If you decided on an unusual name did you every regret it?

(92 Posts)
Brugmansia Tue 13-Nov-12 08:27:22

DP and I are currently deciding on names and the ones we like are all on the less-used/unusual end of the scale, particularly the boys short-list.

We really like them and they're also the only ones we can agree on, and in general I feel we should just go with what we like. There's a bit of me niggling away though that's worried about both other people's reactions and whether it could be a bit of a burden for DC in the future.

Just wondering on other people's thoughts who've chosen unusual names for their children.

dysfunctionalme Tue 13-Nov-12 08:46:02

I think you need to tell us the name

It depends what you mean by unusual? DD's name is uncommon, but still 'normal' and gets loads of compliments.

feetheart Tue 13-Nov-12 08:56:45

We used a very underused name for DD(9) and have only found one other little girl with that name in nearly 10 years (and on here, not in RL) A few old ladies though.
DD is quiet and shy and really doesn't like to be the centre of attention at all but she LOVES having a name that no-one else has.
For DS(7) we opted for another slightly unusual name though it is more often used as a nickname for other, longer names. I LOVE the short his version smile He seems to like his name but has played around with different names since he was talking!

I would say if you love it go for it though be prepared for interfering relatives to comment smile

shadowland Tue 13-Nov-12 08:59:48

Hmm...we had an unusual name in mind for DD1 before she was born 30 odd years ago, but did not use it. I was speaking with DD2 in a conversation about names recently and mentioned the unusual one we had thought of and she was horrified! Could not believe we had even considered it.
I think we had thought of how the child would feel, growing up with an unusual name - could they carry it off? would they feel self conscious?...and had decided against it, just in case. And I think we made the right decision -we are very different people now from when DD1 was born (basically we are out of the earthy, vaguely hippy phase!).

seeker Tue 13-Nov-12 09:02:20

My brother's step children had "unique" names. Their parents never regretted it, but the children did, and all three, one after the other, refused to go to secondary school unless they were allowed to change their names.

They were never bullied- I don't think children are bullied for their names, unless it's a rude word or something- but, as the eldest put it "it's just so tiring having to explain every single time."

CombustionEngine Tue 13-Nov-12 09:04:42

ds1 has a very unusual name, he's 8 and we don't regret it, we love the name and it suits him. There are always comments on it, usually where is it from and that it's quite nice, and he loves having a name no-one else has. But we did give him a regular middle name so if he ever hates it he can go to that.

I must say, now we have ds2 with a common name it's quite nice saying a name and not having to get into a conversation about it. But such is life!

amazingmumof6 Tue 13-Nov-12 09:28:39

yes please tell us the names, they may nob as unusual as you think!

we named our 4th Noah which was very unusual at the time, but the name is getting quite popular

on the other had we have a Michael as DS3 first name, he is inyear 5 and I've not come across another Michael his age so far!

Same with David which is DS1 middle name and Elizabeth DD, although she's only 7 months old so there could be loads of them the same age, but won't know till this years statistics come out!
(people may have chosen it more frequently as a result of Jubilee hype/respect of Queen Elizabeth II - which was not our reason, although I don't mind the assumption.
we chose Elizabeth Grace for a girl for first pregnancy, but had 5 boys and waited 12 years to get to use it!)

amazingmumof6 Tue 13-Nov-12 09:29:24

...may not be... sorry, not nob!

DinosaursOnASpaceship Tue 13-Nov-12 09:32:00

Ds3 has a lesser used named - you can't get it from a shop on a key ring, but it's a brilliant name and no one has problems spelling or pronouncing it (except occassionally they stick a K on the end or a Mc on the front for some reason). I've never heard of another child with his name, although recently I've seen it pop up on name threads on here.

Rachel130690 Tue 13-Nov-12 09:33:50

I called my ds (8 weeks) Herbie. It's a very uncommon and unusual name but I love it. Also everyone who has heard it has commented on how lovely it is.

dysfunctionalme Tue 13-Nov-12 09:56:38

Is it Phaedra?

Brugmansia Tue 13-Nov-12 10:25:03

Phaedra is not on the list.

I'm a bit reluctant to disclose them as I've been to DP that we keep them to ourselves. I would describe them as known, not used much either now or in the recent past although both oldish names.

For some reason I'm more worried about boys names. I'm not sure if this is just my perception buy there seems to be more general acceptance of unusual names for girls. Certainly among our friends all the boys seem to have pretty traditional names.

dreamingofsun Tue 13-Nov-12 10:43:42

our kids all have names that aren't in the top 50 but that are commonly known - though some of the spellings are different. still happy about these choices, though would have preferred one child's godparents not to have copied it for their child

FriggFRIGG Tue 13-Nov-12 10:44:37

Why dys what's wrong with Phaedra?! [Wink]

No,we've not regretted DS's unusual name,I love it more every time I say it.

