Daughter is 5, but people are now confessing they don't like her name!

(72 Posts)
TangoPurple Tue 20-Nov-12 13:36:59

My little girl is called Tyra (Marie is her middle name).

When i was pregnant, i had the name Megan picked out if I had a girl. But when she was born, she just didn't suit it.

Then when she was a few days old, I came across this name in a baby name book, and I fell in love with it. DD suited it so much.

Since then, I've been faced with comments such as 'ohh, very unusual - never heard of it before' and 'Tya? Tyler? Tiara?' 'Did you call her that after Tyra Banks? (this is a very popular comment). But now she's started school, the comments are getting a bit strong. One mum actually said 'Isn't that a black person's name?'.

I'm actually getting so paranoid now about calling her name when we're out in public. There's another girl in dd's year called Beyonce, and I heard a mum say the other day (she was standing in front of me at home time) say: "Oh, here comes Tyra Banks and Beyonce', then start laughing derisively with her pal.

My daughter loves her name and so do I. But I now feel like I've cursed her with a name she's going to be made to feel silly about.

It's actually from the name Thyra which is originally Scandinavian. I hadn't even heard of Tyra Banks until I got to the registry office and the registrar told me about her.

Please make me feel better! (Or just give me your opinions. I can take them. Honest).

MolotovCocktail Tue 20-Nov-12 14:31:06

Hmmm ... The problem is clearly to do with other's misinformed ideas about names that should be given, and give clues about one's ethnicity. I assume it's the 'isn't that a black persons name?' are comments that bother you the most. Those comments manage to be insulting on so many levels.

It's ridiculous. Some friends of mine are Indian and their kids do not have Indian names. My kids don't have Irish names (we're Irish). So what?

Ignore these very thoughtless and obviously ignorant people. If you get comments like that, direct the comment back to them e.g.

"Tyra: isn't that a black persons name?"
"No. Tyra is Scandinavian. But tell me, what names are typically 'black?'"

Rhubarbgarden Tue 20-Nov-12 14:32:18

If people want to be rude, they'll find something to be rude about. I've had "Oh, after her off Coronation Street?!" <snigger> about my dd's name (Audrey). My response is "Sorry I don't watch soaps, I don't know to whom are referring. Perhaps you haven't heard of Audrey Hepburn, international icon and United Nations ambassador" followed by a pitying look. You should definitely use the line about the goddess as suggested above.

nickelrocketgoBooooooom Tue 20-Nov-12 14:32:26

I like it.

i've never heard of Tyra Banks.

MolotovCocktail Tue 20-Nov-12 14:35:22

Agree DontMind has the right idea with the patronising comment smile

superstarheartbreaker Tue 20-Nov-12 14:35:36

But Tyra Banks is stunning and georgeous. So what if that's who people think of?My name sounds like another famous model's name. I think it is racial prejudice and ignorance op. It's a lovely name. Keep it.

nilbyname Tue 20-Nov-12 14:37:16

IMO it is not a name I particularly like for a little girl, it sounds too adult, so she will grow into it I guess! The comments the other mums have made a silly and rude.

My DD has a more unusual name, and I often have to repeat it, get asked why we chose it and so on. Yawn. It is just a lovely name to us.

If your DD likes her name, then so what?! It would be different if she was being teased about it perhaps.

amck5700 Tue 20-Nov-12 14:37:50

I went to school with a girl called Tyra and I'm 46. She wasn't black either.

Have people not got enough to worry about in their own lives that they have time to bother about your daughters name?

It's a lovely name - and to be honest there will always be someone famous with whatever name you choose.........although I am sure Mr & Mrs Duck were cursing Walt Disney after they had named there son Donald.

I thought of Tyra Banks, the model.

I think it's an ace name. Different, but easy to spell! (that's coming from someone with a very very weird name).

quietlysuggests Tue 20-Nov-12 14:38:30

Has your dd just started school?
If so, I would move thsi from the "people dont like her name" category and put it firmly into the "people at the school gates have to have an opinion on everything" category.
Its a whole new world, like being pregnant for the first time you suddenly meet all these randomers saying rude things - its started up again with school
So, ignore.
Its is a beautiful name.

ShipwreckedAndComatose Tue 20-Nov-12 14:39:49

Same nickel...that's exactly what I was going to post!!

I remember naming my dd after my granny as she was terminally ill at the time and it was a perfect way of communicating something to her as I could not visit her. The name meant so much to me but its quite a common name and I can remember the midwife saying 'oh, what a sensible name!'

At the time, I felt it quite a put down as it tapped into a worry I had that the name might be a bit dull. Now I realise it wasn't meant that way. DD is seven and loves her name and I stick by my choice!!

What I am trying to say is that you'll never please everyone..so why bother trying. As long as you and dd love it, screw everyone else!!

