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October 2013 - Who is the least prepared?

(1000 Posts)
GTbaby Sun 30-Jun-13 11:09:09

just made it in time for last post on old thread... i hope

roxvox Sun 30-Jun-13 11:12:05

Well done GTBaby I didn't realise until after I had posted that it was post number 999! I was just about to race and start a new thread when you did it - thank you!

I meant to say on my last post - thanks to whoever suggested Bavaria beer! And I hope you all have lovely Sundays whatever you get up to smile

Shirehobbit Sun 30-Jun-13 11:22:31

You're so good at keeping us in order, GT grin

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 11:24:11

Hello everyone, we've already walked the dogs for an hour (DS on his bike the whole time) and we have a 2 year old's birthday party this afternoon. Fun times!

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Sun 30-Jun-13 12:00:49

Thanks for the new thread GT - in answer to your question..I think I'm definitely a serious contender...pretty much nothing done in prep for the baby here! Starting to feel a tad guilty.

Pseudo - what sort of dogs do you have? I'm really feeling the strain of daily dog walking now. I'm still out for a couple of hours most days, but I'm probably covering half the ground and sticking to less strenuous routes.

Naughty dog has also picked up on my slowness and is taking advantage big-time.

Just wondering what others think of my DP going overseas with friends for a week (indulging his hobby) when I'm 34 weeks... he can't see why I'm a little narked. I can't help feeling that the money and precious days of annual leave could be put to better use..

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 12:15:16

I have border collies Bridget. On days like today with DS we go to the playing fields, he rides his bike and we go at his pace whilst I kick balls for the dogs and do some training with them. We don't go far really. If we can't get there we do a couple of laps around the block with DS in the buggy and then I take them to the fields later. They have suffered since I've stopped running them at agility quite early (although I still stand there for 2 hours and teach it!) so I like to keep them active if possible.

xuntitledx Sun 30-Jun-13 12:17:23

May I join the Facebook group?

GTbaby Sun 30-Jun-13 12:23:57

Bridget. Would be hella pissed off. DH wanted to go to Canada for a family wedding. I put my foot down and said no. Helped that his mum was on my side. Lol.
Ended up in and out of hospital the 2nd week he would have been away.

I couldn't play the annual leave card as he works shifts. And he gets over time hours back doubled. So he always has spare days off. Or the money card as he only had to pay for flight as stay with family. So I played the hormonal preg women card. I'm scared of being alone and something happening. Lol

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 12:26:21

Bridget, I can see why you are a tad narked. DP is going to Marbella on friday (stag do) then ibiza at the end of july (another stag do) then the other week announced he would like to go to Hong Kong at the beginning of september to visit his friend who works/lives there. I basically told him he was taking the piss. Hong Kong is now off.

The weather was forecast nice here today. I think its cloudy clapham, but the north of england is usually cloudy or raining. That's one thing I do miss about living down south.

Natalieand Sun 30-Jun-13 12:34:35

bridget it would be a no if dh was asking me if he could go abroad at 34 weeks, I no u probly won't have the baby then but sometimes ppl so u never no?

Have taken dd strawberry picking now going home to hav hot dogs and strawberries for lunch :-)

roofio87 Sun 30-Jun-13 12:44:45

I definitely wouldn't like dp going that far so late on. who knows how long it could take for him to get back if u needed him too!!

MrsO27 Sun 30-Jun-13 13:55:08

Dh is going on a stag when I'm 36/37 weeks, but it is in the uk. Not too happy about it but they were possibly going to Germany so glad that's not happening. He's the best man so he can't really say no.

Umlauf Sun 30-Jun-13 14:00:31

Checking in smile thanks for the new thread GT

Hmm bridget 34 weeks is a little late for a whole week... Could he join them for just a weekend maybe? You're unlikely to give birth that early but its not impossible and I would feel quite vulnerable having a whole week alone that late... Are you near your family?

DH has had the opposite extreme, turning down every conference and trip since we got the BFP! He should be in China this weekend (for work though, not sure how strong his resolve would've been for a stag do!)

HotSoupDumpling Sun 30-Jun-13 14:04:01

Thanks GT!

We've had various friends who've had early births. It's not likely, but wouldn't want DP to risk going abroad in September if it's just for a bit of a jolly. I'd be so pissed off with him if he missed the birth!

MrsO27 Sun 30-Jun-13 14:09:58

Isabella Oliver has a sale on for anyone still looking for special occasion dresses and such like www.isabellaoliver.com/maternity-clothes/100/sale.html?viewall=true
Did you get along to the mothercare sale gt?

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 14:45:16

Thanks gt baby! Checking in. Will catch up on the thread later. Now have to take the little hyperactive boy for a walk

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 14:49:05

I found another maternity clothing company. www.seraphine.com they have a few decent pieces and have a sale on aswell.

Bridget I agree with everyone else, would not be best impressed. Your points about annual leave and finances are valid IMO- and although you are v unlikely to for birth that early, you don't know how you will be feeling. I defo wouldn't want to be alone that late on- DP going on school camp tomorrow until Friday and I'm really not looking forward to it despite having parents close by. I might not cook for the whole week and just go to mums after work instead!

GTbaby Sun 30-Jun-13 15:42:19

MrsO got a cream blanket for the bump. A new first outfit for bump and some baby grows for Ds1. And a wooden number jigsaw for ds1 to give him at Xmas. shock First Xmas gift bought. Lol

Back from buggy shopping. Very hot in London today. My feet swelled and the straps of my once comfy flip flops have give me blisters on the bottom and sides of my feet sad just had a lovely salady lunch with some bread from the market which always makes me happy though.

Results of pushchair research if any of you are considering similar ones still:
Icandy peach looked very nice, good quality fabrics and felt very sturdy but had a noisy hood, moving it would wake up a sleeping baby andsounds annying. Very easy to fold up nice and small. Easy to use foot break.
I candy strawberry had cheap looking fabric that looked as though had been washed too many times.
Icandy cherry didn't have adjustable handlebar and DH kicked the back each time he walked. Not good for tall people.
Icandy apple didn't look as swish as the peach but did tick many of the boxes. Apparently there is a new version out. Hood soft so didn't make the clicking noise.
Bugaboo chameleon seat apparently longer than icandy and meant to be slightly better for all terrain but pretty similar to the peach. Hand break very stiff to release. Looked very easy to collapse. Carry cot a bit cheaper looking and chassis felt less study than icandy. Best selling model in the pushchair shop.
Bugaboo bee the baby seemed very low down. In theory can have from birth but I like the carry cot ones better. Suggested wasn't very good on anything other than pavements, eg even grass.
Silver cross surf basket way too small and looked like a shopping trolly.
Silver cross wayfarer cheaper but not as fancy looking, nice sturdy carry cot similar to icandy style. Foot breaks bit fiddly. Better shopping basket. Wheels not as good as more expensive pushchairs and not as good at tight turns. Very easy to collapse but doesn't go very small.

We are deciding between the peach and the chameleon. Bugaboo chameleon seems to be the most recommended one, bit doesn't convert to a double whereas the peach does. Only downside of the peach was the noisy hood. Icandy had a one year warranty and they take it away to repair, bugaboo a two year warranty and they send new parts which sounds better.

Both about the same price and we are very luckily being bought the pushchair as a gift.

Also I agree wouldn't be happy with DH going away. I am even worrying a bit about DHs one day trips to Manchester pr Birmingham with work or Oxford to play hockey!

Wickedgirl Sun 30-Jun-13 16:27:48

When I was looking for buggies, I wanted one that could have a carrycot first as it is really important that new babies sleep flat. It also means that during the day, the baby can be put into the carrycot rather than needing a Moses basket downstairs.

Wickedgirl Sun 30-Jun-13 16:28:29

Obviously as the baby grows, I will then put the pushchair attachment on(facing me)

Iheartcrunchiebars Sun 30-Jun-13 16:35:02

Thanks for the new thread! I think 34 weeks would probably be Ok. Although if you are going to worry I reckon ask him not to as you don't want to be stressed then.

I've got to go away for work at 36 weeks its only for 1 night but that is worrying me a bit.

I hope you're all well. Haven't posted for ages so lovely to catch up x

Sanjifair Sun 30-Jun-13 16:40:12

My DP is going abroad with work about 6 h flight away for a week in early September. I'll be 34 weeks. I have said no to travel after 36 weeks. DS was born at 42 weeks and this pregnancy seems similar in every way, so hopefully it will be ok. A holiday for a hobby would be different, I would be saying a big fat no to that!
I know people with both the bugaboo and the peach, both are good prams, don't think you can go wrong really, OB.

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 17:24:46

I agree with everyone Bridget, would feel exactly the same. You also have another little one to look after and will need help and support so you can put your feet up in the evening. Second pregnancy is much tougher.

My DP cancelled his stag do trip last weekend as I wasn't very well and he would need to be away for 4 nights (massive brownie points for this... I'm sure he will want to cash them at an appropriate moment!) He needs to go to Asia in early / mid September though... for a week. It's a conference in Bali (bastard!) so about 15-16 hours trip including all the transfers. Not happy as we don't have any family here in case something happens but not much I can do about this trip. Thankfully I'm due only on 22nd Oct...

A funny and scary story for us though! My work friend in the US threw a massive party at his home when his wife was 37 weeks. She went into labour the following morning and struggled to wake him up. He was too drunk to call the cab, too drunk to get in the cab, and once they got to the hospital, he just fell asleep on the floor, totally passed out. He was useless and hardly remembers the birth! When she was pregnant with their number 2 he was grounded pretty much for all 9 months!

ananikifo Sun 30-Jun-13 17:25:41

Checking into the new thread!

I feel very unprepared but will feel a bit better this month. I've bought some more clothes and will order the nappies this month. DH's aunt and uncle have offered us a cot which we will definitely accept and a carseat which we are considering. Because it's coming from family I think it's more trustworthy than a random used carseat on eBay. We'll have to drive a few hours to pick them up but we can pretend it's a holiday. smile Then it's just a chest of drawers and bedding/mattress once we're in the new house, and cheaper things like muslins and a few more clothes and I think we'll be set for the newborn stage at least.

Can I ask about bibs? Newborns use bibs, right? Is it more for dribbling or for during feeds? Are those triangle-shaped dribble bibs good for newborns/young babies or should I get the traditional kind of bib?

My sister used the triangle shaped bandana bibs for newborn Ana and my niece seemed to wear them all the time as she was very dribbly. They look a little bit like a cowboy outfit but perhaps better than traditional shaped bib? I am to that keen on either but saves changing the whole outfit if they dribble/sick on it.

Car seats are a problem if they have been in an accident but you can trust family. I have also been told that if they were used for a bigger child they will have compressed the foam so it won't be as safe for a little baby. Might be worth researching the as only one person told me this. And they were told by carseat salesman who obviously has an interest in making you not choose secondhand...

legallyblond Sun 30-Jun-13 17:53:57

Checking in!

cazboldy Sun 30-Jun-13 18:26:53

27 degrees here this afternoon - and i have been so lazy! don't feel like eating either....

cazboldy Sun 30-Jun-13 18:30:58

unless you have a sicky baby i never used bibs til they were weaning. Muslins are invaluable for wiping up. And comfort blankets when they are bigger....... and very easy to have multiples of so you can wash them!

My niece is allergic to cows milk and so was very sticky as my sister was eating it and it went through her breast milk. Refluxy sticky dribbly little thing. Good to know not all babies are so messy Caz!

I've had a stressful day out school uniform shopping. We're only 3 days Into the school holidays but I wanted it done early as I'm already getting sore walking around. I just hope there are no massive growth spurts before they start back at school in August.

Sorry it wasn't as fun as you hoped MoN. Did you get everything?

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 18:42:12

same as caz, didn't use any bibs until weaning, just muslins for wiping and you could stick them under their chin when feeding if needed. Also, DS didn't dribble until he started teething. And then went on dribbling until he was three!

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 18:53:46

We never used bibs, DS was very sicky and I had about 20 muslins grin

JellyCurls Sun 30-Jun-13 19:01:26

MoN I did mine over Internet last year as dd despises shopping and noise and lights in shops sends her into full blown meltdown so think we will do that again this year, need to get organised. Also holiday to Spain in 3 weeks do need to try get stuff for that, MIL loves shopping so planning on sending her with some pennies.

Day 2 of toilet training and all is not well. DS has stopped marking his territory by peeing everywhere but has taken to making pee puddles and jumping in them.

confused jelly!

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 19:10:12

oh dear jelly... how old is he? do you think he may be too young? I first tried to potty trained DS when he was just over 2 as in Europe they tend to do it earlier, but it was a disaster as constant stress for 2 wee and poo filled months... he just wasn't bothered and wasn't getting it. I then have up and tried again when he was 2 and 10 months. A totally different story and we were done in 2-3 weeks. With hardly any accidents afterwards. He just wasn't ready when I tried it first time.

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 19:12:24

oh sorry for all my typos... cooking and chatting on phone at the same time! hope it made sense.

jelly they also told me at the nursery that boys tend to get it much later than girls, in case you are comparing him to your DD

pinkbuttons Sun 30-Jun-13 19:18:04

checking in on new thread thanks GTbaby
oh jelly that sounds like hard work. I was very lucky with DS and he decided to potty train himself just as got my BFP but has gone backwards since we moved and has wet himsepf most nights confused Hope the joys of pee puddles wear off soon.

Another one here who just used muslins until DS was teething then we used the little cowboy bibs. He was a very sicky baby but just used to have lots of muslins on the go.

Slippysnow Sun 30-Jun-13 19:26:52

Thanks for asking about the bibs, that was one of my many questions that needed answering smile

Almost everything. I still ended up ordering a couple of things online when we got home. It's a good job I took them emwith me as 10 yr old dd ended up needing skirts in age 14-15. She does have a bit of a tummy but doesn't look that big compared to her friends.
I struggled finding her a jacket. Size 12 fitted best but the arms were way to long so I've ordered a generous looking age 13-14 from M&S as the school shirts in that size fitted.

It was Dp who made the trip stressful as he can't handle being out with all the kids at the same time and his bad mood put me in a mood.