I have,however,regretted DD's name,it is,again,unusual,though more well known...the difference being,I never loved it in the first place.

Their names are Arlo (DS) and Skye (DD)

sonniboo Tue 13-Nov-12 11:09:45

In my experience, having a less used name is a huge help in remembering a person's name. When I meet yet another (adult) Steve, Andy or Mike, I really struggle to remember their names. But a Winston, Linus or Darius stays in my brain much more easily. We sometimes forget why we name a person (or think), namely to identify him/her/it!

Or ds has a name that was used less than 20 times last year and he absolutely loves being the only one with his name in school and we get lots of compliments on it. DD's name, on the other hand, has become very popular and she is now one of 4 in her year group, which means she has to add her surname to all her work (and be known as littleXX or blondXX etc).

Brugmansia Tue 13-Nov-12 11:40:22

frigg, that may be part of the worry I'm having. I don't have any doubts with the potential girls names as I love them anyway. I've found it much harder to decide on any boys names I really like. (apologies anyone I offend) but I hate a lot of boys names that are popular, eg, Jack, Oliver, Ben etc.

There are a few boys names that are unusual but I'd probably feel more confident using as I really liked them. Unfortunately DP doesn't like them so the ones we're considering are more of a second choice for me but we both like them.

SquealyB Tue 13-Nov-12 11:41:22

I have an unusual name and generally I really like having an unusual name. The only thing that bothers me about it is having to spell it, and correct pronouciation but this is a small price to pay IMO. If at all possible, try and pick an usual name that is phoentically spelt (it does make life easier wink).

SquealyB Tue 13-Nov-12 11:42:21

ps. just notice you are the OP brugs <waves>

amazingmumof6 Tue 13-Nov-12 11:45:06

Brugmansia I understand you don't want people to put you off,

but I always discussed our names with other people, because I wouldn't have wanted to choose with a hidden negative meaning I didn't know about or something that could be teased as language/understanding/slang change
maybe it's because English is not my first language, but living permanently in the Uk with English husband I wanted names that are nice and easy to use, preferably with only one spelling known/common.

and I'm so glad I did ask around and didn't go for the following names(although I still love the sound of all!):

- Jezabel (thought it was a version of Izabel!)

- Lydia (I adore it, but DH says he knows people being teased coz it rhymes with chlamydia...I still love it, if we had a second daughter, I'd still want it, even if for a middle name)

- Isabell - stupid cyclistfgriend laughed and said " Is a bell neccesary on a bike?" totally ruined it for me, but I would have hated that joke made after naming DD

- Benedict - my 9 year old's reaction was "what? Bene Dick?

- Abigail - friend's daughter's been bullied and teased Abi-gay

- Lucas - rhymes with mucus apparently

- Stella - sometime it's a nickname for beer I was told

- Adam madam- I'm-Adam

- Fleur - can be pronounced to sound like floor

- and probably the worst of all Adolf! I couldn't help but liking the sound of it, despite the hugely negative historical association
(which of course I was aware of before coming to the UK and of course I despise the man responsible for the death of millions, so please don't lecture me on that, I'm certainly not inspired by him and would never name my child that name!)
I just liked how it could be shortened to Dolfie which sounds like dolphin, which I thought was sweet. that's all

some names can gain massive popularity over night (Scarlett and Tara after the publishing of "Gone with the Wind" just one example, Elvis another, which was practically unheard of previously and is suggested to be a family name for the Presleys) and equally totally fall out of use (such as Adolf, Herod for obvious reasons!).

you just can tell what's safe what's risky or what will be popular/unpopular by the time DC goes to nursery or university or reaches 60!

I wonder how many babies have been named Barack or Obama (first or middle) in the last 4 years!

(by the way if you have any of those name above, please understand that I'm not intending to hurt anyone's feelings, I'm just stating the reactions I've come across so far!)

flakjacket Tue 13-Nov-12 11:47:17

DS has an unusual name and the only problem we have come across is school. Every time he changes class the new teacher/teaching assistant has a problem. This year all his books have his name with an added 's' because that makes a word (although not a name). We have also had 'ic' added.

His name is unusual-ish but not unheard of and not made up!

amazingmumof6 Tue 13-Nov-12 11:48:07

Oh the most out there names I have come across were Cinnamon and Vanilla for a set of twin girls (?)
and Snake for a boy (definitely hate it)

MordionAgenos Tue 13-Nov-12 11:58:24

Both my daughters have uncommon names. DD1's name is a bit uncommon, in this country but not in Ireland, DD2's name is extremely uncommon everywhere. Both names are actually French in origin. DD1 hates her name but goes by a nickname which is WAY more unusual - its not because of the unusualness of her name that she hates it but because she was never called it when little. However she may be warming a bit to it now - she says it isn't 'her' but she will use it professionally when she grows up. She wouldn't change it to that extent.

