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March 2014 - Thread 4 - awaiting our dating scans

(1000 Posts)
MTBMummy Tue 13-Aug-13 09:40:11

Stats thread here Here

PiratesMam Tue 13-Aug-13 10:04:04

Thanks MTB! grin can't believe we're on the 4th already.

liberuna Tue 13-Aug-13 10:11:45

Hi all
i've got my first appointment with midwife today but scan isn't until 29 Aug.

Want to wait for scan before telling anyone (apart from OH) so thank you all for being here because I'm about to burst. This is my first pregnancy.

How work hasn't figured out I don't know as I'm having "emergency bathroom breaks" through out the day

Wow! so in the time I've been trying to catch up on the last couple of threads a new one has started.

rosyryan Tue 13-Aug-13 10:12:07

Just checking in. Still feeling completely wiped out - and still nearly a month to go until my scan! Boo.

commsgirl Tue 13-Aug-13 10:42:46

Checking in. Can't believe we're on thread four already!

FoxMulder Tue 13-Aug-13 10:53:26

Hi everyone, I've been awol for a while with horrendous morning sickness. I've been good for nothing but lying in bed cursing God, not even loading up mumsnet! Oh God, it's hideous. My mum is on her way up to look after me smile. When it's bad (like yesterday) I can't even get out of bed to get food all day. It's not that I'm actually puking all that often, but I feel like death. And now my boss is saying he's taking 5 days holiday off me! Can he do that? I don't think he is trying to be an arse about it, but I've been off for so long now (10 days and counting) that he needs to do something. He says it's that or start paying me SSP.

Anyway, good news is I had a scan last week that put me at 7+4 (8+3 today). It was crazy seeing the little bean's heart beating.

MortifiedAdams Tue 13-Aug-13 10:55:34

Wow! thread four already. Think I totally bypassed thread three - it came and went to fast grin

Got.my dating scan 30th August.

I had a dreadful week nine - totally floored by work.and tiredness. Dh was pretty much in sole charge of dd amd I missed them.both so much but I feel much more awake and healthy now!

MortifiedAdams Tue 13-Aug-13 10:56:38

Fox pregnancy related illness cannot and should not be counted as Sick Leave. It is wholly illegal for him to do that!

Fox, I'm pretty sure Mortified is right and that your boss cannot do that to you. Does he know you are pregnant?

11 weeks today and still no sign of scan date! I called the midwives yesterday but had to leave a message in their "we'll call back within 48 hours" answer phone hmm

I have a two hour Business Finance exam this afternoon, oh deep joy! I've been reading and revising for the last week but nothing feels like it is sinking in!

Beccadugs Tue 13-Aug-13 11:02:53

Place marking...

WOW thread 4, and no ones hit 12 weeks yet. We might make 12 threads by the end!!

greymoose Tue 13-Aug-13 11:21:09

thanks jk i thought it was a bit early, i have my booking in in two weeks so will see how it goes and mention it then !

gawjus i think thats a good idea to make one for the group - it could be a good starting point for you to ease him into maybe having a proper one if you did want one too, out of interest does he not use Facebook either?

also interested in home birth but don't think i have the guts (my family seems to have small babies / pregnancies varying from slightly dodgy to full blown eclampsia etc) just incase!

definitely interested in water birth though, does anyone know if you can take your own birthing pool in incase theirs are all full? i know it sounds silly but just want to be in the water for labour if possible even if i cant give birth in it!

glad to hear the annoyingness of pregnancy is fading for some of us, cant wait for this glowy business to start!

FoxMulder Tue 13-Aug-13 11:24:44

Yeah, he knows. I can't find anything official to say he's gotta pay me though. Maternity action says "Your employer should record any pregnancy-related sickness absence separately from other sick leave, so that pregnancy-related sickness absence is not used as a reason for disciplinary action, dismissal or redundancy." and "You are entitled to receive the same sick pay as other employees" which I guess I've had already

greymoose Tue 13-Aug-13 11:25:11

also sorry for spam on thread 3 thought it might be easier than people adding messages there!

faithfulandtruthful Tue 13-Aug-13 11:25:19

Grey It is an idea, I'm not sure that they would go for it though! Worth asking I guess. Do you have a choice of hospitals? Maybe you could choose the one where you were most likely to get to use a birth pool.

F&T

mimili Tue 13-Aug-13 11:29:52

frankenfoal I'm worried I wont get a scan date in good time either. My unit has an email address so if I have nothing by Thursday I might drop them a polite little enquiry. Perhaps you could do the same?

mimili Tue 13-Aug-13 11:31:51

frank spelling errors on your name! sorry!

faithfulandtruthful Tue 13-Aug-13 11:34:56

Frank and mimili I haven't had anything about my scan but my booking appointment was only last Thursday, I am keeping my fingers crossed I'm not in your position in a weeks time hmm (when I am 11 weeks). Hope you guys get it sorted soon.

F&T

MummyPig24 Tue 13-Aug-13 11:36:39

I just received a letter giving me another scan date. 31st August. I called to see which was correct and they said I could choose, obviously I chose the earlier one! It's my dads birthday that day so will have to do some creative juggling of our time but I expect we will do dinner with him that day.

x0gawjus0x Tue 13-Aug-13 11:41:32

I will def make one for group when im home grey smile yes he has one, he asked me if i wanted him to get rid of it so its fair but im hoping if u show him i trust him it will help him with me :-)

Anyone got advice on hair bleach i really need a full head of highlights done roots are bad tryin to hold on for nxt week will it be ok after 12 weeks? X

greymoose Tue 13-Aug-13 11:43:01

f&t i'm honestly not sure about choices, hopefully they'd be up for it if not! we'll see - i know i sound bratty but unless i have water (or there is an emergency) i think id be really nervous for some reason!

MortifiedAdams Tue 13-Aug-13 11:44:04

IM.another one considering water birth and our local.hospital only has one pool, however my MW said it is very rarely used, almost noone in our area requests a water birth. Fingers crossed.it is quiet for my delivery time too. Means I will probably have all and sundry in the suite with me as a lot of the MWs havent done/seen a waterbirth at that hospital.

The thought of.minimal interference is the biggest appeal as I despised beyond beleif the internal examinations and was intending on refusing them this time round. The pool will help that!

x0gawjus0x Tue 13-Aug-13 11:46:15

How exciting mummy wat date? Mines 20th smile x

Gawjus, glad your DP is getting help to deal with his issues. Sounds like he's on the right track. My DP has issues with jealousy having been screwed over badly by his ex and the one before. He has trouble believing I won't do the same as they did. I have to reassure him a lot but its getting better with time.

Thanks for all your words of reassurance. I'd convinced myself yesterday that my boobs had got smaller and that was a bad sign but I don't think they have. I'm going to do a test later just to see if the line is still good and strong. I know it won't give me any answers but I might feel better seeing that line again.

greymoose Tue 13-Aug-13 11:56:38

Apprentice, I wouldn't spoil DH's holiday if it were me. Is there a rellie you can take?

Madame, those human hamster balls are identical to me tits sad

I'm currently in a horribly controlling relationship: th'usband has to do exactly what I say grin

Good luck this afternoon, Frank.

Mortified, what's up with the internals? Are you shy?

commsgirl Tue 13-Aug-13 12:43:37

gawjus www.nhs.uk/chq/Pages/949.aspx?CategoryID=54#close
I'm in the same boat as you and trying to hold out until 12 weeks just for my own piece of mind really. My hairdresser recommended I come in for a strand/allergy test beforehand as hair can react differently in pregnancy. Midwife and GP both said it was fine.

fox I don't think he can take holiday off you but I do think its legal for him to start paying you SSP. Might be worth speaking to HR?

grey I know in our hospitals you can't take your own. Definitely worth speaking to your midwife at your booking in about what your options are around where you can give birth.

I've actually just finished a big campaign around home births/MLUs and the benefits etc. Don't think I've managed to convince myself though!

Dabarai Tue 13-Aug-13 12:46:08

Wow, thread 4!

Lyra, seeing line is reassuring imo, i did 6 tests altogether, including the one last week...

The line is there but I think it's less strong. I'm going to get a scan in the morning. I can't wait till the 20th sad

MortifiedAdams Tue 13-Aug-13 13:39:12

Pram I found them incredibly painful. Not so.much the parts of the hand that went in, but the rest of the hand left outside pushing up against me was so so agonising. I didnt need g&a apart from these! Will absoloutley be refusing them in future.

Good for you, Lyra, I'm prayingfor you x

FoxMulder Tue 13-Aug-13 13:54:09

Lyra I think HGC levels are supposed to drop towards the end of the first trimester, don't stress.

commsgirl he gave me the option saying no to him taking the holidays and having SSP instead, but my brain isn't really working lately. I don't really want to be giving up precious holidays (20 days) so early in the holiday year (it goes to the end of March) but then SSP is so low...gah, I don't know. He think's he doing me a favour & is assuming I wont be needing all my holidays what with Mat leave coming up.

Slippersandacuppa Tue 13-Aug-13 13:55:51

Mortified I'm totally with you wrt internal exams. There's no need for them, they increase the risk of infection and I've heard of many mws 'accidentally' sweeping etc without consent. Had loads with my first and none with my last two, and I know which I'd rather. A good midwife should be able to gauge where you're at by watching you. Obviously that is tricky with some people but true for the majority. Mine could tell over the phone. The beauty of having midwives you've built up a relationship with! Pram I'm not even a teensy bit shy - three births and several years of breastfeeding in public have left me without a shred of dignity grin

Thank you Pram.

Fox, really? I didn't know that. I'm trying not to panic until the scan but it's not easy. And my eldest son is upset because his hamster just died. And I've been arguing with my mother and my XP is being a complete bastard. Not a good day all round sad

FoxMulder Tue 13-Aug-13 14:04:26

Yeah, I haven't got the facts sorry but I know you can't take pregnancy tests after so many weeks because it won't show up. Someone else around here will know what I'm talking about.

And sorry about your son's hamster! Oh pets, they have a nasty habit of dying. I cried for hours when my gerbil died. And I'm a grown up. Sort of.

x0gawjus0x Tue 13-Aug-13 14:25:17

Ohh lyra im sure everything is okay im not going to do another test cos ill only worry like you are ive definately seen somewhere after the first trimester it becomes less obvious my friend (23wk) actually got a negative before her 20 week scan!

Thanks for link comms my senior at work keeps asking why i havent had my roots done ahh not long to wait one more week!! X

JustCallMeBaldrick Tue 13-Aug-13 14:29:01

Wow, thread 4 already! Marking my place for my next moan wink

Slippers, thank you for that insight. I shall be on my guard against the fanny inspectors.

IceNoSlice Tue 13-Aug-13 14:50:47

Frankel what are you studying for? Best of luck with your exam.

Lyra I used to have hamsters as a kid. Love the little critters. My parents swapped them over when they died so I thought it was the same one shock. Hope your DS is ok.

Argh my office has loads of biscuits, Indian sweets for Eid, Cadbury's heroes... Not easy to eat sensibly especially when your perma-hungry!

littleABI Tue 13-Aug-13 14:57:30

Wow can't believe so many are coming up for 12 week scans! Mine isn't until Sept 4th! Thinking of you all. Xx

MTBMummy Tue 13-Aug-13 15:01:23

I was discussing this yesterday at my booking in appointment and said "By the time I had been in labor 23 hours, I felt like I'd had every hand in the hospital up my foof, my dignity was long gone"

I'd had a group of students come round and when asked if I minded them having a go at finding the babies head I apparently said "The more the merrier" blush

rosyryan Tue 13-Aug-13 15:05:32

grin

I remember a midwife asking me if I wanted to put my knickers back on and grumbling "no bloody point is there" is a very mardy way blush

IceNoSlice Tue 13-Aug-13 15:10:08

Don't remember foof exams (it's all a bit hazy) but I do remember DH having to persuade me I ought to put some clothes on to walk around the hospital from the MLU to the CLU. I'd been in the birthing pool wearing a tankini top only. Apparently I couldn't see why I might want to cover up in the corridor. blush blush blush

MummyPig24 Tue 13-Aug-13 15:18:00

Gawjus it's August 31st. I will be 11 weeks.

Good luck for today Lyra

x0gawjus0x Tue 13-Aug-13 15:57:34

Ah okay seems like mine is one of the first? Counting down the next 7 days its going too slow im so nervous sad xx

Rockchick1984 Tue 13-Aug-13 15:58:59

Hi all!

Fox and anyone else who may need to know: pregnancy related sickness can't be counted against you eg for disciplinary purposes (obviously only once work know you're pregnant), however it is paid at the same rate as you would normally get, you're not entitled to full pay simply because you are pregnant if you wouldn't get that normally. What are you usually eligible for with sick pay? You can choose to take holiday instead of sick pay if you prefer. Personally if you can afford it, I'd take SSP at the moment and work out when you need full pay to get a good wage weeks 17-25 as the money you are paid in those weeks is what your first 6 weeks mat pay is based on. If you only got SSP in those weeks you will get 6 weeks at 90% of that rather than of your full pay. Hope that makes sense!

Good luck for your scan tomorrow Lyra

Good news - I feel nauseous! Looks like I might have been panicking over nothing. I never thought I'd be glad to feel sick grin

Obviously I've not had a baby, but over the last 3 years of fertility investigations I've lost count if the amount of people that have seen/poked around inside my Foof grin

Ice I'm doing a distance learning degree that is related to my job. I know, I'm insane - full-time job, part-time study and pregnant! Thankfully I've just finished year 3 of 4 and I've had a chat with my tutor about trying to move my final year exams/assignments around so I can get the majority of it done before March!

Frank, when I was at uni when I was 37 one of my class mates was pregnant seemingly throughout our third year. I didn't go to graduation but I believe her teeny tiny newborn was there upstaging everyone. I do remember seeing her squashed behind the tiny desks in where she would be snoozing during interminable classes and thinking she must be fucking nuts smile

Yesterday my lovely but incomprehensible Lebanese GP refused to is a prescription for ongoing pessaries and injections for my pregnancy, attesting that he 'wasn't allowed' and only a consultant can issue these drugs. I told him he was wrong and that I knew he was trying to bullshit me because these particular injections are very expensive and he didn't want to should the cost. All this was lost in translation, of course, but I knew he was irked: he frowned constantly as if All Was Not Well and I knew I didn't have AIDS so... Anyway, I went running to teacher (midwife) to complain and this afternoon I've had a call from the doctor to 'check up on the shortness of breath' and to say there's a prescription waiting for me at the surgery hmm

faithfulandtruthful Tue 13-Aug-13 17:30:33

Frank it sounds as if you are in good training for having a baby, it involves lots of life juggling and not much rest!! I hope you get the majority of your studies sorted before the arrival.

*tiny desks in lectures

Oh, Lyra, great news!

<side-steps in under extreme duress from Prambo>

Hello ladies, can I join you all?

Argh! *...shoulder the cost.

MAYBEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! <links arms and marches around playground chanting shit>

PiratesMam Tue 13-Aug-13 18:00:44

Hello Maybe when are you due? Congratulations! Hopefully Pram will also force you to join the FB group grin

Lyra I'm now worrying because I've not retched all day. Been a bit tired but I'm always tired. Hopefully I'll do my normal 7pm retch which will put my mind at rest!

Hello Pirate!! I'm due the 23rd. Facebook group? Hell yes! Where? When?!

JK10 Tue 13-Aug-13 18:07:35

I think your own birth pools aren't allowed in hosp, prob some health and safety thing and filling up of it may be a prob too. My local hosp had 2 pools in mlU and 1 on clu, but they say it is very rare that u don't get to use it, I was desperate for a water birth last time and had explained to the MW on duty how once my waters break and I eventually get to 4cm that things move real quick, so please have it filled ready for me! But she didn't! And because I kinda use my own techniques to cope the the pain, so from the outside I look totally calm she had no clue I was pushing and left us on out own! Which Is why I'm determined to have a waterbirth at home this time so I can sort it all out and not have to rely on anyone else!!!

Maybe don't read if worried of inductions and internals although others I know haven't had it for 5 days so think I was kinda unlucky!....
As for internal exams, I think the worsed for me was the gels they use for being induced and the sweeps they do at the same time, I had 5 days of it with DS3 as was getting very strong contractions but not dilating and due to it being 3rd baby they couldn't use the drip, on day 5 I actually started crying as I was so fed up with being stuck on a wars, no sleep, seeing other ppl coning and having babies and id still be there and being pushed and pulled about along with the contractions! so a very butch MW said u can't have this anymore I'm gonna stretch u myself to 2-3cm so I can break your waters! Wow! Nearly threw up but she did it bless her and ds was eventually born that nite! Last pg I was a week overdue and went for acupuncture just to avoid being induced!

Desperate to get the much wanted water birth! I also swear by tens machines which obv u can't use in te water!!!

Welcome to the new guys and Lyra I'm pleased u feel sick again sorry to hear of the rubbish time u getting, and pram with medication mess up and mummy good news bout date being bought forward!

PiratesMam Tue 13-Aug-13 18:08:57

greymoose can add you if you PM her with your FB details because she's the FB boss grin Am loving the FB group as can be a bit more open without the risk of outing self, am always worried about that on here!

apprenticemamma Tue 13-Aug-13 18:09:43

Thanks pram and others for your advice. Yes I think prob was being unreasonable expecting dh to come to scan and postpone his holiday. ...guess pregnancy brings out prima Donna tendencies but also insecurities. And I guess screeching 'don't bother coming to the birth' was also unreasonable response! Eek. I swear I'm not normally so unhinged ..

Thanks Pirate <scuttles off to check that all photos are suitable for ladies of this caliber>

Thanks for the welcome JK. Hope you get your water birth.

Apprentice I think a little bit of unhinged it totally acceptable wink

apprenticemamma Tue 13-Aug-13 18:17:04

Thanks pram and others for your advice. Yes I think prob was being unreasonable expecting dh to come to scan and postpone his holiday. ...guess pregnancy brings out prima Donna tendencies but also insecurities. And I guess screeching 'don't bother coming to the birth' was also unreasonable response! Eek. I swear I'm not normally so unhinged ..

apprenticemamma Tue 13-Aug-13 18:19:54

Thanks no maybe ! I'll tell dh that the march 2014 bus permits unhingedness. Course he will have no idea what I'm on about....

SoSurprised Tue 13-Aug-13 18:23:00

Hi everyone. So many scans coming up!! Good luck to everyone.
I am feeling very exhausted and have no energy. 3 more days till the weekend smile

greymoose Tue 13-Aug-13 18:50:10

jk i'm desperate for it too, i'd be heartbroken if i couldn't use the birthing pool even just for when i was in labour!

nomaybe just messaged you back - anyone else to be added to Facebook send me a message with your link and i'll add you!