JellyCurls Sun 30-Jun-13 19:28:51

DD has SN so toilet trained at 4.5 before starting school and still has many accidents. DS is 2.5yrs and has been telling me for past week when he has a wet nappy so think we just at a battle of wills. Why sit on toilet and pee when you can through stuff down the loo toilet roll, sisters trainer, a book and why make pee vanish down loo when you can make puddles and splash in it. Knows he is doing it as conveniently pulled his pants to the side so they wouldn't get wet.

JellyCurls Sun 30-Jun-13 19:29:12

Oh I so wish I could have a beer tonight!

I've been fantasizing about a Morgan's and coke all day. My best friend is under strict instructions to smuggle either that or a bottle of Jack Daniels onto the ward after the birth.
I suppose that will be the last thing on my mind come the time though.

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 19:36:28

DP and I can't shop together for clothes either MoN. Correction I can shop with him and sit outside the changing rooms patiently he on the other hand is an impatient misery guts when it's shopping for me. So we agree now to do it seperately.

In bed feeling very sick at the moment.

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 19:38:40

haha - boys will be boys! sounds like he knows exactly what he is doing jelly! mine never complained about wet nappy so I had to force it - he was perfectly happy sitting forever in whatever he did.

I'm so impressed with how organised you are MoN. I'm so happy DS's school doesn't do uniforms. Otherwise, I'm sure I would be one of those stressed mums buying everything the week before the school starts!

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 19:40:44

oh no... sorry you are feeling sick flyer. what exactly is it? flu like or pregnancy like? get better! X

and our DPs are definitely twins...

It was him who insisted on coming so I don't know why he was in such a huff.
Sorry you're feeling ill Flyer. A few people I know have had a stomach bug lately so I'll be staying out of their way. It's the last thing I need right now.

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 19:52:39

It's like the nausea you experience in the first 12 weeks, yuk! I have my slave here (DP) and milking my illness fully :-)

Shirehobbit Sun 30-Jun-13 20:04:56

Hope you feel better soon flyer.

Tonight's random pregnancy joy? I have a really, really sore belly button confused I guess it's getting ready to pop out? sad

Natalieand Sun 30-Jun-13 20:23:25

Dd was bottle fed and I mainly used Muslins till she was weaning, I'm not keen on the look of the cowboy style bibs at all!

So ever since. I started feeling baby movements I have felt them every single day and I have to say I can't say I've felt baby move at all today, so just about to have a cold glass of lemonade sugar coated strawberries and a chocolate bar in a bid to provoke some movements!!

You could just be cruel and do what I do and give baby a poke.

Natalieand Sun 30-Jun-13 20:36:28

I saw someone on a local Facebook selling site selling a so sonoline b Doppler yesterday now I'm desperately trying to find it to go and buy it as I could really do without going too the hospital to check for a heart beat

I read (on here?) that you commonly stop feeling baby as much around this time.
I hope your naughty little bean reassures you soon though Natalie.

MrsO27 Sun 30-Jun-13 20:39:06

Thanks also on the bib advice! Will stock up on muslins for now. Can I throw another item up for discussion, baby monitors... Do you need one straight away if they're sleeping in your room? Thought it might be handy when in the shower etc. And if they are needed, which features are essential? Seen ones with video, movement sensors etc. But is that necessary?

Natalieand Sun 30-Jun-13 20:41:16

He's usually most active in the evening so I hope he starts moving any minute now.

We had a video monitor for dd and I found it invaluable when I first started putting her too bed at a bedtime and not in our room as it meant I could watch her and could even see her chest rising and falling on it etc. deffo recommend a video one xx

I'm thinking about getting a sensor pad for Eliana's cot. I've heard that they can go off pretty randomly and be a bit annoying but I don't know if we can afford not to have one when she has a lung/heart condition.

Hope you feel some movement soon Natalie

cazboldy Sun 30-Jun-13 21:02:33

we borrowed one of those sensor pad things off a friend MoN as a friend of mine lost her LO to sids when i was pg with number 3 sad and made me very paranoid. It was completely unexplained sad

scared the life out of us numerous times once he got big enough to wriggle off it, but very reassuring at the start.

cazboldy Sun 30-Jun-13 21:03:14

Natalie hope you feel him move soon. I poke ours too MoN grin

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 21:07:39

We have a sensor pad as DS would only sleep in his front, we only had about one false alarm. Amazing thing.

roxvox Sun 30-Jun-13 21:16:36

I've bought the Angelcare AC401 movement & sound monitor. I read some good reviews about it, and preferred the idea of it over a video one (not sure why). I bought it brand new and boxed off of a really lovely lady on eBay (we started messaging each other afterwards about babies) for £52 inc postage, which I thought was a bargain too.

Any movements yet natalieand? I didn't feel any movements this morning when I usually do, but baby has been wriggling around again this evening.

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 21:20:11

Nat a few days ago I hardly felt any movements was really quiet for a day. I hope you feel something soon as I know how worrying it can be.

JellyCurls Sun 30-Jun-13 21:24:35

We have a digital monitor with no movement or apnea monitor but its clear enough to hear dc snoring and breathing. Dd has bad sleep apnea so her apnea mat in special care was going off constantly, we were never told to get one so we didn't had enough to worry about back then if I was buying a new one I would prob pay extra for a movement mat.

JellyCurls Sun 30-Jun-13 21:25:10

Hope baby starts kicking soon natalie

Natalieand Sun 30-Jun-13 21:34:34

Still no movements and the lady who had the Doppler for sale has already sold it. Not really in a position to be going over to the hospital now I've had strawberries and sugar and chocolate bar a Capri sun and a glass of lemonade I feel fit to burst lol. If I haven't felt anything by the morning I will call midwife and see if she can see me in a clinic or come go my
House to hear a heart beat if not ill have to go to day assessment unit and wait for hours.
I forgot how stressful this was not feeling
Movements.
I remember with dd I ended up in day assessment about 3x in one week but even the ctg monitor wasn't picking up movements but could detect a heart beat so they done a scan and she was fast asleep no matter how much they poked and prodded her lol

Thanks for the support ladies, what else can I eat tools
Him budge?

Natalieand Sun 30-Jun-13 21:35:43

i eat to make him budge damn auto correct

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 21:37:30

Honestly Nat I would just call maternity triage rather than possibly wait too long. Hope that doesn't sound harsh xx

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 21:37:39

both my DS and this one react strongly to anything very sharp, with vinegar, lime etc... if you want to try it on yours?

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 21:38:29

The Angelcare is the one I have roxvox.

JellyCurls Sun 30-Jun-13 21:39:14

What about going for a hot bath? That's how I got dd and ds to move food and drink never worked for me

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Sun 30-Jun-13 21:39:36

Thanks ladies - good to get some other people's views. The trip is definitely going ahead (flights etc all booked) and tbh I never really have any power of veto over DP's expeditions. It's just reassuring to know I'm not unreasonable to feel a bit miffed about it. DP just can't understand or chooses not to understand why I'm disgruntled.

I'll probably head to my parents whilst he's away, but not overly keen on trekking miles up North on the train with DD at that stage in my pregnancy either. Think I'll miss my own bed!

It's all my own fault for pairing up with someone that lives for their hobby. His passion was very attractive when we first met but isn't very compatible with family life.

Flyer sorry to hear you're feeling sick. My 'morning' sickness (except I get it in the evening) has returned over the last fortnight. I think this time it is more heartburn/squished innards related, rather than hormonal like the first 16 weeks.

MoN very impressed you are sorting out uniforms for next term already. I need to take a leaf out of your book. I'm always frantically sewing on name tapes the night before.

Natalie - hope the cold drink and sugar has done the trick and you are feeling movements again x

Bridget I can't see myself ever sewing name tags in. Biro or iron on labels perhaps.

I'm not normally this organised but I knew I had to get Desperate Dan's (I can't stop calling him that now) wages off him before they disappeared, plus knew I really wouldn't want to be traipsing around the shops when I'm bigger.

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Sun 30-Jun-13 21:49:54

Sorry Natalie crossed posts a bit there - bit of a personal suggestion but could you try having a relaxing bath with a touch of 'self-pleasuring' thrown in? Don't know if it's the extra blood flow to the area and womb contractions but it always seems to get this baby on the move blush

Agree with Pseudo though, if you are really worried, best to get some proper reassurance.

Natalieand Sun 30-Jun-13 21:57:15

Just laid on the sofa and poked my belly all over the place and jiggled my belly and have felt a few small kicks think ill give my midwife a txt in the morning as baby has been quiet all weekend and see if she can either come to mine like she usually would or if I can go to one of her clinics just for her to check the heart rate but its re assuring to have felt a few kicks. He only respond to me bullying him tho he isn't volunteering any kicks x

That's good Natalie maybe he's just having a lazy day.

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Sun 30-Jun-13 22:04:25

So glad you've felt a few movements but the text to the midwife sounds a good plan too.

Have you had a very physically busy weekend (with all the strawberry picking)? I tend to find this baby is quieter the busier I am. I never ever feel the slightest kick or twinge when I'm out walking.

GTbaby Sun 30-Jun-13 22:05:44

Bibs - used muslins for feeding. Then bandana style for drooling. Bibs for weaning. But have now moved to a plastic bib as food stains don't come out of bibs.

Monitor- I got angel care movement and sound. Used mat while lo was in my room. Sound never worked so had to return it. Then got TT one for £30! I preferred angel care. But we only use it for sound now so it's ok.
You can adjust the sensitivity of the mat.

Off to get ready for my first day back after mat leave!

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 22:09:02

Can you text the midwife tonight Nat? I don't want to continue on a downer but some Count The Kicks thread on here have questioned 'reactive' movements as an indicator that all is well. Sorry to go on about it...

PseudoBadger Sun 30-Jun-13 22:09:41

It's important to trust your instincts though, so if you are happy to wait then tell me to bugger off grin

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Sun 30-Jun-13 22:10:50

Oh, does anyone happen to have any experience of the NCT bednest - bedside crib thing?

Thinking of getting one but trying to weigh up whether the 6 month rental is the better option?

Checking in decorated the hall today so away to bed exhausted will catch up tomorrow. 27 Weeks today smile

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 22:19:11

Bridget and the self pleasuring I laughed out loud at that... Now we all know what you get upto in the bath, hehe :-)

I sympathise with the hobbies Bridget, my last long term relationship he was mad for kite surfing, I never saw him and he was always going away somewhere. My DP now is a bit of a workaholic although I can't complain because he is very good to me really. What hobby does your DP do?

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 22:21:45

Glad to hear you've felt a little movement Nat x

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 22:31:22

I usually prefer shower to bath and have baths very rarely. But now I've realised that I was just doing it all wrong!! he he

hope you feel better flyer and glad you are feeling movements Natalie

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 22:55:28

Less that 100 posts in and we've already managed to lower the tone haha!

MrsO27 Sun 30-Jun-13 23:10:42

Glad you've had some movement natalie. I've had a couple of days this week with less movement but I read somewhere they're sleeping a lot more now so have put it down to that. Would contact your mw though just to be on safe side.
Thanks for the baby monitor advice. Will have a look at the angel care one. Just worried that a monitor will make me worry more!

claphammama Sun 30-Jun-13 23:46:05

haha need to have some fun!

first day back in the office tomorrow after a week off... mixed feelings. will need to count my remaining days again to keep going!

Flyer747 Sun 30-Jun-13 23:51:12

Good Luck tomorrow clapham. Just think a few more weeks and you'll be on a beach in Greece relaxing then not long left after that smile

Slippysnow Mon 01-Jul-13 06:57:38

I saw that an Angel care monitor was on sale in Argos the other day, maybe worth checking out.

natalie one of my pregnancy apps the other day said that the baby's heart beat can be heard with a stephoscope this week. I was quite surprised (hope it wasn't wrong) so you might not need to spend money on dopplers. However, I did see one on Argos for £16. No I'm not an Argos sales person ;)

claphammama Mon 01-Jul-13 07:36:10

thanks for reminding me flyer :-) hope you are feeling better today and enjoy your days off!

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 10:29:49

So I texted the midwife this morning and explained I've felt either none or very little movement this weekend and isit too early to be kick counting (25 weeks today) and she text back and said have a cold sweet drink and a lay down and see what happens but they generally say not to kick count until 28 weeks but I should be feeling a generous amount of kicks on a daily basis still and if I haven't felt anything by 11am this morning she would get a colleague out to my house to check for a heart beat as she is off today then about ten minutes later she texted me again to say she's passed my number on to another midwife to come and see me today to make sure everything is ok so currently on sofa with a chocolate bar and full fat coke willing the baby to beat me up lol.

Wickedgirl Mon 01-Jul-13 10:42:09

I hope you start getting lots of wiggles soon

roofio87 Mon 01-Jul-13 10:58:30

Natalie very glad you have a very helpful and proactive mw! better safe than sorry. hope he starts moving soon.
I read this week that if your partner puts his head on ur stomach he might be able to hear the hb!?!? I can't quite believe that one my stomach is so noisy I don't think he'd be able to hear past that!lol

notsoold Mon 01-Jul-13 11:00:04

Natalie....is lo kicking yet????
Xx

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 11:01:09

Nope nothing yet. I'm getting panicky to be honest and I haven't heard from the stand in midwife yet to arrange a time to see me so I've just text my proper midwife again

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 11:20:09

Going to clinic to be seen at 1.30 xxx

PseudoBadger Mon 01-Jul-13 11:21:10

Can you not just call the hospital triage/labour ward? I'm sorry you're still worried sad

Go to triage nat thats what o did and they arranged a scan xx

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 11:46:01

I don't think we have a triage, we have our midwives then if necessary they send u to day assessment unit which is where they put u on a monitor and of necessary do a scan so if the midwife thinks necessary when I see her at 1.30 she will send me over there straight away

roofio87 Mon 01-Jul-13 12:24:42

hope it all goes well with the mw natalie!

