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Dimitri/Dmitri and upsetting the family.

24 replies

PavlovtheForgetfulCat · 15/08/2009 17:46

DH has an older estranged brother. Long story, but there is tension around this brother, who is a half brother of DH with a greek father. His name is Dimitrius,

We actually really really really like the name Dimitri for a boy, and also Dimi as a nickname.

The family will not be impressed, it would probably hurt them for reasons not easily explained, but also that are irrational (just think family complications as only they can be but never describable). His brother in particular is likely to view it as 'naming after his half brother' and potentially jealousy issues, even though it is not that we are naming him after him.

This name is the one name we have both thought, yes. we think this baby might be a Dimitri.

Is is worth alienating the family (as this is likely) for a name?

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differentID · 15/08/2009 17:50

In my opinion, if a name is going to raise such complex issues which will spoil the relationships within a family it should not be used, especially as it will get peoples backs up.

You have had a stressful pregnancy so far and are the arguments going to be worth it?

I love the name as well, but given the family history I wouldn't use it.

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differentID · 15/08/2009 17:50

In my opinion, if a name is going to raise such complex issues which will spoil the relationships within a family it should not be used, especially as it will get peoples backs up.

You have had a stressful pregnancy so far and are the arguments going to be worth it?

I love the name as well, but given the family history I wouldn't use it.

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differentID · 15/08/2009 17:50

oops soryr PAv!

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PavlovtheForgetfulCat · 15/08/2009 17:51

DID - you are right, but its so so frustrating as its a great name, it is strong, and manly, but not to harsh, it goes perfectly with our surname, and with DDs name. It feels so right, but is clearly so wrong!!!

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PavlovtheForgetfulCat · 15/08/2009 17:52

What are you apologising for?

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differentID · 15/08/2009 17:54
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screamingabdab · 15/08/2009 18:00

I would say, find another name.

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PavlovtheForgetfulCat · 15/08/2009 18:44

Oh yeah lol, I did not see!

I am not sure if I like names from the Orthodox church DID, DH and I have said maybe we should look at similar names as we really do like it.

What other names are there in the Orthodox church? DH is not greek. His mother married a greek man before DHs dad.

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mathanxiety · 15/08/2009 19:28

Could you make up a long dead great aunt Demetria whom you loved dearly and want to honour?

I would go ahead and stick to your guns. Your family only knows and remembers the original Demetrius, and I think when they get to know and love the new one they will be charmed.

The other names I can think of from the (Russian) Orthodox church would be Alexei, Victor, Basil (Vasili), Alexander, Andre, Nicholas, Hilary, Valery,(maybe too girly), Lev, Michael, George...

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AitchTwoOh · 15/08/2009 19:30

i'm afraid i'd ditch the idea, why saddle your child with someone else's bad baggage?

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Greensleeves · 15/08/2009 19:31

I wouldn't do it.

How about Dima? I know a gorgeous little Ukrainian boy called Dima.

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nooka · 15/08/2009 19:48

I think this is really tricky. I would avoid causing hurt intentionally, but names can be redeemed. My sister called her second dd a name that is usually a shortening of the name of my aunt who died when fairly young (in her thirties) and with whom my father had a very complex relationship and it has been OK. I wouldn't do it personally though.

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BitOfFun · 15/08/2009 19:57

A famous Dmitri

Another one

another one

Trying to put you of...

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Tocky · 15/08/2009 20:02

As someone from a Greek Orthdodox family, I would say it's best not to do it. My mother is still grumpy with me for choosing my grandfather's (my dad's father) name for my ds. He isn't named after my grandfather as such - it was just a name dp and I both loved for other reasons. But my mother disliked her FIL and feels like I've "honoured" him in some way by choosing the name for my son...although I stuck to my guns I would say it's not worth the bother!

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TiggyR · 15/08/2009 20:26

No. They may be being irrational, but even so, No.

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PavlovtheForgetfulCat · 16/08/2009 21:10

tocky - that is exactly how they would feel, that we have honoured someone who does not derserve it, and feel betrayed.

So you are all right, we have ditched the idea.





We are thinking of

Alexis or Alexander. Shortened to Alex. Yey or nay?

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traceybath · 16/08/2009 21:13

Alexander is lovely - i also like Zander as a nn.

Not so sure about alexis as it reminds me a bit of joan collins in her dynasty days

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GirlsAreLoud · 16/08/2009 21:13

What about Alexei? I love that.

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thesecondcoming · 16/08/2009 21:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PavlovtheForgetfulCat · 16/08/2009 22:28

thesecondcoming - not greek, but have greek links to the family. I don't like mario as it reminds me of supermario! Lorenzo, not really.

Alexei - DH loves that name, but I not sure if it is a bit girly.

Don't like Zander as an abbreviation, prefer Alex.

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mathanxiety · 17/08/2009 00:54

Alexei is Russian -- I would never think of it as girly, have to say. I like it a lot. Alexander is more international, not necessarily tied to the Orthodox world. I too prefer Alex as a nn. Zander is a bit "trying too hard to be different." How about Constantine? Is that too Greek?

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nooka · 17/08/2009 02:45

Actually I think Alexis is much more girly than Alexei (especially as I know a female Alexis). Alexei sounds exotic and interesting and the hard "i" at the end is masculine sounding to me.

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Tocky · 17/08/2009 20:14

a vote for Alex from me(funnily enough, my ds's name!)

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PavlovtheForgetfulCat · 17/08/2009 20:20

nooka - think you are probably right, alexis is a bit girly

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