Why is there such negativity regarding the middle names Mae/May, Rose & Grace?

(90 Posts)
Sasparillo Tue 15-Jan-13 20:39:25

After reading a few different posts on MN, there seems to be a lot of slating of the above stated middle names. I honestly don't see why people hate them so much! Back in 'my day' it was Jane & Louise that were popular girls middle names, mine being Jane. It has never ever bothered me in the slightest that I share the same middle name with half the female population in my age group, I don't see why it would bother anyone. It's only a middle name. I think that Mae, Rose and Grace are perfectly acceptable and quite frankly, very pretty names for a first or middle name, so what's the issue? I'd understand if people were naming their daughters Gertrude or Fanny! Lol x

katiecubs Tue 15-Jan-13 20:43:42

i don't hate them - think they are all lovely smile

Unimaginative and ubiquitous. As are jane and Louise!

willyoulistentome Tue 15-Jan-13 20:50:01

Overused and boring!

MolotovCocktail Tue 15-Jan-13 20:52:29

It's because they're popular, I think. 'Baby Names' frequenters to be name geeks (as in interested and knowledgeable about names/naming trends and get excited about names) and so those that seem "unimaginative and ubiquitous" are generally disliked.

I consider myself to be a name geek and I love Grace, Mae and Rose smile Very pretty ideed an can see why they're popular.

My middle name is Jane too smile

I don't think it's a problem with them being middle names - let's face it, the middle name only gets announced when the baby arrives, and then very quickly forgotten by everyone who isn't close family.

I think the slating comes when it's bolted onto the first name with a hyphen.

Trills Tue 15-Jan-13 21:01:18

Is there?

I haven't heard any.

Are you sure you're not imagining it?

What's wrong with Gertrude?

Fanny is slang for either vagina or bum, but Gertrude is not. Now you are being just as arbitrary and unreasonable as the people you are complaining about.

OkayHazel Tue 15-Jan-13 21:03:10

Little sister's middle name is Grace, but this wasn't common 17 years ago when she was born.

They just get a bad rep for being common, and MN types often want unusual, that's all.

PoppyWearer Tue 15-Jan-13 21:07:59

Eh?

All lovely names.

Maybe the problem is when they are double-barrelled?

takeaway2 Tue 15-Jan-13 21:11:54

Our daughter actually has two of the three names you mentioned!

We liked Grace because we wanted a 'virtue' and Faith didn't quite go with our surname. We didn't realise that Grace was that popular! May/Mae is actually my middle name. So we named her that too. We've since met a few little girls with middle names of Rose (my great aunt's name!) and May. Didn't realise it was that common or popular either.

I have older female relatives called daisy, ivy, rose, may...! grin

TheSecondComing Tue 15-Jan-13 21:14:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PoppyWearer Tue 15-Jan-13 21:17:10

I forgot to mention that my middle name is Jane and DD's is Rose!

dixiechick1975 Tue 15-Jan-13 21:20:04

I went to a girls school - 28 in my class had the middle name Louise! Just me and my friend didn't - come to think of it she didn't have a middle name.

Viviennemary Tue 15-Jan-13 21:20:27

Nothing wrong with those names. They are quite nice. Not keen on the spelling Mae though.

my middle name is rose... i think its lovely, it was my nans name

so cheers to those that think its boring (or whatever) hmm

there are worse names out there imo

Smudging Tue 15-Jan-13 21:24:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AgathaTrunchbull Tue 15-Jan-13 21:25:35

They're nice enough names, but seem to be all over the place at the moment.

My middle name's Louise. Hate it. It's pointless and meaningless to me - apparently it just sounded 'right' with my first name.

My dd's mn is grace, and I think it's beautiful, so what if its popular!

tammytoby Tue 15-Jan-13 23:14:32

Because they are overused and dull! They serve no purpose in identifying a person nor do they always have much meaning. Might as well name them 'girl'.

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Tue 15-Jan-13 23:18:07

I do always tell people who are considering those names, which is to say, all people ever, that everyone's daughter will also have the same middle name. I mean, fine, and everything, but there are squillions of names out there.

