Has anyone gone with a name they just 'kind of like'......(25 Posts)
I'm currently 20+6 and ever since we first got our BFP me and DH started discussing names. We had a lovely list of girl's names but only 1 or 2 on the Boy's List and they were nothing we felt very strongly about. As Sod's Law would have it, we found put 4 weeks ago that we are having a boy and although we are over the moon, the issue of a name is getting to us.
We just can't find anything where we think, "That's brilliant, I love it!" When either of us suggest anything the typical response is, "It's ok" and no enthusiasm can be mustered. I know we have a way to go until baby is born but it is concerning me. We have pretty much stopped talking about names now as it seems so pointless.
Has anyone gone with a name they they didn't love but neither did they hate and not gone on to regret it??
Now you know it's a boy, it will probably help concentrate your mind, and you can discard the girl list and channel your energy into a boy's name. I think twenty weeks is far too early to panic about not finding a single male name you really like.
I think we had more potential girl names in mind too, before the scan revealed a boy at eighteen weeks. I actually came up with his name a month or so later in a blinding flash on the way home from work. We still love it.
Don't know about going to to name the baby as I'm only 12+3, but dp and I have picked a boys name and a girls name out already.
Same as you neither of us had any hugely strong feelings about a boys name, just "I like that" "It's ok" etc. But then DP suggested a name that neither of us had considered before and I went to immediately say "no" but then he suggested a shortened version which I also had not considered, but it made me pause a little... Then we played around with the name for quite a while putting it with our family middle names and last name and trying it out with our chosen girls name (as we'd like one of each really!) and I grew to really like it, so we picked it as number 1 boys name, even though I still didn't LOVE it. That was a couple of weeks ago now, and I cannot imagine calling our baby anything else if it was a boy! I have really got the name stuck in my head and it's become perfect
So don't necessarily just say no to names that aren't "amazing", play with them and you might be surprised what you get attached to!
BTW the name we chose for a boy is Frederick, Freddy for short, and right now I can imagine using it if we have a boy and always being happy with our choice
If you like more girls name why not look at unisex names that you like that could be for either and then you gots your boys name!
My cousin and his partner just had a little boy and called it Freddie
The most 'helpful' suggestion my husband has had is Rocky!!
He thinks he is being funny but he's just irritating
I have, one of our twins has a name neither me or dh were particularly ecstatic about but went with it as it fits with his twin brother's name and his sister's name. However, now he has it it is PERFECT for him and I actually get way more compliments on his name than the others. Not that that matters.
Didn't love my DD2's name (we used ALL our favourite names on DD1, d'oh) but it was a happy compromise between my wild names and DH's staid ones.
Do I absolutely love it now? Well not really, but it is absolutely hers, it absolutely suits her, and is therefore part of her and as I love her I wouldn't have it any other way. IYSWIM
My point is the amount of angst we all put into names and then they just become a very small part attached to the huge wonderfulness that is your child.
It's very new, this massive angst over names. Call your child something you like and which won't cause him a a second's inconvenience, embarrassment or difficulty,then settle down to enjoy the wonderful, unique, amazing person he will be. Even if he was called Tom, or whatever the current top of the most popular list is. You don't need a unique name to make him unique- he will be anyway.
I would say we fit your criteria! The boy names I loved, DH didn't. So we ended up with a choice of 2 and decided we'd pick one or other depending on what he looked like when he came out (we also had girls' names on standby because we didn't know what we were having). He looked more like choice A than choice B so that's what he was called!
But for some time I wasn't sure that it was exactly the right name for him (although I've never disliked it) - but now it IS him completely and I'm very happy that it is his name.
DS2 - DH suddenly decided to tell me that he really loved a particular boys' name, which was one I also loved but could have sworn that DH had vetoed the first time around!
Anyway, it was far too similar to DS1's name for us to use it, so it's DS2's middle name instead and we picked another name that we both liked for DS2's first name.
I agree with curlew too, just wish id had her wisdom when naming DD!