I am not feeling good today. its my mum's 60th birthday this week and we're all going away for the weekend and I've been stressing about the money for it all day. my sister's have organised presents, food etc for the weekend and really havent spent a lot at all, but its still a huge chunk of my monthly budget gone. at the moment mine and dp's finances are seperte and i'm really sturggleing with the idea of expecting him to let me spend his money that he works so hard for (he earns a lot more than me). i've always been so independant, but betwen not working much at the moment and expecting lo i hardly have any money. i feel rubbish about it. I also know i'm way over reacting over it, as i have got myself so so upset over it, to the point where I feel like dp and the baby will be no better off with me around, they would cope great on their own, I just don't feel like i'm going to be bringing anything else the baby needs. I know its silly, but thats honeslty how i feel. I'll obviouly talk to dp about all this when I he gets home later, i just feel guilty and rubbish about the whole thing.
Thanks ladies, i really needed to get that off my chest. didn't mean to get all doom and gloom on you!!

pinkbuttons Mon 01-Jul-13 12:57:38

hope all is well at the mw natalie
roofio dont feel bad about being able to let feelings out on here. Sorry dont have any helpful advise but sounds like you know that you and baby will depend on your partner more especially if he earns more than you. Definitely think you should speak to him tonight so he knows. I had the same wobble last week as am no longer working until baby arrives.
we have set up a standing order to my account has made me feel alot better now I dont have to physically ask for money. hope dp can make you feel better x

claphammama Mon 01-Jul-13 13:08:05

Just checking in during lunchbreak and found this post roofio!
Don't even say they would be better off without you! You will give this baby everything he / she will need. Babies don't need material things and don't need high-achieving mums - but they need a lot of love, understanding and attention. Noone will be able to give it better than you. When I was small I grew up with very very little and was not worse off for it - quite the contrary, it made me more driven and made my childhood full of the things that matter, instead of toys and dresses my parents couldn't afford. It's really not about money at all. Money helps in everyday life, no denying this, but it's also so true that the most important things can never be bought.

And as to relying on your partner financially and giving up your independence, I will be doing the same soon and I know a few others on this thread will too. Partners contribute to relationships and families in many different ways. And most can't be and shouldn't be measured in terms of money. You are not milking it or taking advantage. And relationships are very rarely equal on all levels - there is usually someone who earns more, someone who contributes more with their time, someone who gives more emotionally etc... so look at everything, the full picture, and please let him pay for things if money is causing you so much stress. You are a family now, not just two people dating. Things have changed. And trust me, you never know how life will go - the tables can turn at some point like they did for me and you may end up in reversed roles one day.

I really hope this is a one off and you don't feel like this very often? xxx

notsoold Mon 01-Jul-13 13:15:51

Natalie....((hugs))

Good luck Natalie let us know how you get on.

Roofio I'm sorry you're feeling like this, I think Clapham is spot on. My memories of being a child don't involve expensive things, they are all about the time I spent with my family. The contribution you make to your baby's life is no less than your DP- it's different but definitely not less. I understand how difficult it must be to feel reliant on someone if you're not used to it, but you're a family and so you all rely on each other for different things. I hope you feel much better after speaking to him, and you can put your wobble down to pesky hormones. In any case, feel free to vent here flowers

PseudoBadger Mon 01-Jul-13 13:33:13

Thinking of Natalie and Roofio today xx

roofio87 Mon 01-Jul-13 13:37:21

thanks so much ladies. I know its probably mostly hormones. I know they wouldn't be better off without me, but much the same. dp is so amazing and will be an amazing dad, I just feel like he'll provide baby with everything he'll ever need, financially and emotionally, I just don't feel like I'll bring much extra to the mix. I'm being silly, I'm just a bit of a mess today!!

cazboldy Mon 01-Jul-13 13:37:33

Hope all is well Natalie (sure it will be!) xx

roofio i earn very little atm...... but without me doing what i do dh couldn't work the hours he works! Childcare for more than 2 dc seems ridiculous if you are not on a v. high wage, hence me not doing more than i do.

He gets paid into his account. I leave enough in there to cover his mobile phone payments, and car insurance and then I take the rest!!!

I sort all household stuff, bills etc.

If he needs any cash he asks for it! not much need for it in a farmyard though grin

May sound v.unfair to some, but it works for us, and we share everything - aways have done.

When you have a baby lots of things change - this is just one of them xx

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Mon 01-Jul-13 13:43:11

Thinking of you Natalie - not long until the clinic now x

Flyer - <hushed whispers for fear of outing herself> DP is a true caving obsessive (it's like a third person in our relationship) and it doesn't help that he's a workaholic too. Honestly, he's fantastic when he's around, unfortunately it's just not as much as DD and I would like.

Roofio - I'm sorry to hear you are feeling so down and I would echo everything clapham has said (very wise words)

I have been a SAHM since I went on maternity leave at the end of October 2006 and one of the hardest things to adjust to was the financial dependence on DP. I won't lie, even now there are still odd moments when I feel like I'm the 'free-rider' in the relationship or guilty for not contributing in a monetary sense.

However, the vast majority of the time, it isn't an issue. We are a family and DP and I are contributing in different - but equally important - ways. I suspect how you are feeling is completely normal and just part of the transition from a couple to a new family unit.

Being pregnant, and when your baby first arrives, can be a rather scary time with previous roles, identities and relationship dynamics changing dramatically...I think the odd 'wobble' and down day is pretty much inevitable..

I second what caz says I earn nothing obviously all the tax credits come to me but i don't earn anything but i don't see me as anything but as important as DH without me being a mummy he would find it hard to work the hours he does and we share every penny and he loves as do I to know that i'm always there for the kids no need for childcare and i'm always home for him coming home we are not passing ships in the night so to speak, chin up roofio xxx

hope all is well nat xxx

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Mon 01-Jul-13 13:56:59

Roofio - long-term I'm sure you'll come up with a system that works for you and your DP. In our household DP pays all the main bills (mortgage, utilities etc) from his account and then a small-ish standing order goes into my current account each month.

Any large ticket items for the house, DD, the dog or myself, I slap on the credit card, which DP then pays at the end of the month.

My mum thinks it's shocking that we don't have a joint account, but we've never felt the need to set one up.

MrsO27 Mon 01-Jul-13 14:04:18

Hope everything's ok natalie and roofio, all babies need their mummies so you will very much be needed! flowers

Bridget Dp out a lot? Is that why you've taken to "self pleasuring" in the bath?

Hope all is well Natalie and baby is just being lazy.

Roofio At the grand old age of 32 I have never worked apart from in the voluntary sector. I'm completely reliant on Dp but I do all the things he won't do with them like make cakes, arts and crafts, and read stories and because I'm home all day I'm less stressed and more easy going than he is so the dc's feel they can talk to me about their worries. I'm sure you've got loads to offer.

roxvox Mon 01-Jul-13 14:22:09

Hope all is going well natalie!

roofio I know how you feel. When DH and I first moved in together (back when he was DBoyfriend), I didn't have a job or any money and it took me a couple of months to find work, so I had to keep asking DB for money all of the time. I remember one day when he was away when I didn't eat or do anything because we had no food in the house and I didn't have any money to buy any!

Now that I've got a job we each put in enough money to our joint account to pay for the bills and the food etc. DH puts in more than me each month as he earns more, and then as a result we end up with the same amount of disposable income each. We'll obviously have to rethink this once baby is here and I am earning naff all!

claphammama Mon 01-Jul-13 15:11:14

This sounds really fair roxvox and I love your style caz :-)

Hope natalie will be back soon with good news!

On a totally unrelated note, Backstreet Boys are in the office today. Just went to look them up with the girls. As a geriatric mum remembering their hay days, I find it vaguely exciting. However, I can exclusively reveal that they are much shorter in real life than I thought they would be and they've aged as much as everyone else.

Lol thanks for the insider knowledge on backstreet boys clapham loved them when i was a kid smile

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 15:42:25

All is well in the baby department. Heart rate was 150bpm and she felt the top of my uterus all though she didn't measure it she said it felt perfect for 25 weeks and that if he still isn't active over the next few days then to contact them again so I can go to day assessment for a trace to be done just to make doubley sure again. Phew what a relief x thanks for the support ladies (he still hasn't moved though the little pest)

Glad all is well nat have a nap or try too usually wakes this one up grin

Wickedgirl Mon 01-Jul-13 15:56:11

That's fab news natalie

Roofio....... You are growing a whole new life! That has way more value in a relationship than any monetary value. In my marriage, there have been times when DH was the main earner and there have been times when I have been the main earner. As long as you both contribute something (emotional, physical, money, support, love etc), it doesn't need to be in equal amounts

Smitten1981 Mon 01-Jul-13 16:00:46

Hi all, I'm back from holiday. Quite happy to be getting back into a normal routine.

I'm having a bit of a freak out though, it might be the hormones, but I'm suddenly totally overwhelmed by all the stuff that I have to find space for.

We did the nursery all nice, painted it white, I took the day off to clean it and chuck everything I didn't want clogging up space out which was fab. But now It's full to the brim with baby crap. The buggy and carrycot is in there with the rocking chair and foot stall. There's hardly any floor space left.

The massive chest of drawers (it's got four HUGE drawers and four square ones at the top) is literally full to the brim with clothes that are probably only going to fit for a few weeks, nappies and wipes.

Now we're looking at moses baskets, which means more crap to have for a few weeks and then find somewhere to stash away. God knows where I'm going to put the cot.

I just want to sit in the middle of it all and cry (sorry to be dramatic). What the hell am I meant to do with all this stuff that is only going to be used for the first few weeks until it's all been outgrown? Why is it all so expensive and bloody huge and bulky so I can't stash it away neatly anywhere.

I've also been looking at reusable nappies as I think they are a good idea, but I've been totally put off by the amount of brands to choose from and they all seem to have different pros and cons. I can't keep buying so much stuff constantly. I'm seriously running out of space and it's driving me insane.

It all seems so wasteful.

Am I being a crazy lady? I just can't cope with it all at the moment.

Shirehobbit Mon 01-Jul-13 16:00:56

Good news Natalie - I'm finding mine is becoming noise sensitive, too; first the surround sound of the cinema set them off in to acrobatics, and today hundreds of screaming children at sports day had the same effect. So put on a favourite album and crank up the volume? wink

Roofio - different but same issue here; for the last six-seven years, I've been the main earner, supporting DH through multiple redundances and returning to college to retrain. In many ways it's really nice that our positions are soon to be reversed, and he's really keen "to pay back" my faith and money. But I'd be lying if I didn't say I was very apprehensive, both about becoming dependent on him but also about whether his wage will be sufficient, because then he may feel he's failed in some way (not from me, but he has set his heart on making it work, ifyswim).

That's great news Natalie.

Great news Natalie smile

Roxvox your arrangement sounds strangely like me and DP!

Hope you feel better about it all soon Shire my current worry is how I fit a cot and Moses basket into our bedroom. Think the Moses basket may have to live in the cot confused

Soupqueen Mon 01-Jul-13 17:22:43

Good newsnatalie

smitten, have you tried the nappy lady? You fill in a questionnaire on the website and she'll give you detailed, personalised recommendations. I was really impressed

www.thenappylady.co.uk/

We have no nursery, stressing about how to fit all the "stuff" into our small space, might need to get rid of everything we own!

roxvox Mon 01-Jul-13 17:24:22

That's fantastic news natalie, glad you can relax a bit now (which in itself might spark your baby into some acrobatics!)

re Household funds clapham and Feminist - it works well for us! At first I felt guilty that DH pays more than me into the joint account, but he just kept saying how we are one and we should have the same amount to spend freely each month etc. Bless him. He might regret those comments when I am on statutory maternity pay!

cazboldy Mon 01-Jul-13 17:36:24

glad it was all ok Natalie smile

Feminist putting the moses basket in the cot is a good idea, as baby will be used to the cot for when you need to move him/her over into it when they are bigger smile

PseudoBadger Mon 01-Jul-13 17:41:47

I'm very pleased Natalie x

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Mon 01-Jul-13 17:48:46

Glad all is well Natalie - I hope you get some more reassuring kicks and squirms from your boy asap. Perhaps he is having a bit of a growth spurt and is conserving his energy?

MoN - you are not far off the mark! It's a miracle our baby was ever conceived given the hours DP was working back in January.

Smitten1981 Mon 01-Jul-13 17:58:23

Ooh thanks Soupqueen. Will fill the form out right away!

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Mon 01-Jul-13 18:01:36

Oh my goodness Clapham I'm so, so, so, jealous! So the Backstreet Boys are back, alright!! <sorry, couldn't resist> Please tell that Kevin was absolutely gorgeous in the flesh.

I'm going to have to dust off my Black & Blue album this evening as I've now got 'shape of my heart' going round and round in my head. Aaaah, happy days...

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 18:05:14

Finances in this house we have a joint acct that dh wages and our tax credits and child benefit go into we take out the amount we need to cover our rent and bills and out it into my bank acct where the direct debits are then whatever is left is what we have for treats and we both have a card to that bank acct so use whatever money we want from it and it works for us as I'm a stay at home mum, and if I wasn't a stay at home mum then dh wouldn't be able to earn the money he does so technically that's my job and the way I look at it is if he isn't happy with that arrangement then he can go to work part time and I will work part time to make up one full time job but tbh I think it would drive him insane being a stay at home dad

Still no movements from baby. His heart beat was quite low down compared to where its usually found and I have a anterior high placenta so I'm thinking he is possibly head down ATM and his arms and legs must be kicking into the placenta so reassuring to no he's still alive in there though (as morbid as that sounds)

claphammama Mon 01-Jul-13 18:22:56

good news natalie!

bridget I'm afraid I can never tell which is which... is Kevin the dark one with thick eyebrows? If yes, he looked definitely edible!

DP just called to say he has some last minute work dinner to go to so on my own tonight. May have to spend it listening to the "shape of my heart" too. May possibly have a long bath as well... hehe

ComtessedeFrouFrou Mon 01-Jul-13 18:24:22

Hope you feel some more movement soon Natalie.

Orange I spotted that you are still undecided about pushchairs. Have you considered the Uppababy? We went for that one and were really impressed by how sturdy it felt compared to the iCandys and Bugaboos. A little bit less expensive as well.

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 18:29:07

Also to those still buggy hunting we have gone for the babystyle oyster which one of you lovely ladies recommended (excuse my rudeness as I can't remember who) very reasonably priced compared to others has a buggy board specifically for they buggy instead of needing a universal one which dd is in love with, also there's tonnes of different colour packs so u can change your mind if u get bored of the colour for hardly any money. And I got the britax car seat that's compatible with it on offer for £55.

