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Our Antenatal and Postnatal Depression forum is a supportive space where you can share your postnatal depression experiences.

Antenatal/postnatal depression

Please tell me this is normal!

2 replies

maskingtherealme · 06/03/2015 22:05

Sorry for posting her as it isn't really PND related but more 'baby blues' - I hope!

I had an ELCS a week ago in which I delivered DD1 at 36 weeks. She was born healthy. I was delivered early due to problems with the pregnancy. I had the same problems in my first pregnancy with DS1 but these were only picked up by chance at a 'routine' san at 36 weeks to check the position of the placenta. After my ELCS, the surgeon came in to inform me that they had spotted a 'problem' with my uterus. It was a lot thinner than it should be and they said another pregnancy would mean a definite ELCS at about 34-36 weeks.

Now DH and I had decided that 2 children was enough and DD1 was always going to be our last child. But on hearing the surgeon's news about the health, or lack of, of my uterus, I have found myself crying about it. It is as though the choice has been ripped away from me. The surgeon has never said we can't have anymore childen but DH and I did discuss what he said and decided that another pregnancy would be too risky (heightened risk of uterine rupture - had one with DS1) and we would be anxious and terrified during the whole thing!

I am struggling to accept that DD1 is our last child. I feel like a huge part of my life has now ended and I would never experience it again. I feel quite distraught about it at times (I will say that mundane things are making me cry too).

I am putting this down to 'baby blues' but need to know how to 'snap myself out' of feeling so 'bereaved'!

OP posts:
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Stealthpolarbear · 06/03/2015 22:08

congratulations :o
I think it's perfectly normal to mourn your lCk of choice. you don't need to snap out of it. but if you're worried or its spoiling your first few days with your new dd, talk to your hv or gp

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fruitpastille · 06/03/2015 22:16

I don't think you need to 'snap out of it'. It's ok to feel sad. The same news was given to me at my third section last year and I still felt funny about it even though dc3 was a really, really final one. I actually felt a bit better after dh had a vasectomy - as well as feelingsafe from the risk of a dangerous pregnancy I feel like we are a bit more 'equal'. How you are reacting seems pretty normal in the circumstances but could you maybe chat to your surgeon a bit more about the risks?

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