Trinpy Tue 15-Jan-13 23:33:00

They are all perfectly nice names, just a bit blah and unimaginative.

Sasparillo Tue 15-Jan-13 23:38:49

Gertrude :-o come on, It's my dp's grandmothers middle name (she is 85!) and even she is too mortified to tell people what it is, I had to ask his mum. She's totally embarrassed by it!

emmyloo2 Wed 16-Jan-13 02:38:43

I love both names but when every girl born has them as her middle name, it just screams of unoriginality to me. It doesn't bother me terribley to be honest but enough that I wouldn't use any of the above as a middle name.

However, I am considering Rose as a first name, that's how much I love it.

TheDarkSideOfTheSpoon Wed 16-Jan-13 03:25:35

Dd1's middle name is Jayne, after my mum.

Dd2's middle name is Rose, after DH's nan.

It would appear to some that makes them "unimaginative and dull" hmm but both names go beautifully with their first names and were chosen because they mean something to our family. And it's nobody else's business anyway.

Lebkuchenlover Wed 16-Jan-13 11:30:06

Because they don't serve any purpose. They don't help in 'identifying' a person, which is the purpose of a name. They are just fillers.

Middle names are your chance to either honour loved ones or to be a little more original,especially if the first name is quite common (e.g. think Harry Jones or Ella Smith - there must be thousands of them and a more unique middle name might help identify them).

We sometimes forget WHY we name our children imo.

FoofFighter Wed 16-Jan-13 11:33:50

They are so well used because they go well with so many names, just as Louise in it's day did as well. Nothing at all wrong with them apart from being overused.

Lebkuchenlover Wed 16-Jan-13 11:40:47

But Jane and Louise still 'go' with many names. But as a result of having been overused in the 1970s people have become tired of them, like with any fashion trend. The same will likely happen with the current overused names imo.

BanghamTheDirtyScone Wed 16-Jan-13 11:59:41

I think it's just because, well, they are very popular. Almost every female child I know or hear of seems to have one of them as a middle name.

They are great names. It's just kind of predictable iyswim...which is a proper shame as they're so beautiful in their own right.

And they go with everything!

evamummy Wed 16-Jan-13 12:41:59

Every other girl I know has Rose or May as her middle name, honestly!

Seems like many people simply choose a name 'that sounds nice' and is 'trendy' rather than taking the time to find a suitable middle name - a name that might reflect the child's cultural heritage, honours a family member or simply helps to make the child's overall name a little more interesting/unique.

I too have a standard 70s middle name. I feel it is quite dull, boring and a little pointless imo. I'd much rather have been given something more interesting or meaningful.

Cecil10 Wed 16-Jan-13 12:51:18

My Dd1 was named after two maiden great aunts who are huge characters in our family folklore. One of them was called May, hence that's her middle name. I don't know how people can say that such names serve no purpose. It seems from other posts that lots of people have used these names because they are/ were the names of now elderly/ deceased relatives. What a wonderful way to give them a sense of who they are and where they come from. I hope that my dd will be very proud of her name and its association when she is older.

They're nice names, but they show lack of imagination, especially when paired with a really popular first name.

Middle names are a great opportunity to honour a family member, but instead, so many parents just lump one of these filler middle names in. It's boring.

If people are going to use a really popular first name, they're better avoiding a filler, because there will be countless with that "combo" out there.

I don't find a filler paired a rarer first name isn't so bad. Examples: Sophie Grace makes me yawn, whereas Mariana Grace makes me think 'wow - I like that'.

atthewelles Wed 16-Jan-13 12:51:58

I find it hard to get excited about middle names and am amazed at how much thought some people on here put into them. When I was a child your middle name was usually after a Saint (first daughters nearly always had Mary as their second name) and now it's quite often after a parent or grandparent.
They're never used so I don't think how nice they sound, how populare they are etc is terribly important.

Oh and I meant to say, of course some people who use them will have relatives with those names, that's different.

Many people use them as fillers though.