LtEveDallas Tue 20-Nov-12 14:40:35

It's a lovely name OP. Time to release your inner actress:

"Actually it comes from the Scandinavian Thyra. Who on earth is Tyra Banks?" confused

(and when they explain)

"Really? How very umm, bizarre, to think I would name my child after her. Do people really do that?"

Mintyy Tue 20-Nov-12 14:41:29

Fwiw I think its a lovely name.

Halfling Tue 20-Nov-12 14:44:15

Change it to Thyra then. Or something else you fancy.

I think that you can not go around enlightening everyone and changing their opinions. And names do convey a first impression so if you are getting a strong response in your community to your DD's name, maybe you should do something about it.

Personally, I quite like the name Tyra, though I immediately associate it with Tyra Banks. And that is not a bad thing IMO.

I went to school with a Tyra... love it!

I find it amazing that people would make comments like that. Tyra Banks - SO WHAT!? i know who she is and it was not my first thought when I saw the name. I just think it's similar to Tara which is also a lovely name and I would not associate either as 'black names' or keep commenting on Tyra Banks when I heard it!

There are plenty of children with names shared by famous people, I am shocked that other adults would be so focussed on that and so rude.

Who are these people?! I'm sure you could think of some equally irrelevant petty connotation for their children's names but you don't because you're not demented.
Ignore them, ignore ignore.

mayihaveaboxofchoculaits Tue 20-Nov-12 14:53:21

Its a lovely name for an obviously lovely little girl.
You could choose any name and you will run into people who feel they can pronouce judgement.
This is less about your good choice, and more about the ignorant harpies who dont have good grace and kindness .

MmeLindor Tue 20-Nov-12 14:53:21

Banks is the hostess, judge and executive producer of The CW Television Network show America's Next Top Model. In addition, she hosted The Tyra Banks Show, a daytime talk show aimed at younger women, which premiered on September 12, 2005, and ran until May 28, 2010.

from Wiki

She also founded TZONE Foundation and a Tyla Banks Scholarship.

When I read the name, I didn't immediately think of her, just thought the name was pretty, but really - she is not a bad role model.

mercibucket Tue 20-Nov-12 14:53:40

Yup, go with 'who?'. Oh the things you learn about popular culture

I'd never heard of tyra banks

YoullScreamAboutItOneDay Tue 20-Nov-12 15:59:02

I have vaguely heard of Tyra Banks.

I think it's fine. TBH, I think people telling you it is a black person's name are just being racist.

I think you need to get all haughty, as others have suggested "As in Tyra Banks? To, as in the Danish warrior queen".

MummyAbroad Tue 20-Nov-12 16:10:59

I cant believe how rude those ladies were! I really think you should "Did you mean to be so rude?" them at least or just mercilessly take the piss out of their names and their DC's

I have an unusual name, and it makes everyone think of one particular 1970's actress, I am so used to people associating my name with her, it has never done me any harm, in fact I really like that I have an unusual name - who wants to be ordinary?

I am sure your daughter will love her unusualness too as she grows up, but for the meantime, show her how you deal with rudeness, thats an important life skill too!

(by the way, I much prefer Tyra to Megan)

TangoPurple Tue 20-Nov-12 16:14:07

Thanks so much, everyone!

I'm a tad over-sensitive about everything, so this has been getting me quite emotional lately.

I know who Tyra Banks is, and she seems to be a fantastic role model etc, but i just don't like the judgmental tone that comes with 'Did you name her after Tyra Banks?', as if naming a child after a celeb is something a bit embarrasing.

I don't want to change her name to Thyra, or anything else. I love Tyra and so does she. But I think I need to learn to accept that not everyone else will/does.

I feel a lot better now. Thanks again!

Gwennan Tue 20-Nov-12 16:19:01

Nameberry.com says of Tyra:
High profile supermodel/entrepreneur Tyra Banks has put this name in the spotlight, endowing it with her confident, superattractive image.

Sums up what I thought too!

Floggingmolly Tue 20-Nov-12 16:29:38

I'm surprised you're getting so many comments, whether people like the name or not. You must know lots of rude people grin
There's a girl at school with one of my kids called Tatianna Paris (double barrelled first name) and OTT as I've always found it, it invites absolutely no negative comments at all.

MrsSnow Tue 20-Nov-12 17:10:17

Maybe concentrate on the origins of the name Tahira (which is often shortened to Tyra) which means pure and virtuous in Arabic, rather than Tyra banks.

Alisvolatpropiis Tue 20-Nov-12 17:18:20

I can't believe how rude your "friends" are being. Wtf does she mean by "isn't that a black persons name"? That comes across as being the comment of a pretty racist person to be honest.

Tyra is lovely. Yes Tyra Banks is famous but she's by no means a bad role model. Quite the opposite.

If I were you I would say something back.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now