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Our Antenatal and Postnatal Depression forum is a supportive space where you can share your postnatal depression experiences.

Antenatal/postnatal depression

Please tell me other people feel this way!

2 replies

Singlegaymumofonetoddler · 10/02/2015 18:07

Hello, my quick background is that I'm a single mum to a 23 month old girl. She's always been a brilliant, easy child. She sleeps, eats, behaves, is healthy and happy and gorgeous. She's a sperm donor baby so I had her on my own very much by choice. She's everything I ever wanted in a daughter, although is not affectionate which may be part of the problem.
I feel like such an ungrateful, awful mum, all of the time.
I can look at her all day and half of me thinks she's absolutely amazing but at the same time I feel nothing. I don't think I'm bonded to her and consequently I can't play with her and feel utterly despairing. I try and cuddle her a lot but she pushes me off. We read books together which is about as close as we get. I 'enjoy' her fleetingly, as in I like hearing her learn new words, laugh when she's funny and love dressing her and teaching her new things. But I have this underlying feeling of a disconnection. I love her in my own way, but I suspect not in the way most mums do. I just can't believe I have got exactly what I always wanted (a lovely happy healthy little girl) and now I have her I am just not feeling it.
Anyone else feel this way? What can I do?

OP posts:
ReluctantCamper · 10/02/2015 20:57

I'm really sorry you feel this way. I don't have any practical advice really, but didn't want to read and run. It does sound to me like you could be suffering from depression. Have you considered visiting your GP?

Mumblepot26 · 12/02/2015 00:08

I would second that, please consider seeing your GP

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