chosen popular name

(56 Posts)
blondie72 Thu 14-Jun-12 13:44:31

My daughter is 3.5 and we chose a really popular name for her and I regret it every day. My husband thinks I'm mad but It's driving me crazy. Anyone else feel the same? Is there anything I can do?

squoosh Thu 14-Jun-12 13:48:11

You chose the name because you liked the name. Presumably you still like the name, you just don't like the fact lots of other girls share her name?

Try to remember why you chose it in the first place and focus on that. Or come up with a cool nickname.

Surely after 3.5 years (?) the name becomes kind of irrelevant, it just becomes part of the person. No?

squoosh Thu 14-Jun-12 13:48:50

But if it's only 3.5 weeks, just change her name. No biggie.

3boysgirlontheway Thu 14-Jun-12 13:54:24

Is it Ava/Eva/Eve?

That is the only name I think I would regret, no idea why, but, it just popped into my head. If it is that I don't think you are mad!

nizlopi Thu 14-Jun-12 14:01:18

I wouldn't change it now. If when she's older, she doesn't like it and wants to change it then thats her call, but its the name you chose and the name she knows now, so changing it would be a bit selfish on your part and confusing on hers.

WhereMyMilk Thu 14-Jun-12 14:03:31

DD is now 8. At the time, her name was not common popular. Now it is.

I do wish we'd gone for name 2nd on our list now, BUT her name is her name. I do still like it and it suits her. I just wish no one else had used it grin

Lunarlyte Thu 14-Jun-12 14:18:45

DD1's name is very popular (though not as popular when she was born in 2009 as it is now) and DD2s name is becoming increasingly popular.

I used to have quite snobby views about how awful it would be to bestow a popular name, but do you know what? I couldn't give a flying f*ck now because we chose our daughters names because we genuinely like/d the names and they have significant meanings to us. A Squoosh quite rightly said, your little girl's personality should have usurped the quite base 'is it popular?' quandry and Nizlopi is right to say that it would be selfish of you/confusing for her to change it now.

Let it go and just give her a cool NN or call her by her middle name. Better still, just call her by her given name and don't give her a complex about it, because at 3.5 she'll be picking up on the tiniest bits of crap you project her way.

I apologise if I sound harsh here.

Lannie33 Thu 14-Jun-12 15:17:36

If she's 3.5 weeks, change her name or go by middle name. If she's 3.5 years then give. Having said this, my aunt adopted her daughter at the age of 2.5y and gave her an Estonian name (she had been given a Canadian/English name by her birth mother) and it seems it was never an issue.....
I totally sympathize as I'm having the hardest time deciding on my daughter's name....one of the names is kind of popular and I really don't want her to be one of 2 or 3 in her class (not sure why I hate the idea of this so much...I just do!!). Maybe if you tell us her names we can help think of nicknames?

Lannie33 Thu 14-Jun-12 15:18:38

Oops..i meant if she's 3.5 years then give her a cool nn or (or use middle name).

Lannie33 Thu 14-Jun-12 15:19:57

PS my husband also thinks i'm crazy b/c of my indecisiveness. Men just don't understand!!!

Frontpaw Thu 14-Jun-12 15:27:50

Is it a fairly common name or did you name her something that has become common over the past few years (so Jane or Lily?). As long as its not Jordan, we'll forgive you.

boyfallingoutofthesky Thu 14-Jun-12 21:08:30

Hi, I understand how you feel as my daughter, aged three, also has a name that has become much more popular since we named her. It does get to me sometimes but my partner thinks it is not an issue and says we (he) would have called her that regardless as it is the best name!

I know it is silly and cannot explain why exactly it bothers me, as she is very much her own person anyway, as someone has said, and even if a name is popular there are still probably less than 2 or even one percent of babies born with that name per year. In my case, I am a natural worrier and need something to focus my worry on and (as my partner has pointed out) this is what my brain chooses to fix on when there is nothing else to worry about (so actually I should be pretty happy!)

