with it if that makes sense. It might not be because she wants or needs it back.

Two year olds strop glares at dd2

Have some wine smile

No dummy- damn phone blush

rachndan Sat 27-Jul-13 18:43:45

Thanks.

It is much worse in the last week.

She normally had tantrums but the dummy obviously eased things. Now with everything she cant have or cant touch it is a tantrum accompanied with crying, then the tears stop and its the even more annoying whinge that continues.

Urgh.

You are not alone. It's normal dont worry.

It is a shock just how much more you have to deal with without the dummy bit it will pass grin

rachndan Sun 28-Jul-13 08:33:10

Thanks for the help/advice.

She doesnt ask for it at all, and when she does mention it she says "num num broken", so she knows it has gone.

When she is having a tantrum or crying she isnt crying over it or crying and asking for it. So I dont know whether these tantrums would have occurred even with it but would have just been quieter with the dummy muffling her noise?

We have 50 days until the flight, she was fine on the last one with it. She is fine in the car without it.

In fact she has been better behaved at nursery and at our other carers without the dummy than she has been with us. Probably because she knows we hold the key to being able to have the dummy.

We just werent sure whether to go back on what we have done until after the holiday. But we dont really want to do that, but probably should have prepared more rather than just taking it away.

But like I say she knows its gone.

Do we just stick it out.

Yes I would just stick it out. If she was younger I'd perhaps say give it back but as she's two and able to communicate more I'd definitely stick it out. Give in now and she will know exactly how to get it back next time.

I think the tantrums are just coincidence rather than a result of the dummy issue.

If a toddler wants to strop, honestly a dummy wouldn't stop them anyway they would just throw it at you smile

Just take a bag of tricks and hold for the best. She may surprise you smile

rachndan Sun 28-Jul-13 09:04:32

Well she isnt 2 yet, she is two in a couple of months, however she can communicate well.

But I dont really want to give in now. I just wondered whether this is the best way to do it.

I went cold turkey with both of mine. Both were fine without it straight away. Of course there are other ways like having it for naps only and at night or sticker charts etc but once you take it away its best to stick with it if your child is old enough to understand. As it will be twice as hard the next time.

It really just sounds like you have a normal two year old who's having a few strops etc this sadly does carry on for a bit but it doesn't last forever. It's just another stage you have to learn how best to deal with it with your child. I just walk away. Dd2 will carry on but she does eventually get bored of having no one listen.

I like to think that it's getting it out the way so 3 will be a breeze grin

But then I am a cold turkey kind of girl smile

rachndan Sun 28-Jul-13 09:28:35

So am I (kind of guy tho).

Its all or nothing really.

Well as she isnt asking for it I will stick to it.

We bought her a little minnie mouse toy yday and hoping she will take to that. Not sure though.

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