Feeling well guilty - food issues in toddler

(7 Posts)
tazmo Wed 06-Feb-13 19:00:54

Haved posted a lot on MN but still have probs with dd2, who will be 3 in may. She was having too much milk, but we managed to stop that. But her diet is v limited but trying to get her to,eat and try new foods. Whenever we sit down to eat, she just wants to play (as does ds who is 4) but really getting fed up of her no eating. Have done whatever one says - put new foods along ones she likes - but we're even lucky if she even eats the food she likes (which she must be getting fed up of - I would). Done the whole no reaction thing (saying fine etc, but she does usually get something else like yoghurt or custard).

Tonight, she did her usual and said she wanted to go to bed (as she gets a bottle of milk at night usually) - but tonight we have refused her milk and given her water instead and she is inconsolable. She is really crying and obviously crying/upset cos she's hypoglycaemic - but food is becoming such an issue. I don't know if I doing right by refusing her bottle as obviously it will be seen as a punishment and might make her having a bigger issue with food. But we have to make her hungry - but to be fair, eating cereal is never usually an issue.

We have taken her to see paed and dietician and they r not worried because she is gaining weight, albeit slowly and is developing normally! Feels like I have an anorexic 2 year old!! Don't understand it as we eat a wide range of foods and we are not exactly skinny. Ds1 was also not that bothered with food, but at least he ate the main staples such as meat/ cheese - dd2 literally eats carbs! He is now even starting to try things like pasta which he never liked.

SO do I just try to get through this with her foibles and all - or literally starve her until she starts eating. She is V V V STRONG WILLED but I am feeling so rubbish about this!

lorisparkle Wed 06-Feb-13 19:22:49

If pead and dietitian are not worried then you should try and reassure yourself and not worry too.

I give my DS s a small bowl of breakfast, some dried fruit, a cup of milk and then some fruit juice. They eat what they want can have toast if they want . Then they have a healthy snack - bread sticks, fruit, etc. And water mid morning. Lunch is a cup of milk, a small plate of food then a yoghurt. They eat what they want and can have fruit if they want. Tea us usually a small plate of the family meal.

Sometimes ds3 who is 2:7 will eat nothing sometimes loads. I always serve carrots as I know he will eat them and try to give him a meal he likes every other day. I know he will eat the yoghurt and apples but the rest is hit and miss. However he is growing and active so I don't worry.

With all my boys their diet was hit and miss and from talking to friends fussiness is normal among toddlers. However some friends started only giving them what they like and regret it. Keep offering a variety and try not to worry.

Have you tried cutting out bottle but having a small cup of milk instead.

Lookslikerain Wed 06-Feb-13 20:11:24

My DS has just turned 3 and seems (fingers crossed) to be coming out of what was a very fussy phase. I don't know what changed for him but he's suddenly starting to try new things and going back to things he used to eat before the fussiness.

I would always put something on the plate that I know he liked (may only be sweetcorn or peas) and if he didn't eat it then I'd assume he wasn't hungry. At the worst point we were down to fish fingers and breakfast cereal! Anything else was very hit or miss (usually miss). So we just let him major on breakfast and at least if he didn't eat much else that day, I'd know he'd eaten plenty in the morning. Play to your strengths! grin He didn't lose any weight so I guess he was getting what he needed. If your DD isn't losing weight then, it might not be ideal, but she must be getting what she needs form the little she is eating. Hang in there!

Lookslikerain Wed 06-Feb-13 20:14:44

Oh, I should probably add that he still has milk first thing every morning (in bed with me while I have my first tea of the day) and at bedtime before he brushes his teeth. He won't drink it any other time of the day. If he doesn't eat much dinner at night, I know he isn't going to bed hungry.

snowflakehellokitty Wed 06-Feb-13 20:45:18

I have two dds who are both fussy they r 7 and 4
The 7 yr old has been fussy since she was born
It is so hard having a fussy child very frustrating

She eats -

Breakfast

Cereal and a yoghurt
Lunch - marmite sandwich ( she wont eat any other sandwiches )
Crisps and a banana
Tea - chicken ( burgers, fingers or nuggets ) she wont eat any other meat
Will hv this with pasta or rice
Then yoghurts

Emmie412 Thu 07-Feb-13 12:13:28

Does she go to nursery? Mine eats absolutely everything in nursery including curry and celery but would not touch these with a long stick at home. Lots of activities and fresh air bring on the appetite and the example of other kids propels her to try stuff.

rrreow Thu 07-Feb-13 17:03:06

Could you have a Google for portion sizes for toddlers? I thought my DS wasn't eating much, but it turns out I expected him to be eating way more than what he needs (probably because I've seen him eat big quantities of stuff he really loves).

And I also experience the same thing as Emmie, DS eats a lot at nursery, even things he doesn't eat at home (veg mainly!). Often we get told he has had a second helping. I am sure they think he doesn't get fed at home grin It is not uncommon for him to not touch his dinner at all on the days he's been at nursery.

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