OH wants to pay tribute in middle name - I don't like it!

(60 Posts)
bethellex Sat 26-Jul-14 21:11:11

Hi all, I'm having my first baby in November - a little girl and OH wants the middle name to be Pauleen, after his Gran. As much as I like his Nan and think this is a nice thought, I really don't like the name! Also my mum's new partner is called paul and it just reminds me of him!

The two first names we've managed to both agree we like are:
Lilia (preferred)
Alba

Do Lilia Pauleen or Alba Pauleen sound that bad?
Am I being selfish and disrespectful?

Our last name starts with R and is two syllables.

I like the name Lilia Belle.

I was thinking about the idea of two middle names so for example: Lilia (name) Pauleen (lastname)

What are everyone's thoughts on all of the names!? And any suggestions!?

Leviticus Sat 26-Jul-14 21:15:03

This is what middle names are for! It will probably sound fashionably retro by the the time she's a teen.

JohnFarleysRuskin Sat 26-Jul-14 21:16:15

I don't think you are being selfish or disrespectful, however I love remembering old people in babies names - dd has a very non flow middle name for that reason!

I think it sounds fine and special/unusual and will make people happy.

Or What about pauleena? Or Lena?

Leviticus Sat 26-Jul-14 21:16:45

And I actually think Lilia Pauline is nicer than Lilia Belle (which is sweet but very much of the current trend) fwiw.

callamia Sat 26-Jul-14 21:17:49

Personally, I find Lilia Belle a bit too Disney Princess. But I'm a dreadful old killjoy sometimes. Pauleen is quite sweet, though I agree, it's not what I'd choose either; but the sentiment is lovely. I think middle names are best when they serve a purpose like that, rather than just being pretty or sounding nice. Does your partner's nan have a nicer middle name herself?

winkywinkola Sat 26-Jul-14 21:19:02

Pauline/ leen is my least favourite ne ever.

Personally I'd go with 2 middle names.

Similar scenario here - Scottish tradition dictates that the first born has to have my maiden name as a middle name (I have my mums maiden name which is nothing like any normal first name). So we're having X/X/maiden name/surname.

PenguinsHatchedAnEgg Sat 26-Jul-14 21:28:25

I think Lilia Belle is a bit Disney too I'm afraid. I'm not a big fan of Belle generally - seems like a filler name to me.

Personally I would go with something a bit more classic. The problem with having Pauleen as a second middle name is that I'm not sure it will flow. Lilia Pauleen <short name> probably would though. Lilia Pauleen Grace, etc.

I presume Pauleen is the unusual spelling his Nan uses?

Floralnomad Sat 26-Jul-14 21:29:19

Not keen on Pauleen ,but even less keen on Lilia Belle . Will you not risk offending all the other grans if you just use the name of one ( assuming you have 2 each) . Is the original Pauleen deceased and that's why he wants it ?

Rhubarbgarden Sat 26-Jul-14 21:32:47

I agree that Lilia Pauleen has more character than Lilia Belle, which is very twee. I think using the middle name to honour relatives is both lovely and meaningful. Much nicer than just picking a random name. But if you really hate it, then I guess you have the right to veto.

FWIW my ds has a middle name that I dislike, which is a family name on DH's side. It meant a lot to DH so I was happy to use it. It's actually grown on me.

SinglePringle Sat 26-Jul-14 21:33:17

Not hugely keen on Lilia Belle - makes me think of labia. Sorry.

Lilia Pauline is pretty.

It's a name I really dislike too (my mother is a Pauline) does his gran have a middle name that is better?

Lilia Pauline sounds fine. I quite like it. I'd just go with it, middle names are barely used anyway.

JohnFarleysRuskin Sat 26-Jul-14 21:43:38

Lilian Pauline sounds quite French!

JohnFarleysRuskin Sat 26-Jul-14 21:44:08

I mean Lilia, Doh.

Buttercup27 Sat 26-Jul-14 21:44:43

Sorry but lilia belle sounds like at Italian restaurant. But I agree about pauline . Sorry no advice not sure what I would do. Luckily we decided that if we had a boy he would have dh middle name that is a family name and if we had s hi she would have mine, also a family name. We had 2 boys so 1 has dh middle name and 1 has my dad's middle name.

MsBug Sat 26-Jul-14 21:46:21

I like Lilia pauleen and I like middle names which are family names (dd has one). Whose surname will your dd have? If it's yours then I think you should let dh choose a middle name to honour his side of the family, but if she will have your dh's surname then you should pick the middle name.

MaxsMummy2012 Sat 26-Jul-14 21:47:23

FWIW I like lilia pauline but if you're not keen could you pair it with one of your nans names so that she is lilia (your nan) pauline surname? It might change the flow a bit to something you prefer.

HaroldLloyd Sat 26-Jul-14 21:50:00

I prefer Pauline to Belle, and I think it's nice it's a bit retro, agree with whoever said that's what middle names are for!

If you really hate it, dunno, did she have any other names.

MultipleMama Sat 26-Jul-14 21:54:28

I prefer Lilia Pauleen.

Lilia Belle sounds like a Disney Princess and I think most people would assume that when they here it. Belle to me is an awful filler name.

If not keen then try adding another middle name. I actually like PenguinsHatchedAnEgg's name suggestion; Lilia Pauleen Grace.

sassytheFIRST Sat 26-Jul-14 21:58:52

How about Paulina - pron Paul eye na. Not so Middle Aged?

Casey123 Sat 26-Jul-14 22:04:41

How often are you going to have to say her full name including middle names? I'd just keep quiet and get on with it -its not a deal breaker. At least you get your choice first name.

flusteredmumto2 Sat 26-Jul-14 22:08:08

I'm not keen on one of the middle names my baby will have but I will be having another middle name before it and DP agreed so even though her name won't flow I like the idea of remembering a previous family member.Hers will be Olga so Pauleen I
isn't that bad.
I love Lilia though its a very pretty name.

MostWicked Sat 26-Jul-14 22:12:36

Not a fan of naming children after relatives. I wanted my kids to have their own identity. I don't see how it honours anyone.
If you like the name then fine, but I would never have agreed to my children having a name that I hadn't chosen because I liked it.

bethellex Sat 26-Jul-14 23:48:50

Thank you everyone for your help.
OH doesn't know if she has any other names!? And no she is still alive. My gran's names are Diane Lucy (who has passed away) and Genevieve Frances so do any of you think this works better? I think he might change his mind on the name but who knows - luckily we have until November!

You've all rained on my parade with disliking Belle! - i love disney! haha. But I do see everyone's point -
Does anyone have any suggestions for middle name/names?

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