Confitdecanard Tue 13-Aug-13 18:54:17

Hi all, I haven't posted for ages and ages. I have been dropping in for a nose every now and then but struggling to keep up! Just read through this thread and reassured to see others are feeling rough and bed-bound. I am not bring sick very often but have constant nausea and feel really dizzy and faint all the time. Luckily I teach so I'm on holiday, otherwise I think I'd have to be off. Scan is on Thursday (EDD 1st March) so fingers crossed for a heartbeat. I'm another one worrying about water births. I had one last time and can't imagine being able to do it on dry land. Not sure about a homebirth though as DS didn't breathe straight away and I think I want the reassurance of hospital just in case. Also when I mentioned a homebirth to DH he looked horrified. Good luck to all with upcoming scans. Lyra my symptoms came and went until about 10 weeks when they hit hard and now I wish I hadn't worried so much each time they disappeared!

Beccadugs Tue 13-Aug-13 19:03:51

Sorry ladies, TMI alert:

After weeks of being very soft in the number 2 department I now am in agony. I haven't been for 5 days, and my body is desperate to go, but nothing is appearing... I'm terrified of piles... Help...

brightonbeachbaby14 Tue 13-Aug-13 19:07:31

Hi everyone, just had my early scan, it was brilliant to see the little beans heart beat! They put me at 8w+5, whereas doc would put me a week later. Think ill tell my daily this weekend, although its very early I don't get to see them often and don't know when I will be visiting again.

My 12 week scan is 4th sept... Can't wait for that one now smile

I'm also interested in a water birth but not really started researching to be honest x

brightonbeachbaby14 Tue 13-Aug-13 19:09:10

Damn autocorrect! Family- not daily!

Hurrah for butch midwives! Boo to piles sad

emza78 Tue 13-Aug-13 19:27:18

Ah thanks MTB yes was today, had parents down helping with Dd whilst I generally lazed around and went out for lunch.

I'm bricking it that my tiredness seems to be easing off now too, that was my only symptom! Why can't I just feel sick and know everything is ok?! 9 weeks tomorrow, still a long old slog to 6th September but I shan't give in and pay for private!

Had a bit of a stitch like pain high up above belly button left hand side for last 24 hours, I remember the feeling from last time, thinking (hoping) its stretching pain which means everything is a-ok

IceNoSlice Tue 13-Aug-13 19:38:59

Frank I agree - it'll be good practise for life juggling baby, work etc! I hope you get as much in before march as you can though, one less thing for after.

Lyra good luck for tomorrow.

Pram hurray for teacher midwife. Gets me goat when I think docs are avoiding appropriate treatment for cost purposes. Seems so wrong. I know they need to save money but there must be better ways. There is so much wastage in other ways. For example I was prescribed paracetamol when I left hospital with DS. You can buy it for 16p FGS! How much did prescribing it cost? (doc time, pharmacist time, admin staff filling in forms, delay in letting me leave hence tying up a bed...) They should have just advised it. Moan over.

IceNoSlice Tue 13-Aug-13 19:39:54

Happy birthday emza. Time will fly to that scan, I'm sure. You can do it!

Sarahb8990 Tue 13-Aug-13 20:04:43

Thread 4 already!!
I'm feelin a lot better now and been able to keep everythin down today. Iv even been able to have chocolate which I haven't been able to have for the last month!! So glad iv got these anti sickness tablets, that are a god send!

Re water births- I really want one this time but jot holding any hope as I couldn't last time as I had group b strep so had to have antibiotics during labour.

commsgirl Tue 13-Aug-13 20:10:14

I'm trying to be relaxed about the whole birth thing but I do think I'll be gutted if I can't at least try the pool.

Beccadugs Tue 13-Aug-13 20:17:25

Sorry about my earlier post blush

Anyone taking anti-sickness be aware of the side effects...

PiratesMam Tue 13-Aug-13 20:29:05

Becca don't worry! I have had this with each pregnancy on and off. Check with your mw but I think there is something you can take. Drink lots of water and lots of fruit and veg. Are you taking iron supplements? Because that can make it really bad!!

PainAuxRaisins Tue 13-Aug-13 20:35:30

Hello - I joined the stats list (EDD March 28th) but can't keep up with you all and have only just finished getting through the first 3 threads! Thumbs up to the waterbirth idea! Also having some awful flashbacks of butch/no-nonsense midwife from last pg who performed a very thorough stretch and sweep when I was 42wks+ shock.

PainAuxRaisins Tue 13-Aug-13 20:37:33

Becca have you tried freshly squeezed OJ?? Works a treat (especially later on if your Dr/midwife puts you on Iron supplements)

Oh Becca sounds nasty. There's always the infamous prune juice....

Glad you're feeling better Sarah

Happy birthday Emza!

ChocChaffinch Tue 13-Aug-13 20:44:04

lovely doctor today gave me cyclizine. still puking though. 9 times today. Im not quite dehydrated yet though...

am literally fantasizing about the food I love and miss (sniff)
as soon as I can I'm going to drink
Tropicana orange juise! with bits!
Frijj chocolate milk!
eat Pizza! lasagne! steak! steak pies!

bleurgh why am I thinking of food when all of the area behind my lungs is poised to puke

6+5

Coolhand Tue 13-Aug-13 20:58:19

Welcome Painauxraisins.

Poor you choc - that's miserable - hoping the sickness lifts soon.

I am exhausted today and feeling really sick (though I am one of the lucky ones who doesn't vom). DH has been away for the last few days at the cricket which hasn't helped but he's thankfully back tonight. Last time, I felt like a new person about 12 weeks but this time can't actually believe that's going to happen as feel so awful right now!

Coolhand Tue 13-Aug-13 21:00:43

Also my determined plans to eat healthily this pregnancy are falling to pieces. The more rubbish I feel, the more choc biscuits and ice cream I eat to compensate blush

MTBMummy Tue 13-Aug-13 21:00:56

Hi becca, no need for apologies, I have the same problem and have had since about 3 weeks...

My GP recommended fibrogel, it's like someone has poured orange juice over all bran and left it to turn to mush, but it does seem to help a little without sending you to the other end if the scale.

MTBMummy Tue 13-Aug-13 21:01:36

Ps welcome to newbies - sorry for being so rude blush

JK10 Tue 13-Aug-13 21:07:44

pain welcome to thread! But at least butch no nonsense midwifes get the job done! Even though They make tour eye water! Instead of the softly, airy fairy approach!! Lol!!

becca really feel for u, hope u find something that works!

Happy Birthday, Emza! thanks

I've really got my calorie intake under control this week: no more takeaways; no more energy drinks; one bar of chocolate a day.

I'm sure this will last hmm

PiratesMam Tue 13-Aug-13 21:20:43

Oh choc that's rotten. Poor you. However hopefully the meds will kick in soon - that's the one I was given last time and although it didn't stop me feeling sick, it did stop the puking. Fingers crossed it works for you.

firsttimekat Tue 13-Aug-13 21:20:45

Hi newbies

Got my appointment for my midwife appointment, it's says to leave an hour and half.... Is it really going to take that long??? It's also for 8.30 am on a Saturday, don't they realise I need to sleep at the weekend and that I could have had some time off work!

Feeling so tired today, could easily have napped at work!

PiratesMam Tue 13-Aug-13 21:23:27

8.30 on a Saturday is mean!!

I keep forgetting to put my weeks at the end of my posts. I wish you could edit posts on MN.

10+3 (a quarter of the way through already!)

Teddybear4 Tue 13-Aug-13 21:41:47

Really thread 4?!

Feeling altogether normal here most of the day. Even managed a trip to the shops to buy some holiday sun dresses. Just hope they still fit next week...! While I am obviously pleased not to feel like death warmed up, I hope it isn't a sign of something ominous...

Becca - Second the fibrogel recommendation. I suffer really badly in that department. Also, for the (potential) piles try and avoid tight, non-cotton knickers. Yes, M&S big knicks are the order of the day here (already, weep).

I feel sorry that some of you are suffering so badly sad

11 weeks today! smile

ChocChaffinch Tue 13-Aug-13 22:08:18

I need some bigger pants

Teddybear4 Tue 13-Aug-13 22:11:11

Do it Choc. You'll feel like a new woman...

BionicEar Tue 13-Aug-13 22:22:16

Hello!

Haven't checked in for ages as been feeling so rough and exhausted.

Have constant nausea, but without the throwing up. Every time I eat, it soothes for about 1 second and then wham back to feeling hideously nausea. Nothing seems to help settle it at all. Have gone off loads of food, and nothing that has worked in previous pregnancies has worked this time round. Wails! Am hoping it will wear off soon.

The toddler has noticed that I am constantly eating (in bid to ward off the nausea) as said to DH "Mummy eating lots!" grin

DH nearly gave it away to DD this morning, as she tried to grab me and give me a big bear hug before I left to work, as he went "Mind Mummy's tummy" to which she looked very suspicious and went "Why? Are you pregnant?" to which I hastily scoffed and went "NO! Don't be daft, just got a sore tummy" whilst apologising to baby in tummy in my head that I was lying to his/her big sister!

Am burping constantly and my goodness am salivating loads! Don't recall burping and excess saliva in my previous pregnancies.

One of my friends has clocked that I am pregnant, as was a bit difficult to hide, as we went camping with them last week, where I spent much of time sleeping due to sheer exhaustion, and then looking like death warmed up due to feeling nausea constantly.

On the positive side I have a date for my dating scan - 28th August. Looking forward to seeing the little one wriggling around.

BionicEar Tue 13-Aug-13 22:25:53

Forgot to say I decided to invest in some lovely maternity bras from M&S as all my others were becoming too tight and uncomfortable.

They are bliss to wear I tell you! smile Just need to try and stay in my clothes for longer... though undoing top button more frequently now on my trousers!

Choc - go for the pants! You'll feel bliss I'll tell you! wink

PiratesMam Tue 13-Aug-13 22:34:35

I have lent out all my maternity clothes - can't wait to ask for them all back in a few weeks! Still have the M&S bras though, they are great although still a bit too big. So weird having boobs again.

bionic we have the same scan date. Mines at midday - am gonna take a sandwich with me!

Beccadugs Tue 13-Aug-13 22:53:31

Thanks everyone! It was very very traumatic!

Having difficulty keepin fluids or anything but carbs down which probably hasn't helped. Going to go to GP tomorrow and ask for some of that lovely sounding fibrogel! And have eaten half a pack of dried apricots!

Welcome to the newbies!

Exciting about scans coming up too, two weeks to go for me today!

11+0

greymoose Tue 13-Aug-13 23:01:50

Becca, not sure if anyones said but you can get it from supermarkets etc if its a pain to go to the doctors (It's not worth the bother with trying to get an appointment with my gp!) and don't mind paying smile

Beccadugs Tue 13-Aug-13 23:18:40

Even better news greymoose, thank you!

Argh! Ignore that, it was meant for some preggo friends over on the IVF thread! blush

faithfulandtruthful Wed 14-Aug-13 06:43:20

Morning ladies,

After a week of having mystery meals from the freezer I decided to take matters to hand and do an internet shop. It arrived yesterday, which was fab but there are always a few suprises... 5 marrow sized courgettes (not quite the size I had in my head when I ordered them!), double the amount to fresh ginger (anyone would think I'm suffering extream morning sickness- sadly I'm not * passes out the ginger tea) and 5 of the most ginormous onions you've ever seen, I usually get mixed sizes. So we have some super sized veg this week.

I know that you all feel that Emma (of The diary fame) is a smug cow etc. But I dont seem to have a copy, as a first timer I feel I've missed out. Have I overlooked it in the back of something else or did I never receive my copy? I threw quite a few things out of my bounty pack never to be seen again.

F&T 10weeks

MummyPig24 Wed 14-Aug-13 06:46:45

Morning. Sleeeeepy! I literally cannot move today! We had a Chinese takeaway last night that was so good. But I've got my eye on a mango this morning, I've been craving one and bought it yesterday. The kids are going to have to wrestle me for it!

Going to messy play at the children's centre, no idea what this is but it will pass the time! And then my neighbours are coming over, they are twins and absolutely insane so it's hard work seeing them and I know I will feel sick and be exhausted.

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 06:55:59

Ha ha F&t, opposite problem to my paltry 'one little carrot to last all week' issue! If you google Emma's diary I think the booklet is all on their website, alternatively there may be an option to ask for one to be sent to you.

Sleeeeepy today. And a lot to do at work. Roll on tomorrow and my dating scan, eek!

Mummypig messy play at the children's centre sounds fun! And no clearing up to do at home, winner.

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 07:32:10

Mango yummy ive been eating alot of strawberries... Had marmite and phillidelphia on toast this morn day off at last phew!

Good luck with your scan tomorrow eee i hope its wriggling and waving at you like ours was smile

SoSurprised Wed 14-Aug-13 07:38:57

We had takeaway too last night but it left me feeling very sick. Just ate a few mouthfuls.

SoSurprised Wed 14-Aug-13 07:40:18

Oh how exciting Ice! Are you the first one from the thread?

Exciting times Ice!

F&T I didn't given a copy of Emma's diary either. But there is a great iPad app for it!

I hate the commute. Everyone smells wink

Maybe, 8+3

Rockchick1984 Wed 14-Aug-13 08:07:23

Mummy messy play is fab! Make sure your DC is in their scruffs though - our surestart messy play sessions involve cornflour and water goo, cold tinned spaghetti, paint, sand, water etc etc and you don't want to get stuff like that all over any nice clothes!!

Good luck for tomorrow Ice

I'm really craving melon, but got to wait in for a stupid workman so no chance of any until this afternoon at the earliest sad

TMI ladies, but for the last 3 nights I've woken up in the early hours with a really upset tummy, yet I'm fine during the day! Is this normal or should I speak to the midwife?

HotCrossPun Wed 14-Aug-13 08:20:49

Emmas diary is a load of balls. It irked me how much it went on about 'feeling sexy' and 'staying sexy.'

I'm really not arsed about feeling sexy Emma, I'm just trying to get through the day without puking. angry

emza78 Wed 14-Aug-13 08:33:01

Week 9 and feeling fine, literally feel great today, loads of energy, then immediately feel guilty incase "something's happened" , grr it's messing with my head!

I say week 9 but actually 9 weeks today marks beginning of 10th week, I always like to try and trick myself into thinking I'm a bit further along!

Have a great day y'all!

faithfulandtruthful Wed 14-Aug-13 08:59:55

* hands Ice a marrow courgette and a giant oinion for the store cupboard.

NoMaybe I'm droid so will look it up on play store later.

Hot I feel l'm missing out on some serious eye rolling, deep siging, bemoaning the lack of realiy and not forgetting the mocking. Its like a trian wreck, you know its bad but you've gotta take a look! Ps. What do you mean you dont feel sexy, surely the fatigue, nausea and bloating adds to the sexiness!

F&T

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 09:00:25

Im 11 wks today and ive put on 5lbs since 8 weeks is that bad i feel so fat i eat non stop literally im already worried about loosing the weight after cos i know so many slim jims who are now fat after having children sad im going to start pregnancy yoga i think and start swimming/running asap post birth .....

MTBMummy Wed 14-Aug-13 09:05:08

Morning all

Good luck for tomorrow Ice

I woke at 3 feeling very very ill, but it seems to have let off a bit now, that was until my colleague sat down next to me with a large bowl of baked beans and sausages - I could have thrown up in his bowl now he's coughing and sneezing next to me - WIBU to kill him?

I didn't get a copy of Emma's Diary either, I was kind of looking forward to seeing what rubbish it sprouted. Although I do have a book from MiL on how to be a good wife which was published in the 1950's it's laughable, one bit of advice that sticks with me is "Remember to have your hair set before you go into labour, and take your makeup with you, so that you look your best when your husband sees you"

rosyryan Wed 14-Aug-13 09:12:37

Hope you are getting on well Lyra.

I'm feeling disturbingly fine this morning as well. 8+2 so a bit soon, but I'll probably be sick again by lunchtime.

Arghh! Just spoke to my midwife, she said I should have had a scan date through by now so she's gone off the chase up the hospital. Sounds like they've misplaced the paperwork, but midwife says she has got a copy of the fax sent to them after my booking in appointment.

Wuxiapian Wed 14-Aug-13 09:19:13

Marking my place.

My EDD has moved to 28/02/14, but, DS2 was 15 days late, so I reckon there's a chance this one will be late, too.

I'm 11.4 and still no scan date!

Rockchick1984 Wed 14-Aug-13 09:19:59

MTB that's ace, I want a copy!!

Gaw no matter how much weight you gain, you will lose it if you want to badly enough. Pre DS I was always slim, 5'7" and around 9.5 stone. Gained 5 stone having him, but once he was here I wasn't anywhere near as bothered about my weight as I had been before. Still lost most of it without really trying, so if I'd stuck with any diet or exercise it would have all come off. Don't worry about doing it too soon though, I lost a stone just by giving birth, then another stone in 4 weeks which I put down to breastfeeding and lochia!! Aiming to gain no more than 2 stone this time if I can, so that I can hopefully get back to pre baby weight without trying grin

Wuxiapian Wed 14-Aug-13 09:21:48

I feel your pain gaw. I'm 7lbs heavier already - ontop of extra 1.5 stone extra weight left on from DS2, 6 months old.

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 09:31:05

Really wuxia i got my scan date when i was just over 9 weeks, have you phoned and asked my mw gavee a number to ring if i hadnt recieved it by 11 weeks.

Lol rock i hope i loose it that quick when i got bfp i was so convinced i was gonna eat soo healthy but no all ive been eating is noodles/fizzy strawberry laces cheese and all kimds of bad food sad i did have some strawberries.... I will be buying a belly bandit too!! grin

Frigging hell! 5 stones! How does that happen? shock

Thinking of you this morning, Lyra.

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 09:36:37

Also looking at stretch mark avoidants!! Think im gonna purchase burts bees tummy butter so many to choose from :/

MTBMummy Wed 14-Aug-13 09:39:52

I gained 3 stone with DD (although I was grossly underweight) I managed to lose 2 stones after having her and was at a much healthier BMI when I fell pregnant. I'm hoping I'll gain only 2 stones this time round and shed them quite easily - I know the choc chip cookies at the weekly mums meet ups and all the coffee shop mornings did not help my weight loss after DD, so I don't plan on doing that again.

HotCrossPun Wed 14-Aug-13 09:41:15

Faithful Every second word is sexy. How you will get a sexy cleavage. How sexy maternity underwear does exist and a sexy bra is a must confused

Aside from that there is a whole section dedicated to 'Feeling Sexy.'

I'm on week 11 and have learned that Emma had a lovely long soak in the bath tonight with a strawberry soda bath bomb which was 'totally lush' grin

MortifiedAdams Wed 14-Aug-13 09:42:03

If anyone wants any Bio Oil, Primark have atarted stocking it!

