Mother giving me grief over baby name!

(69 Posts)
DitzyDonkey Mon 07-Jul-14 19:06:27

I must start by stating that my dm is absolutely AMAZING in every way and I trust her opinion on everything smile

Which is probably why I'm finding it so annoying that she doesn't like my choice of Kitty if I have a girl. (She likes all my boy choices btw).

She says she is surprised that I am going with something so plain after all the other lovely choices I have suggested over the three years of ttc with fertility problems. (The problem is that all of those lovely names just don't feel right). She says it is a nothing name, though she said this about my ds name but adores it now. She thinks it is an old ones name and nothing special.

I think that it is quirky and old fashioned but not batshit crazy which is what I am going for. Dh loves it as do I. Oh and btw the issue is nothing to do with putting something longer on the birth cert! grin

I don't really know what I'm asking, I think I just want to vent!

Drinkingpimmsinmygarden Mon 07-Jul-14 19:13:01

I like Kitty but would put Katherine or something on the certificate

HappydaysArehere Mon 07-Jul-14 19:14:35

I am biased. My dear mothers name. Her name was Kathleen but she was known as Kit or Kitty although also Kathy. My dad called her Kitty. Does it sound right with your surname? Go with what you both love. Mothers often have certain ideas about names so don't be surprised if they can't resist input.

BlueStarsAtNight Mon 07-Jul-14 19:16:26

To be honest if that's the one you both love then you just need to have a chat with your dm and say "you've given us your opinion, but obviously it's ours that counts and we love it, so I'd appreciate it if you could refrain from any more negative comments about our favourite name".

BlueStarsAtNight Mon 07-Jul-14 19:17:02

Not that that would work on my mum smile

DitzyDonkey Mon 07-Jul-14 19:20:51

I thin basically she just wants me to call it her preference which is Florence btw...I think that is the only solution hmm which is not going to happen!

It's nothing to do with putting something formal on the BC as I hate Catherine, Kathleen, Catriona etc as does my dm (so at least we agree on something)

DitzyDonkey Mon 07-Jul-14 19:22:44

Also I think she associates it with older long dead relatives who I never met and I suppose it seems dowdy and common to her. Where as with this generation it is not common!

pluCaChange Mon 07-Jul-14 19:24:17

Call her Ekaterina, who was a Kitty in "Anna Karenina" ("English" names vair posh), and let her be grateful it's not Kitty's poor sister Daria ( I think) / "Dolly" ugh

Or "change your mind" to Mehitabel, and see how grateful she is for Kitty!

Bowlersarm Mon 07-Jul-14 19:26:07

Kitty is fantastic.

Ignore her.

And never discuss names until you present the baby after birth with name attached. There is always someone who'll put you off.

My mum went crazy when I said Arthur was on our boys list. "You can't call him that, it's an old mans name, I won't use it I'll just call him boy, blah blah" in the end I said that it's mine and dhs choice so tough and if she just called the baby boy then she would look stupid so that was up to her.
In the end the problem was solved because I had dd grin
Just tell her it's your choice not hers and she'd have to put up with it.

Gingerjv Mon 07-Jul-14 19:49:58

I do not like Kitty:-( only if it's shorten from Katherin/Cathrin/etc. Kitty is equal to Cookie, Candy and other names of that kind to me;-)IMO these are names to showgirls;-)

burgatroyd Mon 07-Jul-14 19:50:31

I feel you. Mum is brill but she didn't like most of dd2s suggested names. In the end picked something no one really loved and there were problems with pronunciation. Changed it to something mum loved which made me feel better about it. Mum picked dd1s name.
Yes, there is the school of thought that its your baby, do you decide the name, but many cultures bestow that honour onto grandparents. Looking back there were so many names, including her own, that I would have loved to name dd2. Though oh didn't like those names.
Personally I think Kitty is insubstantial. Is it also trending right now? Been hearing it a lot on threads and met one in RL the other day. I asked her mum if it was kitty on BC and she said yes. I was surprised.
That said you might think the names for my dds are horrific.
I suspect you need us to cheer you on to follow the courage of your convictions. I don't subscribe to the one perfect name theory though and tastes change.

MamaLazarou Mon 07-Jul-14 19:54:49

She'll get used to it!

Badvoc2 Mon 07-Jul-14 19:56:45

It's lovely and she being very rude.

joanofarchitrave Mon 07-Jul-14 19:57:36

Adorable name but even if it were Jezebel, just respond with 'hmm' until she runs out of steam.

Seriouslyffs Mon 07-Jul-14 20:00:41

Why on earth of people ever discuss names with family? confused

gamescompendium Mon 07-Jul-14 20:01:49

Family will always have opinions, they'll get used to the name whatever it is. DSis was at school with a girl she didn't like with DD1's name but DD1 has rehabilitated the name for her grin. When DM asked what my 'girl' option was for DS she admitted she didn't really like it. Luckily he was a boy and was already born by this point!

dreamingofsun Mon 07-Jul-14 20:02:24

isn't your mum likely to choose a name that is going to be dated. my mum gave me her friends name which she loved but is awful. she will choose a name from your age group - if that makes sense

i love the name kitty - we had a pet with it. if you put a longer name on the BC it does give your daughter more options.

parents had their time choosing names, now its your turn.

PuppyMonkey Mon 07-Jul-14 20:05:56

Tell your mum you've changed your mind then and she's going to be called Boris. Maybe that'll make her come round to Kitty wink

Or just call her the name you and your DP both love.

Kitty is lovely btw.

ilovelamp82 Mon 07-Jul-14 20:06:26

I like it. Not that it matters. You like it. That's all that matters. Why don't you ask her who picked your name? I imagine that should end the conversation.

She'll love it when she's holding her gorgeous granddaughter in her arms and within a month she'll not be able to imagine her called anything else.

Congratulations smile

domoarigato Mon 07-Jul-14 20:11:04

Hmmm, a 25 year old woman called Kitty? I don't like it, but you shouldn't care what anyone thinks. It's your baby. Next time don't discuss names...just tell them the baby's name on birth. It's harder to argue it then!

DitzyDonkey Mon 07-Jul-14 20:11:54

It's amazing really as she often shared the story of how much hassle she got from her own mother and sister when naming me!

I love thinking about names but it is now becoming stressful, I just want to enjoy the experience after the years of ttc!

DitzyDonkey Mon 07-Jul-14 20:13:07

I'm 29 and would love to be called Kitty, that is how I judge a name, would I have liked it as a child, teenager and grown woman....the answer is yes to all these!smile

You have learned the lesson the hard way - never discuss names before they are attached to a baby.

susiey Mon 07-Jul-14 20:19:41

This is exactly why I never shared my dc names before they were born! No one can share their opinion with you once they've been born.
Kitty is lovely

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