I think it's a beautiful name. sad

DD2 adores her name, loves it being very unusual, and insists on everyone using the full version except for us and her sibs who are allowed to use the shortened pet name version.

It is a great name, I must admit.

My sister has a completely made up name. There appear to be 2 others in the whole world, both about 20 years younger than her, not known to us, we assume their parents heard her name somewhere and nicked it. She likes her name now, when she was younger, not so much. It has a very very common abbreviation though which she habitually used when she was younger.

Ecclesiazousae Tue 13-Nov-12 12:20:14

I think it depends entirely on the name/s. All 5 of my DC have Gaelic/Celtic names, though we actually live well outside of the area they originate from. DS1 and DS3 don't tend to have as many problems because their names, whilst very unusual when we picked them, have actually become recognisable and quite trendy outside of Scotland in recent years. So depending on the names you've picked, something which is unusual now might not be so in 5 years time, especially if it's already a name which has gained a little bit of popularity in trendy circles. Oldish names have also made quite a resurgence in the past decade, so it might not be as much of a 'burden' as you worry.

However, particularly when it comes to DD and DS4, I do wish we'd considered the implications of using very culturally/linguistically specific names. DS4's name (Arran) has been criticised as 'chavvy' because some people perceive it to be a mis-spelling of Aaron, and whilst it's obviously incredibly small-minded to think this way or make judgements about a child based on little more than their name, I do worry that it affects his life. It's always being written down as Aaron - and often even when we/he say that it's actually "like the Scottish island", people still stare blankly!
Likewise, it's very rare for anyone to be able to spell, pronounce or put the spoken and written versions together of DD's name (Mhairi - pronounced VAH-ree) and so I rather agree with seeker - it doesn't affect DH and I so much but it's tiring and an utter pain in the arse for DD and DS4 to have to explain over and over how their names are spelled and pronounced, that no they aren't made-up, that Irish is a close guess but we're actually Scottish and so on.

I have an unusual name and often wonder wtf my mother was thinking. Especially as my entire family shorten it so than my name sounds like a grunt. Thanks, honest hmm. In fact, I half married DH because he never, ever shortens my name <only half joking>.

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Tue 13-Nov-12 12:28:39

My son has an uncommon name. I dont regret it.

It's a name we liked so he got it. It's similiar to callum.

seeker Tue 13-Nov-12 12:32:46

I am always amused that people justify really "out there" names by saying it's the only way to avoid being one of 4 in a class. I have a Patrick and he has only just, now he's in year 7 met another one anywhere near his age. His friend John has met grown ups and a baby, but no other child. I could come up with 10 perfectly ordinary names which I could pretty much guarantee would make them the only ones in the class.

sonniboo Tue 13-Nov-12 12:34:15

ANY name can be teased. Will becomes Willy, Ellie becomes Smellie, Gabriel becomes Gayboy etc etc. But in my opinion a child is rarely teased because of his/her names - kids are pretty accepting of different names. Children are teased due to their character and the teaser WILL find something to tease regardless of name.

In other words, I would not worry so much about teasing potential in regards to names. I would choose a name you love, that sound good with your surname and that, ideally, isn't already used by thousands of others!

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Tue 13-Nov-12 12:35:51

My name is a common name that rhymes with jelly, belly, smelly etc.

Doesn't matter what you name a child there will be a way of using it to tease.

MordionAgenos Tue 13-Nov-12 12:43:52

Patrick isn't a usual name these days though, even among my lot (Catholics) grin My DS has a solid bible name and he was one of 5 in his year at primary school, 3 in his actual class, and more than 10 in the school as a whole. It was fine. It's one of those names capable of lots of different short-forms and the boys all found their preferred option. At secondary school, there are two in his tutor group and again, many more in the year (including the other 4 from the primary school). He's fine with it. His name really suits him.He wouldn't like an unusual name like his sisters have.

I know about 10 Davids. All of them through work. None of them mind having what was clearly a pretty usual name 45-50 years ago. grin

rachel234 Tue 13-Nov-12 12:48:04

I know about 10 Steves and 15 Andys and, whilst they may not mind, I do. It gets confusing and annyong to have to add a surname or other modifier.

Also, depending on what area you work in, it can be handy to be found/identified easily (e.g. on the internet), which is going to be hard if you are one of 1000s Steve Joneses or Andy Smiths.