When it comes down to it, she is 3, she knows her name, it is her and it is too late to change it. Just try to remember all the very good reasons you chose that name in the first place.

rachel234 Thu 14-Jun-12 21:21:36

How old is she? If she is under age 1 then you can change it easily.

If she's older, how about you find a cool nickname?

bigbluebump Thu 14-Jun-12 21:42:33

Does she have a middle name that is less widely used?

peachypips Fri 15-Jun-12 19:42:06

Am mega curious now about name!

Hoti Fri 15-Jun-12 21:45:14

I don't think that popularity is a good reason to regret a name. You like it or you don't, do you regret it for any other reasons? Do you not like the name?

Lannie33 Sat 16-Jun-12 02:48:53

me too peachy!! the suspense is killing me!

misslinnet Sat 16-Jun-12 20:10:19

Maybe try and focus on what it was you liked about the name when you chose it - I'm hoping here you didn't choose it simply because you thought it was unpopular!

Or could you call her by a nickname? Like say Millie instead of Amelia for instance?

(and Frontpaw, Jane was a name I was considering for DS if he'd been a girl, and it was something like 1000 th most popular in 2010)

blondie72 Sun 17-Jun-12 18:04:08

Her name is Olivia, named after a friend at school. I didn't even know about popularity charts at the time. I think the issue with our choice is that it's so similar to Oliver so I'm forever meeting Olivias, Livvy's, Olivers and Ollies. It was nice to read boyfallingoutofthesky post. I think I must be the same.

MamaLazarou Sun 17-Jun-12 18:54:04

Does she like her name?

FormerlyTitledUntidy Sun 17-Jun-12 18:59:08

Oh Olivia is lovely. smile
I have an Eve who is seven so at the peak of popularity. Within her class there are 3 variations. It doesn't bother her at all. Sometimes I wish she had a more unusual name but the other names we liked are equally popular grin
It''ll just be one of those things, she has a popular name, so what?

JimbosJetSet Sun 17-Jun-12 19:02:39

Popular names are popular for a good reason - congratulate yourself that you chose a name that so many other people think is beautiful too! She has a classic name that will allow her to become who ever she wants to be in life - whether she chooses to be a rock star or a hair dresser or a Judge, it will suit her perfectly.

peachypips Sun 17-Jun-12 19:36:34

Olivia is lovely. Really beautiful. I have only met one baby down here called Olivia so it is not popular everywhere! X

Surf25 Sun 17-Jun-12 19:56:01

Olivia is a lovely name. I only know of two, and that's out of loads of wee ones across preschool ages.
Be confident in your choice and the reasons you chose it. I do understand, we picked a name for dd2 that wasn't ranked very highly on the charts (60's or therabouts i think, not top twenty but a slight variation on a name that has been very top ten for ages i think) when we chose it and we chose it because we loved it and its meaning. Ever since she was born i have been hearing of other wee girls with the same name and on another thread on here asking for the four most popular baby names in your local area it must be one of the most commonly appearing ones.
However, we chose it because we love it! And i guess the other parents did the same, there are worse things that could happen!! Your daughter is so much more than a name!

PixieCake Sun 17-Jun-12 20:19:11

Olivia is a beautiful name, but if you are worried about its popularity then maybe start to call her by a less common nickname (livvy, lia, viva)

You might find that once she starts school there actually aren't that many of them.

wigglesrock Sun 17-Jun-12 21:04:51

I am in danger of outing myself but here goes grin I have a 4 year old Olivia, she has just had her induction at primary school. Out of a huge intake of P1s she's the only Olivia, she was the only one in nursery school as well.

The popularity of the name doesn't bother me in the slightest, I picked it because I loved it when she was born, I know there are allegedly grin lots but I've yet to stumble across them. She gets Liv sometimes but not Livvy.

amieis Sun 17-Jun-12 22:08:22

my dd is olivia... She was born this year and if she'd been a boy sh'd have been oliver. We didn't know at the time it was the most popular name and now we know we don't care because we love the name! We hyphenate her first name as dp wanted her to be named after his aunt who sadly passed away when she was very young, but not directly (if that makes sense)
She sometimes gets shortened to livvy or liv, but me and dp usually end up just calling her vee
Olivia is a beautiful name and its irrelevant how many other people have the name because its your dds name and she's special... She might share a na$e with someone but it won't mean she's the same!

bradbourne Sun 17-Jun-12 22:19:24

I think Olivia is a lovely name.

