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Our Antenatal and Postnatal Depression forum is a supportive space where you can share your postnatal depression experiences.

Antenatal/postnatal depression

Depression and Anxiety....I don't know if I can cope?

3 replies

Lost31 · 13/10/2014 15:58

Hi,

I'm 8 weeks 4 days and don't know how to cope. Does anybody else feel like this? Or has anybody experienced this and got through it?? I feel so alone and lost and terrified despite having a wonderful boyfriend who does everything to help.

This was planned but I didn't expect anything like this: I feel so so down and like I am stuck in a nightmare and nothing I do helps. I feel constantly sick, lightheaded, tired crying all the time and all food is repulsive! I'm wasting my life lying down all day (signed off sick for 2 weeks) and just want to feel like myself again. The only way of escape that comes to mind is having an abortion, which I don't want to do. I keep telling myself that it might get better in a few weeks but freak out incase it doesn't or incase it gets worse (depression and anxiety) and I know I literally couldn't live with it. By then I couldn't possibly have an abortion. I feel like I am in hell.

I have tried being positive and try and think positive things but can't shake this heavy foggy feeling in my head. I wake up every morning feeling like I don't want to be here. I have had a rough year (2 deaths of people very close to m me and moved into new house the month I got pregnant etc) and have previously experienced anxiety and depression throughout my life and don't know if this is just part of the hormones in the first trimester and it will go away eventually or if the hormones will increase and make it worse?

I also am extremely terrified of birth! The first week I found out I was pregnant I was kind of excited but now I feel absolutely nothing and try to feel excited and look to the future and think it's worth it for a baby but inside I don't truly feel that. How can wverything change in a couple of months? I was fine :(

So sorry for the negative post but I just want to be honest and hope that someone can relate and share some positive story or advice on how to cope??

Thanks

C

OP posts:
HappyNap · 13/10/2014 16:07

I was almost exactly like you describe. I considered abortion too. The 1st thing I did was I took one month sick leave, and then packed my bags and went to my parents to live with them for 1 month. It was the best thing I did.

At 12 weeks things changed. I started feeling much better. And I even enjoyed my pregnancy.

N1982 · 27/10/2014 16:24

Sorry this is so late but went through same exact thing. It didn't last and was fine when baby was born. However now pregnant again and suffering similar. Got to be hormones. Hope you are ok?

FeverDreams · 12/12/2014 16:30

OP

I'm so sorry to hear that you are/were feeling so depressed. I hope you're still checking these responses and getting help for your problems. I'm really glad you've been honest and open, holding it all inside will only make it worse.

You have a lot of reasons to feel the way that you do and I don't think you should feel ashamed, you're experiencing both death and the creation of new life in a short space of time. These things are very emotionally and physically taxing.

When your hormones are going haywire during pregnancy it is extremely common to have such low mood and especially if you were prone to depression and anxiety before falling pregnant.

I would strongly recommend counselling, it can be difficult to talk to loved ones because they care about you so much so an impartial, professional voice can really do a world of good. I work for an anonymous online counselling service PlusGuidance.com and would recommend it anybody going through any kind of difficulty. You can choose which counsellor to speak to and you don't have to be stuck on any kind of waiting list. Also, your first session is free.

I really hope this finds you well and that you find some inner peace soon.
Warm wishes

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