Mumsnet Talk

No allergies as far as we know, he's been on inhalers (brown and blue) since he was 3mths old. And the montelukast since Jan last year. I think it's the montelukast which has made the most improvement to his asthma, however this is the one with the side effects (from what we can see)
The steroids inhaler is twice daily, and the inhalers are as and when needed.
We haven't had him 'drug free' since 3mths old.
No idea what effect the taking away of the meds would have (given the amount of admissions we've had with all the meds.

It's a right old mess really isn't it?

Sorry, hadn't picked up that he's on strong steroids for asthma. DD3 was even more wired than usual when she was on those. What happens if you take him off them entirely? Does he start having lots of attacks? Interestingly DD3 is now 3.6 and appears to have stopped being so asthmatic. She hasn't had any puffs for months now. Her eczema has also mostly cleared up. [hopeful emoticon]

Oh, and are you giving him a good vitamin supplement? Being deficient in certain nutrients could be at the root of quite a lot of things.

To answer OP, frankly I would deal with sleep first, then food, then potty.

If he starts sleeping properly, so will you. He'll be less tired and more amenable to the other things, and you'll be better rested to tackle the challenges they bring!

I'm sorry, thesecondcoming, that wasn't helpful, was it? I suppose my view is always coloured by the fact that mine always crashed out instantly and stayed that way if they were in our bed.

If he doesn't sleep even in your bed, I second sorting his medicine out. And LOADS of carb heavy food. Doesn't matter what, so long as he'll eat it.

Meds not mess - not doing so well today am I??!

Sorry iPod.... Favourite fruit purée.

The less fuss made the better. Things are improving re mealtimes being less stressful. I really second the recommendation for "my child won't eat" - I just read it yesterday after seeing recommended here and I think it's a great book, for the epilogue alone if nothing else!

Also I think you've answered your own q re which to do first - sleep - but it does sound a possibility the mess are messing things up so please don't be too harsh on the poor little mite!

Yes, bed first.

I remember taking DS back to his room 20 times in a row one night.

Not much talking, not much anger, just a very sinple: "you sleep in your own bed, night night." repeat ad infinitum.

Problem is, if you even give in once, Eg when he is poorly or you are having a weak moment, you will be back at square one. It pays to be consistent. They get the message.

Agree with Beamur about no snacks or attention at night. There is plenty of time for that in the day time.

The potty training does not sound bad, imo, sounds as if he is almost ready, and think dad should maybe take that one on, when he is around.

Good luck!

I know nothing... On the scale of things! But I have a fussy eating 2 yr old and I can tell you that I am much less stressed at meal times now I try not to let it get to me. If we have something new I try to make sure there's somethin she likes on the plate too. If she tries dinner and doesn't like it she can have some bread and butter. I always give her pudding (ie yoghurt or fruit or her current fav

Feel for you - sleep first definitely! Sleep deprivation will send you insane.

I used a fixed gate he couldn't open - that you had to climb over. Then gradual withdrawal. I have to say this worked for a bit but not in the end. He was different to yours tho and actually just wanted to be in with his brother. It's definitely worth a try. Be strong, he needs sleep and so do you.

Good luck - here's some and some .

I don't think there is any harm in trying to resettle him in the middle of the night, with clear rules that it is not time for play. He needs to learn that you need your space and he his. Going to your bed is a habit not a need initially. Does he get out enough in the day time to wear him out, do you get a break ?

I know he is seeker.
But I am knackered. Bone tired.
And feel shit about being irritated by the twiddling, and the kicking, and the recitals of 'songs he knows and loves' at 3am.

And I really suggest taking all the pressure off eating. Give him what he'll eat. Don't stress about it, honestly. And let him have healthy snacks. Some toddlers are better off grazing. And if what's available to graze on is healthy, don't fret about it.

And make sure he has something carb heavy before bed. Warm milk and biscuits, or toast or cereal or something. I bet he's hungry.

He's only very little,you know!

Right. I will ring the asthma nurses tomorrow as a matter of urgency and see what they advise.
We have hypo allergenic bedding etc. I could damp dust and vac more often.

I don't mind him in our bed if he'd sleep all night in it. It's the repeated wakings/disturbances that are doing my head in.

And then I feel guilty for being pissed off with him/it as it is probably not his fault. Like I say, good job he's cute.

