Normal worries or too much?

(6 Posts)
noting Mon 26-Nov-12 16:33:38

I have a history of depression and anxiety, and am currently pg with my first child, after ttc for a long time and finally giving up, so this came as a surprise. I expected to be over the moon but I am terrified, crying and worried all the time - I am only 8 weeks and don't know how I can continue.

I'm convinced that everything I do, eat and drink have caused the child to have severe problems. The GP referred me for an early scan at 6 weeks and everything was fine, but then I found out that drinking too much green tea can stop the intake of folic acid - and I drank a lot of green tea and wasn't taking folic acid until 5 weeks.

Is it normal to have these worries or am I overreacting? I know there's nothing I can do but wait for the tests, but in the meantime I feel like I am going mad and keep on having panic attacks, and then I think that's just worse for the baby and before I know it I'm in a complete state and the day is a mess. I'm self employed and losing work because I spend all day crying in bed or have to cancel meetings because I think I've killed my baby. I don't want to tell anyone about it as all my friends have healthy happy children and wouldn't understand why I'm worried.

Has this happened to anyone else? Are there any books you could recommend to help deal with the anxiety? I don't want to go to the GP again because there's nothing she can do and I felt like I was wasting everyone's time last time.

carocaro Mon 26-Nov-12 18:28:21

You just have to be very stern with yourself and think that if you don't find ways to calm down, you could and I really mean could be harmfull to your baby.

There are no reasons why your child will be disabled, and too much green tea and not taking folic acid won't be reasons. I did not take folic acid with mine as I had morning sickness and tablets made me feel worse.

It is normal to be worried and have concerns but yours seem very severve. Your GP can do something and you need to go back to her and explain how you are feeling but without any help the situation is not going to improve. Your midwife should be able to help also. You will not be wasting anyones time at all. Just sitting and talking it all through will help.

I was pregnant with DS2, and so worried after 2 m/c, and I read about an Australian sky diver whoose shoot did not open and slammed into a tree, she broke some bones and had consussion and in hospital discovered she was pregnant and went on to have a healthy baby girl. The womb and body are so protective and amazing. This story made me feel so much better.

PLease make an appt with you GP ASAP.

noting Mon 26-Nov-12 21:11:54

wow, that is an incredible story. Thanks. You're right, I need to get a grip. It all seems too much sometimes. I just wish there was someone to talk to - I've been down the route of NHS mental health services before and really don't believe there is anything in there that can help. But I will remember that story and try to keep things in perspective - thanks.

Damash12 Sun 02-Dec-12 07:25:44

Hi I'm 31 weeks and have suffered terrible anxiety through most if this pregnancy. I think the surge in hormones has a alot to blame. I can simply cry over anything. I too am anxious about the baby being ok, this is normal and probably because the baby is so precious to us. I started taking citalapram about 4 weeks before I caught and was advised to continue until 20 weeks but this as caused further worry but I am trying to be as calm as possible as I think anxiety may hurt the baby too. Good luck and do see your doctor if it gets really bad.

FadBook Sun 02-Dec-12 07:43:15

Pregnancy is such an exhausting time as you do constantly worry and think of the worse case scenario.

It does sound unusual to be crying so much and worrying, but with a history of anxiety, it may be that your hormones are playing havoc, which is causing you anxiety.

I readthis website when I was pregnant as I too worried constantly in the first trimester. There is a lot of information and resource on there and it felt nice to read stories from others which made me feel I wasn't alone.

Similar to you, we struggled to have babies and had IVF in the end, so you feel an enormous amount if pressure for everything to be "ok".

I'm not really making much sense but wanted to let you know that you are not alone and there will be others out there who feel the same. The first trimester is rough (I was sick until 17 weeks daily despite people telling me it would ease off at 12 weeks envy) and I can tell you that once that sickness and tiredness eased off, trimester 2 and 3 were amazing for me. I finally felt contented and happy with whatever would be thrown at me (had similar thoughts to yourself that I would have a problem with birth or a child with defects). By t2 I felt prepared and happy with my body doing what it should be doing (growing a baby).

It sounds like things are so hard for you at the moment. Try to be kind to yourself & know that your body knows what to do to keep your baby safe. I would definitely go back to your GP. They won't think that your wasting their time but they could refer you for counselling which may be really helpful to get all these unhelpful thoughts out. Good luck OP, hope you get the help you need & can enjoy being pregnant & look forward to being a Mummy soon smile

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