Our ds has an unusual name (used about 15 times last year) and he and us love it!

seeker Tue 13-Nov-12 12:48:24

As I said earlier I don't think children are teased much for their names, unless they are something no sensible person would choose- Roger, or Willy or Minnie or Fanny or something. It's just that it's, as my step nephew said ( as he changed his name to Tom!) really tiring to have to keep explaining.

HecatePropylaea Tue 13-Nov-12 12:50:05

Nope. My children have got very unusual names and I love them. Many people have never heard of them before. They go nicely with our lovely forrin grin surname.

Startail Tue 13-Nov-12 12:52:32

The main problem with unusual names is absolutely everyone who overhears knows who you are talking about.

Both DDs have lovely friends with very memorable names, so the most innocent things cant be discussed in public because of the chance that someone will know them in our small town.

rachel234 Tue 13-Nov-12 12:59:46

"The main problem with unusual names is absolutely everyone who overhears knows who you are talking about."

Isn't that excactly the purpose of a name - to IDENTIFY a person!

Brugmansia Tue 13-Nov-12 13:05:29

Hello squealy

I'm not deliberately looking for an unusual or little used name or concerned about the child being the only one. I think fundamentally I don't like most male names enough to consider using them.

I'm not particularly worried about teasing - London is so diverse there's bound to be a huge range of names among their contemporaries. It's probably other adults' reactions that bother me more.

tammytoby Tue 13-Nov-12 13:08:10

I have an unusual name and have always loved being the only one with it at school, at work and amongst my friends. It is a beautiful, classic but rare name and it also doesn't 'date' me as it was never trendy.

I agree that the purpose of giving our children a name is so that they can be identified (ideally without adding an initial or other adjective!).

Startail, are you being ironic? Would you rather we all be called similar names so that no-one would know whe you're talking about grin?!

SquealyB Tue 13-Nov-12 13:17:02

Thing is, other people will have an opinion on everything aspect of your child rearing from naming, to feeding, to schooling etc. If it is right for you and DP (sounds like it is) then you should call your DCs what you want to. London is very diverse for names and there are very few names that would be roundly criticised but no doubt everyone will have an opinion.

The good (ish) news is that if you don't tell anyone pre-birth when you introduce the baby most people (usually with the exception of family wink)will be too polite to be critical even if they don't like your name choice. AND hilst they may say something behind your back they are unlikley to say it to your face.

The only person you will really need to "justify" it to is DC themselves.

InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream Tue 13-Nov-12 13:17:13

I want to know all these unusual names now grin

HecatePropylaea Tue 13-Nov-12 13:20:21

PMed you.

shhhhh. Sworn to secrecy grin

lljkk Tue 13-Nov-12 13:23:40

Unless it's an outright bizarre name, You should stop caring what other people think. Go with what you love.

DS2 is Tristan. It gets spelled wrong often or confused with Tristram. He gets called Dustin, Justin, Christian, Kris. He had speech delay & couldn't say his own name properly for long time. Like most unusual names, it doesn't have as nice NNs as the common choices.

DS2 has quite a... er, colourful personality, so stands out in a crowd anyway.

So sometimes I wish I had just called him Steve or Oliver.

DS3 has arguably the most common boy name of the last 60 years.

surfingbabies Tue 13-Nov-12 13:36:28

My sister and I have unusual names, my 3 DCs have names I've never heard of and I've never regretted any of them.......I still love them today and they are 11 and 8 yr old twins. They all suit their names and get complimented on them, some people chose to be rude but I have to say not many.....my DP sister was a little rude about them but I don't like her boys names as they are common and wouldnt suit my family so I don't really care what she thinks! If I'm honest people have opinions on absolutely everything, my DS gets nagged all the time by his elders for having long hair but in school he's cool so as long as he's happy then I'm happy!! We are expecting number 4 soon and we have picked a very unusual name that we've never heard of before smile
As long as your happy with it then go with it, if you care what people think then go for something common otherwise you'll never be able to settle with it! Good luck smile

rempy Tue 13-Nov-12 13:38:23

I think the thing that really requires thought is can the name carry to adulthood? It's less of a problem with boys names, but lots of girls names are "cute" for a baby, or girl, but will sound really childish as they age - pixie, tilly, trixie, etc etc. And whilst the child may be happy to constantly challenge expectations, I would raise an eyebrow if I was allocated a defence lawyer called daisy-doo-da (although I have an unusual name, and try to remain concious that it is a reflection of my parents tastes, not mine!)

Given that you are trying to find an unusual name suggests that the name will not be that unusual in the group you socialise with.

Read Freakonomics about naming phenomenons, the filtering down of names from higher to lower socio-economic groups, and the perception of names on acheivement. Interesting.