It's not that common where I am - I'm pretty sure (99%) that there is no Olivia in ds's school of 200 pupils. There are, however, loads of children called Ava or Ella, or, for the boys, Charlie or Henry.

FWIW, I had a name that was unusual at the time I was growing up (although it is very popular with babies and toddlers at the moment and I always envied the children with a more popular name like Samantha or Sharon (of whom there were loads in my school).

As for what you could do... think of an unusual nickname. Use her midlle name, either alone or with Olivia - e.g. Olivia Rose.

WineOhWhy Sun 17-Jun-12 22:25:15

If you want to go the nn route and want to avoid the obvious ones, I know an Olivia who is known as Polly. Vivi might also work?

Buntingbunny Sun 17-Jun-12 22:26:04

Don't worry, they short it out when they start school etc.

We have a horde of Isabelles at ballet, they very quickly shared the various nn about and are very much individuals.

Anyway even relatively unusual names can cause trouble. High school suddenly realised Y7 had two "Julie Roberts". They were the only "Julies" in the whole school and they happened to have a moderately common local surname. Given the complete look of shock on the teachers face I'm not actually sure school realised there were two of them.

cece Sun 17-Jun-12 22:26:32

I work in a school - 250 kids. My DC are at school - 350 kids. Youngest DC is at Nursery - 30 kids.

I know a few Olivias but not that many really consideriing how many DC I know. Bear in mind DC also know children at cubs, Guides, netball, gym, rugby etc.. too.

Probably about 2 or 3 Olivias out of all those children.

Olivia may well be top of the popularity lists but that doesn't mean there are that many really!

yellowraincoat Sun 17-Jun-12 22:27:49

Not sure why it's such a big deal to choose a popular name. It's a name. Not that big a deal.

cece Sun 17-Jun-12 22:37:48

Actually I agree, having a popular name is no big deal. In fact they are popular for a reason - because they are a nice name!

In my own case I started out with a more unusual name for first DC (funnily enough it is now quite popular) and with each child chosen more and more popular names! LOL And I really don't care, as I love their name and I love them iyswim.

How about Lollie as a nn?
The boys top ten names covers tens of Thousands of boys. The girls top ten covers much much less.
We seem to use more variety of girls names than boys.
So even though it's top 5, there are a lot lot less than total of top 5 boys

winkle2 Sun 17-Jun-12 23:53:59

Lovely name.

I like the suggestion of Vivi as a nn.

Might steal this for my list!!

blondie72 Mon 18-Jun-12 13:40:15

Thank you all for your messages! I'm feeling much better now!! x

SingingSands Mon 18-Jun-12 13:49:18

Olivia is a lovely name, and even if she goes to school with 4 other Olivia's it doesn't matter. She isn't going to spend her entire life with those 4 others!

Where I work there are 4 Julies, 3 Sarahs, 4 Susans and 3 Laurens and 2 Charlottes - that's just my small department! I don't stress about other people having the same name as myself, I don't even think about it!

I have an 8 year old daughter with a popular name. I didn't know it was popular when I picked it because I didn't have much to do with other kids back then. My FIL rang up to tell me it was the most popular name in England for baby girls and had been for years. So what? Does every child have to have a unique name? How about we just award new babies a barcode and a reference number! Sorry, this is turning into a rant blush

hefner Tue 19-Jun-12 10:58:41

I agree Olivia is a lovely name and I don't think it matters that it is popular. It has loads of nice nn so even if your DD does end up in a class with another Olivia she will be able to use a different nn if she wants to. I gave my daughter a name that is apparently very common, although I haven't come across any others at baby groups or nursery so far. My DD's name is also loathed by mumset (apparently a drippy name, a dogs name, too cutesy for a grown woman and just a nn not a proper name) but I don't care! As long as you like the name and it suits your DD that's all that matters imo.

