I was 27 when I found out I was pregnant!!! I had only been with my BF 6 weeks. OMG I was so shocked!!! I spoke to my mum who told me it was a gift from above. ( My mum and I lived next to each other so it would be great for babysitting. ) I lived in a nice flat. I Had job, great social life. I thought I could never do it as it was such a whirlwind. Well on 23rd October 2007 my mum died!! I was 6 months gone and my world collapsed. Apparently your body does not allow you to grieve when your pregnant? So 8 weeks after my son was born I became very unwell with panic attacks and very very bad thoughts. I detached myself from my son. I did not want to go near him I wanted to be with my beautiful mum. to cut a long story short. I was very ill PND. ( the details are a but grim to put on her but trust me the dark days where very very dark. I had no feeling for anything, anyone. I was having upto 20 panic attacks a day. I was so drained from it all. I ended up in a bad situation which resorted in medical intervention. I was placed on medication to relax me from the panic attack and a high dose of SSRI's. I was assessed everyday from a medical phyc team. I was very unwell for 9months but thankfully I had a BF and two big sisters who looked after us. I took a year off work sick as well as my mat leave. Time is a great healer.. I never thought I would get through those god awful days of me not leaving my flat due to fear. But I did and now my son is 5 and Im due another on my mums birthday. Don't get me wrong I am scared shi**less incase I get ill again, but I know every cloud has a silver lining. Without PDN I would not be the strong mum I am today. I need to shout this next bit.
LADIES YOU WILL GET THROUGH YOUR DARK DAYS BECAUSE I DID AND YOU WILL... THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO CAN AND WILL HELP YOU. XXX PS I STILL HAVE OFF DAYS BUT WHO CARES X X XX STAY STRONG YOUR CHILDREN AND PARTNERS NEED YOU MORE THAN YOU EVER KNOW XXX
Wow, what a wonderful encouraging story. So sorry for what you went through, you have a beautiful child now and Im glad it worked out in the end. Im sure you wont get ill again, and if you ever did you sound like your self help seeking skills were brilliant so you will be ok I think.
Thanks for sharing this story. I'm soo depressed and have these dark days every day!!! Having awful thoughts and hopelessness my daughter needs me more then ever right now but this depression is taking over my life. I'm on citalopram I'm hoping this works, and can u tell me what PDN is??