And search for the boy called Bear on here, if you want a warning about judgy-pants opinions about childrens names. Yes. Bear. That's on his birth certificate.

CinnabarRed Tue 13-Nov-12 13:40:04

My very best friend at primary school was called Phaedra. We were thick as thieves until sent to different secondary schools. I often wonder what happened to her.

surfingbabies Tue 13-Nov-12 13:41:13

It's also very handy as when they are being told off or talked about we know its them! Also putting their names in things, they never get mixed up with others! When my eldest started big school her friends tried to shorten her name and she said she preferred to be called by her full name so she must like it, she is shy and quiet too so you'd think having an unusual name would haunt her but it doesn't!

Brugmansia Tue 13-Nov-12 13:42:04

My mum will probably comment. She was probing about names the other week and then telling anecdotes about her friends who thought their grandchildren's names were too outlandish.

When she was pregnant with my sister though they changed their mind about using a name they liked if they'd had a boy because of my aunt's comments. The name in question was unusual at the time but had become pretty popular now though.

SquealyB Tue 13-Nov-12 13:56:57

Also a word of warning on compromising........

I was originally Helen on my birth cert. as my mum listened to other people's comments on calling me something unsual (which was in fact is her maiden name). Fast forward two months and she has me at home is is only calling me by unusual name and has come to hate Helen (sorry any Helens/people with DDs named Helen) so had to go and plead to be allowed to put it on my birth certificate. They conceeded but only allowed her to put it in front of existing name without changing paperwork, so I now have an unusal first name and EXTRA long name as I now have three middle names grin.

This is a heart over head issue and perhaps your mum won't love your name choice but she will get used to it.

surfingbabies Tue 13-Nov-12 14:12:31

I like the name Bear smile

Chandon Tue 13-Nov-12 14:20:46

if you care about what other people think a lot, then CHOOSE a name that other people like a lot.

If you don't care, then you are free to do what you want.

seeker Tue 13-Nov-12 14:22:22

But do remember that you are naming an unconsenting adult.

SchroSawMummyRidingSantaClaus Tue 13-Nov-12 14:24:49

I chose a name that isn't unusual but I get hmm looks for the spelling of it. I don't regret the name but feel like punching every person that gives me a cats bum mouth from their ignorance.

I have a properly unusual name and my Mother should be shot for it.

ProcrastinatingPanda Tue 13-Nov-12 14:27:09

DS has an unusual name, he's almost 6 now and I don't regret it at all, I still love it and he is always being complemented on it.

smable Tue 13-Nov-12 14:29:55

Dh convinced me not to give ds2 the name i really wanted he is now 10 months and i regret it everyday, even dh admits that it was unfair to think about other peoples opinions before mine. There is a difference between a name that could cause your child problems and a name that just isn't very popular, try not to make a choice you will regret whichever way you go.

Brugmansia Tue 13-Nov-12 14:31:25

But choosing for an adult who can't consent equally applies to a boring popular name.

I agree with the point about some girls names maybe not being ideal for an adult. In general though my feeling is that trends in men's names are more conservative.

Welovecouscous Tue 13-Nov-12 14:37:19

My DH has a very unusual name and hates it sad lots of playground teasing and as an adult he gets asked to repeat it, spell it and explain it every time he gives his name... Restaurants/ hairdressers/drs etc etc

seeker Tue 13-Nov-12 14:38:37

There is a middle ground between giving the world another Connor or Callum and calling your child Dayspring or Zowie.

FellatioNelson Tue 13-Nov-12 14:39:52

One of my DS's has a try unusual name. He is 13 and we have never met another one, and there are only two people (including him!) on fb with his name. I think a few babies have it now, but it is still well outside the top 100.

I still really love it, and lots of people comment on it and say they love it, but then people don't usually volunteer to tell you that they hate your child's name! It has been mentioned a couple of times (not by me) on MN and has received a very mixed response which is exactly as I would expect to be honest.

You can't please all the people all the time, and I can live with people hating it - the fact that he is the one and only X that any of us know, and no-one ever says 'X who?' when he is mentioned is good enough for me!

FellatioNelson Tue 13-Nov-12 14:40:10

very not try confused

DS2 has an Irish name that no one knows how to spell - there are different versions and we seem to have gone for the most complicated version! I have at times wondered if it was the right decision, but it totally suits him!!

I had an Irish mother, although am totally English myself. Little F (think sharkey) can actually spell his name (and corrected his teacher in first term of Reception!) and is very proud of his Irish origins (has only been there twice!)

We had a few hmm looks initially, but as I say, he has made it his own, and no one has commented for a long time.

