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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

Am I allowed a tiny boast? (Also hope for mums of fidgety kids!)

20 replies

Ellbell · 31/03/2006 22:43

Sorry... I don't want to be tedious, but I know that I posted on a thread about 5-y-olds who just can't sit still/concentrate the other day, and I just wanted to tell people that there is hope! (Oh, and I wanted to have a little boast too )

My dd1 is a lovely, articulate child who loves school and is doing well. She's 5.10 and in Year 1. BUT she just cannot sit still. She fidgets and fiddles with stuff all the time. She is always getting told off (gently - her teacher is lovely) for doing things like pulling bits off the carpet and acting out little stories with them as the characters during 'carpet-time' and generally having ants in her pants.

At her school on Fridays they have 'special assembly' and two children in each class are called out, one for good work and one for good behaviour. Dd1 has been praised for good work a couple of times (once in Reception and once in Year 1) but never for good behaviour. She asked the teacher why not once and she was told that she had to learn to sit still. At an open evening I did ask the teacher whether she felt that her behaviour was something we should be worried about, and she felt that it was fine for her, that she just 'needs' to fiddle/wriggle, but that she preferred to correct it because it tended to disrupt the children around her (who were probably getting bits of carpet stuck to them!!!).

Anyway, today dd1 was chosen to go out in assembly for good behaviour and her teacher said that she had been making a real effort to sit still and concentrate (... which I think means that she wasn't entirely successful, but at least she'd been trying, lol). As well as going up in assembly and getting a sticker, she also got to go to a special 'tea party' with the Headteacher (she had a party ring biscuit and some orange juice... she doesn't even like orange juice, but was so excited she drank it anyway!).

Today on the way home from school she said 'Mummy, today has been the best day of my life'. She was literally grinning all evening!

[Proud emoticon]

OK... I'll shut up now . Just had to share!

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LadyTophamHatt · 31/03/2006 22:46

edam · 31/03/2006 22:53

Oh, that is sweet. Aw.

edam · 31/03/2006 22:55

Btw, fidgety people are naturally slimmer than non-fidgets - all those tiny movements add up. So it's not entirely a bad thing...

moondog · 31/03/2006 23:23

Lovely Ell!
My 5 year old got a special certificate this week for being a 'good friend'.
She is so shy and a bit of a loner so it was doubly wonderful.
Well done Babybell!!

fastasleep · 31/03/2006 23:29

Awwwww I was that kid! I still am

('Mum I finished a project!!'... 'Well done dear, it only took you 19 years to discover that particular skill...')

nooka · 31/03/2006 23:33

lol! I also have a fidgety kid, who is still trying hard in yr2. But then he has a fidgety dad too, so I'm sure it won't hold him back too much (and they are both skinny). Sounds like you have a good school there Ellbell :)

snailspace · 31/03/2006 23:42

edam, how true! DD is as fidgety as they come and skinny as a rake. Never equated the two before.

Ellbell, how lovely for your dd - I do hope that gives her motivation to work at her wriggles.

Ellbell · 01/04/2006 00:01

Oh, FA, she never finishes anything. She starts strongly but is normally to be found staring into space lost in a dream world while everyone else is packing away. When asked why she's not doing whatever-it-is, she looks blank as if to say 'Was I meant to be doing something?'. Frustrating... but kinda cute! (Her dream world is so much more fun than the 'real' world...) I hope she learns to manage it, but never grows out of it. It's who she is (and we love her for it...).

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fastasleep · 01/04/2006 00:05

Good for you Ellbell, my mums spent years trying to turn me into some mad genius who always got A*'s it hindered me a lot...

cultivate her, she sounds like a special girl :)

fastasleep · 01/04/2006 00:06

mum*

hullabaloo · 01/04/2006 23:52

My Ds is about to be six and has the exact same problem. i get frustrated with it because I can recognise the part of myself that frustrates me!! I can't sit still and constantly forget my mission!
My DS is a bit beanpole-esque but unfortunately his Mummy is not

stoppinattwo · 02/04/2006 17:42

Its my metabolism. Im fidgety but you would never guess (fatty fidget!!)DS is a terrible fidget and is alway in bother at school for forgetting to put his hand up to answer a question, he just shouts out.......... Hmmmmm remember doin that myself, just cant help it. Told him this afternoon to just stop talking for 5 mins so he's cut out red and yellow cards and has proceeded to red card me all afternoon

ScummyMummy · 02/04/2006 17:46

Fab!

Sparklemagic · 02/04/2006 17:54

Ellbell, that's lovely, and her comment about it being the best day of her life brought tears to my eyes, because it made me realise how important these little bits of praise and attention can be at school!

Ellbell · 03/04/2006 01:12

I know, Sparkle. This has been so important for her. She has made a card for her teachers (her idea) and has written inside 'It was the best day of my life when you chose me for my good behaviour'. She is desperate to please, and it has made me really see how important it is to acknowledge that she is trying to be 'good', even though she doesn't always succeed.

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Sparklemagic · 03/04/2006 08:55

Ellbell, I think that card is a brilliant idea as it will remind the teachers just how important these things are. What a job teaching is! Knowing that you have the power to make one day the best day of someone's life, or not! Blimey...the responsibility.....

Berries · 03/04/2006 09:46

dd1 frequently used to fall off her chair at school and meal times, she fidgeted so much. We'd be nicely eating a meal & next thing she would be on the floor looking up at us . She's now 10, & although she still tends to fidget (and can't stop talking at home) she is doing great at school - her current teacher didn't believe us when we said what she was like. We still call her Tigger at home though (keeps bouncing)

Glad your dd had such a great day ellbell, hope she doesn't lose too much of her bounce though!

Ellbell · 03/04/2006 13:25

LOL Berries BabyBell has been known to fall off her chair too, and to walk into lampposts....

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Berries · 03/04/2006 13:36

lampposts - dd once bounced off a lamppost & fell over - too busy talking & not looking where she was going. Also, when she was about 4 (I think) she was wing-mirror height & walking through a car park was like going round a pinball machine - & I was holding her hand!!!
She started riding at 6 & I think that may have helped - horses won't stand for much fidgeting

Ellbell · 03/04/2006 16:18

My dd rides too, but it hasn't helped yet. It runs in the family though. My dad is totally bald and my mum despairs as he always has huge gashes, bumps and grazes on his head from walking into stuff. DD got sent home from school today after being knocked over in the playground and bumping her head. The huge egg she got from the previous fall has only just gone down! Bless her.

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