He's not had his blue inhaler 4 hourly for a week now. So, he's well.

(that said he's still snotty, still off his food and so I don't know <shrugs> weeps)

Until he eats properly I think you'd have problems with both sleep and pott(er)y training . Certainly asthma may not be helping his appetite.

Differentnameforthis- we are talking about a 2 year old with asthma- not a bloody minded teenager!

TBH I think you should forget dealing with everything else and get him back to a specialist regarding his asthma as a matter of urgency. I think all his problems stem from poorly controlled/uncontrolled asthma and it needs addressing asap.

As others have said, I would focus on sleep and ignore the toilet and food.

I would speak to the asthma nurse as I think that the asthma is not under control if he needs his blue that often. I have asthma and find swimming helps a great deal. It would also make him more tired. Could you find time to take him swimming - ideally every day?

As for wakenings, how about rapid return?

I wish you luck! There is nothing worse than sleep deprivation (DD is 6 months old and giving us a run for our money!

I think you should forget about him stopping his nap for the moment. If he is that knackered then he needs it, and it sounds as if it is his asthma not the fact that he isn't tired which is mucking up nights. Someone said upthread about

Is there anyone you can speak to before April? 4 hourly blue inhalers indicates badly controlled asthma and I would be really concerned about them wanting to reduce the steroids. I can see that they - and you - don't want him to have more of them than necessary, but the wheezing is also damaging.

Has he (and you) got hypoallergenic bedding?

Is resigning yourself to him being in your bed an option?

I am not enormously fussed about his pottery training, m&s do nice mugs etc but seriously, if he is coming to tell us he needs a wee then shouldn't we go with it rather than making him wee his nappy?? The poos I have no idea how we'll do it while he won't sit on any kind of potty or toilet.

Food wise I am sick of chucking food in the bin. I don't mind him not eating a varied diet but I do object to him p and down from the table/disrupting meals with his acting up, the fairly rigid diet is typical of a two year old. I know that will change in time.

It's the sleep more than anything else really. I am sure he'd be more malleable when he's getting more kip. I am sure I'd be less stressed out with the lack of food etc if i thought he was well rested. He should be ditching his daytime nap soonish (?)but is knacked, so nods off on the school run to pick up dd. if he Is forced to walk to school he'll then eat nothing for his tea (which I dish up at 5.30) as he's too tired. Meaning we out him to bed at 7 and he'll kip for 2 hours and have his 'nap' then get up about 9pm ready to go...

We have an active social life in the day (go to various play gym / soft plays/swimming/ the park) we go to the park, every day it's not raining for an hour after school pick up. He gets fresh air, he gets exercise.

He won't sleep.
Next drs appt is April. They wanted to reduce the steroid (which has long term side effects) not the montelukast (which is the one with the insomnia side effects?)
We're FUCKEd aren't we???!

We have a 2.6 year old ds who is the youngest. He started toilet training but a winter bug has thrown that plan right out of the window. I'm just going to wait for him to indicate that he's ready to start again. No rush.

I too can't get him to eat a varied diet. Luckily he follows the crowd at nursery and eats everything they give him. So, that a two course snack in the morning, two course lunch and a two course snack in the afternoon.

I am rubbish with sleep training but dh is very good. I leave it to him.

So, it would seem that I am, in fact, a bit rubbish and need to rely on others to train my dc.

Potty training - wait a bit.

Food - give him snacks. Decent ones. And sit him down for meals but ignore. He might be waking up hungry at night - they need snacks at this age. You want him to eat.

As for bedtime - focus on getting him in bed at the start first. Set up camp in his room and stay until he sleeps. Repeat repeat repeat for night wakings (camp in his room. Then once he's staying in there, gradually withdraw.

Although if he's got asthma - you need to fix that. He won't be able to breathe properly at night and that might be why he wakes.

TSC pred majorly affects appetite too! I would focus on asthma first - what sort of follow up is he getting? When is next resp clinic appointment? Maybe just tiny changes for now.

I just want to second what 3littlefrogs said about inhalers, I am asthmatic and was so poorly after having a cold recently. I was taking my blue inhaler 4 times a day as I was so short of breath, sleeping badly and my skin was terrible. I went to see the asthma nurse who gave me a brown inhaler to take twice daily and I am like a different person, I feel a hundred times better. Go and see whoever deals with the asthma as I'm sure this will make a difference. Good luck.