Coffeeformeplease Tue 13-Nov-12 15:03:09

Hi OP, We really struggled to name our first daughter, and chose an unusual name in the end, there was no one with that name in her primary and there is one other girl in her secondary school with that name.
My son has a Finnish version of a classic name, yes, he has to spell it, but he loves his name. I know only Finnish people with that name (no, we're not Finnish, but foreign smile).
My Youngest daughter has a classic name which we abbreviate to something two-syllable, there is no other child in pre-school with that name.
All children have (more main-stream) middle names they can revert to when they are fed up, but I doubt they ever will be.
You choose the name for your child. We would never ever have discussed the names with anyone. We got comments from my MIL, but then she dislikes almost any name and has recently badly affronted her own daughter by rudely commenting on the name of her first child.
You cannot please everyone, as everyone's taste is not yours!
Think ahead, will the child likely to be uncomfortable to be addressed with her/his name in public in 30 years' time? Then think again, otherwise, go with your gut feeling, or you will regret it.

honeytea Tue 13-Nov-12 15:35:40

I have a very common name (Amy) I hate being one of many Amys.

We have 98% decided on our unborn son's name, we are going to call him Elvin, 8 babies were called Elvin in the UK in 2011 and 119 were called Elvin in Sweden (we live in Sweden) when our family and friends look a little supprised we just say "oh its an English/Swedish (delete as appropriate) name" and they don't mention it again.

Hello Brug smile

I think it depends on the name and exactly how uncommon it is. I don't like made-up names, or ones which sound like they were picked just to be unusual.

On the other hand, I'd prefer to use a known but less common name rather than give the world another Jack or Harry or Oliver.

I've refused to tell my parents my name choices - if they ask I tell them Wayne for a boy, Waynetta for a girl (apologies to any Waynes or Waynettas out there!)

comeonbishbosh Tue 13-Nov-12 16:13:43

I think it also depends on your surname. I have a fairly common name for my generation (though there was only 1 stage in my life, 6th form, when there were enough others around to need additional nicknames to identify). But, I have a damn fine unusual surname. So if you google me, there's only me there. And I like that.

My DD has my DH's surname, which is a moderately well used surname. That was one of the factors in going for a more unusual first name for her.

As seeker says, there's a middle ground between Connor and Zowie. But generally the worry about 'what over people think' diminishes as you get used to being a parent... and realise that whether or not you breastfeed / let your children stand on chairs in restaurants / stay up late / walk on the pavement without holding your hand... are all ongoing 'fair game' for public approval or condemnation. So many things that people will agree with you on, or not. So you learn to thicken your skin a little. Enjoy calling your child a name you love!

WhatEverItIsIDidntDoIt Tue 13-Nov-12 16:41:44

My son has an unusual name and people have some outrageous reactions that used to make me angry and sad but now I realise it is their problem not mine I love my sons name and it suits him perfectly!

Brugmansia Tue 13-Nov-12 17:06:46

Hello mrsbugsy

I don't like made up names either, definitely not thinking asking those lines. I guess one of my concerns is that some people may wrongly see the names as having been picked for the sake of being different or dismiss them as pretentious.

MoelFammau Tue 13-Nov-12 23:43:43

My name is unusual. As in, I'm the only one on Google :-) It's not a made-up name, it's Welsh but not one of the obvious ones. And yes, I'm Welsh.

I LOVE my name. I don't think I could pull off a Sarah or Louise type name at all and am happy I was given something outside the box.

I desperately wanted (and still do want) Phlox for my daughter's name but it was ridiculed no end by DH's rather boring family. Except his cool sister, who loved it too... Still wish I'd ignored the lot of them.

Clary Wed 14-Nov-12 00:23:46

DD's name is often said on MN to be uber-trendy but in fact we have barely ever met another and she is certainly the only one in her 1000-pupil school.

I think she really likes it. DS1 also has a less common name (again the only one in school tho there is another in yr 3) and he is certainly keen on the fact that he is the only one.

But I should add that neither name is unusual in the sense of made up or unheard of; just not commonly used when they were born (think WW1) - so people don't tend to raise eyebrows, I have never had anyone ask how to spell it, they just say it's their grandad's name grin.

I agree seeker, there is a place between Callum and Zowie.

A friend of mine called Sarah always gives you her full name when she rings up - clearly out of habit from being one of many Sarahs. I never have to give my full name as I am the only one most people know. I was unreasonably annoyed last year to discover that on my teaching course there was another one and I was suddenly Clary B, grrrr

ProfYaffle Wed 14-Nov-12 00:35:24

My dd's have unusual names, haven't experienced any problems so far.

On the flip side I have a very common name which attracts a great deal of wearying attention and teasing in itself.

Maybe we just have to accept that there are no perfect names and all of them have potential for grief somewhere down the line.

Fuck it.

Just choose one you like.

