Kumon nightmare

(14 Posts)
Bean12 Tue 25-Jun-13 18:34:25

I am not entirely sure if this is even in the right place (newbie) but I need to vent.

I signed my ds up for Kumon a couple of months ago, having read some positive and negative things said about the whole thing. But so far it has been the most tedious, time consuming and frustrating thing I have ever done! Every repetitive worksheet, everything they seem to ignore about child development (getting a child to memorize a whole word, trying to demand that my three your old ds 'reads' a word when they have not started on letters, ignoring phonics altogether etc), the guilt inducing talk when ds does not get 100% and yesterday was the last straw. The woman there had the nerve to say to my ds that if he doesn't finish his work, he will not be a clever boy and so will not make his mummy proud! I have pulled him out the same day but I am still seething. Who says that to a three year old????

But my main concern is the change in ds that has come about just from a few months of Kumon. Before he was a chatty, loud and articulate boy and whenever he is in Kumon he becomes shy, starts babbling instead of speaking and refuses to say letters which I know for a fact he knows. Whenever he does say anything, if it is not relevant to the work he is doing (for instance saying 'I saw a dinosaur at the museum yesterday') the woman just ignores him, not even a 'oh that sounds nice'. He returns to his normal self a few hours later but I just feel so guilty for putting him in that position.

I am sorry I ever even made him start, it seems to be run by people who have no experience in child development or even working with small children and it is frankly, in my opinion, damaging.

Has anyone ever had a similar experience/feeling about the place?

steppemum Netherlands Tue 25-Jun-13 18:42:05

He is simply too young for formal school. That is why schools don't begin at 3.
Some children do learn to read earlier, but most are not ready

Fragglewump Tue 25-Jun-13 18:47:34

Fgs! Who puts a 3 year old in kumon??? Let them be toddlers!! Even formal school has an emphasis on 'learning through play'

Why on earth have you put a three year old in Kumon? Poor boy - let him be a child for now. He'll have another 13 years of formal education.

orangepudding Tue 25-Jun-13 18:53:56

He's too young. I don't think my five year old could cope with it tbh.

Pancakeflipper Tue 25-Jun-13 19:00:15

Crikes. 3yrs old. If you have a child who wants to learn then look at some of the books you can buy and do at home together. Make it be about you and him

Otherwise go to the park, play in the garden, bake millions of cakes, create monsters out of boxes run through the woods and just enjoy his company

(I say this a mother whose youngest son is going to school in Sept and there's just not enough time left for us to be us ).

Bean12 Tue 25-Jun-13 22:51:40

I put him in because a close friend has her three year old daughter going and she loves it and just devours the worksheets, and my ds always showed an interest in what she got for homework and such and so I thought it might be good to get him a place because he initially showed interest. Like I said this was for a few months and as soon as I saw it was not working out for him I pulled him out - I am not entering him for 'child genius' and coaching him fgs, I still play with him, bake with him, take him to museums and run around the garden like a loon with him

It's also quite obvious that I feel bad from my post, so really do not need the 'poor boy' thing; what does a woman need to do to get some sympathy around here?

SimLondon Tue 25-Jun-13 23:42:45

Troll alert.

DoctorAnge Tue 25-Jun-13 23:45:21

At 3 hmm

Ilovediago Tue 25-Jun-13 23:51:40

OP it's a good thing you realised what kind of place that was and recognised your ds didn't like it. Don't feed bad, at least you had the good sense to pull him out, seen some people who severely lack that.

I googled it. Looks a bit suspect to me hmm but then I feel guilty that dd1 goes to nursery at 3

BlissfullyIgnorant Tue 25-Jun-13 23:56:33

Teachers hate Kumon - it's not proper learning, at any age.
Lego
Colouring in
Wet cornflour
Pouring water
Jigsaws
Play dough...
That's learning

I heard of a woman who put both of her DCs into Kumon and couldn't believe they didn't get into the private prep schools of her choice.
A mother I do know sent two DSs to Kumon and it totally buggered everything - conflicting learning processes caused huge probs and she ended up having to change schools

Jinsei Tue 25-Jun-13 23:57:22

I don't really know what you were expecting. What you describe is what kumon is all about - cramming rather than teaching, rote learning rather than understanding. What else did you expect?

Your DS is three FFS! Just take him to the park instead.

Reading all the following posts it would seem that s lot of people feel negatively about Kumon- like yourself.

You've tried it, seen the results and acted accordingly.

You and your son can put this behind you (he's three, its very unlikely he'll remember this when he's four).

Now go and enjoy the sunshine and continue to run like a loon in the park.

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