Feeling awful

[thatdarncat]

DD2 is 15 weeks. I scored 9 on EDPS at 6 week check and at 13 week check was still scoring 9. Discussed how I was feeling with HV and she said she would call me in a month to see how I was.
However the past week I have been feeling markedly worse. I've went from irritable and aggressive with high demands on myself to despair, crying, anxiety, guilt and the feeling I am doing nothing right. I haven't washed in 2 days. I'm not playing enough with my baby as I have no energy and so I'm worried that she's not developing properly. I have headaches and stomach pains. I had panic attacks when I was out with my parents and the kids at the weekend (whilst in the toilet - they know nothing of how I'm feeling). I feel very isolated as H works away and I have no family near, friends live far away and I couldn't confude in them anyway. It's all a mess. I don't actually know what I'm hoping to achieve by posting I'm just fed up of feeling like this and wanting to scream to people to help me but I don't even know how to help myself. I can't even face going to the GP.

[Duckstar]

I suffered prenatal anxiety with DC3. It was the most horrendous time of my life, but you do need to see your GP. You say you don't know how to help yourself. You don't need to do this alone or by yourself. There are amazing treatments and therapy out there. If you cant face your GP can you ring the duty line for the HV team and ask to speak to someone? My HV has been amazing and supportive. Can you tell your parents? Can you tell your DH? You don't have to suffer, please reach out to someone.