We used one of them as a 'filler' for dd2; as she has an unusual, but not outlandish, first name, plus our surname is complicated and often mis spelt. We wanted a short name which she wouldn't need to explain/spell, and which she could resort to if she didn't like her first name. Our other two have more popular first names, and more unusual middle names. We're happy with it, sorry if it offends your sensitve ears.

Themobstersknife Wed 16-Jan-13 13:15:21

Because some people are horrible.
And they also make assumptions about others, and judge them accordingly.
In my family, May is a name that has been used for several generations as a middle name. But apparently, my using it makes me unoriginal. How boring of me to give my daughter the same middle name as my late mother.
I have committed an even worse sin. I have named my other daughter after her late grandmother on my husband's side which apparently means she can never make anything of herself as it is 'cutesy', 'girly' name.
For what its worth, both my girls are remarkable, original, feisty and strong, and we haven't had to name them Mildred or Persephone to prove this.

Bue Wed 16-Jan-13 13:49:59

They're just placeholders, that's why.

I think the middle spot should be used for a family name, or maybe a name you love but wouldn't consider for a first name. Something that actually has a point to it.

evamummy Wed 16-Jan-13 13:58:45

Yes, for some people these names may well have some meaning and/or are family names - in that case the child will grow up with a lovely association.

But it seems that a large majority of parents simply choose such names without too much consideration, simply because they sound 'nice' and everyone else is using them. And then such names are simply meaningless fillers.

evamummy Wed 16-Jan-13 14:01:42

"we haven't had to name them Mildred or Persephone to prove this. "

Why are you implying that people who love the name Mildred or Persephone are trying to 'prove' anything. I know a lovely Sephie (Persephone) whose parents simply love the name. Also, both names seem to fulfill their purpose of identification better than, say Ella May or Maisy Grace. More importantly, thankfully we all have different tastes and shouldn't we all be encouraging MORE name diversity - makes life much more interesting!

BanghamTheDirtyScone Wed 16-Jan-13 14:01:52

In a way it's a shame for those who want to use these names for genuine, meaningful reasons, that everyone else and their dog has used them for no particular reason but that they sound pretty. I mean nothing wrong with that as such but it kind of takes over the name a bit.

I have two dds with these as middle names. Both were named well over a decade ago so if it's now 'common and dull' hmm it's not my fault! In my case both dds have long names for first names and so I wanted something shortish. Fwiw I have

Miranda Rose
&
Roasalind Grace

and if you really want to call that 'unimaginative' then I think you've got very odd standards indeed grin

Themobstersknife Wed 16-Jan-13 14:16:59

Only that names like Mildred and Persephone seem to be swooned over on this forum, and for some of the reasons cited on here, i.e. because people want to be original or different. Didn't say anything wrong with them. We didn't want to choose them because we wanted to use family names. And it seems will be judged for doing so by people like the ones on this thread. You can't really pull me up on something and then say other names serve their purpose of identification 'better'. Yes, maybe according to you.
Am stepping away from this thread so lot can continue to bitch about how wonderful and diverse you all are.

Themobstersknife Wed 16-Jan-13 14:18:33

I really am going... But 'placeholders'? Really?
You sound delightful.

shoobidoo Wed 16-Jan-13 14:37:56

I've not read all the responses but to answer the OP, my opinion is that these middle names are simply used too often these days. There are so many names to choose from, it seems a shame to give our kids the same few names.....

Alisvolatpropiis Wed 16-Jan-13 14:49:28

They're just over used now. As Louise was.

Sasparillo Wed 16-Jan-13 15:03:01

I see the room is divided on this, but it's only a name? Right? I don't think it should define you as a person, your character, sense of humour and personality should. If I met someone with a truely outlandish name (Persephone Gertrude, as an example! Tee hee) who was a horrible person, or a Ellie-Mae or Harry who lit up the room and was a Lovely person, to me the would be a lot more memorable, there name wouldn't come into it for me, but maybe I'm just one of those boring, unimaginative people seeing as my dd has one of these middle names (again, a family name on my mums side) and I don't actually know many with the same middle name, as when people introduce their children, they don't tend to disclose middle names, do they?

Alisvolatpropiis Wed 16-Jan-13 15:10:07

I think they're nice names,particularly Grace.