And nope I don't work for babystyle I just love my buggy roll on September 10th when its delivered and I can play lol

Thanks comtesse, I will have a look at that as seen mentioned in reviews before. DHs family buying it so cost not too much of an issue, although obviously don't want to take the p***. The chameleon did seem a bit flimsy which isn't great considering the cost!

Glad you got checked and all is well Natalie. That sounds a reasonable idea that it is hiding its feet behind your placenta. Placentas move up during the pregnancy too (I am hoping mine moves up a lot!) so that makes sense to me.

My baby was super active last night for about an hour to the point it was quite uncomfortable and I couldn't sleep through it. Little monkey. Didn't want to post this morning when you were worried about no moving.

Roofio, I think it is completely normal to have at least a few freak outs over such a huge change in all areas of your life. Me and DH absolutely see ourselves as a team in bringing up this baby and DH is very happy to support us financially, he would rather I didn't go back to work after maternity leave. It is such an important job bringing up children and I think it should be hugely valued. I see regularly at school what can happen when it is done badly and it breaks my heart.

We didn't have a joint account until we got married though, and even now we have our own accounts as well, we both pay enough into joint account for bills and keep what is left. Mine is just enough to buy DH a christmas present and top up my phone. DH keeps a lot more, so we will have to rethink that when I have no income. Though he puts more into savings, which we have used for big things like the kitchen.

Flyer747 Mon 01-Jul-13 19:14:58

Glad to hear you heard a little heartbeat Natalie.

Roofio you mustn't think you are bringing nothing to the table. You are going to be this little boys mummy, that's the most important role in a child's life. I echo what clapham said, some of my best memories were things where money didn't even come into it. Picnics with my grandparents in the 6 weeks holidays, playing post office and sweet shop with my mum, dressing up with my sister in mums high heels. My mum was a sahm and I love my parents both equally, but I've always been much closer to my mum because basically she was the main one who raised me. You'll make an amazing mum I'm sure and mums are the backbones in most households. Don't think that just because you won't be as equal on a financial level it takes away from what you'll give on a emotional/loving level. Look at all the knitting you are doing for your little boy, that's something from the heart it takes real effort and time to do that...I hope you are feeling a little happier this evening. Xx

MrsO27 Mon 01-Jul-13 19:56:23

Fab news natalie. Maybe it means you're going to get a chilled out wee baby smile
smitten Have you got other storage for the buggy and carrycot perhaps?Garage or under stairs cupboard maybe? That would free up some floor space. Vacuum bags are great space savers for clothes which you could then store under a bed until needed, or after they're outgrown. You can also get nappy stackers etc. that you can hang from a coat hook in the nursery and that would free up some drawer space. Ikea is great for storage solutions and ideas and just a look on their website might give you some ideas. Don't worry about it though. You can always pack stuff away into longer term storage or sell/donate items once outgrown/no longer needed.

Natalieand Mon 01-Jul-13 20:27:15

Ooo hello there baby bump! He just done 5 minutes worth of big kicks making my belly move and dh could feel them right at the Top of where my uterus currently ends, what a little devil, he obviously likes spaghetti bolognaise and strawberry milkshake lol

HotSoupDumpling Mon 01-Jul-13 20:31:57

Glad you got reassurance Natalie

Roofio - you've had lots of sensible advice from other bus members. Just wanted to say - you will add so much to this baby's life and your DH's life that is simply not quantifiable in financial terms. It is in fact priceless. You are not a free-loader. (If it helps, imagine how much your DH would have to spend to buy eggs, hire a womb, hire a baby sitter, and pay for all the other things you will be doing on mat leave!).

Smitten - hope it all seems better when you think that the buggy and carrycot won't be in there when the baby comes! We haven't bought any baby stuff yet, but have been doing a lot of clearing out and been merciless about giving stuff away to charity. Would definitely second MrsO 's advice about vacuum bags, under-bed storage, hooks in nursery, etc. All the bigger clothing doesn't need to be in accessible storage for some time to come!

Umlauf Mon 01-Jul-13 20:44:16

Hey roofio hope you're feeling chirpier now! I have had very tearful days for exactly the same reason as you! Just think of the hormones, you are going to be a fantastic mother and baby will be so lucky to have you. Hugs!!

I have gooood news! We have put a deposit down on new flat! (We had until September 39th before we are forced out of the one that came temporarily with DHs job). Its unfurnished though and we have NO furniture at all, and the whole place is painted white so its rather clinical, but its modern and clean and safe and baby will have his own room :-) its a huge weight off our shoulders because we can move next month instead of on my due date!!

Also started a new job today, only for 2 weeks temp but it went well. I'm feeling positive!!! :-)

How's everyone else doing today???! Xxx

sad panorama is on to tell me im a terrible mother for taking anti ds

roofio87 Mon 01-Jul-13 20:59:46

oh falcon I took one look at that in the programme guide and avoided at all costs. its just scare mongering. you are absolutely making the right decision for you and your baby by looking after your mental health.

I'm feeling a bit better tonight thanks ladies. I know I'm being daft, I'm just having one of those days!!

Natalie glad ur cheeky lo is.moving lots now!

PseudoBadger Mon 01-Jul-13 21:02:11

Bad heartburn tonight, anyone else?

MrsO27 Mon 01-Jul-13 21:05:45

Congrats umlauf! That's great news.
Rather dull day for me, had the day off and mainly been doing housework with some breaks to watch the tennis. Getting some new blackout blinds fitted in our bedroom and the baby's so they were being measured up today too.
Not looking forward to work tomorrow. Been looking at some emails going back and forth the past few days and they've employed a guy to replace me when I go on mat leave who is getting paid more than me and is getting a relocation package on top of that!! He's going to be a permanent addition to the team due to company growth, but still, I was told he was coming in at a level just below me. Don't know how to handle it but I can't leave it to lie that's for sure.

ananikifo Mon 01-Jul-13 21:09:01

Natalie I'm so glad you've finally felt baby again.

I was the one who posted that a lot of women feel less movement around 24 weeks because amniotic fluid increases. The midwife I saw also emphasised that they still encourage women to contact them at this stage. If you feel there's been a change in the pattern of foetal movements you should still let your midwives know, even though there's probably nothing wrong.

Umlauf I'm really happy for you. You must be do relieved to have somewhere to live.

And roofio I just want to add to the other voices saying we all contribute differently to our families, and contribution of a mother is beyond measure.

I started my new job today which was very exciting! It is also Canada Day, (I'm Canadian and DH is English) and we celebrated by DH leaving me waiting for him in a pub car park for an hour. angry Since moving to this flat we found last minute, I'm very far from transport to work so DH has to drive me to and from a tram stop but we got the timing very wrong tonight.

Yeah really should not have watched it roofio sad thank you your support is invaluble
Genuinely glad your feeling better though smile
Congrats umlauf

JethroTull Mon 01-Jul-13 21:30:35

MrsO I can sympathise with you on the job front. I do a dual role & they've employed 2 people to cover my mat leave smilesmile! I'm trying to let it wash over me & enjoy my last few months at work. What are you going to do?

Congrats Umlauf and Natalie

Realised my last comment was for Smitten not Shire sorry blush

MrsO27 Mon 01-Jul-13 21:49:48

I think I'm just going to have to sit down with my boss and tell him how I feel. The guy employed is completely the right person for the job, but the higher salary? It's a slap in the face. I think I'll question what responsibilities he'll have and if they differ from my own (although i know the answer!) and take the discussion from there. I do work in what is one of the most sexist industries so I'm not massively surprised they're paying a man more, but I thought better of my boss. He's in London tomorrow though so won't get a chance to discuss it until later this week.

Haylebop12 Mon 01-Jul-13 21:49:57

Bloody hell ladies, a new thread and 149 messages, took me some reading all that but I think I'm all caught up now, exhausted!

roofio glad your feeling a little better. Everyone runs their family differently and what some people see as a must in a relationship, others dont. DH and I are completely separate too. A joint account would cause a lot of problems in this house! Its just what works for us. We dont have to justify any spending to each other. (I like spending grin) Things are going to have to alter slightly once I'm on maternity as I wont be able to contribute what I do atm but fortunately my money doesnt drop too significantly as I only work PT anyway.

Umlauf so pleased you got your new flat sorted. Sounds like a massive load off your mind and you can start to relax now into the last trimester.

feminist I second the idea of putting moses basket in the cot. We did this with dd to get her used to her room before we moved her in there and she still had gthe comfort of her familiar bed. Other option is to wait to put the cot up until you need it?

Falcon Please dont let the programme upset you. You absolutely must put your mental health first. Dont know if its similar but my mum was concerned about me taking the anti sickness meds as I took them in my last pregnancy which sadly ended. I told her outright that without them I would probably die from dehydration so I firmly believe its just a risk you absolutely must take. I think theres a thread on here about taking anti d's whilst pregnant.

so pleased you are reassured natalie

Had another manic weekend with MIL here. That plus last weekend Im really feeling it. Also saturday I was really strggling with my back and right hip. It seemed to ''go'' at work and I ended up on a till for last two hours as I could barely walk. I had yesterday and today off but as we had more busy days I've barely rested so only really got tomorrow to do that before I'm back in work. Baby also seems to love beating me up from inside. He has stopped kicking and it feels like he's pushing to get out, very uncomfortable. I feel awful that I should be enjoying feeling him move but as he is on the go constantly I find it irritating and uncomfortable. How terrible does that sound. I didnt enjoy being pregnant with dd either and told myself that I would with this one as we were trying to get pg this time so it's what I wanted. (sorry natalie)

Having an early night tonight. Getting quite grumpy with the lack of sleep, rushing about and with dd also running a temperature on and off since last night a whiny 4yo is not helping!

Sorry for the essay, I think I should keep up better next time!

Haylebop12 Mon 01-Jul-13 21:53:08

MrsO (I knew I missed something I wanted to contribute on) I think you should absolutely sit down with your boss and ask questions. It seems extremely unfair that your replacement should earn more. Are you returning to work? If so, then maybe you should state that you expect that salary when you do! I hope it goes well and you get some answers (and a pay rise!)

Haylebop12 Mon 01-Jul-13 21:55:12

Oh god, that sounded like I didnt want dd, I absolutely did but she was more of a surprise baby then a planned one!

Hooray that your little boy finally gave you some lovely wiggles.
That sounds a bit off MrsO. What do you do?
Falcon you are doing what your doctors advise, that has to be what is best for your situation.
Congrats umlauf you must be very relieved.

Sorry MrsO, i meant a bit off that he should be paid more, not that you are going to speak to him! Cross post!
Are you in a job with a pay scale based on experience? Or is it all your boss' decision?

Hayle sometimes I find it uncomfortable and irritating too when it is constant churning, though most of the time very happy to see and feel evidence my little one is living around nicely in there.

Thanks Hayle and Caz I think I will keep the Moses basket in the cot at night and put it on a stand in the front room during the day. Don't think I could cope with not putting it up until after baby is born, way too excited!

Flyer747 Mon 01-Jul-13 22:23:04

Clapham I used to love the backstreet boys. I was hunting through all my CDs in the car earlier but I must have thrown their greatest hits cd away...favourite song "the shape of my heart" grin

MrsO27 Mon 01-Jul-13 22:29:00

Yep, it sucks, although I'm going to request that I'm paid more now though, not when I come back. Job titles mean nothing at my work but im supposed to be a manager and this guy "an advisor". It just doesn't make sense. He starts next Monday as my boss wanted plenty of time to do a proper handover and get him up to speed. No pay scales unfortunately - that would be too transparent and too much in the spirit of equality! Will keep you all posted. I really hope all the little girls that some of us are carrying don't have to put up with this crap when they're older.

ananikifo Mon 01-Jul-13 22:41:39

MrsO27 you go girl! You are right about everything you said and I hope your company quickly remedies the situation by paying you what you deserve.

And I just bought reusable nappies! I used an ocado voucher to buy a pack of gnappies. It feels a bit silly to buy just a box of nappies but we've done our weekly shop and the nappies are worth enough money.

GTbaby Mon 01-Jul-13 23:43:59

#Quit playing games with my heart shockshock ##I was singing it to ds1 other day. I LOVED BSB!
Going to be singing it all night now

Smitten. Don't panic about space. See my before pic of nursery on FB! Have you thought about where buggy will go on day to day basis? I car boot maybe?
Also we used our buggy carry cot as our Moses basket. Money/space saving tip for you.
Our baby clothes seemed to take over the place until I had a proper sort out.
I boxed up clothes in size order (don't just look at label! I had a 12-18 grow that was was sized wrong and fit him at 6-9!) you can then stack these boxes under the cot?
In each draw now I have boxes. One for baby grows. One for vests, then muslins. Makes it easy for DH to find stuff!

It's taken me months of trial and error to find best way for me. So don't worry.

Also if lo is going to be in your room and you have little storage space. Get a shoe rack from ikea it hands in your cupboard. So you end up with some shelves. I had sections for baby grows. Vests. Cardigans. Muslins. Bed sheets. Blankets and mittens.
I think this is ideal if you have hanging space as baby clothes are fiddly to put away. I'll put images on FB tomorrow. And I'll go find a ikea show rack image online.

GTbaby Mon 01-Jul-13 23:51:03

www.thisnext.com/item/9BE70312/IKEA-Clothes-shoes-organizers

I know I come across really "I did this, and I did that" advice giving type person. But I just feel like I'd always ask ppl (granted in RL) their advice and experience and they were reluctant to give ideas. So now feel like I want to share everything just in case it helps someone.

##before you tear us apart##i should have known from the start###

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 00:00:44

Just been listening to everybody on YouTube, backstreets back alright. Classic tune reminds me of my early 20's smile

moonblues Tue 02-Jul-13 02:22:21

Argggh! Pregnancy insomnia strikes again!

Went to bed at 9.30 because I was so tired and still awake! At least it's given me a chance to catch up on the thread. smile

I haven't bought anything for this baby yet, though I have a car seat, moses basket and cot from my other 2, though I'll need to get new matresses at some point. Could also do with a new pram. I got a Mama & Papas pilko pramette thing which is actually still going strong after 6 years of heavy use, but it starting to look a bit battered. Actually I also have a double 3 wheeler thing, which would be perfectly usable, though the baby is facing away from you. It didn't really matter before when there was a toddler sitting on top and you couldn't really see them anyway, but think I might be able to spend more time looking at this one!

