After months of agonising over a name,why am I still unsure we picked the Right One?!!

(34 Posts)
FriggFRIGG Fri 31-Jan-14 12:08:55

<head/desk>

DD is 7 weeks old,it took months of agonising on here,and days of agonising in RL after she was born. We ended up picking a name we hadn't even considered before she was born,and now I keep going back to the ones we had on The List and wondering if we should have chosen one of those instead.

Her name does appear to be a bit 'marmite' but then so is DS's and that never bothered me in the slightest...

Tell me it's just the hormones,or the sleep deprivation....or something.
Please?

AwfulMaureen Fri 31-Jan-14 13:17:59

I was like this over DD1s name...took us right up to the limit to choose and then I was unsure...I'm fine with it now...she's 9 and we're all happy. Her name is also a bit marmite.

freakydoris Fri 31-Jan-14 13:34:46

Do you like the name? Can you see yourself calling for her in the playground by that name? Do you have any weird feelings when you say "this is my daughter X" (I remember your threads and what you eventually decided on but didn't want to mention it as you haven't).

What other people think is of no consequence. I could do with remembering that myself I think! If your only wobble is to do with other people, but you love it, fuck em.

However,remember it will only get harder as time goes on to change her name,as people get used to it, you fill in more forms etc. If there is sonething you prefer I would do it sooner rather than later. Juniper is still my favourite!

I have two children with names I wobble on. Wish I had changed them when they were younger. Even my two year old seems like he is too old for a change of name now.

Thurlow Fri 31-Jan-14 13:42:59

Do you feel like you'll like the name forever? Is it just that it doesn't suit a little baby?

DD's full name is very "big" and doesn't suit a baby at all. We shorten it now, and it will work really well as an adult name.

If it helps, DP chose her name and in some ways I don't like it. Before I was pg I'd never, ever have imagined having a child known as 'X'. But now she is here, it is her name and it suits her so well. I do have odd moments, though, of thinking - really, I have a child called 'X'?

But then I also think if I had actually given her one of the names I'd thought/imagined about for years, it would have come with some baggage, and I'm glad that her name is now very much hers. If that makes any sense.

FriggFRIGG Fri 31-Jan-14 14:25:23

The thing is,I think I agonise over it so much because I don't like DD1's name all that much,and if she wasnt 5,I'd change it. I've wanted to change it since she was about 6 months old but even then I felt it was too late.

I adore DS's name and I'd never ever even shorten it,nothing made me think twice about it,even though it was rare and is becoming more popular and is also a bit marmite.

Which is odd seeing as I've always liked many more girls names than boys.

Her name is Greta Ivy Clementine,but we call her Etty.
I love that it has a cute NN but can also be a serious grown up name...but I'm pining over all the cutesy or flowery names that were on the list...
I'm worrying that Greta sounds harsh,I'm worried I excluded names I loved based on the worry that they were faddy or had become more popular than I thought they were,or because they sounded like something else (Ophelia = 'Oh,Feel,yer' in my addled pregnant mind,I KNOW it's not pronounced that way)

Sundaedelight Fri 31-Jan-14 14:30:46

Greta is gorgeous. The full name is fabulous!

Unique yet not out there. Doesn't sound harsh at all but firm and clear, not silly wishy washy like Ellie/Amy (sorry - just my opinion).

I love it and think it will be well-liked by people who have good taste, like me obviously! And you! grin

Clearlymisunderstood Fri 31-Jan-14 14:32:12

It's a fabulous name! I adore it!

Sundaedelight Fri 31-Jan-14 14:32:47

DD has a name that divides and I quite like that! Has never appeared on any threads and would probably be slated by those who prefer popular faddy names. But we love it! That's all that counts, do you and your family love it?

FriggFRIGG Fri 31-Jan-14 15:06:58

Thankyou,those were exactly the reasons why we choose it.

I do love it yes...I especially love Etty,but I suppose that's because She is tiny,and Greta seems quite grown up to me-though I can see it on a 5 year old...

People of a similar mindset seem to like it...but lots of people say things like:
'oh,is that a family name then?'
'why did you choose it?'
'We'll just call her Ivy then" (my dad!)
Or
'Oh,isn't that a German name!' (My mother!)

I suppose I just needed to re affirm why we love it,in the face of other people's utter confusion...

CarlaVeloso Fri 31-Jan-14 15:18:29

Think about it this way: if you changed it, would you be ok with letting go of Greta? Of that name disappearing, not saying it anymore? Would you miss it?

I like that Greta comes up as Great on my phone.

FlipFantasia Fri 31-Jan-14 15:25:20

You chose a gorgeous name! I adore Greta (if I didn't know a 2 year old I'd consider it as my grandmother's sister was Greta and I've always loved it). Etty is one of the nicest nn I've heard.

I love Clementine and ivy too.

Gorgeous names op!

