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Behaviour/development

Terrible nearly twos

2 replies

TwinkleToesMummy · 08/12/2012 19:31

Hi
My ds is 23mths old & his tantrums have really started escalating such that it's getting really difficult for me to go out with him and my dd (3.8) on my own. Today we went to the zoo as a treat with my mum and step dad & he had 6 complete meltdowns before we came home after lunch. They start over anything - he wants to walk in a different direction to my dd, wants to take his coat off in sub zero temperatures, doesn't want to eat what I've put out for him, can't find a particular toy. He just seems so full of frustration & rage when anything is not exactly how he wants it (& as his language is really limited as yet - I'm finding it hard to understand what it is that he does want quite often - only that it is definately NOT whatever it is that I want him to do).

When he's not tantrumming he's a really funny, cheeky, cuddly little boy but I'm feeling increasingly drained & kinda traumatised by his behaviour - he can scream for a long long time & it feels like I've been assaulted even tho he's never hit me. I'm at a loss how to help him (and me) come thru this in a positive way. I keep hoping that it'll get better when he can speak more.

I wondered if anyone has any ideas.

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 08/12/2012 21:15

If you think that some of his frustration may come from not being able to communicate, have you thought of doing makaton with him Twinkle? We signed with ours and while they weren't tantrum free, it certainly seemed to help.

What do you do when he does tantrum?

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TwinkleToesMummy · 08/12/2012 22:44

Hi
Thankyou very much for that - that's a great idea. I've a friend who teaches sign language - I'll ask her to teach us some basics.

When we're at home & he's really going for it I tend to ignore it & then wait till there's a pause in it to intervene & distract but it's much more tricky (& really embarrassing) when we're out. Although he doesn't hit me, if he's really in a state he can hit other children if he's near them & he does the whole 'my legs don't work & my arms are slidey' so I really struggle to pick him up. I tend to try to leave whatever situation we're in as that seems to calm him down but it means that we're cutting activities short for my dd.