Does anyone have tips about slings? I have a baby bjorn, but was wondering about getting a fabric one.

The baby has been really active tonight and keeps kicking my bladder, which is part of the reason I can't sleep.

Anyway I'll stop rambling to myself...

Hope everyone is sleeping well and enjoying their exciting dreams (you know who you are wink)

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 07:38:53

I've had wakes weeks of sleeping like a well behaved baby and the last few nights I've woken up like 5+x for a wee- rediculous!

I'm a bit like u in that sense haylebop I hated my pregnancy with dd and promised myself id enjoy this pregnancy more which to be fair I haven't moaned as much as last time lol mainly cos I haven't been in as much pain

We need to sort out space too for all our baby stuff ATM it is literally all crammed in a toddler sized wardrobe

Can't remember who was having problems with pay at work but I hope you manage to sort it!

cuillereasoupe Tue 02-Jul-13 07:46:12

You guys are making me feel old - BSB were waaaaay after my time... it was all about Kylie and Jason in my day wink

MrsO good luck with sorting out pay, seems ridiculous if he is being brought in to do the same work (or less) than you. Wonder how your boss could even attempt to justify that. hmm

Been at the hospital for the last hour and a half, had reduced movements since yesterday afternoon and woke up at 5am in a massive panic. Typically baby has kicked more since I've been here than it had in the previous 24hrs. Heartbeat is fine, but I have white blood cells in my urine so they sent it off for tests as it could be a sign of infection. Not sure why I'm still waiting here, heard some screaming ladies down the hall... For once I actually wish I was at work! I'm so glad I came in though, feel much better. Was a bit of a wreck this morning, didn't help that DP is in East Sussex camping. He called at 6 when my alarm usually goes off and I could hardly speak. Oh well, think panic is over now- naughty baby!

pinkbuttons Tue 02-Jul-13 08:27:45

just checking in. so glad naughty babies are both fine natalie and feminist
and mrso thats awful about work. Let us know how you get on.
My DH has had a similar situation at work recently (not in relation to sexism) but he was at risk of being made redundant and had to apply for his own job along with everyone else at risk and someone else has been given it and been offered more money! Wouldnt be so bad if they werent demanding that DH stay in the role until the new person can start in August. Thankfully he has been offered another job but hes really hurt by it and am struggling to know what to say. My only experience of work, is in the NHS and waitressing nothing like the cutthroat world that business and banks seem to be confused

pinkbuttons Tue 02-Jul-13 08:29:02

forgot to say Congratulations to umlauf so glad youve got somewhere sorted to live and are feeling so positive. Now you can look forward to the joys of moving wink

Another rainy day here so looks like a soft play day for me and the youngest. I get so bored sitting there while dd is off playing that I end up just ordering stuff from the cafe and stuffing my face the whole time.

I'm not sure what to do about storage either. Baby will be sharing with youngest dd at some point but her room is quite small. I'm wondering if I can fit a chest of drawers I to the built in wardrobe. The cot bed we've ordered has a drawer underneath but that won't hold much.

Is anyone else experiencing kicks so low that they feel like they're right in the cervix. It's the weirdest feeing.

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 09:08:55

MoN how old is youngest dd? Cos I was considering a mid sleeper type bed for my dd so her chest of drawers etc could go underneath it as opposed to next to her normal bed Etc so that creates more room? Trouble is dd will only be turning 3 and bump is due and I think she's possibly a bit young so I'm gunna hold off until space becomes a major issue x

So glad your feeling re assured feminist its horrible when babies deviate for the usual isn't it! Other than the few kicks I had yesterday evening this baby still isn't really moving but I'm gunna give it a few more days as he's obviously just laying in a position that doesn't allow me to really feel anything x

PseudoBadger Tue 02-Jul-13 09:17:28

"Is anyone else experiencing kicks so low that they feel like they're right in the cervix. It's the weirdest feeing."

Yes I am! Very strange indeed.

My pelvis was sore again last night after teaching dogs so I think I might have to stop soon sad
It wasnt helped by laying/sleeping on ds's floor for 2 hours between 2 and 4 <yawn>
I really liked those 6 nights of sleeping through that he gave us, they seem to be gone now sad

She'll be 5 at the end of October. That does sound like a good idea. They can be quite expensive though. I think I'll have a look and talk Dp into it when he gets home.

MrsO27 Tue 02-Jul-13 09:24:03

Who mentioned kylie and Jason? That's too spooky, was reading yesterday that it would have been Scott and Charlene's silver wedding anniversary this week. WTF! How old does that make u feel now (anyone too young to remember who they are, please keep quiet wink)?
Thanks for the support ladies. Just spoke to my boss on the phone, couldn't discuss specifics with him as am in an open plan office but have said I need to speak to him 'one to one' this week about the new appointment. I think he knows I'm not happy!

JellyCurls Tue 02-Jul-13 09:30:20

MoN we bought dd a cabin bed from ikea. It's blue and wood coloured but we painted the blue bits red and the wood gloss white. Loads of storage space underneath and quite a reasonably priced bef

JellyCurls Tue 02-Jul-13 09:41:07

Reduced movement here too ladies in as much that I don't think I have felt baby move since yesterday morning. Putting it down to stress of toilet training ds yesterday and his joy at making and splashing in pee puddles on my cream carpet. So at work today but am giving it till lunchtime and if I still felt nothing I will call mw. In mean time I am stocking up on goodies to try get bump to wriggle - next stop is hot chocolate seeing as how tea hasn't worked.

Oh and 27 weeks yesterday so in final trimester now, the home stretch smile

Hope you are all well.

Morning all, just checking in quickly. Glad those pesky babies are behaving now!

Great news about the flat umlauf.

Just back from a lovely weekend in the New Forest - DS had a great time. I got the rage at Peppa Pig world though with queue jumping family! Stood in one queue, and a dad is standing there on his own in the queue, looking around and trying to phone his wife. Wife and child turn up ten minutes later, join him in the queue. I presume benefit of the doubt and maybe the child needed the loo. But no, go to the next ride and they are doing the same sodding thing - graa! Had a moan, but they really didn't care, as then sent Dad off to queue at the next one angry.

Anyway, pointless moan over - have a good day everyone!

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 09:55:53

About £130 in argos MoN and also I liked the one hat has a dead straight ladder instead of slanted one so the ladder doesn't stick out into the bedroom and I liked the mid sleeper as its raised but not rediculously high xx

I had a wee look online after I posted and some of the prices aren't ad bad as I thought, especially if I keep the mattress from her existing bed.

She made me cry yesterday. We were in my Gran's house when she found a sticking plaster. She stuck it across my bump saying "That's for the baby's heart".
If only it were that simple.

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 10:01:48

Blimin eck MrsO Scott & Charlene's 25th wedding anniversary. Do you remember the song she walked down the aisle too....angry Anderson 'Suddenly' DP and I went to Melbourne last year and visited Ramsay Street, it looks just like it did in the programme. grin

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 10:02:30

Morning ladies.

Sorry to hear about so many naughty (probably sleeping) babies out there! Mine seems to be super active still, so I am hoping he/she will go through the sleeping phase once they're born!

I found out yesterday that the guy in the office (who doesn't have the same technical ability as me, and has worked here for half the time I have) earns close to what I earn, which has somewhat bugged me. He mentioned yesterday that he is going to ask for a pay rise, which I know he has done a few times in the past, so I guess that's how he's earning so much (I know I am underpaid, I just didn't realise that others weren't!). Very annoying when you've worked hard to learn a specific skill and yet someone who doesn't gets paid similar. There's also a guy in the office (who has also been there for half the time I have), and he spends all day on Facebook and surfing the internet and he's on at least 33% more than me! He obviously does enough to keep the bosses happy though, and I can't blame him for what he earns (he's hardly going to ask for less money). I am not really in a position to ask for a raise now, but DH and I have said that when I look to return to work, that's when I should ask for a raise. Part of me still hopes that I will find my calling whilst on maternity leave and I will be able to run my own business from home! Only time will tell I suppose.

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 10:02:55

Awww bless your little dd MoN that's really sweet.

PseudoBadger Tue 02-Jul-13 10:06:40

I can sympathise re. pay issues sad Our pay banding (local govt) is such that people doing the same role in the same team can earn approx 13k different to each other!!
And when I go on leave they'll get a contractor on several times my hourly rate I imagine.

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Tue 02-Jul-13 10:23:35

Oh MoN - not surprised you got tearful..such an innocent and caring gesture from your DD. The type of thing that makes you want to cuddle them forever and never let go.

Scott and Charlene - what a blast from the past. They always bring back memories of being about 11 and watching a boyfriend and girlfriend in the fifth form lip-sync to "Especially for you" in a school talent contest. I really thought it was the most totally utterly romantic EVER and used to daydream about having a boyfriend that sang it to me blush

Smitten1981 Tue 02-Jul-13 10:25:25

Thanks for the storage top tips. This weekend's plan of action is to buy a million vacuum bags to stop me stressing out.

I was considering using the pram carrycot as a moses basket, but I wasn't sure if you could do that as it says it is suitable for 'occasional overnight sleeping'. Not really too sure why it can't be used as a moses though, I'm sure 'they' try to make you buy duplicates of everything to squeeze as much cash out of you as they can.

Also, this is pretty random. On holiday last week the baby barely moved, I had no indigestion and no leg cramp/ligament stretching pains.

Since day one of being back the baby has been moving like crazy, I've had heartburn every night and leg cramps and ligament pain. I've also acquired my first (massive) stretchmark on the side of my hip. It's so wide, looks like I've got a really nasty burn mark.

What's all that about?

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 10:26:03

OMG - can't believe how much you chatted last night. Pages to catch up on and I don't know where to start!

Glad everything is OK feminist and hope your white cell count means nothing!

yes, frequent kicks in the cervix here - I think I wrote about it about a week ago but referred to it in a much more scientific way ie. "kicks in my hoo hoo". A very strange sensation indeed...

Belated Happy Canada Day ana! Do Canadians do anything special to celebrate or just drink as much as possible, as it's done on other similar occasions all over the world?

Glad your accommodation is sorted umlauf must be such a relief...

And MrsO I also had a similar very negative experience with my first maternity leave. We actually chatted about it a lot on one of the earlier threads and it was amazing to see how many of us felt discriminated / disadvantaged and angry with our employers. It's a really hard and emotional matter and I think you need to decide what you want the outcome to be. Is your main worry your salary and the fact that this guy will be getting paid more for a few months or is your main worry what will happen to your position over time and what kind of situation / expectations you will return to after your leave? I fear that it may be difficult for you to challenge his salary if he has more experience (does he?) and they have another bigger role planned for him in long term? Companies are very clever justifying this type of situations... I went through something very similar. Also, do you want to go back to exactly the same role or could it be an opportunity to change and do something slightly different when you return? I opted for the latter, although begrudgingly, but it actually worked out really well for me... I obviously talk without knowing your company or your situation in detail but worth considering it from many angles, upsetting and unnerving as it may be...

Finally, if you fancy some Tuesday entertainment, this is what is making us laugh in the office today - "30 very british problems"! www.buzzfeed.com/lukelewis/very-british-problems
How many can you relate to? :-)

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 10:30:07

crosspost! this is so sweet MoN... :-)

also forgot to mention - 24 weeks today! And can't believe some of us are already in the third trimester...

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 10:40:56

That's made me really laugh clapham. I'm guilty of 13,16,18 and 27....I love that I'm gonna forward it on to a few people.

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 10:48:08

clapham that was brilliant; I am very concerned as to how many of those were relevant to me!

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 11:02:39

same here - tick most of them. And I'm not even British born but 17 years here have left their mark! We had a big debate in the office about number 6. Also very guilty of 9, 11, 15, 20, 22, 28... and OMG 26!!!

cazboldy Tue 02-Jul-13 11:25:11

Glad All was ok feminist

Yay to your new house umlauf What a relief!

MoN that is quite possibly one of the sweetest things I have ever heard - no wonder it made you cry!

sorry so many of you seem to have work issues - some bosses seem to really take the piss! angry

Off to go and bottle feed a newborn jersey calf that has just surprised us by arriving 8 days early! Little madam smile

roofio87 Tue 02-Jul-13 11:45:03

glad all is ok feminist, I hope there isn't an infection and if there is they can identify and sort it out asap!!
Mon that is so cute, what a good big sister!"

been to have my hair done this morning so that has cheered me up no end!! me and dp were lying in bed for ages last night just watching my tummy moving. he could feel his little hand at the top and baby would move it every time dp put his hand there so he's convinced he's taught baby to high five already!! so cute!smile

PseudoBadger Tue 02-Jul-13 11:58:18

On a return to last week's thread - I've made 9 sultana scones. That's lunch sorted grin

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 12:01:23

I bought a baby Bjorn last night...I think I need a degree in baby technology to fathom out all the fastenings, very confused!

HotSoupDumpling Tue 02-Jul-13 12:34:27

That is adorable Roofio! I still can't identify how my baby is lying and which bits are where!

STOP talking about scones already! (I can't justify them as I'd never finish a whole packet and some clotted cream by myself...)

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 12:35:34

"STOP talking about scones already! (I can't justify them as I'd never finish a whole packet and some clotted cream by myself...)" - HotSoupDumping

That sounds like a challenge to me!

HotSoupDumpling Tue 02-Jul-13 12:39:07

Are you challenging me?! (Right, that's it - I'm off to buy some scones and cream!!)

I was starving this morning so scoffed two french toasts, bacon and honey. Still feeling slightly ill.

cazboldy Tue 02-Jul-13 12:47:50

im starving today too

I have had a bowl of crunchy nut
an apple
3 rounds of toast and jam
a whole pack of shortbread biscuits (6 big fingers)
a banana

( and I'm now going to make a sugar sandwich which is my absolute all time fave! blush and dh hates me having them!)

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 12:55:23

A sugar sandwich?? I've never even heard of it, isit literally as it sounds?