As an aside I've noticed that most of these names are hard to pair with another name if they are in first name spot. Maybe that is another reason they are so often used as middles?

shoobidoo Wed 16-Jan-13 15:25:36

Sasparillo, nobody is saying anything about a person's character, whether horrible or lovely.

What we are doing is answering your op question as to why people find the names May/Grace/Rose overused.

thegreylady Wed 16-Jan-13 18:08:48

I know a baby Trudy which may well be short for Gertrude or maybe Ermintrude grin.
I dont think Grace or Rose are overused as mn though May/Mae does seem to be popular.When I was young everyone was * Ann[e]

schplappo Wed 16-Jan-13 18:13:29

I have a very unusual middle name - I've never met anyone else unfortunate enough to be lumbered with it - and have spent my life trying to avoid telling people what it is. I say go for something that sounds nice and isn't weird. So what if lots of others have it too.

Greensleeves Wed 16-Jan-13 18:20:03

I used to like May and Rose as middle names, before I realised that virtually every little girl has them - really, of all the white British children I know (and I am a supply teacher, so I know lots) the number of -May and -Rose names is just unbelievable. Today I taught Ellie-Mae, Kieri-Rose, Gracie-Mae, Lillie-May and Freya-Rose, and that's just the hyphenated ones

it's almost like we are acquiring a mannerism where we have to say "May" or "Rose" after every girl's name to show that it's a girl... like "Daniel San"

TerrariaMum Wed 16-Jan-13 18:22:26

I'm with schplappo. I have an unpronounceable unusual first name and a middle name that is technically a male one (surname). As a result of hating my name growing up and wishing desperately that I were called Jane (or Rose or Louise or Grace or anything like that), DD's middle name is Jane. Her first name isn't unpronounceable or too unusual.

I wanted her to have the choice I didn't get. She can have her first name or a simple middle name instead of being lumbered for life with a name she hates. Caveat: I don't hate my name anymore, I just dislike it.

MadBusLady Wed 16-Jan-13 20:56:33

Agree they are overused. My nan's name is Grace which makes it a very obvious middle name choice, but I would hesitate a bit because of its popularity.

grin at "name geeks". Yes, that is definitely true. I don't think anyone should take our name geekery personally!

LuckyOwl28 Wed 16-Jan-13 21:25:17

Always make me laugh how opinionated people can be on here, especially regarding baby names!

Who are we to say someone else must give their child a name with a purpose?

Great if you have a relative with a name you like that you can pass on to your child. But maybe you don't.

Maybe you don't like names that have some fancy foreign, ancient meaning. Maybe you just like the sound of the name, or it really suits your surname.
Why is that bad?

I personally think there are many more important factors which 'identify' a person, a name is just a starting point.

Either way everyone has their own reasons for choosing their own child's name! Even if we wouldn't choose them ourselves, we don't have to be so rude hmm

I'm just chuffed me and the other half finally agreed on names, thought we were never going to get there! grin

LuckyOwl28 Wed 16-Jan-13 21:26:19

I feel I must add our names do not include any in the title, although I am a Louise (middle name) grin

MadBusLady Thu 17-Jan-13 08:18:26

Always make me laugh how opinionated people can be on here, especially regarding baby names!

Well, that's usually because people are asking for opinions confused There wouldn't be any point if everyone just said "Oh yes, lovely!" to every suggestion for fear of being thought "rude".

extracrunchy Thu 17-Jan-13 08:47:17

My middle name is May! I quite like it..? I think it's just a bit old fashioned.

Anonymumous Thu 17-Jan-13 14:29:24

Grace is too religious? confused My middle name is Grace, and it never occurred to me that it was remotely religious. It just means I am graceful, like a ballerina!

Agree that it's been done to death now though.

atthewelles Thu 17-Jan-13 14:32:44

Why is offering an opinion, on a discussion forum, 'opinionated LuckyOwl. It makes me laugh when people come on here and give out to people for offering an opinion and say 'its none of your business' what someone calls their baby/whether someone likes a particular name or whatever. I always want to ask 'Well, what are you doing on a discussion forum called baby names then'?