SugarMeFingers Wed 14-Nov-12 16:11:34

I've never met anyone with the same name as my DS, it is also similar to Callum, but not. Wondering if it the same as InSPsFanjoNoOneHearsYouScream 's DS

SugarMeFingers Wed 14-Nov-12 16:12:37

ooops, i also love it and do not regret it. grin

LemonBreeland Wed 14-Nov-12 16:20:02

I have one DC with an unusual name and two with popular names. I regret the popular names much more and am annoyed at DH for talking me into them grin

DC2 has an unusual name and I still adore it 5 years on.

DC3 has a top ten name. I find myself really wishing she didn't have that name.

missingmymarbles Wed 14-Nov-12 16:34:05

Think it depends on the name doesn't it?
DD1 has a very unusual name and I love it. I saw DD2's name years ago and have loved it since; it has now become really popular apparently, although we don't know any others. She's only a few months but I do love it.
I have a very unusual name and don't like it so much, but not because its unusual, just because I am not do keen...

jeanvaljean Wed 14-Nov-12 18:46:46

As someone with a very boring, inelegant name, I would have loved to have had an unusual name. I think it's true that kids will be bullied for anything so calling them something outlandish will not compound this. If anything I think the unusually named kids get 'cred' in later years from their peers.

I also wish all those in the thread would reveal their unusual names!

Journey Wed 14-Nov-12 18:57:39

My dcs love their unusual names.

I find it funny when people think that less common used names which everybody knows about are unusual. To me a name that is known (whether it is in frequent use or not) is not an usual name.

Different spellings of names to make them different doesn't make them unusual.

Go for the name you love whether it is common or unusual and you'll never regret it.

Journey Wed 14-Nov-12 19:00:11

..not an unusual name!

seeker Wed 14-Nov-12 21:02:37

I just think it's extraordinary that people say things lik "my children have very unusual names, and I've never had any trouble" or "I've developed a thick skin" or "ii love the name so it's all right"

It's not you that has to spend 80 years explaining your name to everyone you meet! If only people would remember that their child is going to grow up and have their own life....

seeker Wed 14-Nov-12 21:04:28

"If anything I think the unusually named kids get 'cred' in later years from their peers."

Not in my experience.

discrete Wed 14-Nov-12 21:06:27

Well, I was given a very bog standard name...for the country I was born in.

Unfortunately it was not bog standard and all but unpronounceable in the countries I spent much of my life in.

I have given my dc names that are easy to pronounce in many languages, while still being vaguely of an ethnicity coherent with us. They are unusual in many countries, but at least they don't get mangled quite as badly as mine did!

Many bog standard English names are impossible in other languages.

EdgarAllanPond Wed 14-Nov-12 21:10:36

one of the 'ard' girls in my school had an unusual name. no-one bullied her in school.

bullying will look for something to focus on - if not your name then something else, if you are the target. if you are the perpetrator it doesn't matter how daft your name is - it won't focus on you.

i think now more people are moving away from the standard run of names anyway, who is to say what will be unusual in a few years time. i like to think people are more tolerant of difference in appearance and names than used to be the case though i am probably wrong

LemonBreeland Wed 14-Nov-12 21:27:16

discrete. That is quite an important point that people need to take into consideration.

I have two cousins who moved to Sweden when they were young. There names are Johnathan and Timothy. Timothy, not too bad but Jonathan became Yownatan, he later moved to Spain, another country where his name is impossoble. However he has a perfectly acceptable normal name in England.

MoelFammau Wed 14-Nov-12 21:30:12

I get 'cred'. I'm memorable, me. So I get a lot of work (freelancer relying on word of mouth). I was born with a very dull name (Kate) but my Dad hated it and gave me a funkier name when I was 2 or 3. And I love it. It's not unique, it's an old Welsh name.

ReindeerBollocks Thu 15-Nov-12 00:15:55

I want the name Caoimhe for DC3 (if it's a girl). Problem is that having had an unusual name I wouldn't want to burden one of my children with an odd name.

I don't mind it as much now, but I longed to be a Samantha when I was little, a Samantha with a headband that hand my name on it. My mum very kindly got me a fridge magnet that had a cute rhyme about having a special and rare name. It didn't help.

I've still to meet another person with my name.

Brugmansia Thu 15-Nov-12 08:05:45

journey, I agree about well name but not currently popular names not being unusual. It is interesting though getting an idea of what different people consider unusual.

I've just been browsing through last years 1000 most used boys'names. It's interesting comparing some lower down the rankings. For example Ezra and Jeremy are both around 450. I'd say Ezra is unusual, being known and in use for a long time but as far as I know never used much. Jeremy on the otherhand I don't think at all unusual. There are lots of adults with the name it's just unpopular at the moment. Others though may see both out neither as unusual.