Wuxiapian Wed 14-Aug-13 09:45:26

I left mw a voicemail yesterday and sent her a txt message this morning.

Not sure what to do if I don't get a response today.

rosyryan Wed 14-Aug-13 09:46:14

I gained 9lbs with my last pregnancy and got stretchmarks from head to toe! No rhyme nor reason to it.

Hottie, that Emma sounds like an utter twat. What patronising nonsense. I'll bet you any money Emma's husband is shagging her best mate.

Edamame Wed 14-Aug-13 09:51:58

My pregnancy symptoms went away for a week but now I'm feeling sick again. I had no idea that they could come and go like that until seeking the wisdom of MN. So I am feeling better in one respect. And extremely lucky to be working from home at the moment.

Now I'm worried because:
- relationship is suffering due to hideous and never-ending grumpy mood
- I am or will be depressed since ditching the medication (I tapered and it was planned but still feel totally crap)
- I will turn into my mother

I really didn't want to tell RL friends about being pg yet but might have to because I think I need some support.

Thanks Rosy and Pram. I decided not to go, given that I had some nausea yesterday and also would have had to drag my reluctant boys along to sit in the waiting room for god knows how long till I would be seen.

Instead we're meeting up with a friend and her children soon for a play and picnic lunch in the park.

Only one more week till my 12-week scan. I'm trying to be patient smile

SoSurprised Wed 14-Aug-13 10:02:27

Mortified I hadn't even thought of the stretch marks yet! Just barely getting better with the nausea.

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 10:06:27

I made a facebook acc for the group how do i go about joining it

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 10:10:12

I thought I'd escaped stretch marks with DS. I was diligently applying the bio oil, feeling pretty smug, then at week 38... BAM! All over my tummy. Grim. Mostly faded now though.

I'm not convinced the creams/oils work really. No more than a decent body lotion would, anyway. But I'll probably use them again just in case they do help! Cusson's mum and bump range are quite nice.

greymoose Wed 14-Aug-13 10:11:42

mtb is it bad that i plan on being perfectly tanned etc at all times when labor is imminent (I'm sure it will remain just a plan)

gawjus I'm using bio oil but apparently its genetic anyway in which case i am fucked either way! also to join the fb just pm me the link to your page and i'll get you added!

edamame hope you start to feel better soon, i think those are natural worries especially with all the hormones flying around!!

Writerwannabe83 Wed 14-Aug-13 10:12:13

Hello everyone smile

Currently expecting my first baby, due 29th March smile

My dating scan isn't until 16th September but me and hubby are treating ourselves to a reassurance scan which we have this afternoon. So excited!!

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 10:16:07

How do I pm you blush when I click your name nothin happens

Writerwannabe83 Wed 14-Aug-13 10:22:18

I don't know who you trying to PM but whomever it is, you don't click on their name you click on the 'message poster' option which is to the right of their name (on the same blue strip) smile

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 10:30:13

I dont have that either maybe cos im on my phone

greymoose Wed 14-Aug-13 10:32:38

are you on the app gawjus?

if so in the menu bar at the bottom click more, then pm's - i'll send you my link hopefully you can click on that and add me that way!

if you cant click the link and you need to send yours instead, theres a little box with an arrow next to each post, click that and send private message! xx

HotCrossPun Wed 14-Aug-13 10:34:03

I've PM'd you gawjus it might be easier for you to respond to that with your FB link, then ill PM grey for you.

HotCrossPun Wed 14-Aug-13 10:34:56

Ignore me - X posted with grey grin

greymoose Wed 14-Aug-13 11:16:14

thanks hot cross! gawjus you're all added now let me know if it's not working etc!

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 11:30:48

Im on there just waiting on email to verify my account so i cant post yet!

im so scared about telling my parents dad especially i really think he will hit the roof aggghhh why oh why cant i have supportive parents!

greymoose Wed 14-Aug-13 11:47:20

gawjus they might surprise you, I thought my mum was going to go ballistic but she came around, you're still their daughter they're going to love you no matter what! Why do you think they won't be supportive?

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 12:00:02

My mum has bipolar and manic depression so she could absolutely flip shit or he over the moon ad my nan/dad are so traditional marriage career first (they dont like my oh either) my dad found out i had a boyfriend at 17 and he tried keeping me indoors every second of every day he is so so over protective i was brought up by my dad

greymoose Wed 14-Aug-13 12:19:43

gawjus that could be tough but ultimately I'm sure it'll work out it, might just be a case of everyone getting used to it, it'll probably be a lot of shock! with your dad you're always going to be his baby, i know a lot of people whose dads have gone a bit cray when they've found out but gone on to be brilliant grandfathers !

MummyPig24 Wed 14-Aug-13 12:21:36

Messy play was good. They had jelly, kids loved that and obviously ate some. There was cold spaghetti, goo, veg in paint, sand and water. They didn't get too filthy, just rather sandy and sticky. Then I had to go and buy a frijj milkshake. This is why I'm fat.

I gained weight after having ds, having barely gained anything in pregnancy. I gained a stone when I was expecting dd and lost it after, but I'm still 3 stone heavier than when I had ds. Not good. But I just can't motivate myself to lose weight, I feel happy as I am, although I know I'm not at a healthy weight.

Nice one, Lyra, stay cool, yeah?

commsgirl Wed 14-Aug-13 12:23:33

It sounds like a tough situation gawjus but like grey said, they might surprise you! Even if you don't get the reaction you'd hope for, they've got plenty of time for the news to settle in and I'm sure by the time your baby is here they'll be excited to meet him/her.

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 12:28:37

Lets hope so !! Like you both said after the initial shock im sure things will settle down. All of oh family know they are so excited none of mine do! Waiting till scan to avoid any uneseccary corruption haha smile

faithfulandtruthful Wed 14-Aug-13 12:28:55

Hot I snorted when I read about the sexy bra, Emma clearly lives on an alternative planet, perhaps Emma would like to explain where she has been finding all this sexy underwear. Its not subliminal advertising for a certain smelly high street company is it? The bath bomb was what?

F&T

I make my own bath bombs by trumping vociferously just before getting out.

faithfulandtruthful Wed 14-Aug-13 12:37:36

Gawjus sometimes the anticipation of what might happen is worse than what happens in the end. Keep strong I'm sure it'll work out on the end.

F&T

I'm bored stiff today. Can anyone suggest a way of filling time for an out-of-work pregnant bird? You may wish to take the following into account:

1) I don't like getting up before 10am
2) I don't like standing up
3) I don't like people
4) I don't like other people's kids
5) I hate small talk
6) I'm not creative
7) I have no patience
8) I am easily bored

Fanks, in advance smile

SoSurprised Wed 14-Aug-13 12:42:09

Congratulations Writerwannabe83 smile you must be so excited! My partner missed out on the first scan. We are eagerly awaiting the next scan whenever that may be.

MummyPig24 Wed 14-Aug-13 12:48:43

Pram you could take up knitting?!

MummyPig24 Wed 14-Aug-13 12:50:32

Hmm but that might not work with the "not creative" criteria. Watching tv is the only thing left I guess.

FoxMulder Wed 14-Aug-13 12:52:37

Thanks for the advice on work RockChick that is a very good point about making sure I'm getting full pay in the quaifying weeks.

Are many of you finding yourselves totally incapacitated by this nausea/exhaustion or am I a giant pansy? I'm considering the day a success if I can walk to the end of the road and back. I've actually lost weight because eating is such a hideous experience at the moment (and I was only just clinging on to the the 'normal weight' range in the first place). Got a MW appt tomorrow for her to take some blood, maybe it'll turn out I'm anaemic or something that can be fixed.

So, as for this FB group. I take it all your friends can't see you're a member?!

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 12:53:16

Lmao at your home made bath bombs pram !

faithfulandtruthful Wed 14-Aug-13 12:59:08

Pram maybe you could write the antidote to Emma's diary. A more realistic take on how you will feel whist preggers!

MTBMummy Wed 14-Aug-13 13:09:47

Fox It's a completely private group - so only members can see what you're posting

Faithful, yes! What a splendid idea. Summat like this:

'Pregnant ladies, always tie your hair back before vomiting down the toilet. You owe it to your husband to not have carrot-encrusted locks at bed time. How will you ever keep his attention looking like a filthy tramp?'

'Ladies, if you're struggling to feel sensual during the first trimester, try running a cumberland sausage over your breasts to tantalise the nipples and awaken those loins! You should be dripping wet by the time your husband comes home from work' [Disclaimer: sausages are for external use only].

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 13:21:52

Pram - swimming?

Ice, I love swimming but there isn't a pool for miles and I don't have a car. This is not an excuse..I live in a pretty remote place.

...thank you for the suggestions, though.

Fox I'm massively struggling. The London commute just adds to it. For the nausea, I've found sea bands really help. And vegetables. I cannot get enough of them!!

Pramella, I love knitting. Try it. And baking!! Fatten everyone up. <notes seductive sausage trick for future use>

That's exciting Writer! I had an early scan yesterday (due to IVF) and also have one booked for the 29th. It really is amazing!!

Are there 12 week scans today? <out of loop>

Writerwannabe83 Wed 14-Aug-13 13:44:13

I have just got back from my scan and it was amazing!! Such a tiny little Bean but a really clear and strong heartbeat grin

The sonographer also spotted a cyst on both my left and right ovary but said they are probably due to hormonal changes and will most likely reabsorb.

Eek - me and hubby feel even more excited now!!!

Congrats Writer!!!!

PiratesMam Wed 14-Aug-13 14:01:31

I think Ice is next for 12 week scan isn't she - tomorrow?

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 14:14:44

Yep, tomorrow. And Coolhand and someone else... Sorry, can't remember who- there are so many of us!

MTBMummy Wed 14-Aug-13 14:16:13

Maybe - I'm with you on that front! I commute 2 hours each way into London every day, and I'm already loosing the will to live - even with my bump on board badge

Why...

Does no one offer up a seat if you have your badge
Do people look offended if you ask for their seat
Do people have no concept of personal space
and why oh why oh WHY does everyone seem to stink???

Sorry commuter rant over - as you were

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 14:19:15

Maybe and MTBmummy - throw up on their shoes if they refuse to give up their seat?

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 14:19:28

Congrats writer how far long are you gd luck tomorrow scan ladies xxxx

Writerwannabe83 Wed 14-Aug-13 14:22:44

I'm 7+3 smile

Me and hubby were far too impatient to wait for the standard 12 week scan grin

PiratesMam Wed 14-Aug-13 14:24:57

MTBMummy I remember when I used to commute in central London when preg with number 1 - it was often the most surprising people who would offer me a seat. Teenage boys etc! More often than not though it was women.

HotCrossPun Wed 14-Aug-13 14:35:48

Just on the topic of giving up seats for people. I was coming home from work the other day and 3 really old ladies got on the train. There was a seat for 2 of them but not the other. Quick as a flash the man who was sitting in the 3rd seat got up so the woman could sit down.

He was gorgeous . About 6'2, big broad shoulders, tanned with salt and pepper hair. The old ladies were swooning over him for the rest of the journey! They kept on giggling and whispering & looking over at him, the poor thing was mortified at all the attention.

I can't wait till I'm old or really pregnant and gorgeous men give up their seats for me grin

MTB I'm so with you. The other week in the heat it was awful. On a packed train a nice man was trying to make eyes at people to make them give up a seat, but it didn't work. People are twats. Where so you live? My commutes not too different to yours. It sucks.

I like that idea Ice!!

Oh Hot! I need one of those in my life!!

mimili Wed 14-Aug-13 14:55:37

Love hearing about the successful scans grin Congrats!

I have been told today that my scan is unlikely to be any sooner than week 14 angry

Would you a) wait a week and chase again b) kick off now c) just wait or d) say to hell with the nhs, get grumpy and pay for a private scan.

As a bit of background had bleeding at week 6, had an epu scan and therefore have already seen beans heartbeat.

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 14:58:28

Ahh lovely its amazing isnt it writer i had a scan at 9+2 and saw it wriggling its little arms, soon as we left i burst in to tears best day of my life so far!! So happy for you eee :D

rosyryan Wed 14-Aug-13 15:19:25

Mimili I would be going with option B. If you want to have the nuchal testing then 14 weeks is too late angry

14+1 is the limit for nuchal testing but I would still kick off.

I couldn't possibly knit with two cats. I'm going to get my bike fixed so I can get to a swimming pool.

Ice, is your dating scan prior to twelve weeks then?

Do people really wear 'baby on board' badges? Do they work? I don't think i would give my seat up unless a woman had a noticeable bump. But then I'm evil.

I'm still waiting for my midwife to call me back and let me know what's going on with my scan! The only number I haven't call her on is the bloomin answer phone so if I call that it won't be picked up till tomorrow. Grrrr angry

They do Pram, I'm the proud owner of one. They don't really work. I don't just wear mine for a seat though. It's more the fact that people don't crush me, and that if I pass out or throw up, people will understand why. And it's pretty horrific being stuck in a 40 degree tube when you feel rubbish. Rant over. I love the commute, can't you tell wink

HotCrossPun Wed 14-Aug-13 15:50:49

Tubes are evil. I lived in London for a year and I found them unbearable.

Give me an dated train in Glasgow any day!

Fair enough, but I don't see people on sweaty trains wearing 'tumour on board' badges 'gallstones on board'. Where will it end?? wink

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 16:15:39

Scan will be at 12 weeks bob on, Pram, but I think my weird cycle has messed up the dating and I'm actually less than that. Great idea to get your bike sorted. Bloody love a good pedal, me. Though I am lucky in that I can avoid busy roads quite easily.

Re: bump on board. I admit I would be a bit suspicious if the wearer had no bump, like she was trying it on! But I'd give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe - aren't you worried you'll see someone you know whilst wearing it?

One the subject of commuting, when I was HEAVILY pregnant with DS1, a man actually raced me for the last seat on the tube. He won because he wasn't carrying a bloody watermelon in his pelvis. I looked daggers at him for the whole journey but he pretended not to notice. Arsehole.

Ugh. What a vile creature angry

x0gawjus0x Wed 14-Aug-13 16:31:23

Sorry for all of you struggling with scans and getting through to mw etc.. My 12 wk scan was confirmed at 9+2 and i actually just had a phonecall off mw asking to make an appointment for my 16 wk check up... Im only 11 weeks! So lucky to have such an efficient midwife smile

Ice, the only thing up with my rather excellent bike is this scratchy nut/screw just below the saddle which rips into all my cycle wear and makes my thigh bleed sad

Oh lyra what a knob. You should've sat on his lap.

No Ice I'm not really bothered who sees.

I'm not wearing it to get a seat. As I said, I've never been offered one. But feeling so ill, if I were to be ill on the train, people would know.

According to my GP, I should get my scan letter through this week sometime. I've never been so excited to get post wink

That sounds painful Prammy. Will you have a long cycle to your pool?

About three miles, Marbie all uphill sad

Could you learn to drive? It'll be very handy when you have your little one in tow.

I can drive and passed my test when I was twenty <indignant> We can't afford to run a car on one wage and wouldn't want to.

greymoose Wed 14-Aug-13 17:28:36

I like the bike idea pram! You can add a basket for the baby when they're here grin

On the subject of transport/driving, can anyone suddenly not drive or park properly? Recently I am so awful and am usually a really competent driver!

I don't know if its just because I got a new (bigger) car when I was pregnant, but I was always ok with massive 4x4s / saloon cars (company car at job in America hence the ridiculousness, not mine!) before so don't know why this one which isn't anywhere near as big as those is causing me such trouble!

What cars does everyone have with how many children? Anyone going to upsize for the baby/think theirs might be too small? Can't help but think I may have gone gung ho size wise for just one baby haha!

apprenticemamma Wed 14-Aug-13 17:30:51

I'm sure I felt that butterfly fluttery feeling of Puffin kicktoday grin . I'm eleven weeks but it's dc 2. IAnyone else?

Oh Pram that's a toughy!! But, downhill all the way home wink

I can't drive at all <shameful> I'm so used to walking everywhere.

Goose, we got a new car 2 weeks ago. We got an Audi A4 estate. We have a dog, so needed an estate to fit him and the pram (not you Prammy) in!

apprenticemamma Wed 14-Aug-13 17:38:59

grey we have a Honda civic . Looks sporty but spacious inside. We are going to stick with it for now..apart from anything else going to be pretty skint for a couple more years! Also have issues with parking already, all my accidents occur doing one mile an hour. These issues worsen with pregnancy and baby in car distractions...I would be a liability in a bigger car wink .pram we hired bikes with a toddler chariot attached for our ds this summer..v safe and a great way to get about. He loved it.

HotCrossPun Wed 14-Aug-13 17:40:17

I can't breathe through my nose at all. Its been like this all day.

Is it okay to have a Lemsip? It says on it to seek doctors advice during pregnancy.

Wuxiapian Wed 14-Aug-13 17:44:54

apprentice, I'm on DC3, but not feeling any flutterings yet.

NoMaybe, we have an Audi A6, one 15yr old, one 6 month old and two dogs (one being a giant breed). Will need a double buggy, so we may have to sell the Audi and get a lovely space wagon, if there's one designed big enough for my rabble.

I've never been offered a seat (when very pregnant) on public transport. People can be a big bunch of crap.

My mw still hasn't responded to my voice message and text. I am beginning to get pissed off.

In her defence, my midwife has been very good: it's the hospital that have lost my paperwork hmm

Teddybear4 Wed 14-Aug-13 17:50:29

H has something big and German with 7 seats that we use when we all head out together. Very sensible.

Less sensible is that I have a Fiat 500 for everyday that I bought in June (we had been trying for a year and I was convinced it wouldn't happen).... I love it but not sure it will be the most practical for three children. Currently researching very small buggies, how to switch off front airbags and hoping that DS and DD never ask to have a friend home for tea...

It's not at all economical for me to drive the big German thing on a daily basis as school is a fair trek and it drinks diesel so a permanent car swap is out (especially as H (at over 6ft) hates the 500...)

Magpieblue Wed 14-Aug-13 18:15:38

Hello everyone, new here. Didn't even know these clubs existed - how wonderful it is. What's the newbie etiquette? I'm due around 22nd March. First baby.

Feel like I've got off lightly so far compared to others - little bit queasy, but nothing much. Sore boobs. So tired I'm asleep by 8pm most nights though. Then all the symptoms stopped round about week 7 and I got panicked, but trying to keep calm. From what I've read it could be a bad sign, or totally normal. No scan date yet. Feel a bit more sick today than yesterday (and still so tired), so I'm taking that as a good sign - though that could be down to the amount of pickled onion Monster Munch I'm living off. Did anyone else's symptoms disappear?

apprenticemamma Wed 14-Aug-13 18:22:14

magpie welcome and congrats. My symptoms esp the nausea fluctuates and I have had a run of good days so like they'd disappeared. I think this is normal for a lot of us.... picked onion amything and crisps in general...yum! wuxiapian thanks for yer feedback. It was v brief but undeniably something of baby movement..could equally be wind or uterus stretching. The holy bible of Google suggests some women do as early as 11weeks so I'll keep an open mind .. .x

Wuxiapian Wed 14-Aug-13 18:58:19

Lol, teddy. Sod's law.

apprentice, wow, how exciting if it is baby flutters.