UriGeller Fri 31-Jan-14 15:25:58

It's an amazing name. Strong and individual and Etty is really cute.

I think you're just having a 'grass is greener' moment, caused by reading what other people have called their babies.

Step away from the baby names websites grin

TheGirlOnTheLanding Fri 31-Jan-14 15:27:11

Love Greta, it's fab. And Etty is sweet for a wee one.

With our DD1 we went for a top 100 but not top 10 name. Still love it, but got a bit peeved when it later became a lot more popular. Went for a much more unusual name for DD2 (partly because of this, partly because we could only agree on this name). DMum wasn't keen, DMIL hated it (mutterings about how 'fancy' it was. This was not meant positively.) We wobbled.

But... it's her name. To change it felt like it would be like denying the first few weeks of her existence. And we had some awareness that hormones and tiredness were possibly making us a bit less rational and secure than we would otherwise be. I still sometimes wonder if we should have chosen something more popular (usually about the sixth misspelled Christmas card) but it's just her, now. She couldn't be another name. And there have been no more family mutterings (at least in our hearing) although we do get strangers asking why we chose it.

Do you think this is just a momentary wobble for you too? Or do you feel strongly that she is another name? I think if it's just a vague sense of the other possibilities you can safely ignore, but if a particular name is drawing you to it, I suppose you should consider changing. If you stick with it, Greta is easy to spell so you've done well on that score aling with choosing a lovely name!

FriggFRIGG Fri 31-Jan-14 15:41:06

No,there is no other name.
If I were to change it,I would be back at square one.

I think you're right about the 'grass is greener' moment...

I like it.

I was like this with dd2. Tbh I still am with her middle name, but for other reasons. She's one now and she's such a little dd2 that I can't really picture her as a Penelope now, which was our front runner up until the birth.

Oubliette0292 Fri 31-Jan-14 16:24:48

I love Greta. It is an amazing name. I totally agree with using a cute NN when they are small, but with the possibility of having a grown-up name when thay are older.

(and the wavering could well be hormones or sleep deprivation - I remember the 6 to 8 weeks stage being particularly hard).

jazzyjenbo Fri 31-Jan-14 17:37:58

When i had my daughter i only chose the name a week before she was born and have always considered it as a very feminine name (it means paradise and feminine beauty). I got lots of compliments and i love it.
When i announced her birth alit of ppl inboxed me saying do u know its a boys name, famous footballer with this name... I started having second thoughts.
I was convinced i should of called her millie... All her clothes were tiny baby asda's millie and ted so kept seeing this name.
But i looked at her and she was definitely an 'eden rose'...
All i'm saying if you like the name, which you clearly do stick with it, greta is strong and classic and etty is lovely. I also like etta as a nn.
Congratulations on ur little lady xgrin

SpawningSalmon Fri 31-Jan-14 23:34:44

I remember the thread when you chose the name, it was one of my first visits to the baby names section on MN. FWIW I thought it was gorgeous then and I still do now.

Greta is such a cute little girls name and will grow with her so well. It has a strength about it that will stand up if she doesn't turn out to be the flowery girl.

Grotbagstwin Fri 31-Jan-14 23:41:56

Gorgeous name. Was my lovely Nans name and she was an amazing lady. Everyone always commented on her lovely name, never met another one and if I have a girl at some point it would be my number one name. Also love Etty.

Frontdoorstep Sat 01-Feb-14 13:13:15

You say you were unsure about dd1's name and don't really like it and now you are querying dd2's name, is that correct?

In that case are you sure you aren't over thinking this?

Greta isn't common, but it is a name that people will be familiar with and know how to say and spell.

Only you can decide. If you do change it, I think you'll need to be sure you've got the right name, you won't want to change it again.

FriggFRIGG Sat 01-Feb-14 13:29:20

Oh yes, I'm almost 100% certain that I'm over thinking this wink

HoneyandRum Sat 01-Feb-14 13:50:41

Love Greta, beautiful name.

alizeeod Wed 12-Feb-14 06:00:31

I think the name you picked is lovely!

BlueStarsAtNight Wed 12-Feb-14 09:13:16

I adore the name Greta, I hadn't heard or thought of it for years but suddenly I feel like it needs to go on my list!

I wouldn't worry about people's reactions, especially those of your parents generation - names were so different in their day that they can't always get over the fact that times change and so do people's choices. My parents didn't like my DC's name at all as it is an old-fashioned type name, but everyone my age seems to love it!

If you have no other name in mind is say keep it, Etty and Etta are gorgeous nn's and Greta is just lovely

Greta is beautiful. I don't think it is harsh at all. My dd has a cutesy name which gets complimented a lot but I sometimes wonder if we should have gone more grown up.
I have taken to naming ornaments and dd's cuddly toys (complete with middle names) to satisfy my urge to use other name combinations shock

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