Will DS EVER be happy playing by himself/amusing himself??!(13 Posts)
Ds1 is now 6mo. He is (and always has been) a v spirited baby, never content to just sit and watch the world go by, always wants constant entertaining, singing, playing, bored of toys easily, is v v nosy, wants to know what's going on etc etc.
At the moment I am exhausted looking after him every day and am beginning to wonder if he will ever get to the stage where he can entertain himself happily for a few mins on his own??! He cannot sit unaided yet - despite lots of prActice with me every day - and so if I need to have a shower/hang the washing out etc he just rolls around on his tummy crying and grizzling until I come back and prop/hold him up again. He hates his bumbo, can now tip himself forward out of his bouncy chair, so there are limited places I can plonk him whilst I get some jobs done. He does like his jumperoo and I can maybe get 10 mins of jobs done whilst he is in there but then e gets bored and it's back to square one!
I love him to bits but am finding the days v long and frustrating at the moment (and I get the sense he is frustrated too!).
Can anyone offe any words of reassurance that this level of clingyness/input needed from me is normal with a 6mo?? Will it get a bit easier as he gets older and can sit/crawl/walk etc etc??
What's he like in a sling? I found it a godsend with my highly spirited dd1 who wouldn't be put down, although she could sit up and play from about 5 months but not for long.
Once she was crawling at 8 months she wasn't quite so clingy, but couldn't take my eyes off her either.
I used to go out as much as possible to baby groups, swimming, singing etc. Mostly for my own sanity as it was a change of scenery and some adult conversation.
my 3 year old was exactly the same, I used to strap a bell onto his foot and he used to entertain himself with that for a while, or a singing bear that used to keep him entertained, does he like music? I know its very difficult and you get to the point where you feel as though your just existing sometimes but he will learn to entertain himself its just finding what he likes ect.
I think just before they learn to sit up, crawl and walk are hard stages. I found my DD got very frustrated at those points because she could nearly do it but not quite and that meant lots of grizzling and neediness. Can you get up and have a shower when someone else is around to watch him?
Agreed it is a lot easier once they can sit on their own. For DS1 the sling and doorway bouncer were lifesavers. DS2 is on the move earlier so that is being helpful, however both boys (DS1 2.10y, DS2 10 months) tend to get bored at home and thrive in new environments, surrounded by people, things to look at and different toys. DS2 is currently much more clingy when we are at home. DS1 is great at playing on his own now, but that did come with time. I'd try to encourage it, especially if you're doing something like hanging the washing - have him near you and surround him with toys. But 6 months is still early days for this. DS1 became much better at proper "playing" with toys after 18 months. Before that his attention span was very short.
Ds was the same. I got through it by buying a good quality sling. I'd use that around the house and garden. I couldn't stand hearing him cry or whinge, so in all honesty, I just took him everywhere with me, even to the loo. He wouldnt even sleep unless on my lap or on the boob so i couldnt do things during nap time either! The only thing I found would keep him entertained was the tv (awaiting the flaming), but if it gives you 20 mins to have a shower and keeps you sane then its worth it........ Having said all this though, it does get better. Ds slowly became more independent, he's still a mummy's boy and needs to know I'm somewhere nearby, but at 23 months he will play for a considerable time on his own. He's an absolute delight, well behaved too and very happy. I'm hoping that's a result of the attachment parenting!
Keep going! It will get better :-)
yes he will but I'd expect the clingyness to last a good while longer -he's only small! RD was exactly this way and never crawled so spent a long time fussing because he couldn't get anywhere/follow me. now at 2.4 he's still pretty clingy at times and definitely high needs but can happily play on his own very well at times (albeit on his terms but it's all a blessing!) - he will obviously do things when he's ready but plonking them in front of the washing machine on a spin cycle was what got both of my DC sitting up reliably, might be worth a go! I really empathise, I remember this stage well and it seems never ending at the time, but I promise you he'll be off doing his own thing before you know it so try and be calm and enjoy him being little
Mine was like this. Became happier when he coukd sit, happier still at crawling, happier still at walking. By 18 months would play on own for much longer than dd who was an easy baby in comparison!
Give him a sibling. Both mine would never play by themselves as babies but they have been entertaining each other since the younger one was 18 months. In my case, two is easier than one.
He is still young so why not do what you have to do - having a shower, hanging out washer etc whilst he has a nap - let some unnecessary jobs go - Wait until after his bedtime to shower?
We had a sort of inflatable ring that DS could be propped up in. He also used it after he could sit unaided as well. It meant that he could sit in it and reach the toys and they couldn't roll too far away.
DS is 2.8 now, and still not the best at entertaining himself, but it does get easier.
DC1 only learned to entertain himself once he learned to read. Have had 2 more dc, and I have been entranced by the way they could play with a toy/ bit of fluff/ their own feet :-). A sling has been a fabulous help with all 3 children, especially dc3 as I find I have more chores/ less inclination to go to as many toddler groups now older two are 7 and 9!
I had same probs and he did get better and better with age. I wld take him outside in pram to watch me hang washing as he is an outdoors boy, he wld watch me from his pram give him some pram toys as well..
We have always showered with him just easier for us as he was so tall he grew out of his baby bath very earlier on.. He love the shower so was easily amused while i could get clean.. Often we wld tag team or dh and i wld shower at same time..
He had a play activity centre thing not sure if that is same as jumperoo, that wld hold his attention for a while, seat in middle that swivels, surrounded but interactive toys that spin, make sounds etc...
Def a frustrating age for them before they can move by themselves... Also DS was a bad sleeper, so the less he sleeps the more clingy he is and whingey he gets and unable to focus on much... I still am so strict with naptimes becos of this issue. Otherwise my day is shit and so is his as he isnt able to cope as well.
We also had a baby hammock which he loved cos it wld sway as he kicked his arms and legs to try and reach a dangling toy.. Ha ha i remember when i took him to paediatrician that just told me how active he was and how i should just put him in pram under the trees and let him watch the leaves moving!!! Yeh sure that reeeallllly worked!!!! What a knob!
Its also great when they start solids cos u can give them something to gnaw on in their pram while they watch you hang washing out, do dishes etc... It is really tough but promise itwill get better month by month...
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