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partner hates my favourite name

30 replies

Lauragrace83 · 18/11/2015 01:22

My OH and I are planning to try for our second baby over the next year, we've discussed names as standard and for a girl I am in love with the name Caliope (pronounced Ca-Lie-O-Pea) I've loved this name since I was a young girl and always said I would name my LG this, my OH hates this and wants something 'normal'. Is there any inspirational people out there I can convince my OH to like this name (please don't say Greys Anatomy, no matter how strong she is in the series, this annoys him and he believes I've got the name from TV when I haven't Sad)

OP posts:
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TheHouseOnTheLane · 18/11/2015 01:57

No. Of course you can't convince him. The sound of words (names) is a very personal thing....it sounds ugly to me and probably to him too. That's not changeable.

It's also going to cause multiple issues with people being unable to read it...all her life and saying "What?" when she says it.

Focus your attention on finding another name which you both love.

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Elllicam · 18/11/2015 02:10

I quite like it but if he doesn't you probably have to compromise I'm afraid. What about Cassia or Callin? I sympathise if I had had my way my children would have been named differently :)

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MyNewBearTotoro · 18/11/2015 02:18

Unfortunately I think if you want to choose the name alone you need to go down the route of having a baby alone (eg: sperm donor).

If you want to have a baby as part of a partnership with DP then you need to choose the name as a partnership as well and find something you both love. Perhaps he would be willing to compromise and have Calillope as a middle name?

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lloydlf76 · 18/11/2015 02:33

My husband has hated three of our five children's names during pregnancy. I just carried on with my campaigning and chipping away at his resistance. I genuinely loved them and his refusal was based on dislike but he wasn't bringing any names to the table himself. On two of them I ended up having mini meltdowns about the lack of name and he conceded. The last one was a change of mind in the operating theatre 30 minutes after baby was born and I was in such a state he really couldn't refuse lol He now lives them and annoyingly even tells people he chose them!

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SoWhite · 18/11/2015 08:05

No, you can't convince him.

You wouldn't want to be convinced of a name you hate, would you?

Treat your OH with more respect than that.

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celtictoast · 18/11/2015 09:15

Coralie, Caroline?

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fairyfeatures · 18/11/2015 10:18

No you can't convince him, I have had the same problem. I have given up as I realised, as much as I loved it, I would hate it more that my DH didn't even like it let alone love it. This baby is as much his as it is mine. Same for you, for you to say you have wanted it since you were a child is (and I don't mean this nastily) a bit childish... You are in this on a joint venture together after all.

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ThroughThickAndThin01 · 18/11/2015 10:32

No you can't convince him. Keep talking about it because it may grow on him. Other than that it'll have to be a compromise name.

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Thurlow · 18/11/2015 10:41

Sorry, no, you can't convince him. It's a pretty name, but if he doesn't like it he doesn't like it. Try and imagine if he was equally convinced he could talk you into liking a name you could never imagine having a child called.

Maybe compromise on having it as a middle name? DP has a boy's name he always imagined having a son called. I can't stand it. So the compromise, as it is important to him, is that it will be a middle name.

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Heebiejeebie · 18/11/2015 10:47

Try and imagine people with furrowed brows saying 'Cally-ope??' That might put you off

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MargoReadbetter · 18/11/2015 10:52

Lovely name. In my mind similar to Olympia, Penelope and Apollonia (DH vetoed this one).

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MitzyLeFrouf · 18/11/2015 10:53

I don't see any problem with trying to convince someone. It certainly isn't disrespectful for God's sake. But if he says 'no way, never' you're just going to have to start thinking of some new names.

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RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 18/11/2015 10:54

No, you an't convince him. Choosing names in partnership is part of being just that: a partnership. Wait until you're pregnant and then find names that you both like.

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pictish · 18/11/2015 10:55

This is one of times in life when you have to come to terms with the fact that you're not going to get what you want.
It's a bummer when your OH doesn't like your name choice but it's not something you can insist on going ahead with anyway.

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Arfarfanarf · 18/11/2015 10:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sophronia · 18/11/2015 12:40

How about Callista, Calanthe or Calla instead?

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Narp · 18/11/2015 19:52

My DH hated all my favourite names for DS1

Then he looked through a Baby Names book and found The One.

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florascotianew · 18/11/2015 19:55

Not my favourite name, but usually spelled Calliope, with 2 x l.

If it helps, name of one of the nine Greek Muses. Mistress of the war-god, Ares. From the ancient Greek kallos (beauty) and 'ops' (voice).

Many would say: Kah-ly-ah-pee.

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UnlikelyPilgramage · 18/11/2015 19:56

My DD is a Callia, although she is always known as Cally. For some reason I don't like calliope - it looks like Cally-op to me!

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Narp · 18/11/2015 19:58

Unlikely

Cally is lovely. It reminds me of Blake's Seven (that ages me...). Callia is beautiful

I can see why the OP's DH is wary of Calliope. Although it's pretty, if you are of a more conservative mindset, it's a bit 'flowery'

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Duckdeamon · 18/11/2015 19:59

You need to get over it and look for another name that you both like, sadly. It doesn't matter how long you've had it in mind for your potential future DC, his opinion is as important as yours in this.

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Sleepingtom · 20/11/2015 19:48

My DD's name wasn't my first choice. I 'grieved' that choice for longer than was probably indicative of good mental health for a while but knew that more than anything I wanted a name we had chosen together. I love her name now.

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IoraRua · 20/11/2015 20:16

Nothing wrong with you trying to convince him. But there's a difference between that and whinging, and if he really hates it you'll have to get on with thinking of some new names.
I'd say the same thing if he loved Assumpta and you hates it. It's got to be a mutual decision.

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BathtimeFunkster · 20/11/2015 20:24

You both have to agree on a name.

There are so many.

Your childhood dreams didn't involve the actual individual you have chosen to be the father of your children.

He isn't into poncy Greek names.

My DH tried to get all sorts of ridiculous names from Ancient Greek literature past me, but I was having none of it Grin

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SoWhite · 20/11/2015 20:54

DH has just informed me that a Calliope is also a steam organ, as well as a Greek muse.

He recommends this video to help put you off the name. He says, that when you've seen it, you'll laugh at the idea of calling a human after this particular instrument.

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