early waking in a 3 year old - please help - I;ve tried every trick in the book

[sickandtired]

DS1 (3) keeps waking from 4.30 onwards, nver later than 6am, today I have ben up since 5am, and whilst he is now on the sofa happilly watching tv complaining that he's tired he is literally sleep depriving the whole family, he wakes me by getting out of bed, that in turn wakes dp and that in turn wakes ds2 (nearly 2). We have even resorted to putting ds2 in to a travel cot in my ds's room when they are not with us but its not really fair on him.

DS1 is in a bed (has been for a long time), he goes to bed at around 7pm (this is later than he used to go) and I have stopped his nap, even though it makes him a misserable turnip about 4.30 in the afternoon.

I have tried just walking him calmly back to bed with out saying anything (did this for a month - no result) I have tried a reward system (worked once) I have tried shouting my brains out at him (no result, he cried, I felt awful).

Basically, if I don't get some sleep soon, I'm going to cry

[Auntymandy]

mine used to wake between 5 and half past. So for a couple of mornings I went in with him and said we couldnt get up till 6. Did this with 3 year old and 16 month old as well. 3 days it took and now they dont wake till 6 or after.
Just be stropng

[Auntymandy]

or even strong!

[sickandtired]

will try that, was thinking of getting a timer night light that goes off, and saying once its lit he can get up - what do you think?

[Auntymandy]

That might work.
My Ds just waits in bed now. sometimes calls me, but when I go in after 6, he says 'can we get up now?'
I am really pleased at how quickly I got results, with both of them. Its just a matter of breaking the habit I suppose

[ruthydd]

Have you tried a bunny clock ? \www.bunnyclock.com{bunnyclock} My son (3.5) now knows not to get out of bed until 7.30am when the bunny wakes up. I even hear him telling friends off that stay the night if they try to get up sooner. Downside it costs £20 and is a nasty looking thing that doesn't always wake up at all, plus you must put it out of reach so it can't be woken up on purpose. Its a complete rip-off for a horrible piece of plastic but the best £20 I ever spent in terms of extra hours of sleep!

[ruthydd]

opps .....thats bunnyclock and I bought mine from blooming marvellous

[ruthydd]

I should also point out it didn't work at all for a friend, so no promises! Good luck

[mistressmiggins]

I bought a lamp that DS can turn on

told him when he awakes, he can switch light on and play QUIETLY with toys til I come in

worked for me and DS was around 3 yrs

[throckenholt]

we got a digital clock and said that they have to stay in their rooms until after 6 - it seems to help a lot.

[Wordsmith]

How about putting a stairgate on his bedroom door? We've just done this as DS1 and 2 have got bunkbeds and DS2 thinks it's great that he has the 'right to roam'. Luckily DS2 shouting at the gate doesn't wake DS1 up - can't think why not.

Another thing is to go into his room and sit by his bed, or by the door, until he goes back to sleep. Gradually (over a period of days/weeks depending on the size of his room) move further away from his bed until you are out of the bedroom door. He probably just wants to be with you, and if he thinks you are in the room it might placate him.

I cope with this by having cushions and a blanket on the floor so I can be comfortable, and a magazine to read to pass the time.

[Wordsmith]

(Mind you DS2 is younger than your DS - he's only 22 months.)

[IlanaK]

If he knows numbers at all, I would go for a digital clock. He doesn't need to tell time. You can cover the minutes with thick paper stuck on and just oleave the hour showing. You cen tell him that he can get up and turn his light on when it says 6, but not 4 or 5. It will take a few days practise, but it does work. Much cheaper than the bunny clock too.

[dexter]

sickandtired, I have a similar thing at the moment. My son wakes from 5.30pm onward. He's always woken around 6 / 6.30 from babyhood. However, before we moved house last month we had him in a fantastic routine; basically we told him he mustn't get up until he heard the 'beep' of our alarm clock. He was a gem and waited, playing quietly to himself until it went off, when he'd run in.

We've lost this a bit since we moved house, understandably I think because it was such a big change for him. I'm just hoping it will come back! I think I need to spell it out again to him. I was surprised how well he kept to it before so that may be worth a try. All I did (and need to do again!) was tell him not to get up, then took him back to his room if he did get up - only took literally a couple of days before he got the idea.

[sickandtired]

thanks for all the suggestions, I think I will try the clock idea, it really is getting me down, he does nothing but winge and moan all day and scream and make everyone dislike him - and all because he is over tired

[nitfreecod]

my only avice is to shout at hima dn send him back to bed
he is three fgs
tell him off and get him a clock

[sickandtired]

Cod - my earlier post

" have tried just walking him calmly back to bed with out saying anything (did this for a month - no result) I have tried a reward system (worked once) I have tried shouting my brains out at him (no result, he cried, I felt awful)."

I feel liek I shout all the time!

[nitfreecod]

yes well tell him its no tolerance now

he cried - so?
he si being a pita

youare right andhe is wrong

[sickandtired]

I know where your coming from, and I agree! I am the parent, I am in charge! If I do get up in the end its no fun time, he is not allowed to play with toys and the TV stays off until 6.30/7, which is when I am happy to get up. I make breakfast for them but then ignore by gettin gon with household stuff, so its not really like he is being rewarded?

Got the bunny clock on order, he say me while I was online ordering and was very interestefd, told him what it was for and he said he wants it, so we will have to see if it works?

[ProfessorG]

agree with digital clock. insist he stays in his room until a reasonable time. he can play in there. stick to your guns - it will probably pass - we had this with DS1 but he sleeps until 7 now or if he doesn't at least he stays in his room.

i wouldn't feed him until a time you were happy to be out of bed, tbh

[PandaG]

I can agree with bunny clock, has worked for both our 2, and now they are older (6 and nearly 4, and older one can tell the time) we have said can't get up (or at least annoy me or DH )til 7.30 at the weekend, this works at least 50 % of the time

[cece]

what about putting him to bed later?

[jambot]

I'll go with the opposite and say try putting him down earlier, especially as you say how tired he is from late afternoon onwards. Have a look at Dr Marc Weissbluths book, 'Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child'. He explains how overtiredness impacts on night sleep and gives quite a few case studies to do with early waking. He says putting to bed later in the hope that they will wake later is counterproductive. The more tired they are at bedtime, the more adrenalin in the system, which leads to poorer sleep quality. I would try putting him down at 6:30 and see what happens.

[jambot]

Or even earlier. If my DD is looking really tired in the late afternoon, she will often be put to bed up to 45mins earlier than normal. She has never woken any earlier than normal as a result.

[stitch]

get up, give him a bottle of milk, park in front of the telly. go back to sleep.

[Frizbetheexpansionset]

When ss took to doing this we got him a colour coded clock, off the web, red, amber green thing, can't remember which co tho....argh! had seen it advertised in mother n baby tho.....any help?