Two week old baby

(31 Posts)
PeggyL Wed 30-Jan-13 18:55:29

Hi all, I know it's early days as LO is only 2 weeks old but does anyone have any tips on helping her sleep. I know it's a bit crazy at night with a newborn but she just won't settle and if she does fall asleep on me/feeding/with dummy - she just wakes up again as soon as put her down or when dummy falls out. Thanks x

meganw Thu 31-Jan-13 11:15:23

Try putting something that smells of you in the basket/crib with her, like a t-shirt that you've worn overnight and keep her tightly swaddled. These are the things that worked for us to get our daughter to sleep in her basket for a few hours here and there, but to be honest when they are that tiny there's not much you can do - they don't even realise that they're a different person to you yet! It's a shock to join the outside world and adapt to being a little individual.

It gets easier about 6-8 weeks and they become more able to sleep alone, but till then my advice would just be to respond to her in whatever way gets both of you some rest. I wish my baby would sleep on me now but she hardly ever will!

amazingmumof6 Thu 31-Jan-13 11:12:12

astronaut - I totally agree with your friend!
I still pretty much winging it with baby and she is 9 months old!!!!
she has a vague routine based on her brothers routines, but I've given up trying to do a set nap or bedtime for now, it's just too complicated.

I decided that I will not stress about when she sleeps or wakes up, because every day's routine is different due to school runs v. weekends, clubs at different times on different days for different kids, shopping trips, gp appointments, grandma looking after her & everything else going on with the rest of the family!
I tried to figure out a time schedule but I got really frustrated as no 2 days are the same, it's just impossible.

If she she's tired she'll fall asleep or I put her to bed and if I have to wake her up then that's that.

she's healthy and happy and developing well and I feel so much better for embracing a slightly organized chaos rather than feel disorganized and a failure for not keeping to a strict routine!

Astr0naut Thu 31-Jan-13 10:57:17

A wise friend of mine, who'd had 5 children (including twins) gave me this advice when I had my first:

Just go with it for the first 3 months. Don't try routines or stressing about when they do or don't sleep, because it will fall into place.

Every time I'd panic about things not happening 'properly', I'd think about this. THere's also a theory that babies aren't really 'separate' from you until they're about 3 months, which would explain why it suddenly gets a bit easier around then.

Incidentally, Dc2 was an absolute bugger for teh first 4 weeks - she'd sleep happily in her basket during the day, but would only sleep on me or dh at night. It drove me nuts.

By 10 weeks, she was happily sleeping in her cot in her own room. But still had me up at least twice a night until she was 1

amazingmumof6 Thu 31-Jan-13 10:55:43

just sleep when you can, live in your pj and dressing gown- bliss!

if people want to visit tell them to bring food or hold baby while you are having a nice bath!

they can make their own tea and give you one or take the bin out and pack the dishwasher!

this is definitely the time to be unashamedly selfish, putting baby, you and DH needs first! every one else can wait.

early days are foggy, but it is the same for all of us, muddling through, having bad days and good days - welcome to motherhood!

you are doing great!smile

RooneyMara Thu 31-Jan-13 10:47:19

Peggy don't worry, it will get easier very soon - this bit is like flying by the seat of your pants particularly when you've never done it before.

It will get better in a few weeks. Seriously - you're doing grand smile and it's not anything you're doing wrong, honestly, it's not necessary to panic. Babies get better at sleeping all by themselves, wonderful when it happens - just lower expectations, try to minimise any other demands on your time and it'll all be ok x

amazingmumof6 Thu 31-Jan-13 10:29:54

I use/d a fleece blanket in place of sheet, rooneymara says, the cool sheet can wake them up.

I also did this - put a soft pillow under the sheet, which you can kind of mould to her body shape,
kind of like a dent in the middle of pillow- when they are so little their backs are curled up, so when you put then on a flat surface they roll or stretch and get startled and wake up!
think shape of baby car seat - how it follows the curve of their back, that's where I got the idea from.

mine actually preferred to sleep on their sides anyway, so I did that and put something next to their backs to keep them stay in that position.

I don't know if any of that makes sense

yes, 6 little monsters angels, though I'm not incredible..but hopefully good enough smile

PeggyL Thu 31-Jan-13 10:04:46

Morning all, another crap night had by all, hubbie went to sleep on sofa at 1am, I had LO beside me in bed and she finally settled by 4am, for the hour before this dummy in, kept falling out, she kept crying etc…I’m feeling a little crazy this morning!!