So far today I've had a sausage roll 5 rich tea fingers and some French bread with salad cream and cucumber and now I have an almighty stomache ache lol

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 13:01:14

My hunger levels have dropped greatly in the last week or so. I couldn't make it between meals without eating toast, cereal, fruit etc, but now I am back to normal appetite really (27 weeks tomorrow). I am sure it will come back around again though smile

I cannot believe that my baby is due 3 months from today. That's crazy!

favellio Tue 02-Jul-13 13:11:26

Wow you ladies can talk lol think I've pretty much caught up, and thought I better check in on the new thread!
I think we've finally decided on which buggy and cot we are going for. Just need to find somewhere that has them in stock to see them in person first (then order them cheaper online wink)

Buggy-wise we love the Maxi-cosi Elea. It's got amazing reviews and all the features we want. Just gotta decide whether to get it in red or black!

For the cot we are going to splash out on a Stokke Sleepi system that will see them through from birth to 10 yrs with the extension system. It will also be something we can pass on, hand down etc and the mini cot is the perfect size for our tiny flat until we can sell it and move somewhere bigger!

I'm 26 weeks tomorrow and although I feel the odd twinge and kicks in my fanjo, I'm definitely not feeling as many or as strongly as I thought I would at this point......damn you anterior placenta!!

Anyway, I hope everyone's having a happy Tuesday envy

MrsO27 Tue 02-Jul-13 13:12:02

Just on my lunch break, so quickly catching up.

Clapham He does have more experience than me, but surely the salary should be role dependent and if he's coming in at my level/below, I don't see why he should get paid more. Salary is such an emotive subject though, almost wish I never found out. His appointment does present other issues, probably too many to list on here; but certainly leaves me feeling uneasy about how things will be on my return. Another junior member of the team has also recently left and this new guy is supposed to be picking up some of the work she did, however, with his experience etc. i'm now wondering if that (garbage) will be passed to me instead. I'm just going to have to stand my ground for now, but longer-term, this isn't a company I want to be with anymore. Just need to decide what I do indeed want to do career-wise and don't think i'll be in a position to decide that until I know what it's like to be a mummy.

roxvox It's interesting what you have said, I have read that men tend to get paid more because they are more likely to ask for pay rises. I know my dh is much more cut-throat when it comes to salary.

flyer I've been to the real Ramsay Street too. Was amazing! I also remember the song, I really wanted it for me and dh's first dance but he put his foot down so we went with an Al Green one instead. Spoil sport.

Happy vacuum-bagging this weekend smitten! It's so much fun. (oh god, did i just say that?, I''ve been pregnant too long....)

TheCatIsUpTheDuff Tue 02-Jul-13 13:17:02

Smitten -where did you get the massive chest of drawers? Is it fairly sturdy? My beloved IKEA one is falling to bits and I really need a huge one for baby things and sheets and towels.

Natalie - good to hear your little chap is moving about again.

I had 24-week check yesterday, heard good, strong heartbeat and baby still swimming around in there, which is reassuring as I'm still not feeling that much movement with the anterior placenta. Midwife thinks all is fine, though. Booked in for anti-D at 28 weeks, got to go to different clinic for that and 28-week check, so hoping the midwife there is as nice as my usual one.

Midwife suggested we do Parentcraft classes as well as NCT. It sounds like there might be some overlap, but these are free and run by midwives, so can't hurt to do both, as DH and I are both novices.

GT - did you get my PM about the FB group? No worries if you're busy.

Crappy local Morrisons have run out of Toffee Crisps! What am I supposed to do now?

cazboldy Tue 02-Jul-13 13:39:32

yes Natalie just as it sounds..... bread,lots of butter (so the sugar sticks) and then sugar! yum! lol grin

Haylebop12 Tue 02-Jul-13 13:52:42

I've been quite good this morning, just a brew and 2 Slices of toast...

However dh is in his way back from work with a maccy d's grin

Smitten1981 Tue 02-Jul-13 14:00:11

Cat It's this set of drawers from Ikea, I have it in blue and it looks lovely. You can fit loads in there and it's the right height for a changing table too!

www.ikea.com/gb/en/catalog/products/10239280

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 14:08:16

cat GT has been silent today so not sure she is around. do you want to PM me and I will try to add you? not sure if I need your Facebook name or email address so best send me both.

tired tired tired 27+2 and im so tired she is very busy today but has not been the last few days, I think they have sleepy growing days?

Hope all is well smile

Shootingstarsandcomets Tue 02-Jul-13 14:55:21

9 pages already! Sorry I'm not caught up at all but checking in now!
Have finally wallpapered ds' elephant onto his wall and uploaded pics to FB. I'm quite pleased with it! Not made a start at all and dc2's room though.
Anyone know where I can get travel insurance from to cover me up to 35 weeks pregnant? I can only find up to 32 weeks.

PseudoBadger Tue 02-Jul-13 14:59:10

The pics are lovely Shooting smile

Smitten1981 Tue 02-Jul-13 17:04:52

The office gossip came up to me earlier gesticulating cupping boobs and was like "oooh you've got a bump now, your boobs are MASSIVE" in front of the whole office. Then someone else chipped in with "I thought that when you came in this morning that your bump is big".

The whole bump discussion thing makes me feel really uncomfortable and my boobs really haven't grown that much. I'm still wearing my old cup size with a back extender.

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 17:11:44

smitten I don't mind bump comments (because I like it when people say I actually look pregnant and not just carrying extra weight on my front), but I would not be happy if someone at work commented on my boobs!

PseudoBadger Tue 02-Jul-13 17:17:46

Smitten I didn't tell anyone at work until about 14 weeks I think. A colleague said "oh good, we were wondering why you'd bothered to lose all that weight last year when you were just going to put it on again" shock

cat I have some toffee crisps hidden in the water dispenser in the fridge so the dc's don't nick them. Are you jealous?

I've just got home from soft play after being there since lunch time my bum really hurts. The seats there are so bloody hard. I would take a cushion next time if I thought it wouldn't attract stares.

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 17:27:06

MoN I have to hide chocolate from DP at Christmas time he ate 8 bars of chocolate from a selection box in one go...grin He cannot be trusted where chocolate or cake is concerned...

Hi ladies, I've been keeping up with reading the thread but never seem to get around to posting, busy busy at the moment with end of term nearing, both DD's having trips, sports days, fetes etc!

I'm feeling and seeing kicks a plenty now, has quiet moments/days but I try and presume it still has room to hide, seeing midwife next mon (I'll be 25+3) seems like such a long time since my 16wk app.

Still negotiating my finish date, DD2 starts school and I want to be off of my evening shifts when she starts full time (9th sept) and I was planning on still working a few Sundays, but we have 2 free tickets to legoland for the 8th, don't think I'll feel like going in just for the 15th after a week off, ho hum decisions decisions!

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 17:52:13

Just had a sneaky peak at the July thread and they already had 11 babies arrive before it was even July!

Does anyone feel like the stage we are all at now isit a bit of a lull if that makes sense? Not too much going on in way of appts/scans all have felt first movements but no where near the end yet either xx

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 17:57:40

do you think Kate Middleton is secretly on July thread...?

roxvox you should come to my office for boobs comments. There are a few gay guys in my team and they love boobs... comment on my modest growth all the time. Honestly - what is it with gay men and obsession with boobs...?

Still in the office listening to our company strategy meeting until 7pm... sigh...

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 18:06:53

Defo clapham I bet Kate is on the July thread talking about her piles, copious amounts of discharge, stretch marks and pregnancy rage grin

Wickedgirl Tue 02-Jul-13 18:09:11

I am 25+6 and haven't seen a midwife since I was 16 weeks. I still have 2more weeks to wait too. It is starting to really drag. It is lovely that some of us are entering the 3rd trimester. It won't be long until some people are on single week countdowns rather than the double figures (only 14 more weeks for me).

I wonder how many of us will be early.

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 18:11:07

haha flyer. I think her username is "imnotreallykatemiddleton"

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 18:12:28

I think I had best avoid your office then clapham! Gay, straight, male or female, I am not very good with comments about my appearance in any way!

I have often wondered if Kate Middleton is secretly on a thread too! I read earlier that papparazzi are already camping out at the hospital she is going to give birth in, yet she's not due for 2 weeks yet! Poor girl.

funkky Tue 02-Jul-13 18:19:08

Lol@ Kate Middleton on Julynthread. I honestly hope she's alright with all the moving around and smiling she has to do. I wonder if she gives prince Harry grief when she's very emotional like I do to my DH. grin.

Had 28 week appointment with MW today and i saw a different MW, this is the 4th person as I see a different person each appointment cause in my area appointments are in ur GP surgery and the MWs seem to keep changing.

Was offered a tour of the mat unit though which I accepted but not sure i will take it cause we move in August so will likely be changing hospital close to baby due date.

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 18:19:57

Lol clapham creative username I wish I'd thought of that one.

So I had my 25w mw appiontment today. We was flicking through my notes and saw I had seen the consultant regarding the group b streptococcus I have, I was told I could not go into the birthing pool as I have to have iv antibiotics throughout my labour. Anyway mw was saying I can indeed use the birthing pool. So my question is who is opting for one? And have you ladies who've got babies used the pool, what are your thoughts/recommendations on them. Thanks

funkky Tue 02-Jul-13 18:20:20

Prince Harry shock lol

Obviously meant Prince William

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 18:22:59

Hey clapham Kate M wears heels and she isn't a chav! Lol gringrin
I wonder if her feet swell in them like mine did...

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 18:25:57

you know what... I was thinking exactly the same thing earlier! she definitely manages to do pregnancy and heals.

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 18:26:10

heels even :-)

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 18:30:11

Kim Kardashians style v Kate M....worlds apart. Kate M has looked so stylish throughout her pregnancy, but then again she is royalty.

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 18:30:34

ps. I really hope to do birthing pool this time flyer! couldn't do it with DS though so no experience...

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 18:31:49

U no what in all the pics I have seen of Kate pregnant she barely has a bump either that or she hides it extremely well, I wonder if she has to put up with rediculous comments from ppl like 'look at the size your boobs' 'look at the size of your arse' lol did Kate have a baby shower?

Seriously as much as I don't wanna constipated and I no I mentioned this a few days ago but everytime I eat I seem to spend the next few hours on the toilet on and off which is no good cos it means I can be on and off the toilet till 3am after I've had dinner and its certainly making it rather sore!

I'm certain I don't have a bug as its been going on for like a week and I'm not feeling ill at all, I haven't had pregnancy vitamins for a week either now as someone mentioned that they can sometimes cause it.

I seem to have seen my midwife loads for some reason I saw her at 5,13,18,22 and booked in for 26 weeks then again at 27weeks for GTT then consultant at 28 weeks. ? As well as already seeing consultant at 15 weeks

Haylebop12 Tue 02-Jul-13 18:47:46

flyer using a pool never crosses my mind with dd but since watching one born every minute I really want to. Will arrange my tour of the hosp for when I've broken up from
Work probably and discuss it then. I didn't have dd there as I was living in Lancashire at the time so had her in Bury.

threeblondies I'm finishing work end of august for the same reason. Dd starts school plus I'm already getting fed up! Can you tag holiday on to extend it?

My mw appts are 8, 16, 25, 31, 34, 36, 38, 40 + 42. Funny how they all differ!

Sorry a few of you are having reduced movements. Glad you got reassurance and hope white blood count doesn't affect anything feminist.
MoN how cute!
Wow at some of us being into third trimester already!
I get daily comments about my bump at work, although mainly positive about it being neat or looking nice I don't like being told it is little. Andone day it won't be so small and all at the front and more and I don't want to be told I have spread out then!
Midwife appointment on Friday and that is also latest day I can tell work when I plan to leave so hoping I get my mat1 form then. I then have a physio appointment next week. Glad as I was limping again today.

Shootingstarsandcomets Tue 02-Jul-13 19:02:39

Kate middletons bump is tiny, I think mine is the same size and I have lots of weeks to go!
No advice on birthing pool either sorry flyer ds was an emcs and this one looks like being elcs or if I do get my way and have a vbac they'll have me very closely watched I think so no way they'd let me in a pool. My friend had one though and get all the way to pushing with no pain relief but then she pushed for two hours and her little girl had got stuck so she ended up as an emcs. She said it was good whilst it lasted though!
Can't believe some people are in third trimester already. Weeks still flying by here but only because I have ds to focus on and forget I'm pregnant some days!

Yes it's my holiday I'm trying to work out Hayle because I've been there forever I get 8wks hol so mat leave won't kick in till week I'm due, but got a week off in July and one at end of Aug so trying to decide if I should swap a few of those days to take in sept, I'm hardly going to be there lol!

Oh and some inside knowledge, the end of season Next sale starts on the 13th July, I'll let u know of any potential brilliant bargains, I don't need much but like browsing on behalf of other people grin

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 19:11:13

Does that mean they will be getting all the winter clothes in threeblondies cos its hard enough to buy boys clothes as it is never mind when its all shorts and tshirts lol

Yep the winter range will start coming in after! We have such a small section of little boys/baby stuff, then the less money it takes the smaller an area it gets! Baffling!

chickieno1 Tue 02-Jul-13 19:20:31

Yikes! Missed the end of the last thread. Will go and catch up and then come back to post properly.

Hope everyone is okay.

Haylebop12 Tue 02-Jul-13 19:21:00

Eeek I get paid on the 12th!

Thanks for the info blondies!!

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Tue 02-Jul-13 19:40:11

Flyer - I didn't use a birthing pool with DD but I did spend pretty much all my labour in the ensuite bath tub (only got out to actually give birth). It was brilliant for pain relief, ease of movement etc and I'm sure being in water contributed to my speedy labour (arrived at hospital at 9am - DD out at 11.43am) and only needing gas and air.

Tbh I can't imagine labouring on dry land after last time, being in water just felt 'right'. But as you all know I do love my baths wink blush

I don't know if I will have access to a birthing pool this time (opting to give birth in the standard delivery unit not the MLU) but as long as I can get in a bath I'll be very happy!

cazboldy Tue 02-Jul-13 19:58:53

I was in the pool with ds1, but just as it was time to push i wanted to get out!

with all of my labours i have wanted to be in the bath in early labour, and my last one was born in the bath at home just as the mw was running up the stairs.

am planning on the living room with this one, but who knows! smile

I haven't seen the mw since 16 wks either. I have a GTT test next thursday morning (and the farrier is coming that day, and I'm going to see the script in the evening!) and then the mw for my 28 wk appt the following monday, when i will be exactly 28 wks!

