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Is it ok to not tell people the name on the birth certificate?

42 replies

CradleCrapNap · 16/04/2016 21:22

Still struggling to pick a name for our DD2, due soon. We both like Sophia and Grace but know both are quite common, as is our DD1s name. So we thought today about Harriet/Hattie. We both love Hattie but worry it might be too cutesy in later life, so might put Harriet on the birth certificate (if we do go for it, we change our minds daily at the minute).
But, we would want her to be known, at least in her early years, solely as Hattie. So, is it ok to announce her birth to people as 'Hattie' and not even mention Harriet? Or is that weird? Or should we put Harriet and 'Hattie' in the announcement? I wouldn't mind people calling her Harriet and want her to have that choice later in life but we'd just like her to be mostly Hattie as a little girl. My gut says put the proper name and the nickname, but a friend has just done this and just announced the nickname. Found out by accident. Wondered how common this was?

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NapQueen · 16/04/2016 21:24

We gave dd a nickname,rather than either of the longer versions of it, as we love the nn and not a fan of either longer version. Maybe one person has used one of the longer names but we corrected them. I dont know how id feel about correcting them if they were actually "correct"

Id just go for Hattie

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MrsJayy · 16/04/2016 21:25

Yes its fine just tell folk her name and register the full name.

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Icecappedpinetrees · 16/04/2016 21:27

I'd put Harriet on certificate and introduce her as Hattie so everyone will use it. Then she can choose as she gets older.

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Twinkie1 · 16/04/2016 21:28

They won't listen to you. They'll call her Harry.

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AKissACuddleAndACheekyFinger · 16/04/2016 21:29

It doesn't matter really-if you say her name is Hattie (beautiful by the way) I guarantee within the first week you'll be asked if it's short for Harriet anyway but people will use whatever you introduce her as. We have an AJ and I have never heard anyone call him anything else I don't think-he's 17! (Apart from doctors etc.)

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CradleCrapNap · 16/04/2016 21:31

I don't know why I'm giving this so much thought! We knew which name we wanted for DD1 pretty much immediately, and she has pads of nn's, from us and everyone else. It doesn't bother me. I think it's because this time we like a certain nn possibly even more than the actual name, which we still love btw. But just don't see Hattie as being a name she will certainly be happy with as a possibly serious adult in a possibly serious job. If she goes down that route! Argh!

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CradleCrapNap · 16/04/2016 21:31

Loads, not pads!

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3boys3dogshelp · 16/04/2016 21:34

I know it's not what you asked op but I prefer Sophia and especially Grace to Hattie.
All 3 of my boys have popular, traditional names and it's never caused a problem. I just picked the names I loved most at the time. If you prefer the others and Harriet/Hattie feels like an awkward compromise don't do it, you'll regret it later.

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TheOptimisticPessimist · 16/04/2016 21:35

My niece is a Hatty (she point blank refuses to spell it Hattie now that she's older Hmm) and she's always been introduced as such. The only people that call her Harriet are her teachers/GP!

Just introduce her as Hattie and you'll be fine. No one would think twice about introducing an Alexandra as Alex!

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3boys3dogshelp · 16/04/2016 21:35

Oops cross post! If you love Hattie that's different obviously Grin

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Rowboat · 16/04/2016 21:36

We have a boy who has a "Sunday name", but we always refer to his nn. We announced his full name and then immediately referred to his nn. Barely ever gets called his full name, but we do sometimes so he knows it's him. It works fine. Incidentally his nn is a less common shortening of his full name so we got in there quick to avoid the wrong one.
So, really haven't found there's a problem with people using the right one. If that makes sense.

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JustCallMeBaldrick · 16/04/2016 21:37

I have a Hattie who is 'officially' Harriet. Everyone knows her as Hattie, but she can choose which one she prefers when she's older.
FWIW, I've always been known as a nickname form of the name which is on my birth certificate, and it hasn't caused me any problems!

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Squashybanana · 16/04/2016 21:39

A friend made the announcement ' Henry George Smith (to be known to his friends as Harry) arrived safely at 7:30pm weighing 8lb 5oz' in their birth announcement. (I have obviously changed all details!)