Iggly – no she hasn’t got a tongue tie, I had the midwives check in the hospital, I am Infacol’ing her before every feed which does help bring the wind up…eventually!

amazingmumof6 - can’t believe you’ve got 6 kids, that is truly incredible, you must be an incredible mum, going to watch that clip again later and write the noises down, see if that helps.

Rikalaily – will try the hot water bottle, could it really be that simple, I think when you’re knackered you just can’t think straight can you, but they’re so warm and snug on or beside us aren’t they.
Preggersshock – who or what is Ewan the dream sheep?!

Honeytea – she was fine in the swaddle for about a week and then just kept wriggling out of it (however tight it was, she’s a determined little thing I think!), she seems to get on better with her arms out, so hard to know what to do when it’s the dead of night and you’re tired/crying!

RooneyMara – I’ve got this really soft blankie, it’s not very big but so soft and snug, do you think it would be ok to place that in the Moses under her head, should I try it during the day first, can’t imagine it moving up to cover her face, but you never know?

Thanks for all your advice, I tried replying to this post from my mobile in the dead of night, but just couldn’t think straight/kept pressing the wrong buttons, this site is so helpful isn’t it xx

RooneyMara Thu 31-Jan-13 07:39:46

Peggy - try a woollen blanket in the cot as well. Or next to you in the bed. They are a warmer surface to be put down onto and it really helps ds if he's put on wool instead of a cool sheet.

<takes over entire thread with ramblings>
<gets coat>

RooneyMara Thu 31-Jan-13 07:36:13

Also the sounds change as the baby gets bigger. So at the moment ds3 is on the 'eh-eh' and 'elair' stage, but it's changing already, and sometimes we get 'helair' instead of 'elair', sometimes he manages to say what sounds like 'ungeling' when he is cross, in a week or two it'll be 'h-eh, h-eh' and then 'ef-ef-ef' so it all depends on the age of the baby, too.

As they get more consonants they make better words smile

RooneyMara Thu 31-Jan-13 07:33:25

I watched this last night and had never heard of it before but Ive been teaching my other children about what the different noises mean since ds3 was born 4 weeks ago.

I thought about this video all night and I have t o say I don't agree with her on all of the noises.

Mine all made a sound like 'eh-eh-eh' when they were hungry - the baby in the 'burp' clip is clearly after milk, not needing winding! But they showed him on the 'hungry' one too..I think? Also it's accompanied by fast breathing and rooting and sometimes a hand to the mouth.

the upset cry is 'elair' here - often repeated quite quickly with a square mouth and wobbling tongue when he gets really upset. I think it's debatable if that's discomfort caused by wind, colic, uncomfy car seat and so on.

Those are the main ones I think. So I feel quite cross with her and I'd hate someone with a baby making the hungry noise to think it needs winding some more. etc etc

but she is kind of right in some ways...though I think most mums develop a sense of what the noises mean after having one or two kids.

amazingmumof6 Wed 30-Jan-13 23:38:22

I found the hungry sound especially hilarious, because it sounds exactly like the Hungarian word for "don't"!! (ne)

as if a baby would be crying "don't" don't" don't" - as in don't starve me any longer.....grin

it is the same sound she says because they are reflexes not conscious "words".
best understood with the "wind" sound, love Oprah grunting!!!!!grin

BertieBotts Wed 30-Jan-13 23:17:27

Ha! How funny. DS is 4 now but he had a very distinctive hungry cry when he was a newborn, so I just watched that to see if it matched and it did grin although I always described/thought of his as a "lair" rather than "neh", but exactly the same when listening to the clips of the babies. What a weird thing that they all make the same sounds!

amazingmumof6 Wed 30-Jan-13 23:09:32

pleasenomorepeppa it's like magic!
give it a day or too and you'll start to hear the different sounds!

I actually put the clip on a few times while she was crying for a proper comparison - it was comic, but worked.

oh and if you burp baby, then start feeding him/her, then baby stops feeding and cries " burp me" - do that! when all is good you can resume the feeding.

it's just so fantastic, and once you get the hang of it saves a lot of guess work. and your sanity.

honeytea Wed 30-Jan-13 21:11:21

My friend gave me a swaddle me blanket when my ds was 6 days old it was amazing it really helped him sleep. I'd breastfeed him to sleep then my dp would put him in the sidecar cot and put his hand on ds's tummy and rock him from side to side for a few mins. In the early days ds would wake 3-4 times a night now we have put him in a baby sleepingbag and he wakes 1-2 times. He has even started letting me put him down in tge daytime for naps, he is only 6 weeks and I miss his newborn cuddles!