Congrats, magpie! My symptoms have been coming and going the past week or so (I'm 11.4 now), but before then , I felt pretty damned awful all the time.

Edamame Wed 14-Aug-13 19:09:55

magpie welcome
Snap here on dates - I'm also due #1 on 22nd March

My symptoms totally disappeared for 5 days about a week ago and now they're back.
Salt & Vinegar Chipsticks are my salty carb of choice right now.

Blimey, Edamame! S&V Chipsticks are doing it for me, too. I hated them before now.

Welcome, Magpie, and congratulations thanks

Frank, what a pain in the crack. I'll bet you feel all adrift but it will all be sorted soon and hopefully they'll panic at their shitness and chuck a date at you for next week. I have to wait until the 29th for my dating scan.

PiratesMam Wed 14-Aug-13 19:32:48

apprentice 2nd time I felt fluttering at 11 weeks, increasing into actual movements felt at 15/16 weeks. So could be! I've had nothing this time so far.

Awful day here. Beyond exhausted, kids being shitbags. A day when I've wondered why we're doing it again! Also I look hideous. Really need everyone IRL to know now so they can all be nice to me and pretend I don't look like Grotbags with a hangover.

10+4

apprenticemamma Wed 14-Aug-13 19:42:41

what is with the crisps? brannigans ham and pickle today for me bought by my oh ...refused to share with him haha. Preparing to watch Scotland England ...through my fingers

By rights I should be having one of the first dating scans as I'm due 4th March and now 11+1 <sulks like a teenager>

wink

ChocChaffinch Wed 14-Aug-13 19:56:09

puke puke puke.

cyclizine having no effect whatsoever. how long should I give it before going back to doc? is there anything stronger that they can prescribe??

hating this sad

Magpieblue Wed 14-Aug-13 19:57:09

Ah, what lovely welcomes - thank you.

S&V chipsticks also on my regulars list! Spicy tomato Snaps too (a rare delicacy not found in too many places), Wotsits and Worcestershire sauce French Fries. Plus Monster Munch of course (king of crisps). I'm definitely preferring the kind of dissolvable-style crisps, over the traditional potato ones. Not sure why - maybe I'm too lazy to chew. Mmm, crisps.

slightly embarrassed about whole post on crisps...goes off to open pack of Quavers anyway

Magpieblue Wed 14-Aug-13 20:01:39

and apologies to ChocChaffinch whose post I didn't see, and probably doesn't want to hear about my crisps addiction right now

Sorry to hear you're going through such a tough time

Frank, I'm a tad sulky too, 'cos I'm 11+1 and one of the Grown-Ups <pout>

ChocChaffinch Wed 14-Aug-13 20:28:59

tomato snaps are the best on that list

<bleurgh face>

Sarahb8990 Wed 14-Aug-13 20:46:31

Since comin out of hosp on Monday I have been able to eat almost anythin compared to nothin at all last week. But have to agree crisps are in the top! Especially tangy toms, can't get enough haha

Coolhand Wed 14-Aug-13 20:57:05

Crisps top here too.

Just got caught up. Edamame think you were saying yesterday you're struggling a little. Do tell RL friends if you feel you need their support.

I'm pretty sure there are 3 dating scans tmrw, Ice, me and Baldrick from memory. We're all tmrw afternoon. I am feeling nervous as haven't had any early scans. I have a really busy morning though - I'm Head of Sixth form in my school and tmrw is results day. I get to interview all those who have underperformed at AS, some of whom will have to repeat the year - it tends to be a morning with tears and stressed out parents (I don't get all the fun of the celebrations). Had to tell a few colleagues today as had to get someone to step in to take over interviews tmrw afternoon. Means there will not be a minute all morning which is good!

Coolhand Wed 14-Aug-13 20:58:13

Oh and welcome Magpies!

My Kenwood also arrived today, domestic goddess here I come.

commsgirl Wed 14-Aug-13 21:09:13

grey DP has been dragging me around car shops all afternoon looking for a 'family car' that can fit our entire house in so you're not the only one!

Welcome magpie!

I'm with you all on the crisps.

Oh, Coolhand, what an achievement to be a Head! smile

Wow Coolhand! Busy day tomorrow. I remember getting my A level results <wistful>

Choc I'd go back to the docs, see what they say.

I have gone off all crisps apart from S&V Pringles. Oh my.

Hello Magpie!

Good luck for tomorrow you three!! How exciting!

Coolhand, what colour did you go for in the end? Good luck tomorrow (plus everyone else having scans).

Welcome Magpie. This thread has been a godsend.

On the subject of cars, we have a Chrysler PT Cruiser, which looks cool (IMO), is really roomy inside and has a big boot, tall rather than deep. It should fit 5 of us if DS1 doesn't use his car seat. He's old enough to do without it now.

Crisps - last week I ate a 12-pack of Quavers in two days blush And yesterday I bought two big multipacks of Walkers S&V. Delish.

I could swear I'm feeling some flutterings too but could be wind or wishful thinking.

MummyPig24 Wed 14-Aug-13 21:30:54

We are going to need a bigger car. Dh has a skoda Octavia vrs and we can't really fit 3 car seats in, it's such a squeeze. But, it's worth peanuts and we can't afford a new car. So I'm not sure what we are going to do about that.

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 21:45:14

Coolhand ooooh exciting about the Kenwood! And just in time for the GBBO starting on Sunday. Though I'm more of a savoury person than cakes (and I hate cupcakes, all that gruesome buttercream, eugh) I do love my Kenwood! Hmm I feel some baking coming on...

IceNoSlice Wed 14-Aug-13 21:47:45

Sorry, got distracted by Coolhand and her mixer.

Hope you feel better soon Choc and welcome magpie.

Mmmm crisps. I have a sudden urge for some discos. Maybe the village shop has them. I'll check tomorrow!

PiratesMam Wed 14-Aug-13 21:57:31

<wakes up>

Best S+V crisps by miles are Squares

<goes back to sleep>

PiratesMam Wed 14-Aug-13 21:58:18

[goes back to sleep]

Beccadugs Wed 14-Aug-13 22:06:24

We too have been looking at a new "family" vehicle...
We currently have a C3, but the dog currently travels on the back seat, and there is no room for her and pram in the boot. She can get filthy on walks so I don't really want her continuing on the back seat with a baby.

We are think C4 grand Picasso or Volvo v50, just need to work out if we can afford to finance a bit or not!

Coolhand Wed 14-Aug-13 22:42:13

Thanks Pram but I'm just head of 6th form, not the entire school so not such a big deal but I'll greedily take your ego boost anyway and run with it

We have a humble Focus and an ancient Golf.

We could probably do with something bigger, more so to accommodate my humongous husband, who is 6ft 10, there's not much room for car seats in the back when he puts the seat fully back. Tried to put our current car seat behind him in a Focus in Spain and it didn't fit. DS currently travels on opposite side. Baby seat will probably be fine and we'll worry about the rest after that when we will def have no money left for new car

Marmitemoomoo Wed 14-Aug-13 23:42:06

Hello again, just taken me ages to catch up since first post only a few days ago! Will not leave it as long next time. Have gone from craving noodles to crisps and feeling sick all in the space of half an hour. Currently sitting up in bed listening to snoring DH trying to keep the light away from his face as not to wake him up from fear of being moaned at!
We have a mini as a family car, seemed a good idea at the time, mid life crisis of wanting to be a bit trendy, huge 15 year , ever growing lanky 13 year old and two dogs that travel in boxes, one in the boot, one on the middle seat is going to make interesting days out when the bump arrives.
But not going to worry about that for a while.
Too busy trying to get through the day without falling asleep or feeling sick. Still haven't told the children and the eldest keeps giving me odd looks when he sees me lying on the bed, with tummy ache from the 'bread' I have eaten. Why do you eat it then mum if it makes,you feel ill? He asks, he must think I've gone mad. If only he knew what was really going on poor thing :-(

Marmitemoomoo Wed 14-Aug-13 23:43:11

Silly question... How do you get the smiley faces etc to appear?

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 00:02:36

do [ followed by grin or smile then ] no spaces.

[ grin ] no spaces is grin

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 00:03:58

My random Q - why does one boob feel like it has pins and needles? And it goes under my armpit too.

When I had dd I felt it after the birth for a few weeks and was told it was Let Down - even though I didnt BF. Surely I cant be producing milk yet?!

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 00:18:54

oooh just thought - I wonder how many of us will discover multiples at our scans!

x0gawjus0x Thu 15-Aug-13 06:29:02

Is morning sickness more mental and causing it yourself? I am normally sick every morning yellow stuff yumyum then when i get to work i dont feel sick the entire day unless i smell poo or something then as soon as i finish i feel sick in the car and for the rest of the eve and it just repeats daily :/ maybe i just dont pay attention to it when im constantly busy?

x0gawjus0x Thu 15-Aug-13 07:06:04

frank im due 2nd march got my scan tues :D so nervous I think ill be too scared to go lol.

Hiya magpie my symptoms all went over night was really worried then 4 days later I was being sick again and waking through the night desperate for a weee!

As for cars not too worried we have a mazda 3 and a focus n this is our first so will have enpugh room luckily. Dont think ill have any more with the worry im already going through with this one!! Xx

SoSurprised Thu 15-Aug-13 07:25:59

Good luck ice with the scan

We are also thinking of about a different car as ours is so old and creaky I think it can drop dead at any second.

SoSurprised Thu 15-Aug-13 07:28:28

Just read the last page good luck to you too Baldrick and Coolhand.

Rockchick1984 Thu 15-Aug-13 07:37:03

Cool what about something like a Picasso with 3 proper seats in the back, then you don't need a car seat behind DH?

We have got rid of the car since moving house - DH doesn't drive and I try to walk most places. I'm 10 mins from train station, 30 seconds from bus stop, and prefer having the extra cash rather than the convenience of a car!

Good luck to the scan ladies today!! A week to go til mine, my dad is bringing DS along so they will both come in (as soon as we know everything is ok) then my mum is meeting us for tea after (parents are divorced but still get on ok).

Has anyone thought yet about booking a gender scan at 16/17 weeks?

Good luck for today's scans ladies.

My colleague has just bought a Picasso to ferry her grandchildren around in. It's very nice. We've got a Focus and a Rio, no intention of changing either car in the near future.

MummyPig24 Thu 15-Aug-13 08:02:47

Good luck to those having scans today!

Had a good day yesterday, but on the way to pick up our wedding album (which is bloody gorgeous) I read an email from my friend who has breast cancer. The cancer has spread to her lymphnodes under her arm, so she needs 12 rounds of chemo after her mastectomy. It's so, so cruel. She has 2 small children. I just can't bear the thought that they could be left without their mother. Feeling really sad today, I just hope I can support her and be there for her. I haven't told her about the baby yet. I'm not sure when would be a good time. I feel like I ought to tell her personally, rather than the generic email I was going to send round that friendship group.

littleABI Thu 15-Aug-13 08:11:00

Oooh exciting day ahead, thinking of you ladies with your scans today!! So nervous about mine, still got 3 weeks.

As for car, we have a lovely spacious Jazz but doesn't stop DH looking. I think for us, its a question of downsizing what we take with us (eg camping) and getting a trailer. Car will do us till (hopefully) the family expands even more... !

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 08:11:04

I'm so excited for all those of you going for scans today!!!

littleABI Thu 15-Aug-13 08:12:09

Awww mummy that is so sad. Thinking of you. X

I'm sorry to hear that Mummy

Good luck for all the scans!!

Rock we are going to have a gender scan at 17 weeks!

So sorry to hear your friend's news Mummy.

JustCallMeBaldrick Thu 15-Aug-13 08:46:45

Thanks for all the scan good wishes! I'm completely crapping myself that something's wrong - haven't felt this way this strongly before any other scans, so I'm really hoping it's just paranoia!
Wishing the day away until 2pm...

MTBMummy Thu 15-Aug-13 09:01:16

Good Luck Ice, Coolhand and Baldrick - I'm so jealous you've reached your scan dates already grin

Maybe I commute in from West Berks/South Ox boarders I tend to use the bus if at all possible as it's just that little bit less crowded.

On the car front, we bought an SMax at the end of last year - it's an amazing car and we have so far managed to fit 3 children all in child seats and 4 adults in it comfortably - so I can highly recommend one if you need a spacious car.

MTBMummy Thu 15-Aug-13 09:02:55

Rock we're not thinking about a gender scan, but we are hoping we get lucky as we did with DD who had her legs wide open at our dating scan, so it was fairly obvious it was a girl, although we may change our mind if this one isn't as clear

rosyryan Thu 15-Aug-13 09:21:02

It'll be a surprise for us, so no extra scan at 16 weeks.

No car here. We live in zone 3 so no real need.

Good luck to all those with scans today. It's such a nerve wracking time. Surely at least one of us has to be having twins though!

commsgirl Thu 15-Aug-13 09:43:50

mummy thinking about you and your friend.

We don't want to find out the gender. I do keep swaying a little but I think I'd be really mad at myself if I didn't stick to not finding out.

Good luck to all you ladies with scans!

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 09:56:05

MTB So you knew the sex at your 12 week scan with your DD?

I didn't even know that was possible, and now I'm even more excited for my scan next week! grin

stephie101 Thu 15-Aug-13 10:10:11

Marking my place...

Been busy getting back into work, got some challenging work coming up..Now been a non smoker for over a week smile
Hope everyones well.. xx

Edamame Thu 15-Aug-13 10:14:27

Thanks cool, I have done just that and feel a bit better because even though I'm still miserable, it's a move in the right direction and I love my friends. I also booked an appointment with a counsellor who specialises in pregnancy, ante/post natal depression etc just in case.

Factoid: British women eat more crisps than any other demographic.
Next up: Nice 'n' Spicy NikNaks which might be too much taste-wise but with their beguilingly random shapes and rough texture have a truly outstanding mouthfeel <crisp wanker alert>

Positive news for me: midwife says I'm low risk despite being 41 and can use the MLU which is my strong preference. Obvs that might change later on but am relieved. Having a Harmony test in a week partly because they do a dating scan and otherwise I'd have to wait til mid September to see the bean and that's ages away.

So sorry to hear about your friend mummyP sad.

Edamame Thu 15-Aug-13 10:19:03

Stephie that is totes awesome lady! From my own tedious experience, please remain vigilant - there's no such thing as one cigarette.

I suspect we will find out the gender. DH is keen to know and I remember my best friend telling me her experience - she was adamant she was having a girl. At her scan she found out it was a boy and she was so shocked she said it took her several days to get her head round the news. She said she was glad she found out before the baby arrived because she would have hated to be dealing with those "disappointed" feelings with a newborn.

Don't get me wrong, she loves her son to pieces but she was so convinced that she was having a girl that it was a shock to the system for her.

greymoose Thu 15-Aug-13 11:30:22

got my booking moved to the 22nd when i'll be 11+6 which i'm happy about! good luck on scans today - so excited for you all!

on the cars, we're looking into getting another labrador which is another reason we need extra space so maybe my going a bit over the top for a small woman, an average male and a baby was a blessing...

apprentice i know, I'm usually really good at parking and just am going back and forward for about 20 minutes just to get in the lines...

lyra i think mine's the same sort of size as your chrysler and abi's jazz, i got the mercedes b class because it looked spacious but compact but i think i underestimated it because it's actually huge because like marmite i am used to a mini, which i hate anyway because its so cramped but also i can barely open the doors on as it is!

greymoose Thu 15-Aug-13 11:32:26

i skimmed mummy, sorry to hear your friend's news flowers

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 11:33:13

Do you all get 20week scans? I assuned that was when you could find out the sex. Those of you booking 16/17 week scans - does your LA not do 20wk ones?

Am shock and grin at the idea that I could find out the sex in two weeks at the dating scan and not have to wait til 20wks!

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 11:36:55

I've been reading up on it Mortified and in 46% of cases the sonographer can accurately tell you the sex at 12 weeks shock

I didn't even know that was a possibility. All depends on the way the baby is lying etc. Exciting!!

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 11:38:31

I didnt want to know with DC1, but am keen to know this time round. I know theres the Nub Theory to try and work it out but I cant see it myself.

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 11:42:07

Nub Theory you say?

<scurries off to do more research>

faithfulandtruthful Thu 15-Aug-13 11:45:58

I got my letter about my 1st scan 28th August, I'll be 12 weeks exactly according to my dates.

Actually feeling excited for the first time.

Hope everyone has good scans today.

F&T

Hooray! Rosy & Rock, it's nice to know I'm not the only household without a car. We'll be über-fit from pushing a pram everywhere smile

Enjoy your scans, ladies. I need to go to my EPU next Tuesday to pick up a prescription and I've decided to ask them for a sneaky scan that day. I will be exactly 12 wks and my actual dating scan is 13+2.

MummyPig24 Thu 15-Aug-13 11:59:21

Thanks. We are in the process of drawing up a rota to help her out over the coming months.

Feeling shit today. Starving, sick and tired. Kids driving me up the wall being super whiney.

I really don't want to find out the gender. I want a surprise. Dh would like to know but is happy not to. He wanted to know last time and I didn't really but we did find out so he kind of has to bend to me this time!

Deffo not finding out the sex here, not with a first baby.

I'll be finding out. DP has a string preference for a boy so if it's a girl better that he finds out now than at the birth. I have a mild preference for a boy but would be just as happy with a girl. Think of all the pretty dresses I could buy! grin

We are only finding out due to impatience!!! Seems like we have waited so long for it that we now just really want to know! No preferences here either way. I have to get knitting after all!!

Cannot wait for scan news!!

MTBMummy Thu 15-Aug-13 12:35:50

Hot I think you've got to be fairly lucky with position of the baby, but you can find out, the sonographer did say not to bet our life savings on the sex, but that she was 95% sure DD was a girl

I would prefer a boy as there are none in my family. It would be something rather special, I think.

...but, then again, they wank an awful lot, don't they?

PiratesMam Thu 15-Aug-13 12:38:21

I don't want to find out - I like the big reveal at birth: It's a....! Hwvr DH wants to find out, and I suspect when DS realises there's a baby coming, he'll want to know - if he has a strong preference for a boy (which I think he will) then we may find out to prepare him. DD won't care, she'll just want a baby. Sadly for DS I'm sure this is another annoying sister

MummyPig24 Thu 15-Aug-13 12:39:40

Last time there were big signs in the scan room saying "we will not tell you the sex of your baby at the dating scan, so please do not ask"

PiratesMam Thu 15-Aug-13 12:39:48

My friend was told at 12 weeks the sonographer was 70% sure the baby was a boy; then got told at 22 wk scan it was a girl!