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Laquila · 16/04/2016 21:40

I would use Harriet on the BC and word the birth announcement as something like:

"...safe arrival of Harriet (Hattie) Cradle, born on 10 Apr..." etc etc.

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Luciferbox · 16/04/2016 21:43

We announced DS2 as full name (shortened name) and everyone has referred to him as the shortened preferred name. He only gets full named when in trouble.

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AnotherUsernameBitesTheDust · 16/04/2016 21:48

DH told his family DSs shortened version before we announced his full name. He's always been called by his nn, most people who I've become friends with since he was born didn't even realise he was actually called the full version. Even school only use the full version on his official stuff.

I love Harriet and Hattie. Was on my girls list. Smile

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CradleCrapNap · 16/04/2016 21:49

Thanks for the replies. When I say 'we love' the name, I've always loved Harriet, but husband said he liked it but preferred he others. Then today 'Hattie' came up in conversation and he said he lives Hattie. I then to him it was short for Harriet, and now he's more open to Harriet, because he loves Hattie! So that's probably why we want to make sure she's known more as Hattie. But we both agree, Harriet might be a good option for when she is older and can choose what she prefers.

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PeterRabbitt · 16/04/2016 22:02

We have a Charlie, everyone calls him Charlie and it's assumed that is his given name. It's Charles on his birth certificate Confused we just never thought to tell people really. We knew we'd call him by the nickname version day to day so that's how we introduced him. Sometimes people ask and I'd happily tell them what his official name is. Like you, I think of Charles as his adult name and he's still only little.

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Mumoftwoyoungkids · 16/04/2016 22:12

When texting everyone to say Dd had arrived we said (the equivalent of):-

Harriet Grace Smith was born at 4:22pm today. Hattie weighed in at 8lb 6oz and is absolutely gorgeous.

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Haffdonga · 16/04/2016 22:19

I have a commonly abbreviated name e.g Lizzy, but on my BC I have the long version e.g. Elizabeth due to my df not following the agreement with my dm and registering the wrong version

To this day I have never been called 'Elizabeth'. My friends don't think of me as Elizabeth. My family have never used Elizabeth. But being and Elizabeth on my passport and driving licence has been straightforward. I'm quite glad I have it as a grownup name and officialdom does like to assume that my formal name is the longer version.

Do the hattie/Harriet combo. It's lovely Smile

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Indecisiveness · 16/04/2016 22:27

Our dd3 is known as Hattie but is actually Helena! We loved the nn Hattie so much, but dh preferred Hattie to Harriet so thought we couldn't choose a name where we preferred the nn to the name (dh would always insist on a full name on the BC). Hattie is probably a stretch for Helena but then it's only a nn and I guess you can have whatever nn you want. I introduce her to people as Hattie. I do wonder if I should have insisted on Harriet...

Dd1 is known by a shorter version of her name. We announced her full name at birth as well as her 'to be known as' name. She has never been called her full name (apart from at the dr), even at school. But, she has the choice when she is older.

I love nn's. Perhaps because I have such a boring name that never be shortened. I like the idea of having the choice of a full name and a nn.

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CradleCrapNap · 16/04/2016 22:33

Thanks everyone. Right now we are both agreed on Harriet on birth cert, to be known as Hattie generally. We will probably end up using both I'm sure, like when we tell her off!! But mostly will use Hattie. And will probably announce it in a similar fashion to those suggested above. Much like we do with Dd1 and her nn's.

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Indecisiveness · 16/04/2016 22:33

BTW, our DD2 is Sophia - you have great taste! 😉

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SabineUndine · 16/04/2016 22:35

I think you're very wise to put the full name on the birth certificate. Hattie is fine for a little girl but she may want a grown up name when she's older. I argued one of my friends out of Millie because I couldn't see a woman of 25 wanting a baby name like that.

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fruitpastille · 17/04/2016 08:25

I think there are so many names around like Hattie, Evie, Tilly, Gracie... that all those individuals will think their names are perfectly suitable for adulthood when they get there. I love the nn and full name we gave DD but everyone exclusively uses the nn and I have a slight regret that we never used the full name at first as I don't think it will ever get used except in official documents.

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