Opinions... Double-barrel or not?

(6 Posts)
CluelessOn Mon 27-Jun-16 04:17:25

Never been fussed on marriage, but I do realise it's important with regards to children? Might have gotten that wrong. Anyway, DP does want us to get married. Fine, I'll love it and that's great, it's the man I love. However, I don't want my last name to just disappear (last name is White) and so I was considering a double-barrelled, but now I don't know. He is okay with it (just!) and so I was thinking we both change our surname to the double barrelled and then our DC has that last name too.

Name would be Peterson-White. Which I think sounds fine, but eh. I wish there was another way around this

FizzyPop24 Mon 27-Jun-16 04:56:27

A few people I know have done this, where both partners change their name to the new surname. I think Peterson-White sounds good, it definitely works.

MustStopAndThinkBeforePosting Mon 27-Jun-16 05:38:53

We both changed our names and gave DC double barrelled. If I had the decision again I'd choose different because it's not a sustainable trend and if we want society to move on from a patronymic system where a woman loses her old name but a man doesn't, we need to establish a new tradition that can last more than one generation. If two people with double barrelled surnames marry they won't go quadruple will they?

Other options would be -

a) create a new surname out of the two, e.g. Patterwhit or Whitterson

b) (this was the established tradition in a utopian scifi novel) choose a surname that is meaningful in some way about who you and DP are, then both go double barrelled with that. e.g. if you are both keen on countryside rambles you could be
Walker-Patterson and Walker-White
Rambler-Patterson and Rambler-White
... then this new name that you choose and make your own is the only surname given to the DC ie Rambler or Walker. So the whole family shares a name but the dc don't have to choose whether to perpetuate their mother's name or father's name when they arrive at this decision for themselves.

Or you could just get DP to become a White

LadyStarkOfWinterfell Mon 27-Jun-16 05:42:18

I think it's the obvious choice for your children and a good idea if you want to share a name with your husband without losing yours

scottsporridgeoats Mon 27-Jun-16 10:06:02

Peterson-White is a good surname to have! Go for it!

VioletBam Mon 27-Jun-16 10:07:20

Sounds perfect to me OP. I can't deal with the whole expectation that the woman's name must go. It's bull.

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