ComtessedeFrouFrou Tue 02-Jul-13 20:07:41

I've always thought I wouldn't want to use the pool because Im not a bath person but several people have mentioned it to me now.

Can't wait for NCT classes in Aug, got lots of questions!

We're on holiday and doing lots of wandering round towns and museums - I keep forgetting that I can't do as much as I used to - my back starts aching and today in a museum I think my piles must have been throbbing blush

Two very long days in a row and I'm shattered now.

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 20:09:45

I would like to use a birthing pool too, but have no experience (this is my first). I am not sure if my hospital has the facilities though. They do not offer tours of the maternity unit, so I guess I'll just have to query everyone and anyone who has given birth there to find out!

Has anyone had any experience with either Close Parent Pop in nappies, or TotsBots nappies? My council are doing an offer at the minute where I can buy a selection bundle of one sort or the other for £20 (normally £90). I can only use the offer once, so I am keen to get my choice right!

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 20:17:44

Baby natalieand is behaving this evening he's jumping all over the place dh can see my belly moving from the other side of the room lol.

I am not allowed a water birth as I'm significantly overweight they say its too risky if I get I to difficulties and struggle to help me out the water... Bit rude if u ask me lol I would have liked to at least labour in the water but don't no if that would even be possible x

Glad he is being a good boy.
I am hoping for water birth, two of the four rooms in the MLU have them so will have to wait and see.

roofio87 Tue 02-Jul-13 20:56:10

I don't want to use a pool. just doesn't appeal to me at all!! not sure why though!
my favorite comment from one of the teenagers I work with tonight was "you look bigger every time I see you!" err, yes you see me once a week and the baby is growing!! she seemed genuinely surprised though!!

Wickedgirl Tue 02-Jul-13 20:57:57

I too am thinking of a water birth this time. My other 3were typical hospital births so it will be a new experience for me

textbook Tue 02-Jul-13 21:05:57

Can everyone stop talking about scones and clotted cream please - I'm STARVING today grin

MrsO27 Tue 02-Jul-13 21:08:24

Kate M's baby bump is very neat. Anyone seen pics of Frankie from the Saturdays? She's due in November but I think looks like she's due sooner than that. I have the midwife for my 24 week appt. this Thursday. Will get to hear the heartbeat for the first time. Ladies who've been through this before - are there any midwife appointments before the birth where they check your lady bits? Just want to be prepared for that if they do!

JellyCurls Tue 02-Jul-13 21:11:24

No water birth for me either, had two medical deliveries so far and think will opt for what I know. Last labour was only 2 hours so doubt that would give them enough time to fill the pool anyway.

Strong braxton hicks taking my breath away strong for me tonight and baby still not really moving so looks like I will be calling the midwife tomorrow. Guessing baby has just moved so is kicking inways but think I need a sanity check

PseudoBadger Tue 02-Jul-13 21:11:27

No lady bit checking here MrsO - until the consultant did my sweep without telling me

Wickedgirl Tue 02-Jul-13 21:15:19

jelly I got to hospital 40 minutes before baby 3 was born. I am still hoping for a water birth though.

mrsO I have never had any "intimate" checks other than those done in labour

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 21:15:33

So the ladies that are considering gong into the birthing pool would you like your DH's or DP's to go in with you? I asked mine earlier and he said he would really like to....crazy man gringrin but I'd quite like that too, might me kind of comforting.

Wickedgirl Tue 02-Jul-13 21:16:32

Flyer.....no way. Just me in the water.

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 21:17:08

mrso the only time I was examined Down there was at 28 weeks when I thought I had leaked waters but it was infant pee blush lol and when I had sweeps and then obviously when in labour x

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 21:18:38

infant pee I mean infact pee haha awkward ...

Shootingstarsandcomets Tue 02-Jul-13 21:24:19

I only ever had one check down there to confirm that my waters were leaking and I wasn't wetting myself! Don't think they normally check you until they start examining your cervix in labour?
Just booked next years holiday flights!! Not for the baby I can add him/her when he/she arrives. Quite exciting though, I'll have 7 months to become beach body beautiful lets hope I can do it! Eeek!

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 21:25:23

Lovely shooting where are you all off to?

I think a water birth looks amazing. The bit that puts me off is that I get hot and faint when in pain and would probably want to get back out when that happens. I would be reluctant to be in there for the pushing- I know I probably won't care at the time but the thought of sitting in a pool full of waters and gunk makes me feel a bit sick!! Don't think DP would be v impressed with that either lol. Again, I know I probably won't care.

Thanks for the nice comments, baby is back to its normal self now. And so am I! My mum came with me to be assessed this morning. While waiting and listening to screams I told her that I was going to breathe my baby out and it will all be v dignified and serene. She laughed at me grin

Is anyone else watching BBC2?! DP's dad is a bus driver, the thought of him sitting in training with a man singing about ice cream cones is making me laugh. Saving child genius for when DP gets back from camp, no spoilers please!!

Haylebop12 Tue 02-Jul-13 21:42:19

mrsO no internals until labour here also. Some feeling baby's position quite low down towards the end but nothing intimate.

flyer dh is the opposite. First thing he said to me when I mentioned I was considering a water birth was "we'll I'm not getting in with you!"

natalie infant pee grin

roofio87 Tue 02-Jul-13 21:54:13

I had no idea that ur partner could get in the pool with you!!!! another thing putting me off a water birth Haha!!

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 22:16:14

So it's seems blokes in the pool isn't the norm then. I'd probably end up drowning DP in there when I'm in pain and he starts annoying me grin haha!

I baked a whole tray of flapjacks about an hour ago, DP and I just polished off the whole lot, now feeling v v sick and glutinous. A healthy tea there too.

Aww don't let us put you off Flyer as long as DP knows what to expect and you're comfortable then go for it! It's not unheard of.

MrsO27 Tue 02-Jul-13 22:33:37

I read 'infant pee' loads of times before I read your follow on comment natalie haha! I was thinking, surely infant pee would not be a good sign!!
You've put my mind at rest ladies. No mad 'grooming' panics for a few weeks yet grin. That's if it will still be physically possible to do any grooming in that area in a few weeks time blush

Natalieand Tue 02-Jul-13 22:47:57

Opinions needed fallen in love with a new name

Theo....?

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 22:53:45

I love it Natalie. Our next door neighbours boy is called Theo. I suggested it to DP but he wasn't keen..it goes well with your surname too.

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 23:05:06

sorry to lower the tone (again) bit does anyone know if the actor playing Luther is single and potentially interested in pregnant women? so hot!!!

love Theo Natalie, one of my favourite names

DP is not getting in the pool with me - he is not small... so the pool would overflow. Simple facts

roxvox Tue 02-Jul-13 23:08:14

natalieand Theo is a family name for us (DH's Dad's middle name and his Grandad's first name, and his great-Grandad's middle name etc), but it's been poached by another family member now so we can't really use it. I do think it's a lovely name though. wickedgirl has it on her name list too according to Google docs!

SeriousStuff Tue 02-Jul-13 23:12:53

Oh my gosh - I've missed two whole threads!

Re. the pool debate, I was all for it until recently and I've started worrying that being in 'dirty' water will get on my nerves on the day...am I over-thinking it? I definitely wouldn't want DH in there and I don't think he'd want to be!

I'm 25+2 today and had my latest midwife meeting. I measure at 26 weeks apparently - how accurate are the measurements?

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 23:13:08

What's the actors name clapham?

Am I the only saddo on here that read 50 shades of grey and can't wait to find out who will be cast as Christian Grey?! I hear Matt bomber (total hunk) or Ian somerhalder (also a hunk) are the favourites. Matt Bomer is just lush.

claphammama Tue 02-Jul-13 23:16:28

he is called Idris Elba. google him. Is it just mean or does anyone else think he is hot.

Haven't read 50 shades of grey I'm afraid. Am I missing much? DP's 77 old mum has though!

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 23:18:49

Good point about size of DP's clapham. It would be like sharing a pool with shamu from sea world gringrin. DP isn't overweight he is just a big built guy.

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 23:23:12

Just googled him, he looks hot in some pics not so in others. I liked 50 shades, the books weren't very well written but I'm a soft cow and liked the romance/love story side of it, and fell in love with Christian Grey a messed up millionaire who is fit as...

Flyer747 Tue 02-Jul-13 23:25:48

Btw I was on about my DP being like shamu not yours...I re read that post and it sounded like I insulted your DP shock

Prisci Tue 02-Jul-13 23:30:27

Joining in, I have been watching since the start but never got round to posting, expecting 3rd DC. I never saw myself with 3, still getting used to the idea, it was a surprise. Theo is a great name, it is the one of our first DC, everyone seem to like it but it is not so popular that he is likely to have one in his class.
Someone, was asking about velour sleepsuits, John Lewis has some cute one http://www.johnlewis.com/john-lewis-baby-teddy-faces-velour-sleepsuit-white/p290881, at a reasonable price. Petit bateau has some too, but much more expensive and they size very small, never buy new born, go direct 1 or 3months size.
In terms of stroller, highly recommend the Cameleon, it is so easy to go around with, the bassinet part is great in the first few weeks. We bought it for DC1, used it for DC2 and then I let it to a friend before thinking of selling it since we were done but now it is going to be used for DC3. You can change the cover if you wish and the after care is really great, if you lose a part, they UPS it to you anywhere free of charge mostly.
Jealous of everyone eating what they want, having to spend a good part of my pregnancy in France, they are so crazy about putting on weight, it is incredible. I put 6lb in a month after going on holidays and being quite tired, my OB was like, there must be something wrong with you, had to take a complete set of blood test (all fine) and was given a hell of a lecture about how it is not healthy etc...You also get checked down there every month as a routine, which I really don't see the point. Sorry needed a small rant.

Welcome prisci, good tip about petit bateau clothes measuring small. I have heard john Lewis baby clothes a longer than other brands. It is interesting they are not standard sizes.
French antenatal care sounds a bit brutal. Umlauf has had similar issues with weight expectations on the continent.
I have put on 5lb in the last week...

Have been laying awake for hours sad too hot and thinking about work.

ananikifo Wed 03-Jul-13 07:41:34

Welcome Prisci! Thanks for the tip on velour sleep suits. It's funny how different places have different routines for antenatal care.

Claphammamma: Canada Day is virtually always a beautiful, sunny, hot day. You have barbecues and ice cream and beer, and there are fireworks shows in the evening. Also I think Idris Alba has a bit of a following so it's not just you. He was on the Office and part of his storyline was how all the women in the office thought he was hot.

I had a dream that I conceived again while still pregnant with this one. So two babies of different ages in my uterus at the same time. I think I had a scan in the dream because I can picture it visually. We kept preparing for the first baby but not for the second because the second would be born a few months later so we had time. Then I was about to give birth to the first and got really upset that we weren't prepared for the second, and it was like everyone had forgotten about my second baby even though I loved her just as much. How weird is that?shock

Shirehobbit Wed 03-Jul-13 08:01:55

I had very odd dreams last night too, but mine were about the end of the world shock and I was trying to stop it happening. I awoke more tired than when I went to bed!
Taking 100 children to Chester Zoo today. I wonder if we'll bring them all back...

favellio Wed 03-Jul-13 08:31:14

I dreamt last night that I gave birth at work in front of all my students, baring in mind I teach autistic adults, it was terrifying and comical blush

Warlin Wed 03-Jul-13 08:32:31

Hi All

2 weeks away and another whole thread has been filled...you ladies can talk!!

We had a lovely time in Portugal but was not the relaxing sun holiday that I have been used to. DS was cranky with the heat at the start and I found it too hot towards the end. Also a lot of hassle taking all the baby stuff with us so I think I need another holiday to recover smile I did manage a lovely pregnancy massage though smile

I had a slight scare when away with a little amniotic fluid leak. I rang the midwife when I got home and she said because there hadn 't been any more that I shouldn't worry...still it has panicked me a little as I'm scared of going too early.

I have nothing organised for this baby either. Haven't bought anything for him....poor baby. We did go looking at prams at the weekend though. Orange I have a bugaboo camelion and am torn now between the bugaboo donkey and the Babyjogger. I love my camelion for nice long walks but I find it a pain to put in the boot of the car as it is in 2 pieces (as most of the travel systems are). I tend to use my silver cross buggy when going to the shops etc. The bugaboos are so comfortable for the babies though and the seat is large and roomy. I had thought this time that the babyjogger was a good in between, in that it folds down in 1 so is easy to transport and is semi comfortable but I am now swaying towards buying a donkey and just selling my camelion as it's so much better for young babies than the babyjogger. I will prob end up getting a new double buggy too as I just can't imagine loading the donkey, along with 2 seats eventually, into the car every time I need to pop to the shops. I'm not keen on the ICandy peach as I don't like a double with one in front of the other.

I'm with you on the dog front bridget and pseudo. We live beside a country park but the walk down to the beach is really hilly so I have been cheating and driving down recently. My bump is very low so I'm finding it uncomfortable to walk up hills. Had a fight with DH over the dog this morning which has made me so upset. I love our dog to bits (2 year old black lab)..she is my baby and very much my dog. DH runs with her in the mornings and I walk her in the evening. It is such hard work with a LO, being pregnant and working full time but I would never part with her. Anyway DH has been making comments about how hard it's going to be when DC2 comes and how the hygiene bothers him of having a crawler round the floors when the dog is about etc...I feel like he wishes we didn't have her as life would be easier but I would never give her away and think it's great for kids to grow up with dogs. He hasn't actually said that but I am getting that impression and there is no way in a million years I would give her away. Just stresses me out sad

Anyway sorry for the whinge. 27 weeks today...where has the time gone. Can't believe we are entering the third trimester already..scary. I am starting to get excited (and a little worried)!!