(incidentally Ezra isn't the current name in question but one I really like that DP vetoed)

AndFanjoWasHisNameO Thu 15-Nov-12 14:40:02

angry aaargh, my head is about to explode with needing to know all of these wonderful names....

ResponsibleAdult Thu 15-Nov-12 23:02:33

I read with interest, although way past baby naming stage. Thought long and hard about baby names. Any suggestion over ruled by DH because of his prejudice from university. I loved all these names, except perhaps the Quintus variations. See below HIS prejudice:

Lily, Ivy, Rosie, Lottie all too 19th century??!!!!
Lucy dismissed as "loose elastic", Sophie, " soapy ###^^^^"
Chloe, too perfume.
Tess, too Hardy.
Quentin, Quintus, Quinn, all dismissed, slang, not going there.
Any name that could be shortened to a unisex dismissed, no Alex, no Charlie, no reason given.
I wanted easy to write letters, so teacher didn't dismiss child as struggling to grasp alphabet in reception. Three letter names both of them.
Friends had Zin, no one questions, entirely brilliant, totally suits, phonetically spelt. Other friends had Xander, now quite common apparently, slightly unusual at the time.
I reckon there could be a backlash. Susan, John, Anne, Peter, Betty, Paul. You mark my words ; ). Xxx

ResponsibleAdult Thu 15-Nov-12 23:21:10

I read with interest, although way past baby naming stage. Thought long and hard about baby names. Any suggestion over ruled by DH because of his prejudice from university. I loved all these names, except perhaps the Quintus variations. See below HIS prejudice:

Lily, Ivy, Rosie, Lottie all too 19th century??!!!!
Lucy dismissed as "loose elastic", Sophie, " soapy ###^^^^"
Chloe, too perfume.
Tess, too Hardy.
Polly put the kettle on.
Jack the Ripper
Arthur and Camelot.
Merlin, Marley, Morpheus, too sci fi
Moses, Isaac too Old Testament
Quentin, Quintus, Quinn, all dismissed, slang, not going there.
Any name that could be shortened to a unisex dismissed, no Alex, no Charlie, no reason given.
I wanted easy to write letters, so teacher didn't dismiss child as struggling to grasp alphabet in reception. Two or three letter names both of them. Ours are called Id and Ego, no just joking!
Friends had Zin, no one questions, entirely brilliant, totally suits, phonetically spelt. Other friends had Xander, now quite common apparently, slightly unusual at the time.
I reckon there could be a backlash. Susan, John, Anne, Peter, Timmy, omg, it is Famous Five. Anyone for Enid? . You mark my words ; ). Xxx

aufaniae Thu 15-Nov-12 23:29:31

DS has an unusual name, I have never regretted it, not for a second. It was a name we thought hard about and chose as we love it. We still love it!

Love Ezra btw.

MrsEasingwood Fri 16-Nov-12 15:31:09

i think that you're right to wonder whether giving your child an unusual name is the right thing to do or not, I have a perfectly ordinary name but it's spelt differently and I get so incredibly bored of people asking me where the spelling comes from? how it's pronounced? what an unusual name etc.
My advice would be would the name be to look at the name very critically from an outside perspective, do you think it will reflect badly when Dc goes for a job interview? will the name sound ok if DC wanted to be a lawyer? Doctor? Teacher?
How will it sound on their weddingday?etc

selte Sat 17-Nov-12 09:57:26

I consider my name unusual - I've never net another, registration stats show between 0 and 8 people registered with my name annually. But it's easy to spell, easy to say, and there are no issues working out the pronunciation from seeing it written down.

The name I chose for DS is similar - occasionally appearing in registration statistics, but never more than half a dozen a year, easy to spell and say. I love it, no regrets. We originally were going to go with something more mainstream but after announcing the original choice to family we realised it was wrong.

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Sat 17-Nov-12 10:06:42

discrete "whilst vaguely being of an ethnicity coherent with us" LOVE your turn of phrase!

Conanchensee Sat 17-Nov-12 16:21:33

I'd reiterate other people who've said the names you think are unusual might not turn out to be. We were really surprised when we had dc1 3 years ago what the latest names trends were. I was thought my husband's choices, Freddy and Alfie, were completely out there but they're actually amongst the most popular. Names that I thought were bog standard, David, Stephen, Ben now seem to be quite out of fashion and toddler groups round here are heaving with the likes of Herbert, Algie, Elsie, Hugo and Evelyn. I think anything goes nowadays-except Gavin or Sheila, I think they would be considered truly unusual for a newborn!

Conanchensee Sat 17-Nov-12 16:22:19

PS I know two baby/toddler Enids!

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