Dd (age 5) is one of the youngest in her year (yr1) - she's also my eldest child. She's been having a hard time at school lately (has a hearing problem) - the teacher says she is fine but she has been miserable. Also, another parent rather cheekily, mentioned to me (while talking about children in our class) that she thought dd could be very nasty. I didn't have a chance to respond because she disappeared (otherwise I would have had a word with her) but she (the mother) is renowned for being a gossip and for getting her eldest child (in juniors) to spy on dd's class (which her ds is in) at breaktime.
Over the last week or so (since her revelation) I've been watching dd with her friends and she seems to be incredibly defensive with them e.g. X will say 'look at my nice shell' and dd will say 'I have one bigger than that' - not in a show off voice but as if she is trying to impress X. Y will say 'what a lovely coat' and she will preen but say nothing back. I had a chat with her about it and told her it was nice to say nice things back to people but she told me 'her brain didn't work that way'.
She does 'feel' for other children e.g. she told me she got a treat because she came top in spelling but if she was a teacher she would give treats to those who came last so they felt better but she seems to get overwhelmed with all her friends and tries to impress them (who are largely at the elder end of the class).
Does this make her sound like a nasty child or can I do anything to help her understand that she doesn't need to impress them just because they are older than her?
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Behaviour/development
Lack of empathy in dd and how to address it
25 replies
foxinsocks · 24/05/2006 20:36
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