Was horrible to 5yo this morning. Feel so bad but shes at school now. complete over reaction.

(32 Posts)
retrorita Tue 19-Mar-13 09:53:27

She has gone from being a really well behaved child to a child who cares little for consequences overnight.

In the past month she has written over the walls and doors upstairs with crayon. She would never have done this a year ago. She is breaking things and seems set on destruction for no reason. Some things I can't afford to replace.

I've talked to her till I'm blue in the face, explaining why isn't kind to ruin things or break other peoples things. I use time out as a punishment for everything.

Yesterday while sitting in a time out for rudeness to her sibling she sat and pulled the laces out of my shoes. So this morning, with about five minutes to leave I had to lace them all back up. I didn't have time and I was cross that she still isn't learning not to touch and ruin other peoples belongings. It wasn't a bad thing really but it was the straw that broke the camel back.

So I put her in a time out, told her she wasn't having her usual treat after school, took away her comforter that she still sleeps with and said she can't have it back till she learns to respect other peoples things. I'd spent ages putting her hair up and I took that out and told her she isn't going to have nice things done to her till she can start being nice. And then I made her walk to school instead of scooting as I said I didn't see why I should carry her scooter home when she can't be kind to me.

She went in school subdued, I gave her a quick kiss and walked away instead of the usual cuddle and kind words. Now I feel awful. I was horrible. And that's no way to send her off to school.

I hope she's ok. I feel so guilty.

retrorita Tue 19-Mar-13 12:50:13

I hadn't thought of how being good at school all day might be affecting her.

I think I ask too much of her as well. She says sometimes 'I find it hard to be good all the time.'

This makes sense now when I factor school in.

Computer time is a good idea. I'm going to try that.

Sparklingbrook Tue 19-Mar-13 13:25:26

I remember it well retrorita. Went to Parents' Evening and it seemed DS2 was an angel at school. Not the child that came home at 3pm. It was as if he was bursting to be naughty after holding it in all day. sad

butterflyexperience Tue 19-Mar-13 14:29:20

I don't think you were ott at all

I would have taken away much more! wink

mummy2benji Tue 19-Mar-13 19:29:04

I find it hard not to lose it and go ott too, it's so hard when they drive you to the edge of your sanity! It always makes me feel like a failure and very guilty when I do. Some kind of strategy sounds a good plan, even if it is as simple as counting to ten silently before reacting to something that initially makes your blood boil! I am off to look up that 123 Magic book that was recommended...

retrorita Tue 19-Mar-13 20:27:47

She was fine when she came home. I talked to her and she seemed to understand.

But then bedtime ended in a meltdown when she made a huge mess with my shampoo when she should have been brushing her teeth.

<<bangs head on wall>>

tazmo Tue 19-Mar-13 21:37:05

We all snap every so often. My ds kept vomiting every time we left the room at bedtime until I went mental one night at him. He never did it again!!! Not saying one should do it all the time but don't be too hard on yourself and grade your sanctions!

KeepCoolCalmAndCollected Tue 19-Mar-13 23:00:56

Yes mornings can be very stressful!!

Most of us have over-reacted and have ended up feeling terribly sad and guilty.

However, I think sometimes as a parent you have to put your foot down so that they know you really do mean business, and they have to take you SERIOUSLY. I do believe this, because if a child won't listen to you and respect you now, what are the chances of that happening when they are much older.

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