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I regret my son's name...

36 replies

AlaskaTheKitten · 07/12/2016 01:36

He will be 1 in February and I still regret it but I don't know what to do! It's his first and middle name but I don't know why. I have a name that I prefer and did want from the start but I still don't know why I cannot get over this regret... :(

OP posts:
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CaptainCabinets · 07/12/2016 02:46

What is it...?

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Pallisers · 07/12/2016 02:52

Is it really the name or are you finding things difficult generally?

Sometimes I think having a hard time in the first year (and my god it can be hard) can manifest itself in other things.

The first year can be hard. If you are having a great time and it is just the name, then maybe think about changing it. But if you are stressed, maybe the name is a symptom and not the real issue.

Or is it you felt railroaded into the name and your choice wasn't considered? (that would piss me off big time).

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CelestialLight · 07/12/2016 02:52

I changed my dc's name at 10 months, to the one I originally wanted and ex-p wouldn't let me have. I'm still so, so glad I did. It really wasn't a big deal, I just told everyone one day, and that was that.

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Pluto30 · 07/12/2016 02:52

What's his name?

What don you not love about it?

What is the name you prefer, why do you prefer it, and why didn't you choose it initially?

I can try to give you some more advice if I know the answers to these questions, or I can at least reassure you about your name choice, or decision to change it. Smile

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AlaskaTheKitten · 07/12/2016 02:59

His dad promised me that he would stick by us and be a good father to him so I obviously compromised on things which included the name. The thing is he then fucked off just after I had registered him but thought the name would grow on me as it was now his name. His name is Noah Jayden and I don't think it's a bad name I just feel like it will always bug me as it will remind me of how he promised to be his dad and isn't here being a good one! I would go for Elliot Quinn and I still love it and wished I had used it...

OP posts:
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Out2pasture · 07/12/2016 03:07

change it, why relive painful times.

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previously1474907171 · 07/12/2016 03:26

Change it, have a fresh start.

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ChopsticksandChilliCrab · 07/12/2016 03:28

Definitely change it, and the sooner the better.

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user1477282676 · 07/12/2016 03:37

CHange it! Nothing to do with anyone but yourself. If people ask why, just say "I never chose that name and now I'm choosing"

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RueDeDay · 07/12/2016 03:40

In your circumstances, I would change the name. Elliot Quinn is lovely.

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SlottedSpoon · 07/12/2016 03:58

I don't think changing your son's name is going to ease the pain of being dumped by his father in the least. However, if you still can't get comfortable with the name then by all means change it and do it as soon as possible. The longer you leave it the harder it will be to get everyone else on board over it.

But don't expect that changing his name will miraculously cure how you feel about your situation. It won't.

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goddessofsmallthings · 07/12/2016 03:58

You have a year from the date of registration of the birth to change your ds's forename(s) - see 'Changing A Forename' here: //www.ukdp.co.uk/name-change-birth-certificate-england-and-wales/

However, if your ds's father is named on his birth certificate you may need his consent or a Specific Issues Order from the Family Courts to effect the change.

As this is likely to bug you more as time goes by I suggest you contact the Registry Office where you registered your ds's birth today and ask for guidance to initiate the process.

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HeadDreamer · 07/12/2016 04:11

Echo that you can add an admendment to his first names in the birth certificate since he is not one yet. It is very easy to do. Just go back to where he was register and they can sort it.

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Pluto30 · 07/12/2016 04:16

Aw, sorry, OP. Flowers

I say change it. As someone else said, consider it a fresh start.

Elliot Quinn is a lovely name.

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SlottedSpoon · 07/12/2016 04:36

in view of what goddess has said, are you likely to get given a really hard time by your ex if you attempt to do this? Will he object and make it difficult? Is there an element of vengeance on your part to annoy him and provoke a reaction to punish him for leaving you?

Because if it creates a shit load of conflict it might just make you feel even worse worse. If that is likely then you could just call him Elliott and leave his BC as it is? Lots of people are known their whole lives by names that are not in their BC. Although it causes some confusion issues, it might be easier than opening up a can of worms with your ex.

On the other hand, if he is unlikely to make things awkward and is happy to cooperate then go ahead.

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Gruffalosfriend · 07/12/2016 09:57

In your circumstances, I would definately change it!

Elliot Quinn is a lovely name! (I also like Quinn Elliot). Good Luck!

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Middleoftheroad · 07/12/2016 10:07

Do it. Always regret not giving mine middle names. And that was 10 yrs ago so change it while you can.

When I decided I wanted to, they were 14 months old and it was too late. Envy

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NavyandWhite · 07/12/2016 14:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JinCa · 09/12/2016 06:17

Change it. He is your son.

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FriendofBill · 09/12/2016 06:23

Change it ASAP.

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MrsElls · 13/12/2016 07:02

No advice really but I think Elliott Quinn is a great name!

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DollyPlastic · 13/12/2016 07:07

I much prefer Elliot. Change it and don't look back Brew

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enqueue · 13/12/2016 07:09

Change it Smile
Elliott Quinn is great. And people close enough to you to ask about the change will likely pat you on the back for being strong enough.

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shinynewusername · 13/12/2016 07:11

Always regret not giving mine middle names. And that was 10 yrs ago so change it while you can

You can just add one - my DParents did for me when they realised I was upset to be the only sibling without one. I was 6 or 7 at the time. Your legal name is whatever you are called by family, friends etc - it doesn't have to be on your birth certificate. My middle name is on my passport and all official documents apart from my birth certificate.

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thisagain · 13/12/2016 07:17

Change it. It. May seem like a big thing now, but in the future it will just be a memory. I actually love the name Noah but Elliot is also great!

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