LuckyOwl28 Thu 17-Jan-13 19:03:55

Because there is a difference in offering your opinion and being directly insulting to those people who may have the names themselves and/or have named their children with these names.

Some people appear incapable of expressing their opinions in a polite way, and I've seen it time and time again on this forum (particularly on this subject).

Some people may not be offended, but others certainly will when a child's name they may have put much thought into becomes branded as 'dull', 'pointless' or 'lacking in identity'.

Everyone has opinions, of course. Everyone also has feelings and I think people should be more tactful when expressing opinions on a personal subject such as baby names.

sparklechops Thu 17-Jan-13 19:06:01

My dd's middle name is one of these names - named after my granny who died when I was pregnant. Who cares if it's boring or overused? It's beautiful and special to me...I expect most other parents who chose it as a middle name think it's beautiful for their daughter too.

Incidentally I have one of the hated seventies middle names but as a first name. I used to love meeting people who 'shared' my name!

Chugchug Thu 17-Jan-13 19:09:52

Because every single baby girl I know born in the last 2 years locally has one of these names as a middle name or first name, usually Rose though.

There are so many gorgeous names for girls I cant understand why everyone has to pick the same name. My Ds's class will
be full of Rose and Something-Rose, I pity the teacher.

elfycat Thu 17-Jan-13 19:21:43

DDs middle names are Grace and May, named after paternal great-grandmothers (my side's alternatives were Phyllis and Myrtle).

Sorry if they're boring but I got lumbered with Louise which I quite like wink

ByTheWay1 Thu 17-Jan-13 19:29:35

mine were born 12 and 10 years ago and got saddled with Jane and Rose respectively for middle names - just because they sounded nice with their first names... so :P

Greensleeves Thu 17-Jan-13 19:33:04

That's because we don't want to be polite LuckyOwl. If you ask for opinions on MN you get them, warts and all.

There are other, "nicer" parenting forums if you prefer the "ur babe ur choice hun x" approach...

LuckyOwl28 Thu 17-Jan-13 19:51:10

General Ps and Qs
We'd appreciate it if you could use the same courtesy when posting messages on Talk as you would use when speaking to someone face to face. Please do bear in mind how difficult this parenting business can be, and if there's one thing all of us could do with, it's some moral support.

Would you approach a stranger and tell them what a dull, pointless name they've given their child?

No, you'd probably be tactful and say something along the lines of 'It's not for me, but...' or maybe 'It's a shame it's so popular' etc...

That's exactly the point i'm trying to make. Express opinions by all means, there would be little point in the forum else. But don't go overboard with criticism unless you'd quite happily do that to someone's face. wink

MadBusLady Thu 17-Jan-13 20:23:47

Which just goes to show how stupid a lot of interest forum rules are. I've come across this in other fora too, but elements of MN seem particularly keen to cling to the idea that talking on the internet is the same as real life.

It isn't. It is plain refusal to look facts in the face to state otherwise.

That doesn't mean fora don't have their own self-regulating standards of behaviour, and actively being a dick will rarely be tolerated anywhere. But the style of conversation is different from real life, there's no getting away from it. A better analogy, particularly on boards like Baby Names and AIBU, is probably focus groups. No-one would say focus groups are "rude", but they are certainly not operating by the same rules they would in a face-to-face social situation with people they are going to see again. That's just the way it is - there wouldn't be any point in them otherwise.

In practice of course, MN knows all this too, because in all the time I've been reading the babynames board I've never seen anyone moderated for saying something they probably wouldn't say to someone's face in a social situation. Which is quite right.

JumpingJetFlash Thu 17-Jan-13 20:41:06

We picked Rose as a middle name as it was my much loved Nanna's name - hadn't realised that meant my daughter had no identity or presence (think her class teacher might disagree as EVERYONE knows when she is in the room :-))

However, people's opinions are just that - opinions! I didn't name my child to impress anyone else and I love traditional/classic names personally so I really don't care if others don't like it!

LuckyOwl28 Thu 17-Jan-13 21:18:39

I'm sure you know best.