Just watched the YouTube clip. DH & I are sitting with 8 day old DD2 & translating!
She's v windy & sleeps on my chest most of the day & night, I'm figuring it won't last long & at least she's not crying smile.

preggersshock Wed 30-Jan-13 20:28:53

I agree with everyone else, cuddle her, it goes too quick! I remember posting a very similar message & everyone said the same thing to me. DD is 14 weeks now and in her own room and her big cot and it went too quick, I miss our evening TV & cuddles! Wish now i'd worried about it less & spent my time cuddling her instead of stressing about why she wouldn't go in her own bed. She'll go in her bed when she is ready :-) Then you'll need a hot water bottle & Ewan the dream sheep! She'll feel lovely & secure, it'll be like being back in her old bedroom (mummy's tummy) grin

Rikalaily Wed 30-Jan-13 20:07:17

Sometimes they wake when you put them down because they feel colder without your body heat. Try laying a warm hotwater bottle in the crib before you put her down to warm it a little. Also 3 of my four have prefered sleeping on thier side, they would wake up within seconds if I put the on their backs.

amazingmumof6 Wed 30-Jan-13 20:04:52

nothing you can do about hiccups, whether in or out of womb!

you can try the anti- colic formulas (or whatever they are called) I tried Aptamil and Cow & Gate, bit good.

I also used Avent anti-colic bottles, the ones with the blue ring inside - trick is to not tighten it too hard, it won't work.

amazingmumof6 Wed 30-Jan-13 20:01:23

peggyL - I know, it is, best thing ever!
it should be only thing given to a mother on postnatal ward if nothing else!!!!

I only discovered it when my DD ( 6th child) was 5-6 weeks old and as soon as I started listening my life changed! I realized it works and I was so relieved!
I felt like Mother Earth, but was also in physical pain & floods of tears thinking about all the unnecessary struggles I went through with the boys and wishing I had known this when DS1 was a newborn!

I'm quite tempted to have 1 or 2 more kids, just so that I can do the "baby talk" and breeze through it!!!!!

yes, write down the sounds on cards , one set where baby sleeps for nighttime/naps, 1 set for where they come handy during the day.

and remember there are mixed sounds too, say hunger and wet, but listen for the most urgent one.

also they change the sounds quickly, so if you can hear "burp" "hunger" and "wet",
change nappy quickly, then burp baby, then feed! you'll hear the sounds change after each action, it's unbelievable!

DeDevilTail Wed 30-Jan-13 19:59:57

White noise was my saviour. The hairdryer lulled DD to sleep for weeks.

Iggly Wed 30-Jan-13 19:58:08

Mmmm well let her sleep on you... As she gets a bit bigger you can put her down I promise - she will let you.

Has she been checked for tongue tie? Can you make sure she's got a good seal on the bottle?

PeggyL Wed 30-Jan-13 19:52:56

She is now bottle fed as got mastitis (expressed and froze milk) but formula now. I make sure I don't shake the bottles to avoid getting air bubbles in etc but a lot of the time she gets the hiccups too...any tips on that too as I think wind is a right bugger for keeping them awake and uncomfortable isn't it? x

SirBoobAlot Wed 30-Jan-13 19:48:17

They pass before you know it, promise smile

As an aside, you say it takes ages to wind her. Is she breastfed or bottle fed?

PeggyL Wed 30-Jan-13 19:46:04

amazingmumof6 - just watched a bit of that youtube clip, pretty impressive, just need to write down the sounds & what they mean, I know I'll forget otherwise! smile

PeggyL Wed 30-Jan-13 19:45:00

I've tried rocking her, letting her sleep on me but then she wakes as soon as I put her down, I've fallen asleep with her on me a few times now. It takes ages to get the wind from her, up to an hour after a feed, before you know it, it's 3am!!

Oh my god RooneyMara - 1 hours sleep a night, how are you surviving?! I thought my 3/4 hours was bad. SirBoobAlot - when you put it like that I just feel a lot less stressed, you're so right, I need to get over the crap nights and enjoy her! xx

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