Sarahb8990 Thu 15-Aug-13 13:02:59

My dh's cousin was 100% that she was having a boy after the sonographer at the 20 week scan told her she saw a winky. She even went out and bought everything blue to end up givin birth to a girl!

We have our first pregnant Sleb due around the same time as us: Nadine from Girls Aloud has announced her pregnancy. To be fair she's not said how pregnant she is, I'm just assuming she's around 12ish weeks.

Exciting times Frankel!!

What a nightmare Sarah! I know some hospitals won't tell you the sex, I think that's why gender scans arose in the first place.

rosyryan Thu 15-Aug-13 13:24:23

Ime, myself and with friends, private places will nearly always tell you at 12 weeks, the nhs almost never will until 20 weeks. And private places never ever need you to have a full bladder! There ends my scan wisdom.

Dabarai Thu 15-Aug-13 14:35:26

OMG Pram, your post made me snort in a public place!!

Dabarai Thu 15-Aug-13 14:36:43

The one about wanking. grin

Dabarai, did you produce one o' them long strings of snot out of one nostril when you snorted? grin

Nadine from Girls Aloud has periods??! stick insect

Rockchick1984 Thu 15-Aug-13 14:48:33

Hottie with only 2 options surely there's 50% chance of them telling you the correct gender at 12 weeks grin

My hospital will tell you the sex at 20 week scan, but it feels too long to wait with no scan and no kicks after last time's miscarriage so I'm having a gender scan more for the scan than for finding out what I'm having. My dad has offered to pay as its my wedding anniversary when I'm 17 weeks so not going to say no!!

Wuxiapian Thu 15-Aug-13 15:42:34

Finally got my scan date!

Next Wednesday, 21st August! I'll be 12.4.

Yay!!

Hurrah Wux!

Rock it's my wedding anniversary in my 17th week too!!

Prambo you do make me guffaw.

Hurrah wuxia grin

My midwife just called, looks like they are going to slot me in on a cancellation next Tuesday. Just got to wait for a call to confirm the time.

I should add, while we are doing anniversaries, I'll be 15+3 on our 5th wedding anniversary grin

Great news Frankel! On both counts grin

Sarahb8990 Thu 15-Aug-13 16:17:42

Also adding about anniversaries, I conceived on my 2nd anniversary according to my dates :-)

mimili Thu 15-Aug-13 16:19:04

My second anniversary was yesterday!

Coolhand Thu 15-Aug-13 16:31:15

Good scan news here and now it actually feels real. I had a super active baby in the womb who was kicking and waving non stop.

V positive experience at the hospital as well. If pregnancy progression is fine, They will be super supportive of my decision for VBAC, will be happy for me not to have CFM and will use the handheld monitor instead and even said they would be happy to let me have a water birth which I thought was going to be a definite no. They booked me in to have a chat with a senior midwife at 29 weeks when we have a clearer idea of how pregnancy is progressing and we can look at birth options together. So pleased!

Oh and on full bladders, mine was too full and obscuring the scan. Told me to go and empty half of it -starting and stopping peeing when you really need to go is not easy! She told me no need for full bladder at 20 weeks.

In terms of dates, my doc had me down as 5th March (as he was working off 28 day cycle and mine is only 25). Baby today measured 3rd March but she said we can just leave it at 5th March as that is close enough.

Edamame Thu 15-Aug-13 16:31:54

I'm not married shock
But we have been together for a whole year grin

Smillie0 Thu 15-Aug-13 16:32:38

Our first anniversary is on Sunday I'll be 10+4.
We are going to Devon to pick up a new purchase, its all very romantic!!

Frank what good news, bet you can't wait.

Does anyone know roughly how long I should expect to be at the hospital for 12 week scan? DH may or may not be at work, he is talking about taking an extended lunch break if he is, I think it might be a very long lunch.

F&T

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 16:35:51

While all this Anniversary chat is going on it will be mine and DP's on the day of our scan (21st). Tis going to be a good day smile

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 16:37:51

wuxia Scan buddies!!

Edamame, we're not married either and have only been together for a year.

Hotcross and Wux, we're all scan buddies smile

SmillieO, my letter says to allow an hour for the scan. I don't know how it can take that long. I don't remember previous 12-week scans taking so long.

apprenticemamma Thu 15-Aug-13 17:02:27

happily unmarried, together eight years....cart before the horse as darling catholic mother says wink !

RaspberrysAndIcecream Thu 15-Aug-13 17:05:02

Hi Ladies,
I'm de-lurking to say hello!! I didn't want to join until we'd had our early scan, which we had today.
I'm 8+3, due March 24th.

I just wondered if u could answer a question for me? Are any of u going to Kings for ur 12 week scan? How quickly did u get a scan date?
I already have a date for my local hospital but my gp referred me to kings - I'm getting impatient to know when my scan will be!!

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 17:05:17

Less than a week to go Lyra. I don't think I've ever been so excited for anything!

All of you who still haven't joined the FB group need to come on over, there is scan pictures and bump pictures galore grin

MummyPig24 Thu 15-Aug-13 17:06:03

Hurray wuxi

Good news coolhand saw your piccy on fb smile

Our first anniversary, well the baby will be around 2/3 weeks old! Mil was saying last night how they would love to send us to the hotel where we had our reception for the night to have dinner and champagne etc. Obviously that won't be happening but it's a lovely idea.

Talking with my aunt today about how I cleaned all upstairs yesterday, I said "I don't know what came over me." She said "perhaps you're pregnant". I quickly carried on talking!!

greymoose Thu 15-Aug-13 17:11:53

Congrats to those who had their scans today!!

Our anniversary has been and gone before pg but according to one of my scans the due date is my birthday, the baby will be a few weeks old, but not like we usually celebrate it anyway, so lazy haha!

Hi raspberrys grin

Fb group is full of pics, bumps, scans, DC, partners etc. Come and join!

Beccadugs Thu 15-Aug-13 17:19:35

Talking of anniversaries, it is our first on Sunday!
It was the hottest day of the year last year, and I was so hot in my wedding dress.

As I am still suffering from morning sickness from HELL I'm not sure we will be doing anything fancy!!

Edamame Thu 15-Aug-13 17:37:39

Smillie0, my scan letter says 45 minutes (at UCH), they have been extremely organised so far, even booked in my 16 week appointment (because it's my first baby) last week

Weclome Raspberrys and woohoo on the scan! Congratulations!

mimili Thu 15-Aug-13 17:51:41

Hi Lyra am planning on joining straight after my scan!!

Now keep those fingers crossed for a scan date!

I've been told to book my 16 week appointment myself once the scan has given me the all clear. They've already given me the pot to pee in for it grin

IceNoSlice Thu 15-Aug-13 18:24:56

Hi folks, I have good scan news smile

Saw the little bean jumping up and down and looking like an actual, y'know baby! Was lovely.

Re: time it takes. Totally depends on the hospital and luck on the day, I suspect. At Birmingham women's for DS, we were there for over 3 hours. Mostly waiting. Today at Worcester Royal we were seen after about 15 mins. They scanned for ages because the baby kept wriggling and getting into any position except the one they needed for the nuchal scan. So we were in the clinic for about 45 mins in total.

Am very happy smile

Welcome, raspberry

Congrats Ice! Lovely news.

Hi Raspberry!

Great news Ice smile

SoSurprised Thu 15-Aug-13 19:15:06

Congrats Ice! That's lovely

Coolhand Thu 15-Aug-13 19:45:39

Good news Ice - I'm still on a high from this afternoon. It now feels real! Was waiting to see how things went for you.

Wuxiapian Thu 15-Aug-13 19:58:27

Yay, Cool and Ice!!

Hot and Lyra, it's so exciting to finally have a date! The wait until then is going to take aaggeees! Are you am or pm? I'm pm.

Was told in my previous 2 pregnancies to have full bladder for scan.

commsgirl Thu 15-Aug-13 19:59:25

Welcome raspberry

Congrats to those who had scans today - so exciting!

HotCrossPun Thu 15-Aug-13 20:16:32

I'm 2pm Wuxia

I know, it's not often I wish a weekend away but I just want it to be next week NOW!

My letter doesn't mention a full bladder. I'm chubby though so I'm going to make sure it's full so I get a good picture grin

JustCallMeBaldrick Thu 15-Aug-13 20:18:18

Good scan news here too smile

Baby was unco-operative, but did a little dance with a wave at the end! It was in a good position for the Michael measurements though.

I'll join the FB group when I get on the laptop, and post my pics of #4!!

JustCallMeBaldrick Thu 15-Aug-13 20:18:58

*nuchal (stupid auto-correct)

Imeg Thu 15-Aug-13 20:22:33

Hi,

Feeling a bit grotty this week: lots of retching and threw up my dinner the other night. Dizzy/tired too. Fortunately work is quieter for me in the summer, and I've got next week off (can't wait to doze on the sofa!)

I have lost a bit of weight, although unsure of exact amounts as hadn't weighed myself for a while before pregnancy. I am eating but not as much as normal. I presume it must be quite common to lose a bit of weight in early pregnancy when feeling sick so presumably not too much of a problem?

I'll be 11 weeks tomorrow, have a scan on Monday, fingers crossed it's all ok. Very much hoping I'll be feeling better soon before work gets busy again in September.

Welcome Raspberry.

Congrats on the scans, ladies.

I hope I don't sound harsh but I am uncomfortable with inviting brand new members to join the facebook group. We have no idea who they are and I've too much to keep private, if I'm honest. I don't know what the answer is but the antenatal thread I was on last year didn't allow newbies to join the facebook group until it was established they were a) real and b) going to stick around.

...I've just realised: my private facebook wall will remain private regardless. As you were, then... confused

Wux, mine is at 2.30pm. I've been told to come with a full bladder.

Dabarai Thu 15-Aug-13 20:46:45

Welcome to all newbies!

Ice and CoolHand LOVELY pics, so can't wait for mine!

Pram - no snot, I am trying to behave in a dignified way, like!

Our anniversary is in February, I will be 38 weeks and counting! My OH's birthday is in March and he gets tadpole as his present!

We don't own a car,both cycle to work usually. We could get a little trailer to go with our Bromptons... smile

Wuxiapian Thu 15-Aug-13 20:48:40

We'll all be there the same time, then, Hot and Lyra. My appointment is 2:10pm.

I'm hoping they're able to find baby - I'm carrying 2 stone extra blubber - most of it being on my gut. Tut.

commsgirl Thu 15-Aug-13 20:51:46

imeg I've lost 13lbs. Midwife not worried as I'm keeping most food/water down.

Imeg Thu 15-Aug-13 21:11:35

Thank you commsgirl, I don't think I've lost as much as you so that's reassuring.

I think my scan letter says that I need a full bladder. When I went for the early dating scan I followed the instructions perfectly, was in absolute agony bursting for the loo while they went through endless forms and explained about the gel and the probe in words of one syllable. Then when I got in the scan room they said that as it was so early they weren't going to bother trying a transabdominal scan and so sent me straight to the loo... Was a little annoyed but on the other hand it was such a relief to pee I hardly noticed the indignities of an internal scan!

Indie1981 Thu 15-Aug-13 21:35:07

Hi! Thought I'd stop lurking after I had my 12 week scan today and got a wave from Beanie. I'm expecting my first on 1st March (wow feels so weird to be typing that!) Had IVF so felt like a loooong wait to get to today. Hope everyone's symptoms are easing, you all seem like a lovely bunch.

Teddybear4 Thu 15-Aug-13 22:07:41

Just checking in after a manic couple of days out with the squids. Absolutely shattered...

Great news on the scans. Wonder who will win the twin lottery?!

PiratesMam Thu 15-Aug-13 22:58:06

Hi all!

Shitting myself about twin lotto. Don't let it be me! (Although intrigued to see what a twin scan would look like?!)

Great news about the scans today, am loving seeing the pictures on FB and trying to guess gender.

raspberries if you mean Kings College Hospital then give the Harris Birthright Centre a call, they should be able to help you, that's where they do the scans. Google for their number.

I managed to get a nap today. It was bliss. I am so shattered this week, week 11 is a shocker isn't it. Plus (TMI) dry retching loads, it really creeps up on me. Have told the DCs I have a cough!

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 23:00:07

Can I ask - if I join the FB group, does anyone in my FB know?Im.not ready to sharepg news yet.

PiratesMam Thu 15-Aug-13 23:01:21

Mortified no don't worry it's a secret group so no one can see if you join or what you do on there, apart from us! grin

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 23:03:34

Ah okay! «hunts out link»

PiratesMam Thu 15-Aug-13 23:09:22

Message greymoose as I think she's the admin for the group.

MortifiedAdams Thu 15-Aug-13 23:16:05

Oh lordy I just sent message to Greygoose blush

greymoose Thu 15-Aug-13 23:24:54

Sorry mortified been lazing about! Messages you now!

Rockchick1984 Fri 16-Aug-13 03:43:54

Welcome Indie and congrats! Glad the scan went well.

Mortified grin missing the vodka????

Re full bladder, don't overdo it with drinking loads, I asked and they told me a pint of water an hour before the scan is plenty. They also said that although they can scan without it, the picture will be clearer with full bladder and if baby is in the wrong position then going for a wee can shift them.

MummyPig24 Fri 16-Aug-13 04:41:03

I can't sleep! This happens every night, usually around 2 so I'm later tonight. So annoying though, I toss and turn and can't drift back off. And now I need a wee. I might just cut my losses and get up! At least I would get a few hours peace.

x0gawjus0x Fri 16-Aug-13 06:29:35

Congrats on everyone having their scans you cant be 12 weeks yet though? Or are some due
e feb cos my edd is 2nd march im not 12 weeks till sunday, so glad youve had positive scans smile how exciting.

mummy i feel your pain i wake up about 3.20 every night for a wee then really struggle to get back to sleep sad

my scan letter says nothing bout a full bladder amd in my 9 wk scan she asked me to have a wee before we started and could see bubba with normal scan not internal clar as day xx

If you want the nuchal test then the "12 week" scan can be done anytime from 11+3 to (I think) 13+6. I'll be 12 weeks exactly, by my calculations, on my scan day.

RaspberrysAndIcecream Fri 16-Aug-13 07:33:52

Thanks piratesmum ill give then a call.
It looks like ill get two scans at 12 weeks as my midwife told me at my booking in not to cancel my one at the local hospital as she's worried ill fall off the radar for the local hospital. She said just to tell them to do a straightforward scan with no tests, but then ill get my notes and my 20 week will be booked straightaway.

I'm also dry retching - been doing it for 2 weeks now and it's driving me up the wall.

I've also going off tea and cake shock sad I really miss tea, but not cake. It'll make today easier tho, I've got to make 50 cupcakes for a friends little ones 1st birthday party tomorrow!! grin

Hope everyone has a good day.

Lambchop14 Fri 16-Aug-13 07:34:51

Hi, haven't said hello for a while... Hello!

What is the story with this Facebook page everyone is talking about? Is it private or can friends see that I've joined?

IceNoSlice Fri 16-Aug-13 07:42:28

Mummypig I'm the same with the night waking. Wake up somewhere between 2-4 most nights, get up for a wee and really struggle to get back to sleep. It sucks. I don't have a solution sad

x0gawjus0x Fri 16-Aug-13 07:55:12

Oh right I see frank

i couldnt stop crying last night once i got in bed no idea why, bit nervous cos mw said due to mum and nans mental health could have an impact on me during pregnancy hope it doesn't sad x

Lambchop14 Fri 16-Aug-13 08:16:53

Also wanted to ask... My symptoms all disappeared at 9 weeks and haven't come back. E.g nausea and boobs growing. Has anyone else experienced this? I'm nearly 11 weeks. I have a huge bump but suspect this is due to eating a lot more in the last 6 weeks when feeling sick. Help! Really nervous about my 12 week scan. Hope all is ok smile

MTBMummy Fri 16-Aug-13 08:27:35

Morning all,

Welcome Raspberry and Indie

My fears of something not be right earlier this week because my symptoms had let up on Tuesday have all disappeared, vomming again, feel like death and can now include kidney pains in with everything else.

Sorry for the moan, I just want this sickness to be over, so that I can start feeling like normal again.

littleABI Fri 16-Aug-13 08:31:07

Hey ladies, so exciting about these scans! My letter didn't say how long appt would be, its 8.35am (in September) but I don't need full bladder. Nor did I for early scan.

I've been feeling v.emotional too, especially as DH is under stress at work and I feel so guilty because I get summer hols off as I work in a school.

gawjus I hope things go ok for you health-wise

raspberry I know what you mean about missing cake, I've gone off a lot of sweet stuff... Doesn't stop me fantasising about Victoria sponge or choc brownies though! Poor confused tummy.

HotCrossPun Fri 16-Aug-13 08:50:43

Raspberrys Off cake? shock

I can't stop thinking about sweet things. My online shopping delivery is coming in a few hours and out of £50 worth of stuff I think there is about 3 actually dinners. The rest is delicious treats.

For breakfast this morning I'm going to have a flapjack, white chocolate chip cookie, branflakes and maybe some popcorn grin

For everybody asking the FB group is totally private. I had a bit of a panic when I first joined and somebody tagged me in a post, but because it was done through the secret group it doesn't show to anybody outside the group.

MummyPig24 Fri 16-Aug-13 09:00:06

I got up at 5 and came downstairs to watch tv. Kids got up at 6 and joined me. Feels like midday now though! Was planning a trip to the park this morning but its pouring with rain so that's going to be a no go.

I'm starving. All the flipping time. I've had a bowl of fruit and fibre, a tangerine and two breadsticks and I'm still so hungry that I'm on the verge of puking. Can't wait till this first bit is over and I feel better.

I too keep waking in the night. If it's not for a wee, it's cos of weird dreams. So annoying!!

I have Also gone off tea and cake. Though I can't get enough of Jaffa cakes!

x0gawjus0x Fri 16-Aug-13 09:30:00

Jaffa cakes yummyyy

I cant stomach anything at all except certain things like yesterday u really wanted cheese on toast and the thought of anything else at all made me queezy

today its jacket potato with tuna and mayo so looks like in going to starve as have no tuna or mayo.. sad x

x0gawjus0x Fri 16-Aug-13 09:37:54

greymoose could you inv me to group on my new fb i added you, i couldnt verify my old one for some reason x

Gawj I'm the same. There are only certain things I can't ear, everything else is a no go. I'm also quite fond of crumpets with lime marmalade of them. And peas and sweet corn. And fresh fruit juice. I have never been a fussy eater till now grin

JK10 Fri 16-Aug-13 09:50:18

Hi everyone! Congratulations on all the scans! I'm gonna go over to see the pics in a min, so exiting! I have stupidly lost my scan letter, my 2 older kids read everything now and my dd was being nosey when I was holding the letter and on the phone to change the app, so i quickly hid It! But have no clue where!! I always do silly things like this then spend days trying to figure out what the hell I've done.