Happy Pregnancy!

florry88 Thu 17-Jan-13 21:21:10

In answer to the original question, snobbery

MadBusLady Thu 17-Jan-13 22:18:39

Thanks, LuckyOwl, but I didn't know I was pregnant! shock wink

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Thu 17-Jan-13 22:25:14

My middle name is Grace and I was born in 1974. It was considered weirdly religious and old-fashioned when I went to school and my friends would snigger when we sang 'Amazing Grace'. Everyone else had a Proper Middle Name (Jane, Anne, Marie, Louise)

Mother was clearly an early adopter. smile

ClaraBean Thu 17-Jan-13 22:51:53

I think middle names should have more meaning than just because it fits with the first name.
I wouldn't use those middle names because I like a longer middle name, one that we adore and/or family names. So our dd's have the middle names Matilda and Evangeline Sheena.
I also adore the name Gertrude! It is one of our favourites and would use it for a fn if we ever manage to get pg again (along with Beryl, Susan and Morag), so we clearly have very different taste in names.

VenusRising Thu 17-Jan-13 22:59:31

I think they're both lovely, and also Gertrude and Fanny.

trills Fanny, is short for Frances, nothing to do with vagina or bum, except in your own mind!

Julygal Thu 17-Jan-13 23:23:36

Perhaps it's as simple as people liking them? I wanted my children to have a middle name because I don't have one and always wanted one, so made that decision many years ago!! My eldest daughter has the first name as one of the middle names you mention and her middle name is a name me and DH liked. 2nd DD's middle name is after a song that reminded me of my teenage years and DH was happy to go with my choice!

aufaniae Fri 18-Jan-13 13:20:02

They are lovely on their own, but that's really not the point!

They're on pretty much every baby name thread here asking for middle names. I feel like shouting "BINGO" when all three are mentioned grin

I have nothing against people picking these names if they love them and they mean something to them.

But they're just so ubiquitous they have become the default. If someone here suggests May, Grace or Rose to someone else as a middle name, I think come on, how hard did you think about that? Not at all really!

It's like my asking DP "do I look nice in this?" and him saying "yes dear" while hardly looking at me! It's a stock response, requiring no imagination or thought at all IMO.

Purely personal preference now, but I think it's a real shame not to use a middle name which means something to you. And unless you have a particular reason to use May, Rose of Grace (which to be fair, many people do) why go for the default when so many other names are available to you? Also it's a chance to go for something a little more interesting / less conservative than the first name (as they so rarely get used) or alternatively to add a conservative name if you've gone for an outlandish first name!

Why not chose a relative you want to honour, or your favourite actress / musician, or a name with a great story behind it, or one from your grandparents' country if different to your own - or whatever, just not the default!

aufaniae Fri 18-Jan-13 13:22:32

"Perhaps it's as simple as people liking them?"

On an individual basis, yes. But the fact that so many people are using them means it's a fashion, and many of those people are being influenced by that, whether they realise it or not.

We humans can be very sheep-like sometimes! It's important to rail against our sheep-like tendencies where we can IMO grin

bruffin Fri 18-Jan-13 13:37:17

Why not chose a relative you want to honour, or your favourite actress / musician, or a name with a great story behind it, or one from your grandparents' country if different to your own - or whatever, just not the default!

why do you assume that people are plucking the name out of mid air and not honouring a relative?

My DD middle name is May, but that was because of family tradition. Both my DM and GM had May as a middle name. It also goes very well with her first name. She is 15 now and at the time i didnt realise May was a popular middle name.
They are short one syllable names so fit very well with multisyllable first names.

20wkbaby Fri 18-Jan-13 14:31:23

For me they are used so frequently (probably because they go with a lot of names) that they almost seem like a reflex reaction rather than a consideration.

I feel the same way about Emily and Jessica, both lovely names but as if there is no real thought behind them - and I know this is not true from friends who have named their children those names.

People always assume on Mumsnet that if you choose an unusual name it is because you want to be different and you are using your child to achieve it. A lot of people just like the names, likewise popular/ trendy names - why would you use your child to try and be trendy? perhaps they just like the name.

