What time should a 5 months old go to bed?

[spekulatius]

I usually start getting DD ready for bed at 6 pm, she's asleep by 6.30 or 7. Wakes up loads (breastfed) but was worse is that quite often she will wake up during night & not go back to sleep for 3-4 hours. Anyway, every Tuesday we have to be out til late and she's in bed by 10.30. Does her usual waking up every 2 hours and then is up from 5.30 as always. BUT last night she slept from 10.30 til 5.30, had a quick drink and then slept til 8. So now I don't know what to do tonight. Put her to bed as usual? 10 o'clock? Or maybe 8? Please help! I need some sleep.

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

I would say that you've got it right and you should stick to it. Before you know it she'll be more aware than ever and that routine will be a Godsend.

What do you do when she wakes up for three hours though? Do you put her back to bed after she's fed? Are you feeding in a dimly lit room with no playing or chat?

I would stick to routine tonight...don't keep her up till 10...it's not a good time for bedtime.

Also...why do you have to be out late every Tuesday? How will you manage this when she's in Preschool for instance?

[spekulatius]

I also think she needs more sleep because she wakes up early no matter what time she goes to sleep. So the later she goes the more sleep she is missing. But last night was the first night in ages that she slept through. Usually she sleeps until 10 and from then on wakes up every 2 hours to feed.
I don't know why she sometimes won't go back to sleep. Usually as soon as she is latched on she goes back to sleep and drinks in her sleep but sometimes she has her eyes wide open and once she finishes drinking has a look around, starts talking and smiling really cute. I try to ignore her, don't talk much and switch off lights but nothing helps. Rocking, putting her back in cot, putting her next to me, I once went into spare bedroom as I thought she might settle if I'm not there but no.
And she doesn't catch up in the daytime. Only catnaps. but we are getting better with them, I usually get her to nap after being awake for 90 minutes and it stops her getting overtired. Guess will just have to persevere and hope that things will improve. Just dont' know how she does it. I'm shattered and she is doesn't seem to mind at all, always happy. Even at 2 in the morning!

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

Does she cry after a feed once she starts chatting? (God I know how hard it is when they act all cute in the semi darkness!) Or does she just murmer away to herself?

If she's not crying, just put her back and ignore her...if she's yelling to be picked up, pick her up offer more feed and if that's not it, just put her back...I remember this...my DD2 didn't sleep through till she was 3!

[spekulatius]

Oh god, really? She never cries but is really noisy, I can't sleep like that. That's the problem, otherwise I would leave her. Strange thing is that she used to sleep through from 6-10 weeks but since then has had no real pattern. We've had 2 weeks of waking up every 30 minutes but that's now better. Diagnosed with reflux and now on gaviscon. Only that she doesnt wakes up grumpy, otherwise I would have thought it might be the reflux. Who knows. Hopefully she will start taking longer naps soon, that might help.

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

Is she in your room? Will you be moving her when she's a bit older? It does help...when they're next to you they're blinking loud aren't they! I suppose if she was in pain she'd be letting you know anyway...it sounds just like she's lively and sociable to me!

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

There is no time that a baby this young should be in bed. If a later bedtime suits you, just do it.

[Debs75]

You really need a bedtime which suits you and her and one which gives you both the sleep you need. Having a set bedtime doesn't always mean you will get that though.
Try not to get hung up on needing her to be in bed by 7pm. My dmum was like that and would sit with my dsis for hours every night as she had to get her to bed at 7pm, even though she never dropped off to sleep until gone 10.
Personally I don't get the thinking behind struggling to get a child to sleep for hours. My dd's stayed up with us until they were really sleepy then off to bed. Some nights they were up at 8ish some nights it was nearer 11. I didn't have to take them anywhere first thing so they had a lie in if they needed it. Now they have worked themselves into their own routines, 1 goes at half 7 asleep by 8 the other a little later.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Agree, mine were never in bed early when they were this young but were both snoring by 8 tonight.

If you are struggling with her sleep try Sound Sleep by Sarah Woodhouse.

[Jakeyblueblue]

I'm with the last few posters. I've never had a bed time for ds. Goes to bed when tired. He's now 22 months and will ask to go to bed when he's ready. Usually about 10 . He sleeps in until around 9 in the morning so gets plenty of sleep, I also don't have any bedtime battles. He always goes straight to sleep.
Do what's right for you and your little one and the test will sort itself out.

[spekulatius]

Well, last night DD slept from 8-6 only woke up once to feed. She used to go to bed at 8 but was always screaming while I got her ready, that's why I put her down earlier now and she doesn't scream. I wouldn't worry at all if I didn't have to go back to work. But I'll going back in September and will be working shifts, including a late and night. Don't want to make it hard for my husband. Otherwise I would let her lead and enjoy.

[Alibabaandthe40nappies]

We used to take DS1 to bed with us when we went until he was about a year, because it meant we got the benefit of his longest chunk of sleep. Gradually his bedtime came earlier until it was 8pm once he dropped his nap at 2.4.

You must do whatever fits with your life and makes you all happy. We have never wanted our kids asleep at 6.30/7pm, because it would have meant DH not seeing them Monday morning to Saturday morning.

[kalidasa]

Hi. My son is also five months old. He goes to bed at about 8. I think we could have opted for earlier (he's often quite sleepy for the last hour or so), but I'm back at work now so it suits all three of us to have three hours (5-8pm) after he's picked up from the childminder. He needs to wind down and reconnect with us as well I think. He is mix fed because I am at work now - so bottles during the day - but I breast feed evenings/mornings/night and always try to get two feeds in in the last couple of hours before bed, a sort of little 'cluster feed' to keep him going. He's pretty good and doesn't usually feed at night anymore (provided you count 5am as the morning!).