Back to the car thing, we have a Honda frv which has 3 seats in the front and 3 in the back and a normal boot which is great, but gonna have to change for a 7 seater unless dh is happy to hold on the back on a skate board. Anyone have a 7 seater with an actual boot?

I'm off most sweet things, tea and coffee. Haven't weighed myself since I was 4 weeks pregnant and wouldn't be surprised if I've lost weight as I seem to have no appetite most of the time.

I've also got a strange sensation in my mouth - like my rate buds are all dead and everything tastes bland.

Allegedly craving salty foods means "boy" and sweet things "girl". I'm not sure what an a erosion to those foods mean though!

x0gawjus0x Fri 16-Aug-13 10:18:25

Haha maybe grin I even turned down an indian yesterday (fave food ever) thought of it made me gag... My cheese on toast was lovely, altho today that makes me feel sick too.. Wondering whether to walk 15 mins in rain to get some tuna blush

lol frank im craving both depending on the day of the week sad

I say brave the rain Gawj! It will only bug you if you don't grin

I'm definitely more salty Frankel nbut then I always am!

greymoose Fri 16-Aug-13 10:26:41

all done gawjus! i also reckon you should brave the rain!

last night i did fancy mcdonalds chips in one of their toffee sundaes, the one near us had no ice-cream (typical) so we drove to the one over the other side of the city, ah pregnancy.

Er, "erosion" means aversion obviously blush

grin Frankel

MTBMummy Fri 16-Aug-13 10:55:21

I've finally ordered myself some maternity bras - they arrive tomorrow - it'll be so nice to have comfy boobs again

MTBMummy Fri 16-Aug-13 10:55:51

As an aside is anyone else slowly packing away all the clothes they don't fit into only to find you have about 3 items you can wear?

grin MTB I need to do that. It's also the clothes that don't show my tummy yet, as only 2 people at work know. What maternity bras did you go for?

x0gawjus0x Fri 16-Aug-13 11:34:34

Cant stop crying at one born ahhhhhh i want a baby now!!!

greymoose Fri 16-Aug-13 11:46:31

good luck to samsmother for her scan today, do we have anyone else on scanning duty today?

Good luck Samsmother!

Gawj I always cry at OBEM!

Sarahb8990 Fri 16-Aug-13 12:04:01

Good luck to everyone with scans today.
Re goin off tea, I'm the opposite it's the only thing that settles my stomach. That's how I'm gettin my sugar intake atm as I can't keep any food down again :-(

MummyPig24 Fri 16-Aug-13 12:04:45

Still so hungry. Ate a hobnob at my grandmas and then retched all the way to the co op, got some of those go ahead crispy slice things and had 2 of them. Just eaten a bowl of capaletti. Still starving and feeling sick.

MummyPig24 Fri 16-Aug-13 12:05:23

On the plus side I put on a pair of jeans today I was sure wouldn't fit. And they did so I can't have piled on many pounds.

Rang my midwife just now to ask her to bring my dating scan forward from 13+2 and she said 'you've no chance'. I'm royally fucked-off. On the plus side I reckon the picture will be pretty amazing at 13+2.

Could gleefully rip some fucker's head off today.

MTBMummy Fri 16-Aug-13 12:19:12

Maybe I went for these www.asos.com/Emma-Jane/Emma-Jane-Smooth-Maternity-Bra/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=477085&cid=5813&Rf900=4036&sh=0&pge=0&pgesize=36&sort=-1&clr=Black someone recommended them on here if I recall correctly, and tbh my M&S ones last time were hideous

They look like they would give you pointy tits. I love these and they have tons of colours.

...also ASOS is shit. I've had to send all maternity stuff back as the quality is appalling.

babybear9 Fri 16-Aug-13 12:38:37

I've had bad nausea every day for 4.5wks and thrown up at least once every day too. Woke up this morning feeling ok and rather than enjoy not feeling sick, spend the whole morning worrying!! Who knew pregnancy was this stressful!!!

Got my booking in at 1.30 smile I'm going to see if I can get a sneaky listen to the heartbeat.

Now I'll catch up on what I've missed today...

MummyPig24 Fri 16-Aug-13 13:15:23

In hell here. This week has been the worst so far. Feel so ill and short tempered. I'm bored, kids bored. I wish I had people I could call on to come and help or take the kids for an hour. It's hard right now and these moments make me doubt whether we are doing the right thing having another child. Feeling emotional today!

MummyPig, I'm sorry you'e so emotional and full of doubt. I'm going through a rather insufferable trauma on the home front and am just in devastated floods of tears. Can't/won't talk about it here but I'll be thinking of you today xx

greymoose Fri 16-Aug-13 14:14:54

Hope you're both ok sad

April13 Fri 16-Aug-13 14:18:51

hope you are OK pram and mummypig x

PiratesMam Fri 16-Aug-13 14:26:46

Sounds like everyone is ready for a decent weekend. Mummypig I am with you - am good for nothing, kids bored, annoying each other, am clearing up poo after my DD.... Feel like absolute shit. This is a low point! 11 weeks is awful!

Pram whatever is happening, I really hope you have support. Can you call t'Husband? Or anyone else? Hope you are ok.

sams hope scan goes ok and leaves you feeling positive - its been such a roller coaster for you. Hopefully this marks a turning point in your luck.

Lambchop14 Fri 16-Aug-13 14:40:52

Sorry to sound selfish but it feels like hardly anyone ever replies to me. Is it because you think I'm talking a load of nonsense??

It's probably because the thread seems to move so quickly Lambchop, with so many of us posting its easy to get "lost" amongst it all.

Pram hope you are ok deary.

PiratesMam Fri 16-Aug-13 14:53:31

Gah Lamb I actually meant to reply to your post about disappearing symptoms in my last post but because I was on my phone I couldn't see previous posts and so forgot! Lots of us have experienced symptoms going up and down; hopefully it's nothing to worry about - if you're 11 weeks now is your scan soon?

Lamb I'm the same, im normally on my phone. You're definitely not talking a load of nonsense smile. The thing with this pregnancy malarkey, is that if you have symptoms, you worry. If you don't have symptoms, you worry. It's lose lose wink. I had a freak out when my boobs stopped hurting. Then they came back with a vengenance. At some point, symptoms will disappear, as the placenta starts to take over. When's your scan lovely?

Thinking of you Prambo x. You too Mummy. Is there anyone you could call to help with the kids? Maybe say you're unwell and just need an hour to yourself?

Lambchop14 Fri 16-Aug-13 15:03:35

Thank you for reassuring me NoMaybe and Pirates. I'm 11 weeks tomorrow. My scan is 28th. What stage are you both at?

MTBMummy Fri 16-Aug-13 15:03:48

Mummy if it helps I've had the same doubts and I'm not even having to dealing with kids during the summer holiday - I do hope you manage to get a break x

Pram I hope you're ok

MTBMummy Fri 16-Aug-13 15:08:41

Sorry Lamb definitely don't think youre talking rubbish or ignoring you. Unfortunately the thread moves so quickly that I think some of us miss posts.

I freaked out earlier this week as I felt ok for the first time in 5 weeks, no nausea, boobs and back seemed fine, and now it's all come back even worse. It seems as as if pregnancy it setting us up for the next 18 years of worrying

PiratesMam Fri 16-Aug-13 15:11:23

Lamb I'm 11 weeks tomorrow and my scan is also 28th so we're scan buddies! Mine's at midday, what time is yours? Can't wait - it will be the first "medical" attention I've had with this pregnancy as my booking in appt isn't until the week after!

Wuxiapian Fri 16-Aug-13 15:16:02

I'm 12 weeks tomorrow and still feeling totally shitty sad

Got a family birthday meal tonight and not sure how I'll make it through - nobody knows our news. DP wants to tell everyone next week after scan - still seems too early to me.

Had my booking in. The midwife let me listen to the heartbeat grin I heard it galloping away and even felt a couple of kicks, no doubt protesting about his space being pressed on by the doppler. Feeling so much more positive now and looking forward to my scan grin

Wuxiapian Fri 16-Aug-13 15:24:57

Yay, Lyra. Only 5 days to go...

Lambchop14 Fri 16-Aug-13 15:34:47

MTB, I think I would be ok if it was coming and going. Fingers crossed everything is ok.

Pirates, Yay!! That's exciting! My scan is at 1pm and its my first so this is all new to me. When's yours?

I can't wait, Wux smile
And now I can enjoy my declining symptoms rather than panicking about them smile

Springbells Fri 16-Aug-13 15:42:53

Hello, can I join? Recognise some of you from conception boards, and been lurking as mostly feeling rubbish and wanting to get closer to scan before joining. Not sure if there's a stats list, but Springbells, #2 due date 10th March.

Pram - great tip on the bras, thanks, m&s ones last time were bloody awful, they look lovely. Hope life improves soon.

Mummy, hang in there. Could you resort to Disney just for some down time for you?

Oh, and scan on Monday! smile

PiratesMam Fri 16-Aug-13 15:45:34

Lamb Well mine is supposed to be at midday so will probs be at 1 too! This is my third - and final!

Lyra that's exciting - and they (whoever they are) say a galloping horse heartbeat is a girl and a speeding train is a boy. Very scientific.

HotCrossPun Fri 16-Aug-13 15:48:17

I'm getting horrible pains just below my ribcage. Feels like a stabbing pain and its worse when im lying down or standing up straight.

I'm trying not to panic because I've not had any cramping/bleeding so far but I'm hoping it goes away soon sad

IceNoSlice Fri 16-Aug-13 16:04:04

Hotcross maybe call your MW or 111 if only for reassurance? I've not had that so can't help, but without bleeding etc, I'm hopeful you'll be absolutely fine.

Pram sounds miserable, hope you have a relaxing weekend and the situation improves (whatever it is) flowers

Mummypig are you a SAHM? It always strikes me as one of the downsides- no sick days or times when you can hand em over! Hope you get some respite at the weekend - can DH take them out for a while?

I am evil today. Took DS to the docs for his jabs. He screamed and screamed, poor mite. I made up for it with icecream after though which I ate most of
If anyone is peckish a greedy piggy then Morrisons caff are doing dessert for a £1 if you buy a sandwich, including chocolate brownie sundae. Mmmmmm. Sorry nauseus folks.

MummyPig24 Fri 16-Aug-13 16:07:22

Thanks everyone. Yes I am a sahm which I do love. But it's so hard when they need constant attention. I'm exhausted and I just need a break. I came upstairs and put a DVD on and the kids lay on the bed with me. I fell asleep through most of it. Dh will be home soon and I'm still in bed. Kids have disappeared downstairs. I guess I ought to get up but I feel so sick and weak.

pram I hope you are ok x

liberuna Fri 16-Aug-13 16:23:37

Lots of good thoughts for mummpig and pram. I haven't been able to eat anything but fruit non stop. Thought id pop out for a snack and managed to come back with a bag if sweets, chocs and crisps!

Anyone else have scan due on 29th ?

And has anyone thought of getting or had experience with private midwives? Got no family or friends close by so freaking out at my first pg!

Coolhand Fri 16-Aug-13 16:27:18

Mummy really hard when you're feeling like that. SAHM is a tough job. Hope DH can give you a good break this weekend.

Pram hope situation begins to resolve or that you get the support you need.

Hotcross could they be stretching pains? Def get checked out if they continue.

Rockchick1984 Fri 16-Aug-13 17:00:31

Hottie if they are so high up its far more likely to be digestion related, your womb is about the size of a grapefruit at this stage so wouldn't cause you problems below your ribs. I remember when I had DS being convinced that the pains I felt at one point could only be a miscarriage as they were agonising, turned out to be trapped wind blush so could easily be something like that?

Pram hope everything is ok thanks

Mummy I'm also a SAHM and am having some days now where I'm so short tempered, don't want to do anything but if we don't then DS is a little brat coz he's bored, just generally feeling rubbish. DH told me off (in a nice way) and basically said its just early pregnancy, try to remember its only a very short amount of time. He also pointed out that the less bored DS is, the easier my days actually are so I'm actually making my own life harder if we do nothing! Trying not to admit to him that he's right, but the days I force myself to go out and do our normal activities are so much easier than pj days grin

Liberuna I think private midwives aren't licenced any more after October. I wouldn't use one anyway, why pay upwards of £5k for something you can get free?

Welcome Spring

Thank you, everyone, for your supportive words. Unfortunately, Pirates, it is th'usband who is causing the pain. He has betrayed me (not sexually) and I have left him to come and stay at my mum's whilst I think. The problem is the longer I'm here the more questions and bitterness and resentment are building up and I'm getting myself into terrible state in my heart and mind. I feel as though I'm drowning...

Lambchops, I'm sorry you felt ignored. For what it's worth probably would've taken ore notice if you had been talking nonsense. I like a good old-fashioned lunatic smile

MummyPig (and anyone who needs some peace of mind), keep looking forwards and fuck the bastards.

Liberuna, have you had a name change or summat?

Welcome, Spring.

Imeg Fri 16-Aug-13 17:22:03

Springbells, I have my scan on Monday too.

Sorry to hear that some of you are having a tough time, I hope things get better.

I am wary of private medical care in general. My two grandmothers had hip replacements at a similar time, one private and one NHS. The NHS one had a much much better experience, with much more support and aftercare.

Beccadugs Fri 16-Aug-13 17:33:27

Oh pram I'm sorry things are stressful for you. We're all here to listen, hope your Mum is looking after you.

Welcome Springbells!

Sorry you're feeling crap mummypig

I have been feeling terrible for the last couple of days. 12 weeks in Tuesday so hoping it'll start to get better after that.

MummyPig24 Fri 16-Aug-13 17:44:39

Thank guys you have cheered me up! I've eaten toast and peanut butter, had a snooze and a bath and I'm feeling a whole lot better. I'm going out tonight to meet my friends at the Chinese, as a last supper before M begins her treatment for breast cancer. Hope I don't puke on the prawn crackers!

apprenticemamma Fri 16-Aug-13 17:52:47

hot cross...I have these and had last time I think..stretching pains. Mummypig hope you get some respite. Got huge respect for sahm but I know just how knackered it can be and i am only part time sahming. DVD and auntie ceebeeb all the way wink wink

PiratesMam Fri 16-Aug-13 18:02:27

Holy crap Pram that's a real shitter. Really glad you've got your mum to go to, having some space is crucial to get some clarity on the sitch. This is the last thing you need, hope you work out what to do for the best. Like Becca said, we are here for support too.

SAHMs I too have been a snappy arsey bint this week. Particularly as have been stuck indoors shovelling DD's shit! I do love being a SAHM but I was always nervous what pregnancy would do to my energy levels; fair to say it's mashed them and there has been a LOT of telly this week. DH often works until 9pm so it's a long bloody day.

Spring welcome! I'm not a fan of private midwives either; I think the main bonus is that you get the same person throughout your pregnancy and also to deliver your baby, but I know someone who had a HB with an independent midwife and it didn't sound like they were amazingly attentive, leading to something going slightly wrong at the end. Everyone was ok but I just thought for £3K it wasn't really worth it! And also pretty sure they can't practise from later in the year as the insurance issue if you're transferred into an NHS hospital from private healthcare is a total minefield.

Rockchick1984 Fri 16-Aug-13 18:18:23

Pram that sounds like a nightmare! Do you think its linked to all the stress of the IVF (not saying that's any sort of an excuse, but I know my DH freaked a bit when I was expecting DS, it took a lot of hard work but we came out stronger after it all) or is he just behaving like a nob? That link I sent you on FB means you can have a play with different financial scenarios, just to give you something to do if you want to focus on practical options.

apprenticemamma Fri 16-Aug-13 18:24:48

I think having a baby no matter how planned can put your relationship into a total tailspin. We planned and were happy fora second but dh and I have been freaking out and getting on worse than ever in 8years bc of all the stress. I've even found myself late at night doing some emergency single mum financial projections. Nuts. Things are improving with counselling and a little space apart has helped. Take care pram x

IceNoSlice Fri 16-Aug-13 18:36:20

Alcohol free wine and flowers for those with relationship stresses. Vent away, if you need to. After all we don't actually know your OHs so won't ever lay into them in a misguided protective mate type way.

In other news... Can't stop trumping today (TMI!). Obv I will be blaming PG, but can that really be the cause? I've heard of preg- related heartburn but not, ahem, wind.

I've unearthed a deception that has been going on forever, basically. The IVF did not drive him to it. What drove him to it was being a selfish and cavalier twat. I'm going to rip his throat out and consider whether I have any a) forgiveness in me and b) respect left. The one thing that brings me comfort is knowing that this is categorically not something that will break me as a human being. I have been broken in the past and nothing will ever have power over me like that did. I wish I could stop being surprised and hurt by others' weakness of spirit. When will I learn that humans are fallible and even those who worship us and would never wish us harm are capable of deception and weakness?

Dabarai Fri 16-Aug-13 18:41:32

Goodness me, loads of stuff going on here at the moment!
Lamb - I totally panicked when my symptoms went suddenly away around 7 weeks, booked an early scan. they came back with the vengeance. This is my first one, so I have no idea what is really going on. I am with you! Now starting week 12, scan on Tuesday trying to will the days to hurry up.
Mummy - can't really help much, as no experience with bored kids, but I have heard that occasional TV does wonders…
Pram – hope things will improve. Betrayal is a huge issue and it doesn’t matter if it’s physical or not, hurts the same, as I have learned from my own experience. For all it helps, I am here to offer a sympathetic ear. Hugs and virtual vodka also available.
Liberuna – I went to my hospital to the Early Pregnancy Unit and they do free scans. Maybe you could do something similar?
Hi Spring!
To everyone else feeling rubbish – sending positive online vibrations your way.

Wuxiapian Fri 16-Aug-13 18:41:43

Sorry to hear some of you are having a rough ride.

Glad you're feel a bit better, Mummy. I can (kinda) relate re kid stresses. I have a 6 month old - demanding as it is - and a 15 year old with Aspergers who is like 5 kids (and needs constant entertaining). Towards the end of the day and ontop of the awful morning sickness, I'm a wreck - physically and mentally.

Apprentice, I'm sorry you, too, have been laid low, but counselling is such a healthy way to move forward. Best of luck.

Ice, I am more than a little disappointed you will not be laying into my other half in a misguided-protective-mate-type way. Won't you reconsider?

Dabarai, thanks for the voddy but I'm teetotal. I'll raise you a brew though.

Pram I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this, crappy at the best of times but when pregnant - sheesh. You come across as a very strong woman, hang on in there.