People make assumptions about every name you choose, you can't win unless you choose a name you love, and then you can't lose.

ballroompink Fri 18-Jan-13 14:43:36

They are now ubiquitous, but there's nothing wrong with them at all.

One of my middle names is Rose. When I was pregnant last year, the middle name we had for a girl was Rose BECAUSE it is one of my middle names. We ended up with a DS. But I would still use Rose in future.

aufaniae Fri 18-Jan-13 15:25:51

"why do you assume that people are plucking the name out of mid air and not honouring a relative?"

Bruffin I don't!

If you actually read my post, I said " And unless you have a particular reason to use May, Rose of Grace (which to be fair, many people do) "

I expect many people are honouring a relative, especially as lots people of our grandparents generation had these names.

However not everyone is, not by a long shot. It's a fashion, and many people are choosing them for that reason (whether they are aware of it or not).

Also those who suggest May, Rose & Grace as middle names on mumsnet threads time and time again are surely not honouring relatives as their presumably don't know the OP!

aufaniae Fri 18-Jan-13 15:26:58

*they <sigh>

aimingtobeaperfectionist Fri 18-Jan-13 15:42:25

DD has my grandmothers name as her middle name which happens to be one of these 'dull, boring, unimaginative' names. We lost my beautiful gran just after DD was born so it holds a lot of significance an meaning for us.

Also nice to hear my name (which I like FWIW) to be called 'horrible'.

Cheers.

atthewelles Fri 18-Jan-13 16:17:55

I think you're taking this thread a bit too personally aiming.

aimingtobeaperfectionist Fri 18-Jan-13 20:09:59

I most likely am but it drives me mad "what's her name? Oh yes, isn't that common these days"
I'd never be so rude but other people think they can.
Just hit a nerve.

AmandaPayne Fri 18-Jan-13 22:24:32

I have one of the 70s 'standard' middle names. DD1 has one of the ones on your list. I don't care, and I don't expect her to either.

I think people getting very sniffy about common middle names which have 'no meaning' and are 'dull' and 'pointless' is, well, a bit odd. It was a name I had loved my whole life and I didn't use it as a first name in big part because it had become so popular. I don't see any law that middle names 'must' have meaning, or must honour someone. That seems to me just snobbish. It's a nice name, I liked it, I used it. It's only a middle name for goodness sake.

Anonymumous Fri 18-Jan-13 23:01:14

Blimey, I must be REALLY snobbish then - I've got three DC and the one thing I insisted on when picking their names (firsts and middles) was that they had a proper and lovely meaning. It was a great way to weed out 95% of the names I previously thought I liked. And I hope that even if they grow up to hate their names, they will at least appreciate the sentiment behind them. (My Mum's answer of "Oh, I just liked it" always seemed so wet and dopey - I wanted my children to feel as if I'd made a bit more of an effort for them.)

My middle name is Grace. It's not a name I'm particularly keen on, because it sounds too much like Grease. BUT... it was my Grandma's middle name and she died before I was born, so I like it because it has a real meaning for my Dad and my family. I understand why I have that name. It's my first name I have an issue with - the one that is boring to write, boring to say, has a meaningless meaning, and not even any family connections to redeem it.

So there you go. It's not snobbish - my preferences have merely been coloured by being unduly bothered about having a meaningless, pointless name myself!

AmandaPayne Sat 19-Jan-13 07:53:55

I didn't say it was snobbish to choose names with meaning, I said it was snobbish to get sniffy about common middle names. I am fine with people choosing to do something themselves, it's the idea that they are somehow superior to people who don't that I have trouble with. I don't think that there is a moral hierarchy of how you choose a name.

ErikNorseman Sat 19-Jan-13 09:33:15

They are just a bit overused, which makes them not very interesting choices. Plus the double barrelling trend is just heinous and has poisoned Grace, Rose and Mae by association IMO.

ErikNorseman Sat 19-Jan-13 09:34:56

I think middle names are pointless unless they nod to a loved and/or dead relative anyway. Mine is Louise, so blah. I hear Louise, I don't identify it with myself in any way.

twinklestar2 Sat 19-Jan-13 20:29:35

Agree with eriknorseman's post of 09.33

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