I am in my 50s. In my class of 30 at school there were 7 Catherines - all spelt differently and all with a different nickname and strangely we always knew which one was being referred to. My DD now has several friends called Kate/Katie.

What's in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet;

MarySA Tue 19-Jun-12 11:25:06

It's a really pretty name. And I only know of one Olivia and she's about 10 or 11. I wouldn't worry about it.

savoycabbage Tue 19-Jun-12 11:33:52

There are 438 children at my dd's primary school and only one Olivia.

ThisAintKansas Tue 19-Jun-12 17:49:21

Lots of names are popular because they are lovely. Olivia is one of them.

Btw, I think Olivia was re popular about 10 years ago. I dont know any little Olivias.

suburbandream Tue 19-Jun-12 17:57:07

My DS1 has a v.popular boys name and we didn't realise at the time - we didn't read any of the baby name charts/books, just chose it because we liked it. When we realised how popular it was, DH and I were both quite upset - there seems to be about one boy in every class at school with this name. I've come to like it again now, and the way I see it is that when he is out in the big wide world he'll be coming into contact with people from all places and with all ages, so he won't be surrounded by his namesakes IYSWIM. I grew up in the 70s and there were hundreds of Sharons and Traceys about but now I don't know any smile.

blondie72 Tue 19-Jun-12 20:29:52

Thank you for all your comments. I feel much better about it now. It's funny because we named DS Benjamin, another very popular name, but somehow that hasn't bothered me as much. My husband has a popular name for his age and we know lots of other men with the same name and he has said it has never bothered him. Like I said, he thinks I'm bonkers!

FriskyMare Tue 19-Jun-12 20:36:27

Love Liv like Liv Tyler!

wigglesrock Tue 19-Jun-12 20:42:03

blondie72 Oh both your childrens names are beautiful together. My husband always wanted Benjamin but 3 girls later he can just put that idea to rest grin

strawberryswing Tue 19-Jun-12 20:43:44

don't worry about it! she may love having a name that is popular, i know growing up i wished id had a name that wasn't so un-common. and its a beautiful name smile

IvanaNap Tue 19-Jun-12 20:47:34

Ben and Olivia were two of our top 5! Both timeless, both lovely smile

PetitRat Tue 19-Jun-12 20:51:10

But Olivia is such a lovely, timeless, classic name. I thought you were going to confess to calling her something very "now", very transient. You haven't - you've given her a beautiful name which just happens to be popular now - big difference.

kilmuir Tue 19-Jun-12 20:57:21

I have a 5 year old and a 4 year old, no Olivias in their classes. Beautiful name.

Bumpstart Sat 06-Oct-12 23:30:33

Bump

Bumpstart Sat 06-Oct-12 23:31:19

For daisy do

purplehouse Sat 06-Oct-12 23:39:00

Olivia is a lovely name. Doesn't matter if it's popular. Statistically even the top names on the list will only be used by something like 1 in 50 or 100 babies - not like it's 1 in 10.

Anyway remember why names are popular - people like them, lots of people like them because they are really, really nice names. I thought that Olivia was actually the very top of the list recently - that's because it's the BEST name !

Do not worry about this any more !

LauraPalmerPlusOne Sun 07-Oct-12 10:30:38

Vivi is an adorable nn for Olivia (which is a lovely name OP!)

sparklechops Sun 07-Oct-12 11:05:08

Olivia is a lovely name! Don't regret it. I have the opposite problem....regrets over an unusual name. Sometimes I wish we'd gone for one of the more popular ones on our list. Like you, OP, I am a chronic worrier and probably just need something to focus my thoughts on.

MJandherdog Sun 07-Oct-12 18:34:48

Olivia is an absolutely beautiful name! It isn't faddy, it's just popular because it's gorgeous. I like all of the associated nicknames too- Livi, Vivi, Oli...I really wouldn't worry x

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