My symptoms also seem to come and go. I feel at my best when I first wake up but within half an hour the background nausea kicks in. The only thing that is consistent is the extreme tiredness! I haven't slept so well in years!

Welcome to all the newbies (crap at keeping track of names!)

Dabarai Fri 16-Aug-13 18:57:07

Ah Pram, we have a whole cupboard of different teas, you choose! smile I can also sneak on Th'usband and kick him in a balls.

IceNoSlice Fri 16-Aug-13 19:35:16

Ok, you asked for it...

Oi! MrPram! What on earth are you playing at you loser? Don't you realise you are lucky to have such a wonderful lass as Prambo and you ought to be pampering her and respecting her, not playing silly buggers! Ooooh I could slap you!

<goes for a US style waving-pointy-finger-with-hand-on-hips move but the effect is ruined somewhat by northern accent>

So there. Don't mess. Ner.

Coolhand Fri 16-Aug-13 19:41:59

That's crap Pram and a lot to deal with when ordinary life is tricky at the best of times in early pregnancy. So glad you have your mum's as a refuge. Issues of trust and betrayal really go deep. Thinking of you.

Ice how have you got this far without problems with wind! It's a nightmare in pregnancy. To all the SAHMs believe me when I say I think you have the hardest job out there - was glad to return to work after mat leave last time just to get my head showered for a bit!

Edamame Fri 16-Aug-13 19:46:43

liberuna have you considered hiring a doula instead of a private midwife? A doula doesn't give medical advice but would get to know you before the birth, could be your birth partner if you wish and some provide support afterwards as well. A good friend recently hired one as a first time (single) mum and swears it was the best thing ever, described her as a sort of fantasy older, wiser sister, if that doesn't sound too hippyish. If it's the continuity you want, that might be the way to go - much cheaper than a private midwife too...

Ice, thank you for making me smile x

..and thank you, too, Coolhand and Frank.

littleABI Fri 16-Aug-13 20:09:55

Oh pram I hope you have all the support you need, and lots here from the Martians too!! Feel emotional for you :-( and just been a bit teary for a few days anyway.
This thread moves like lightening, but its so good to chat and read advice.

Back to symptoms:
One thing I've noticed is burping a lot more, never mind wind from other body bits! and noonday that hurt on and off, nausea that has waves... and lots of sneezing (no idea why)!

lyra so glad to hear about the scan :-)

Slippersandacuppa Fri 16-Aug-13 20:10:57

Pram That's crap - as if you need that now. You sound like a tough ol' bird but we're here when you need us. Hope you get things sorted out at your mum's - s'just rubbish when you want things sorted in your head and the only person who can help is the bloody problem.

Liberuna I had two independent midwives for my last one's birth. They were AMAZING (sorry, bit shouty, I know). We paid less than £5k (although they would have been worth that) - I know it depends where you are. They became my friends and signed me off about a month late because we all enjoyed the cups and chats so much! All pre- and post-natal appointments at home, really good advice and continuity of care. They got to know me so well that they ignored me when I told them I was in labour but not to come. They came anyway - good job as one only just made it and the other one arrived as we were having a post birth slice of toast and a chat about names. There was a big problem with insurance so they stopped practising but the independent midwives website has a new announcement on its website advising midwives to carry on practising for babies due after October this year as the government really wants to support them and our right to choose. I'm going to get in touch with mine and find out what their situation is. I'd have no hesitation in recommending them. We had a payment plan and when I checked with DH, he said he was happy paying that as it's one of the most important things ever.

Lambchops You sound like me with DH in real life. Exact sentence uttered today by me, "Why don't you ever listen to me??!!"

littleABI Fri 16-Aug-13 20:11:35

Sorry, auto correct wants noonday rather than plain old boobs!!

Slippersandacuppa Fri 16-Aug-13 20:12:50

Good grief, can't keep up - congrats all with lovely scan results!

Edamame Fri 16-Aug-13 20:13:10

Oh shit Prambo, that sounds serious.

commsgirl Fri 16-Aug-13 21:18:42

prammy sounds horrid. Thinking of you flowers

Massive respect to all you SAHMs - I'm struggling to deal with DP and the dog, can't imagine kids as well!

Everyone be kind to themselves x

ChocChaffinch Fri 16-Aug-13 21:20:48

I'm here, still puking. Now on second attempt antiemetic - maxillon. Still no bloody good.

BLEURGH

ChocChaffinch Fri 16-Aug-13 21:21:41

sorry to hear about your situ, prambo
is there any way back? can you talk it out in neutral territory?

thanks

PiratesMam Fri 16-Aug-13 21:56:23

Oh choc you're really going through it aren't you! Hopefully something will work soon. This stage is supposed to be the worst. I've retched about 20 times today, it's no fun.

Have we heard from samsmother? Don't know if I missed her today but couldn't see anything - hope it went well today.

SoSurprised Fri 16-Aug-13 22:13:40

Hi everyone this thread moves so fast! Choc I hope you feel better soon.
Will try to catch up on previous pages

commsgirl Fri 16-Aug-13 23:04:51

choc you poor love.

pirate I don't know if she's posted on here but she's put her lovely scan pic on the Facebook group smile

liberuna Fri 16-Aug-13 23:25:20

Dear Pram

Just think of all of those great things you know about yourself and remember all the times you have overcome challenges. I can't recommend enough going to counselling or coaching (slightly cheaper) to get you through.

Edame, Slippers & Spring
Thanks for the info. Wow didn't realise how expensive it could be, ill def look into a doula. Got the family so far away a little reassurance would be nice.

Well done for those with scans im so jealous

x0gawjus0x Sat 17-Aug-13 06:56:42

Lovely to see the pics of scans already im so happy its gone well for most people so far its amazing seeing them isnt it absolutely breath taking!!

I am on a fucking rage today ive woken up so angry bitten oh head off and my dogs and stormed out to work whilst throwing up stomach acid on the way lovely jubly!! Ah i cant WAIT for today to be over!!

MummyPig24 Sat 17-Aug-13 07:55:14

Pram how are you feeling today? Have you spoken to your man at all? Really hope things start looking up for you.

I had to drag myself out of bed this morning. Only to find the cat had shit on the kitchen floor and the wheelie bin is crawling with maggots. Fortunately I don't feel sick this early in the morning!

RaspberrysAndIcecream Sat 17-Aug-13 08:39:46

Pram - hope you're ok.
This early bit of pregnancy is so emotional, I can't imagine what it would be like having been through IVF as well. Just want to send you hugs flowers

I also can't imagine being a SAHM during this early bit - huge respect to u ladies - I work in childcare so I know how hard looking after children can be - I admit I've been clock watching while at work, on a countdown to home time!! blush

Has anyone had any nose bleeds? Sorry for tmi - I've woken yesterday and today and had to blow my nose. Yesterday there was a time bit of blood but today there was stringy blood coming out of my nose - yuck!! Normal or not?!!

Hi to newbie (sorry on my phone and can't see your name) waves smile

Rockchick1984 Sat 17-Aug-13 08:54:34

Raspberries I've not had nose bleeds but they are definitely a common pregnancy symptom.

5 days til scan day, not that I'm counting grin

JK10 Sat 17-Aug-13 09:28:04

Hi, hope u ok pram, I went through a rough time with DP when pg in the past and it is awful, so many things u need to think about a weigh up, u are thinking everything is finally working out and going well then, bam it all crashes. Best of luck to u x

Congrats on the scan yesterday!

Mummy I am a sah too with 4 dc's and I have been so tired but u are right that if u actually have something planned with them it makes the whole day a lot easier, it's just getting motivated to do it! Me, dp and eldest dcs went to see thriller last nite at west end on kids week and jumped on one of the bike taxis back to the station, had a fab time! So nice to do something a little different with them. (the muscly male dancers throwing themselves around the stage also helped to make it enjoyable!!) Hope today goes better! It's my dd's 2nd birthday party tomorrow and got 12 kids coming and bouncy castle so got loads to get done today, I'm sure it's gonna be another day of nagging and moaning at the kids!!

I think a doula maybe the way to go instead of a private MW think they kinda act like a friend as well as advice and support, u can choose if u want them pre-natal or for labour or post natal or for all 3! I've not used one but I was interested in becoming one!!!

Raspberries I had nose bleeds with my 1st dc but none of the others and I'm not someone who usually gets them but mw said at time all normal.

Gawjus hope your day improves, hate mornings like that.

Choc sounds awful, I have never suffered with actual sickness from pg, must make u feel terrible

Arrgghhh! This morning's post has been and nothing from the hospital to confirm my appointment on Tuesday angry. I have no idea what time my scan is!

I've called my midwife again to say I haven't had anything from the hospital, but had to leave yet another answer phone message. I also tried to call the ultrasound department direct only to find they are closed at weekends.

MummyPig24 Sat 17-Aug-13 09:40:24

Dh muttered something about soft play today. But it's not raining so I think outside is better. However nobody is dressed, the living room looks like toys r us has exploded and I need to Hoover and the kitchen floor needs mopping before I can even think of going anywhere.

Thriller sounds amazing, ds is a big Michael Jackson fan! He will happily dance like a maniac to an entire cd. I think dh has emerged from his pit finally. My turn for anlienin tomorrow!!

Beccadugs Sat 17-Aug-13 10:10:47

Morning All!

Feeling like utter death again today. I have irrationally taken against the dog, as her smell (not even particularly doggy) makes me feel worse, so am forcing her to sit on the other side of the room, and she is so confused...

I am also having blood when blowing my nose. Research seems to indicate that nasal blood vessels are weak, and with increased blood flow, this is quite common.

I am also feeling a bit down today as we were supposed to be going on holiday to the south of France (driving) and as I have been so sick we had to cancel. We should be there sitting on the terrace eating croissants (bluergh, but still).

I am sorry that the hosp are being so crap Frankel.

How are you Pram?

Good luck entertaining the DCs Mummypig, I say if your DH said softplay, send him on his way and get some peace and quiet to tidy up toysrus!

Coolhand Sat 17-Aug-13 11:22:04

Oh Becca cancelling a holiday is no fun. Could you plan a nice evening or something? I know it's hard when you're feeling so bad.

Mummypig that is not a pleasant start to the day.

Good luck with the birthday party * JK10*, sounds like a busy day.

We've had a very productive morning - managed to get to Sainsburys and M and S with DS before the hoards arrived. I also bought some mega blocks and a new fire engine for DS which he has been playing with for last 30 mins (which never happens). I've had a cuppa and got up on the thread. Momentarily feeling smug (until afternoon sickness descends and DS turns into wailing banshee).

ikab Sat 17-Aug-13 12:14:45

Hi all. Sorry to hear sickness is still rampant among the Martians. Im exhausted and nauseous but luckily not hurling.

I've been off radar for a few wobbly weeks but after seeing a wriggly Jnr at 9 weeks and 2 reassurance scan feel like I'm ready to start enjoying this more.

Trying to summon up energy to drag my arse out bra shopping before my under wiring pings off and injures someone. Anyone tried Bravissimo?

MummyPig24 Sat 17-Aug-13 12:21:37

I have bought bras from bravissimo and the underwriting came out of both of them after 2 months wear. So not good quality IMO.

Rockchick1984 Sat 17-Aug-13 12:35:01

I didn't do maternity bras last time (not very blessed in the boob department) I just bought primark bras in the correct size at each visit and pulled out the underwire - meant I had a better shape than in an unpadded bra, and wasn't bothered about wasting money spending £20+ on a bra then growing out of it a few weeks later!

emza78 Sat 17-Aug-13 12:40:19

Hi all, happy Saturday!

DD woke me up at 630 again, OH has been working every Saturday for this whole pregnancy (today included) and gets up at 5am every week day for work so I give him the coveted lie in on Sundays, felt pretty sorry for myself this morning that I've been up at 630/7, 7 days a week for the whole 9 weeks with not 1 lie in! We're going to see Book of Mormon tonight (hope I can stay awake past my usual 830 bedtime!) but he's said I can get lie in tomorrow, thank god!

I love bravissimo, my 2 double f's I bought last pregnancy lasted the whole 6 months and hopefully will do for this one too! Unfortunately shrank back to c cup after, would love to shop there all the time!

I've been getting nosebleeds too, and did last time

IceNoSlice Sat 17-Aug-13 13:03:30

I've had a couple of Bravissimo bras at the end of last pregnancy I was a DD. I was quite impressed with them and found the fitters quite good - far better than M&S who have been rubbish every time I've used them. however, with post BF shrinkage and losing 2.5 stone (sadly half a stone now back on) I am about a B cup now so not in Bravissimo's size range. A bit unsure what to do this time TBH. I like M&S bras, just not the fitting service. Had some truly nasty nursing bras last time and want to avoid that type (they were a mix of Jojo and Emma Jane).

If anyone finds nice ones that are good for those of us not blessed with boobs, please post. Prambo I checked out your link and they look good but I need a bit more padding/uplift/substance I think.

ikab Sat 17-Aug-13 13:28:38

Thanks ladies. Just popping out (fnar!) now. Normally a Bravissimo 30E so I think I def need to be fitted. Will update later.

Pram, hope you're ok. I understand how you feel, without knowing the circumstances. I've been through a very traumatic week myself so we can be trauma buddies confused
ExP has done some things this week that could have a devastating effect on my future with my sons. All out of jealousy that I'm having a baby with somebody that's not him. What he's doing is unbelievable to the point where I'm trying to block it out and not think about it and concentrate on this new baby instead. This week has been the straw that almost broke the camel's back but I'm hanging on in there because I have no other choice.
Pram, really hope you're doing ok and the space apart from th'usband is helping you get some perspective. I'll be thinking of you. Much love, sweetheart xxxx

Oh Lyra are you ok? You sound like a strongun.

Thinking of you too my lovely Pramela x

So sorry to hear about all the sickness. I have constant nausea though haven't actually thrown up. It's grim.

I too need new bras so am looking forward to the bravissimo feedback. I'm normally a 32F but am currently sporting the double boob look. Not good grin

I take my hat off to all you SAHMs. I think people can overlook what a tough job it is keeping little minds occupied 24/7. It's a job in itself!

I overheard a convo at work the other day between 2 new dads. It went something along the lines of 'oh it's easy being a SAHM, she gets to sleep when the baby does' shock. In my mind I dared them to repeat that to their wives wink

Maybe, I've been better but I've coped with the ex's crap for so long now and I will cope again. What he's done this week takes the cake though. So hard to deal with it all while worrying about this pregnancy. The stress has been hideous. Can't be doing my poor little bean any good.

On the subject of being a SAHM, I worked pt when my sons were little and I counted work time as being like time off. Work was so much easier than being at home. People who don't have children assume SAHMs spend their time lazing around watching daytime tv all day. Nothing could be further from the truth.

babybear9 Sat 17-Aug-13 14:41:35

Ladies, really thinking of you all who are having trouble with partners current or ex. Cant imagine how hard that must be on top of everything else right now. flowers x

Hello and thank you, thank you, thank you for thinking of me. Your generosity of spirit is honestly keeping me going. I am home but th'usband is not (he goes to visit his son on Saturdays. He'll be back at 7pm-ish). Of course I want answers to all my questions but right now I am still reeling from the power of the anger I feel and the sadness of the betrayal. He has risked mine and baby's livelihood and I don't think I can stay with him. I don't think he can change. I can forgive him but that really is not the issue here. I do not believe he will change.

This thought doesn't even make me feel sad right now; I'm too angry to feel sadness. He works eleven hours a day, five days a week, and is out visiting his son every Saturday from 10am-7pm. I don't see him nearly as much as I (and baby) will need to, so this deception I have uncovered is just making me see more clearly how little I need him. Love is not enough...

I will be back when I have more cogent thought patterns but right now I want to kick the living shit out of him. I have no sympathy or respect for him. He is a weakling and a cunt. I'm sorry..

greymoose Sat 17-Aug-13 16:43:56

sorry to hear the unhappy news, as always if you need anything we're all here if you need us!

on the bra front I'm not even bothering for a while as it's hard enough to get my size anywhere as it is let alone now.

im guessing we're still on the pram ban?

IceNoSlice Sat 17-Aug-13 16:52:04

Oh Lyra and Pram, flowers for you both. Sucky sucky sucks.

grey not sure. But we should lift it at some point as I need to set some eBay notifications up for a decent double pram! And I'm hoping some folks on here will have tips for me. I'm also considering a baby bay/ bed best crib thingy (attaches to the side of your bed) but their soooo expensive shock

IceNoSlice Sat 17-Aug-13 16:52:38

Gah their they're.

HotCrossPun Sat 17-Aug-13 16:52:48

Aw Pramala you poor thing thanks

With all the time and energy you put into conceiving this baby I can't even imagine how stressful all that is going on must be for you just now. sad

We are all here for you to vent and for virtual hugs and brew

greymoose Sat 17-Aug-13 17:06:42

is that a weed leaf on the mug...?!

greymoose Sat 17-Aug-13 17:07:01

just realised its the mn logo ignore me

Beccadugs Sat 17-Aug-13 17:34:55

Haha greymoose, I did think that too!

Ice, you can hire a baby bed nest from the NCT for 6 months, ehich comes with a new matress I think. Gives you the co sleeper for a fraction of the price!

MummyPig24 Sat 17-Aug-13 18:08:48

Oh pram what a shitty situation. Hope you are ok.

You too lyra.

We've been at soft play, tesco and the in laws today. Dh getting the kids some tea, I'm ravenous so their leftovers will be wending my way. I'm paranoid about getting gestational diabetes or ending up high risk if my bmi gets too high, but eating is the only way to stop myself feeling sick right now.

ikab Sat 17-Aug-13 18:10:20

Bravissimo update.

Score! They have about 5 soft non under wire bras. I thought I might try on a maternity bra but quickly decided to put that off for as long as possible, Urgh!

I tried on the Deco soft cup and the Sophie soft cup.
The latter is pretty especially in pink but it is made of thin material. My nipples are for hubbies eyes only and they are not exactly being shy at the moment so I went for the Deco which is a non under wired T-shirt bra. It feels secure but comfy at the mo.
One downside though, it only comes in nude and black, practical but v yawn...

Magpieblue Sat 17-Aug-13 18:39:19

I'm thinking of you pram (and lyra and anyone else currently dealing with knob-end men). This feels like quite a vulnerable time, but I think it's also a time when a massive female strength develops - like being a lioness or something, when the survival of ourselves and cubs becomes the most important, all-consuming thing. You will get through it, whatever happens. Grrrrr xxx

Coolhand Sat 17-Aug-13 18:44:22

Pram that is so tough. Thinking of you. You too Lyra - the last thing you need is to be dealing with ex's crap right now.