I do think you and your dh have to really like the name and it has to go with your surname.
Everyone has different tastes and some people would rather their child wasn't one of 3 or 4 other little Jack or Harrys, but I don't think anyone is looking for a 'unique' name. Have a look at the ONS lists which list ALL boys names given last year - there must be one that your dh and you love!!
And remember, YOU have to love it, not us. Our ds has a name that was used about 15 times and is therefore, by definition, not loved by everyone, but we love it and it goes really well with his surname.
We didn't 'love' the name we chose for ds. I suggested the name Ben, dh liked it, and then we just couldn't think of anything we liked more (we found boys names harder than girls) so it stuck. But now I can't imagine him being called anything else and I love it because it is him.
Now were expecting dd1 and have a list of lots of names that are all ok. But I don't love them yet. Funnily enough we is the boys name picked pretty quickly.
We had a similar problem in that we agreed on boys names but had completely different ideas for girls. As luck would have it we found out we were having a girl, and then spent the next 20 weeks arguing about names. It really got me down and I was very upset about not giving DD a name I loved.
Then our DD was born- she was critically ill at birth and went straight into intensive care before either of us even got to hold her. DH and I were exhausted and stressed but I felt it was very important she have a name straight away to give her a proper identity. We had a short list we were both ok with and chose one from there. Neither of us had any fight in us and it was an easy decision.
...9 months on and I abs
Arghh posted too soon!
... I absolutely adore her name! It is exactly her and I can't imagine her being called anything else. Now I worry about finding another name I love as much for DC2!
I guess the point is once you give your child a name, it becomes part of them and you will love it for that reason.
Good luck x
Curlew, such wise words. I wish I'd had your sensible clarity of mind when pg!
We have g/b twins last year, and love DS's name but still feel meh about DD's. We had v different tastes in girls names so had to come up with a compromise list, then got rushed into picking one while I and they were still v ill. Tbh it bothered me quite a bit, but lately I've come to realise that her name doesn't even matter in the scheme of things. She is a lovely, sweet, beautiful little girl and would still be all those things even if I'd called her Grotbags.
Grotbags, now that's unique.
Grotbags Rose, I like it
We agreed DH could think of boy names and I could pick girl names. As luck would have it we had a boy.
DH had produced a list of such monumental battyness (Gartnait and Alpen are two I remember) that I vetoed everything down to his fifth choice, which was James.
Its fair to say neither of us were crazy about it but its a workable name that won't make him feel like a freak at school.
We call him Jimmy for sort- which is cute and even a bit voguish in a reclaimed-old-fashioned-name type way.
Now the name is just what our son is called- so of course we love it
Exact same thing happened to us- loads of girl names ready... boy born yesterday! now no name is good enough! We want something interesting to go with a surname that ends in a uh sound - as in baker.
Any suggestions gratefully received, the bloody bounty lady suggested a few this morning trying to make a sale!
Ooh congratulations!! What's on your short-list? My advice would be take your time, don't rush into it.
Ds3 & 5 have names I just liked. Ds3 is 2.8 now and his name has grown on me and I think it really suits him. Ds5 is 9 months and I still just like it, my dn cant say it though and has given him a nn which seems to have stuck
I didn't even pick out a name until after he was born. XH suggested one, we tried it for a day, didn't stick, the next one was more of a fit. No anxsting about it for months and months! And I'm 100% happy with it. Relax, whatever name you choose will become him when he's born. I don't like naming babies in the womb, it's too abstract for me. Once you have a solid, real baby to name it will become easier.
Our short list so far is:
Hubby really likes Kian but it's the one I'm least keen on....
We had a girls name we loved and a boys name we liked but were worried as we weren't as sure about it as the girls name. We went back & had a look through lists & books & just couldn't find a name we liked better than the one we had so that helped to reassure us. And then we had a girl!
You have ages yet, I would just keep an eye out for alternatives, jot any possibles down and come back to it with your other half in a few weeks. Asking for suggestions on this board may also throw up some ideas you hadn't thought of.
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