On bra front, I am not the biggest in the boob dept (somewhere between 32B/C normally). Last pregnancy, I went to a proper bra shop and got measured up - got a Hot Milk bra - expensive but fitted like a glove, very supportive and even sexy when I needed to feel a big better about myself. Hoping I grow into it this time again

commsgirl Sat 17-Aug-13 18:55:40

Pram and Lyra so sorry you're having to deal with so much crap. Stay strong.

IceNoSlice Sat 17-Aug-13 19:03:33

Coolhand thanks for that. I'll look into Hot Milk.

apprenticemamma Sat 17-Aug-13 19:53:49

Pram - thinking of you. Hopefully all the support both here and amongst your own, and thoughts of your beautiful wee bean can help buffer the pain. Lioness spirit - good analogy.

justmuddlingthroughit Sat 17-Aug-13 20:47:57

Hi ladies, haven't been here for a few days, meanwhile you've filled about 16 pages! I wish I could drop in more than I do, but I'll try to keep up as best I can...

pram and lyra, I am so sorry for what you've both been going through. I can't imagine having to deal with situations like that on top of everything else. You're both clearly exceptionally strong women to be coping as you are. Lots of virtual brew, cake and flowers for both of you.

Hope everyone who's feeling bleurgh starts feeling a lot better soon; I've felt a little nauseous and dizzy, and very tired, but really feel like I've managed to escape the worst. Although I'm just coming up to 9 weeks, so it could still hit me...

My boobs are KILLING ME though. They're not a great deal bigger (although new bras will be required), but they feel about twice as heavy and ridiculously tender. Kind of like I've been punched in the tits. Lovely.

Dabarai Sat 17-Aug-13 21:05:40

Oh Pram and Lyra, sending virtual hugs in your direction. No one deserves to go through that kind of shit.

MortifiedAdams Sat 17-Aug-13 21:58:12

Hi, is anyone around.

Just been to the loo and am seeing pink discharge with every wipe. Never had anything like this with DD1. Is it normal?

commsgirl Sat 17-Aug-13 22:03:35

mortified I had this a few weeks ago, only lasted an hour or so and then went away. Try not to worry but just keep your eye on it and listen to your body. If you see any red blood or start with any cramps then A&E. My midwife said I'd likely just irritated my cervix or it was implantation/settling in.

RaspberrysAndIcecream Sat 17-Aug-13 22:04:44

Hi mortified - I didn't want to not answer - but I'm sorry I don't know. This is my first pregnancy.

I think if its bright red then to be concerned.

Hopefully someone will be able to answer quickly.
flowers

MortifiedAdams Sat 17-Aug-13 22:12:34

I'm ten weeks so fingers crossed as it just seems so so close to the scan.

Tmi but it looks like when you do a massive sneeze andtheres pink in it from sneezing too hard,

Have put a pad on, to gauge how bad t is in a few hours.

Thanks for your good wishes ladies. You're all very kind.

Pram, hope your evening has been ok and that you and th'usband have talked things through.

Mortified, I had this a couple of weeks ago, pink cm followed by red streaks in cm later that day. I panicked but it only lasted that day and hasn't happened since. Try not to worry but keep an eye on it.

commsgirl Sat 17-Aug-13 22:18:58

That sounds really similar to what mine looked like mortified. Just keep an eye and try not to get yourself too worried - easier said than done I know!

MummyPig24 Sun 18-Aug-13 09:12:16

mortified how is it today?

Mortified, pink spotting is completely normal. There's. lot going on in there at the moment! But it completely freaks you out when you see it!! Cos of the drugs I'm on from the IVF, I get quite a bit of pink gunk! But it's all good x

MortifiedAdams Sun 18-Aug-13 09:51:44

Hi all, zilch on the pad and nothing when I wipe this morning phew

My cervix musthave been a ring of steel last time as I had nothing like this! grin

mimili Sun 18-Aug-13 11:07:14

Good news mortified

Great news Mort!

commsgirl Sun 18-Aug-13 11:30:14

Good news mortified

MortifiedAdams Sun 18-Aug-13 11:39:19

Thanks everyone!

HotCrossPun Sun 18-Aug-13 11:54:33

So glad to hear everything is fine this morning Mortified thanks

How is everybody else?

I can't believe we are heading into the second trimester. I reckon we are going to get through about 30 threads before we give birth at the rate we're going grin

SoSurprised Sun 18-Aug-13 11:54:44

That must be such a relief mortified!

I had my booking in appt today. The midwife is lovely smile and I m 12 weeks today! Can't believe it. Only found out 3 weeks ago. The midwife said I may be due end of feb rather than march (still haven't had dating scan) but I hope I can still hang around here. grin

MummyPig24 Sun 18-Aug-13 13:47:01

Ah good news mortified

rosyryan Sun 18-Aug-13 14:07:21

Phew, what a relief Mortified.

PiratesMam Sun 18-Aug-13 14:44:58

Mortified what a relief! smile

sosurprised 12 weeks already woohoo! Of course you can hang around these parts m'love - you may well still end up a Martian!

littleABI Sun 18-Aug-13 16:16:59

Congrats sosurprised very exciting :-) xxx

Brilliant news So!!!

MortifiedAdams Sun 18-Aug-13 17:01:10

So of course you can stay, even if you are a Febber! I couldnt imagine moving threads now.

Glad all seems well again Mortified.

Congrats on being 12 weeks already So, I'm 12 weeks on Tuesday with an EDD of 4th March, so if the Old Wives tale about first babes being early rings true (I was 2 weeks early) then I could well be looking at February too!

Lots of frantic phone calls to make tomorrow to try and confirm the time of my scan hmm

commsgirl Sun 18-Aug-13 17:51:37

Can't believe some of you are hitting 12 weeks already, it's going so fast now!

x0gawjus0x Sun 18-Aug-13 18:10:10

Hope everyones ok will catch up on thread soon lots to read! 12 weeks today and havent felt sick at all! I have however had some sharp shooting pains in my foofa and under my belly button has anyone else had this?

Still pissing like a camel! Just cleaned the bunnies out lovely day today!! Love love xx

lumpylumps Sun 18-Aug-13 18:16:37

I'm home!!! There's no way I can catch up on the thread so I hope everyone's doing ok. We had a fantastic week in Majorca just chilling and relaxing. I had a couple of symptomless days at first then the nausea came back with a vengeance and the sensitivity to certain smells and foods!!

My biggest problem at the minute is my bladder. I have a retroverted uterus and when I was pregnant with ds2 I ended up in hospital with a catheter in because as the baby grew and my uterus tilted over the right way it trapped my bladder and so I was unable to wee. The hospital were horrible and the consultant poo pooed me when I asked if it was pregnancy related. He basically told me not to be so stupid. Anyway, Dr Google explained what was happening and it was all ok.
It's happening again! I've had problems on and off for the last week or so but today it's really bad I sense another trip to the hospital coming up. I've never had any dealings with the epu do you think I could go there and bypass the horrible a&e people???

On the up side, it means baby's growing so things must be ok. Scan on Friday!!

Rockchick1984 Sun 18-Aug-13 18:18:43

I'll be 12 weeks on Tue, nausea and food aversions aren't as bad as they were - actually managed to eat a full meal today, and tried a bit of DH's pulled pork not like that you dirty sods without it making me want to hurl! It's worrying me a bit but logically I know symptoms like this ease off around this stage, I'm glad I've only got 4 days til scan day though!!

Gaw is it your scan tomorrow? Re the pains, do some pelvic floor exercises, if its the same as I had it seems to be referred to on here as Lightning Fanjo and is normal, but no one seems to know what causes it!

Speaking of pelvic floor exercises, I hope you are all doing them every day!! You will be glad you did in a few months time, I know far too many people who admit to weeing themselves in later pregnancy or postnatally!

Lumpy I found out at my early scan I've for a retroverted uterus too. I've found the last few days it's been harder to wee, even though I'm desperate! I'm hoping it will right itself soon!! Our EPU aren't great. I don't think they'd see you unless you were bleeding and in pain. A&E may be your best shot. Or maybe a trip to GP and see if they can phone ahead and get you straight through to gynae?

Gawj I have sharp pains just below my bikini line. Just another thing to think about wink

Rock I do my kegels everyday!!

Coolhand Sun 18-Aug-13 18:31:32

On no Lumpy think I would def go to GP tmrw, explain the history and ask for next steps. Nomaybe I'd make an appnt with GP as well just in case.

Thanks for reminder on kegels Rock, keep forgetting to do mine!

Think my symptoms are beginning to ease which is a relief. They did bang on 12 weeks last time so hoping I should be feeling more human soon. I have been experiencing lower back pain for weeks now which I didn't have in my last pregnancy. Have tried all kinds of yoga stretches but it's not easing. Think I'll be getting my ball out to sit on soon which seems ridiculous - last time didn't use it until the last 10 weeks or so.

Hello, everyone. Thank you for your good wishes. I will be brief and then I don't want to talk about it again: He arrived home last night at 7.20pm and went straight to the spare room. I literally didn't see his face (I was watching telly in the lounge) all night. I woke up at 12.10pm today and he had gone out. The cats were fed and he'd been for my Sunday paper. I pottered about for an hour then walked through the park to Tesco where I spotted him through a hedge beside the bowling green, alone, with his head in his hands. I ignored him and went on my way. I have only food-shopped for myself. I have been online and filled out a 19-page application form for social housing to be near my mum. 'Twould be a massive wait normally but, as I'm pregnant and my home is being demolished mid-September, I'm assuming this will give me some priority.

I thought I would feel lonely but, largely, I don't; he's hardly here anyway and when he is he is shattered.

I, too, am getting stabby pin-pricks up my vadge but am ignoring them.

I am mostly saddened by the fact that this pregnancy has become joyless since The Trouble. I am aware, however, that this is natural with what's going on, so I'm unperturbed.

I wish you all my friends in RL; I'm regretting fucking all mine off in recent years...

x0gawjus0x Sun 18-Aug-13 18:32:43

Ah ok rock and maybe must be norm then? Have it for like 5 mins an hour mostly in foof but had some in me belly!

my scan is tue at 3pm rock :-) proper prrroper scared bout telling my boss and dad lol im such a wuss xxx

*I wish you were all...

x0gawjus0x Sun 18-Aug-13 18:36:17

Pram i hope you get all the support you need from family and friends right now xx flowerscake

Oh Pram lovely. I'm so sorry to hear that. I really am xxx

Thanks Cool I think it's normal, I mentioned it at my scan and they weren't worried. Will mention again to midwife this week, but I think it's just one of those things.

Don't be scared Gawj! My boss already knows. As do my parents smile

MortifiedAdams Sun 18-Aug-13 19:09:48

Thinking of you Pram

...okay, so I do want to talk about it. Or, rather, I need advice: what do I do as he continues to isolate himself in the spare room? Do I demand answers (I've already got all the evidence I need and as he said on the phone the other night: 'I've been rumbled')? Am I to live with this mute for weeks and weeks in separate wings of the house until I finally get offered somewhere to live? What is he doing in that room without a telly (he doesn't read)? I am fed-up of this. Surely i am not the one who should approach him for 'crisis talks'? How long can a man survive in one room without human contact? Should I just carry on as I am?

IceNoSlice Sun 18-Aug-13 19:13:00

Oh Pram flowers

I may be naive and all that but I hope we can be RL friends (well maybe not the whole thread, but some folks). I met someone on MN who I consider to be a true friend. Ok so we live in the same village but we still met on any anonymous forum and became proper friends.

You sound very strong, I'm sure you'll get through this.

In other news... No stabby fanjo for me, but I am def showing now. Was hoping not to tell colleagues for another month, don't think i will last.

MortifiedAdams Sun 18-Aug-13 19:13:14

Could you ask him.to leave?

RaspberrysAndIcecream Sun 18-Aug-13 19:14:13

mortified glad you're ok.

pram you sound like one very strong lady, I sincerely hope that you're ok. flowers

Anyone else gone off food they usually love? I don't want to eat salad - at all. Usually eat a lot of it.

And when I'm feeling sick I eat pizza - no where the hell is the logic in that?!! Earlier there was no pizza in the house so I made myself cheese and tomato ketchup on toast. Was amazing!! grin blush grin and I seem to eat all day.

SoSurprised Sun 18-Aug-13 19:14:43

Thanks everyone, :D

x0gawjus0x I have been having pains across my stomach if I stretch or change position suddenly

lumpylumps welcome back, glad you enjoyed your holiday

Rockchick1984 I think I need to put a few post it notes around the house to remind myself as I keep forgetting

PramQueen1971 lots of hugs. Thinking of you

IceNoSlice Sun 18-Aug-13 19:18:27

Pram x-post. If it were me, I'd have to talk to him.

Thanks, folks, and Mortified, I'm so pleased you are okay.

Ice, the situation is this: he knows he's been 'rumbled', he knows (from a lengthy letter I left on Thursday before fleeing to my mum's) that I think he is a 'selfish, cowardly, hard-faced, feeble cunt' and I do not see a future with him in it. I told him, in the letter, My intentions regarding applying for social housing near my mum's. Now, as far as he is concerned that is all there is to be said. He clearly doesn't want to be verbally thrashed by me any more and has absolutely nothing to say which could a) explain his behaviour b) excuse his vile deceit or b) make me feel better. This is why he is holed up in the farthest room in the house.

I can't honestly see that his mute isolation is anything other than sensible, given that I am capable of brutal violence and intellectual triumph in arguments (not necessarily in that order). Ugh. I'm beginning to miss the twat. Is there nothing on the fucking telly?

IceNoSlice Sun 18-Aug-13 19:35:13

No, there is nothing on the telly. I've resorted to Celebrity Masterchef on iplayer.

If you're determined that you want out, all you can do now is get the best deal for yourself that you can, regarding money, possessions etc. You know how best to handle him. And avoiding stress for you and your baby is probably the best course of action, eh? As Mortified said, can you ask him to leave?

commsgirl Sun 18-Aug-13 19:40:34

Pram I'd be asking him to leave not letting him hide in the spare room if I were you! In terms of talking vs not - it depends whether you feel like you're going to gain anything from it other than heartache/extra stress.

commsgirl Sun 18-Aug-13 19:41:58

Oops - posted too soon! You sound like you've already worked out your next course of action so just try and stay as strong as you are being. We're all thinking of you flowers

I think is have to talk to him Prammy. If I didn't, I'd always regret it. But that's a totally personal perspective. You have to do what you feel is right x

I'm now fixated on these funny sensations in my bikini line. I don't know why. My tummy has also really popped out today. I'm also constipated which I'm sure isn't helping. I'm cooking an amazing dinner, but I just know I won't be able to eat it!

Rockchick1984 Sun 18-Aug-13 19:46:24

Pram is there anything he could say that would make it better? If not then he's probably doing the right thing staying well away for now! Are you ok financially, that is something you need to consider at the moment, speak to the job centre if necessary and see what help you can get (would be Jobseeker's Allowance at the moment I think until baby arrives). Hope you're ok thanks

Thanks, lovelies. i think I will ask him to leave. It's rather like living with a cadaver in the bedroom. he will probably soon begin to have that whiff about him.

I am watching The Mill at 8pm followed by Dangerous Liaisons at 9 on ITV3.

Ice, we have no money (thanks to his deception) and no possessions. The cats are mine smile

HotCrossPun Sun 18-Aug-13 19:49:59

Pramala What a shit situation. If there is nothing he can say/do that will make things right then I think it's best if he stays out of the way.

A confrontation where you tell him exactly how much he has disappointed how and how much of a dick you think he is probably would make you feel better, but your body doesn't need that kind of stress right now.

I'd 2nd asking him to leave. There is nothing more uncomfortable than you both being in the same house when you aren't talking. Or could you go and stay with your mum for a few days?

We are all here for you lovey, virtual friends or not! thanks

Thanks so much, Hottie. I have just approached him as he was putting some insipid TV dinner in the microwave. I asked him if he had any plans to leave and he said yes, next weekend. Does he know where he's going? No; he needs to find somewhere. I asked him why he has yet to show any real remorse and he hung his head and said 'there are no words for the shame I feel. I am so, so ashamed I can't begin to speak to you about it'. He never looked at me. As he was sloping off I said, 'but you felt no shame whatsoever when you were blowing hundreds of pounds a month at the bookies, did you?' sad

My dad loaned us almost £6k for the IVF abroad and DH has only just begun to pay him back at £250 a month over approx. two years. I have just asked him if he intends to keep up the repayments and he said yes, but not this month as he will need to 'throw all my wages at getting a new place. I will pay your dad double next month when I get my bonus'. What a fucking mess. I hope my dad doesn't suffer financially through all this. I've told DH that if he lets my father down in this respect he will not be seeing this baby. I'm not joking, either.

IceNoSlice Sun 18-Aug-13 20:34:42

If he's done what I have suspected for a little while (begins with g) I would find that incredibly hard and I don't think I could forgive it either. Trust is such an important thing. And he's risked/lost your security. So sorry, pram

IceNoSlice Sun 18-Aug-13 20:39:06

Cross post again. So sorry. I hate gambling with a passion. Can't stand casinos (of which there are a lot in Birmingham and they seem a popular work night out option hmm). Hope your dad comes out ok.

Oh, Ice, it's fucking devastating. I'm reeling from the pure deceit. How fucking dare he? I don't care that it's out in the open; I've nothing to be ashamed of. He has led me to believe that we are really skint all the time and so I really don't think it will be a financial disaster to live on my own. We've lived like paupers ever since we met and now I know why. He's also been receiving Working Tax Credits which he never told me about - £208 per month. I can only find bank statements going back to November (we have separate accounts) but he was getting the Credits then. My parents have treated him like a son and have supported us financially right through our relationship because they appreciate how hard he works and how 'poor' we are.

They are devastated that he could do this to me and our baby, our hard won darling baby. Fucker.

It feels like he's been having an affair, because, in reality, he has. It's a fundamental and protracted betrayal.

commsgirl Sun 18-Aug-13 20:53:49

Pram it's such a horrible situation to be in. You focus on giving all your love to that precious little baby you wanted so much.

IceNoSlice Sun 18-Aug-13 20:53:57

That is so shit. You're absolutely right, it's a betrayal as clear as day.

Difficult to see positives. But I guess you have time to get sorted before the baby comes, and it might have been worse to find out with a newborn in your arms. And if your finances were more joint, he could have blown all your money too. Sorry if inappropriate but I have a natural tendency to hunt for silver linings.

Coolhand Sun 18-Aug-13 20:54:37

Pram I'm glad you now know his intentions and that he will be away soon. I'm also glad you have such a good relationship with your parents as I think they will be a critical support in the months ahead.

However, it doesn't take away from the devastation you are feeling right now. It is just shit. Wish we could all be there for you in real life.

Dabarai Sun 18-Aug-13 20:54:45

So sorry Pram, sounds like you are doing a right thing. Get out as soon as you can, sadly it is not worth to stay with him. sad Hope you are getting all support you need. flowers