Will try and catch up with the rest of the thread today. Hope everyone is having as good a time with pregnancy as possible. x

Shootingstarsandcomets Wed 03-Jul-13 08:40:08

Ooh warlin that's what happened to me and they were very concerned I had to go to hospital and have steroid injections for babys lungs in case I went early and then I had a Doppler scan every week, two blood tests a week and two ctg's a week- make sure you keep an eye on it, it can be quite serious.
clapham agree totally about Luther being hot! Love that programme, we have it recorded as I was too tired to stay awake to watch it last night. Also love the name theo natalie

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 08:55:41

Welcome prisci. Yes, I completely forgot how different these sizes can be! I remember that I found Petit Bateau ridiculously small (obviously made for skinny French babies), baby Gap was also relatively small but pretty much corresponded with DS's age and John Lewis and M&S lasted longer as were much bigger than other brands. DS was an August baby and, after September, lived for months in velour sleepsuits. I found all fancy clothes (trousers, shirts etc...) really impractical on small babies. Difficult to put on and a nightmare to take off for all nappy changes. Not planning to buy any "normal" clothes at least for the first 6 months.

ana glad it's not just me! I don't think he is necessarily best looking but has a really sexy presence if it makes any sense... And how funny is your dream! I imagine it was quite distressing. MoN any exciting Desperate Dan dreams from you last night? :-)

flyer trust me, you are not offending my DP... he is very much shamu like. A lot of it is his height and big build but some of it is plain fat I'm struggling to shift with the best of diets... his mother did something terrible to his metabolism when he was a child.

cat now that you are on facebook you need to post the obligatory photo of your bump for us :-)

sorry you didn't sleep well orange. And work is almost over for you! 3 more weeks

I'm working from home today. Oh joy.

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 09:07:01

Crosspost. Sorry your holiday wasn't as relaxing as you wanted it to be warlin. And agree with you on the dog front - I don't have one now but grew up with dogs. They are part of family and I think it's amazing for children to have them. I wish I could have one too... your DH is probably overwhelmed by the thought of another baby but men have very strange ways of dealing with their emotions and expressing them. Perhaps this is where he focuses all his stress and fears?

Are you positive it was amniotic fluid you were leaking on holidays? Did they examine you and confirm it? Like shooting I'm really surprised at your midwife's relaxed reaction as my friend had it and they were all over her like a rash right to the end of her pregnancy... worth talking to another midwife / doctor?

I have Desperate Dan dreams almost every night Clapham. No wonder I'm exhausted.

Wickedgirl Wed 03-Jul-13 09:47:42

I love the name Theo and have managed to persuade DH into loving it too. That is our boys name (and Amelie if it's a girl).

If you want a hot, sexy male......google shemar Moore. He is Derek Morgan in criminal minds

I am 26 weeks today and have put on 18 pounds. I don't know if that's good or bad?

Smitten1981 Wed 03-Jul-13 09:49:38

I went to Argos after work yesterday and got a stack of vacuum bags as they were on half price. I started attacking the drawers at 10:30 last night. DH was like "what on earth are you doing? Can't it wait?". Nooo it can't wait. I managed to free up 2 huge drawers.

Tonight's action plan is to empty the wardrobe of all the clothes that no longer fit and squirrel them away until the after baby diet starts.

roofio87 Wed 03-Jul-13 09:52:10

wikedgirl I LOVE criminal minds!! but I have a weird thing for the guy who plays Hotchner, even though he's old enough to be my dad!!

Shootingstarsandcomets Wed 03-Jul-13 10:15:50

Ha ha smitten, love the nesting instinct! Hasn't got me yet, hope it does soon, I have lots to do!

MrsO27 Wed 03-Jul-13 10:16:52

I'm 24 weeks today and according to the app on my phone, baby is the same size as a corn on the cob! For those ladies who have mentioned they are 27 weeks, your babies are the same size as a cauliflower (but hopefully not as round and leafy).

MrsO27 Wed 03-Jul-13 10:23:16

...and for babies in-between, 25 weeks is a swede and 26 weeks a cucumber. It's all a bit random but makes me smile every week

roofio87 Wed 03-Jul-13 10:24:43

I'm going away this weekend and will be 27 weeks on Friday
I should take my green notes with me shouldn't I?!!! just in case!!

HotSoupDumpling Wed 03-Jul-13 10:40:17

Yup - definitely Roofio! I bring mine everywhere in a tote bag (was told to by the midwife).

Great nesting Smitten. I've been attacking my drawers bit by bit, have managed to throw away a load of disgusting 5 year old make-up (freebies from Boots and the such-like).

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 10:41:13

MrsO it amuses me the weekly fruit & veg comparisons. Last week I was an eggplant (aubergine) obviously an American App (what to expect app) this week I'm still an aubergine, just obviously a fatter bigger one! Just about to weigh myself yikes!

Wickedgirl Wed 03-Jul-13 10:45:05

Roofio....I keep my maternity notes in my car so they are always close to hand should I need them.

SSA Aaron Hotchner??? Surely not! Morgan all the way. Lol

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 10:49:50

Weight currently 10 stone 8. Weight when I found out I was expecting was 8 stone 2... So 2 stone 6lbs... Or 34 pounds. Feel sad I've put so much on.

Natalieand Wed 03-Jul-13 10:52:27

My notes are purple? They were green when I had dd though and I only take mine to appts or if I'm away away

flyer how did weigh in go? I weighed myself today I'm 25+2 and up 9.5 lbs x

roxvox Wed 03-Jul-13 11:04:37

My notes are yellow... Must be different depending on where you live!

I weighed myself and have put on about 17lbs (27 weeks today)... I have no idea if that's good or bad, but I haven't put on weight around my face/bum where it usually goes so I am just assuming it's all baby weight!

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 11:08:34

I have put weight on everywhere and I am feeling really shit now, I wish I'd stayed away from the bloody scales...It sounds really dramatic but I want to cry I can't believe I've obviously eaten so much...sorry for moany post.

roxvox Wed 03-Jul-13 11:21:43

Flyer some people do put on more weight than others during pregnancy, and they may lose it just as quickly as they put it on! At the end of the day I think we should be eating what we want to eat (obviously apart from the no-no foods) because pregnancy should be a happy time and food is a strange subject when we're pregnant because of cravings and aversions. At the end of the day it's not irreversible, and it's not hurting anyone.

Smitten1981 Wed 03-Jul-13 11:32:47

I'm staying as far away from the scales as I can. I've definitely noticed that my bump feels so much heavier this week, it's got some real gravity to it. I do feel really cumbersome though.

One of my friends had a very premature baby at 25 weeks a few years ago (completely fine now) and I was looking at the pics last night from when he was first born. I can't fathom that my baby is that size already. Crazy!

On another note how amazing is this? (link below) I wish they did it here, I'm sure it wouldn't cost the government anything as the companies would all be vying to donate items for marketing. Better than Bounty anyway!

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2354516/Will-royal-baby-sleeping-BOX-Finland-sends-Duchess-Cambridge-traditional-baby-kit.html

Wickedgirl Wed 03-Jul-13 11:34:22

Flyer....... I put on 4 stone in my last pregnancy. I started at 8 stone 2 and went up to 12 stone. I lost most of it quite quickly though. I really wouldn't worry......that tiny baby inside of you needs to be fed

Wickedgirl Wed 03-Jul-13 11:37:14

Smitten......I would love one of those boxes. They look fab

Shootingstarsandcomets Wed 03-Jul-13 11:48:36

Oh flyer try not to be too down about it. All women are different, some put loads on and some don't. I am in the put loads on camp but I know it comes off so I'm not too distressed about it yet! Are you having a boy or girl? I think they say you put more on with girls- not true for my case though! Remember a lot of it is water at this stage and extra blood and the placenta so its not all 'fat'

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 11:55:12

Thanks for reassuring comments. Shooting we are having a surprise, although most people think it's a girl, maybe that's why. I've just downloaded a few new books and am going to sit outside and get lost in a book rather than sat here moping around feeling sorry for myself!

Umlauf Wed 03-Jul-13 11:59:22

flyer my lovely you sound really down, try not to be. Easier said than done i know, as I have also put on around that much but I was nowhere near as slender as you to begin with (in fact nearer to your now weight!!!) and I too feel totally crap about it. I've got he baby in my tummy, one in each bum cheek, and really tiny babies hiding in my bingo wings and one posing as an additional chin.

Things I have done to feel better: 1) chuck scales. 2)pack away ALL clothes that don't fit right now, hide them all! Only keep maternity stuff out. 3)plan healthy meals 4)plan after-birth weigh loss plan (for me, planning helps even if I never do the stuff!)

Welcome prisci and bonjour! Are you having the baby in France or England? I totally know what you mean about petit bateau, I bought a little t shirt for my friends baby's first birthday, he is a chunky little lad and I knew French babies were small so we bought age 2, hoping he wouldn't be offended..... It was too blimming small! It is true about French babies being small though! We live right on the border and Spanish babies are lovely and cuddly, and you can just tell who the French day-trippers are!

I'm also a victim of the European pregnancy starvation regime. Obviously, as I've described above, its not worked, and they just despair at my bulbous body at each midwife visit! I cry for the 20 mins following the visit, and then come on here and laugh it off with the lovely normal ladies of mumsnet!! I imagine France must be ever stricter than Spain though (based only on my observations on the size of their babies!)

funkky Wed 03-Jul-13 12:04:02

aww flyer, am not too fussed about weight gain more concerned about losing it afterwards, some people gain only a little and still struggle to lose that after the baby is born.

Can I ask a really silly question as am 28 weeks today with first and starting to panic about labor. Is it really, really, really painful?! I know you forget the pain afterwards like they say but I always panicked about labor.
As a teenager, the only thing that kept me away from boys was not really my strict upbringing hmm but the petrifying fear of pushing a human being out from down there, just wondering what the pain intensity is like and I do not like watching OBEM!

Flyer dont be sad hun your were tiny to start with your allowed to gain weight when pg. I have gained 15lbs but I am "obese" to start with the bigger you are the less you tend to put on. I dont give a jot as long as Willow is healthy i will enjoy my few hours at the gym a week once she arrives all chubby and lovely!

umlauf and prisci poor you and those poor skinny french babies I cant imagine it. The cultural differences are vast!

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 12:20:54

Umlauf your post cheered me up....I also have a babies growing in my bum cheeks, thighs, etc etc!

I think your suggestion to plan healthy meals is what I shall do from now on. If any of my work colleagues even dare bring anymore haribos into the office I shall slap them grin and I'm also going to plan a after birth diet/exercise plan...DP was lovely and simply said "Caz you are growing a baby and you look lovely" thanks again.

Natalieand Wed 03-Jul-13 12:22:16

Lol funkky for me it was painfull don't get me wrong but as it starts mild and builds up it doesn't usually just wake u up in the middle of the night with full blown 10cm contractions of that makes sense plus you are kinda willing for the next contraction cos each one u have is a step closer too having your baby. My main after pain was like u no if u use a muscle I don't usually use a lot? Say u painted a wall and the muscles in your arm aches as your not used to painting a large amount my whole body felt like that for a cpl of days after but remember it can't be that bad or we wouldn't be back for second third fourth fifth even sixth dc lol

Warlin Wed 03-Jul-13 12:41:40

I have only put on a stone so far which is baffling me as my bump is huge. I was just under 9 stone before being pregnant with ds and put on 4 stone last time..2 stone by 20 weeks. I lost most of it pretty much straight away though did start this pregnancy a stone heavier at 10 stone. So I am the same shape and size as last time but haven't put on much...bizarre.

One thing I found odd after the birth of ds is that after losing all that fluid and of course the baby, my bump remained for a few days and I still looked 9 months pregnant. It did go down gradually but I was expecting to lose the bump immediately.

My notes are green and I only ever take them to appointments. I wonder when the NHS will manage a system where the patient doesn't have to carry around their own notes for 9 months smile

shooting it does scare me the difference between areas in the NHS. My midwife told me to ring the maternity unit and they would prob want to see me to check for infection etc...but when I rang them they said not to worrry as it had happened a week previously so unlikely to be my waters. Just keeping an eye really as wouldn't want to go this early!

JellyCurls Wed 03-Jul-13 12:42:01

Flyer try not to stress about weight gain, you will lose at least a stone the minute baby is here and then rest pretty quickly as a new born leaves you very little time to sit and eat.

funkky the pain of childbirth is difficult to describe, you know the pain you get in your calf when it goes into a bad cramp? Well contractions a bit like that but when it passes there is absolutely no after pain. And if you remember that each contraction is one step closer to meeting baby and when contraction is gone that one will never come back you will be fine. Advice would be to keep mobile, listen to your midwife and listen to your body and you will be fine

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 12:57:39

Jelly, I'm glad someone described what a contraction feels like because I too was wondering. Calf cramp is so painful..

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Wed 03-Jul-13 12:57:47

funkky - I think everyone's experiences of labour are unique and so much rests on things you can't control (like whether your baby is lying back to back etc.) but, purely personally, it was very painful but a very different sort of positive, almost exciting, pain.

Like Natalie I found it mentally very different as you actually want the contractions to get stronger and closer together as it means finally things are happening. Normally when you experience pain it is because you are ill/something is wrong in your body, but I found labour a complete contrast as the pain is actually good sign and I felt absolutely fine in between them.

It's hard to remember the detail (I think I went into a different head-space during labour) but I think the pain briefly became overwhelming during transition but that was then replaced with most overwhelming urge to push.

Please don't fret about your labour - it is a while since I read it, but from memory if you want some positive stories about labour "Stand and deliver, and other ways to give birth" is a good read. I think there is something in there about orgasmic births which I'm not sure I buy into but I do remember a phrase like "feel free to fart freely" encouraging me not feel inhibited!

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Wed 03-Jul-13 13:03:36

For me, my contractions were akin to period cramps but obviously much, much stronger. I could sort of feel my womb actually contracting and then releasing.

About 18lbs here, but like some others have said Flyer you were teeny to start with, so you should expect to put on more weight. I'm a chubber to begin with, so have a proper cabbage patch doll face as well as enormous bump, bingo wings, wobbly thighs...in fact, I'd be delighted to be your weight now when not pregnant!

28 week appointment on Monday, and pretty sure I am going to be measuring big - uterus is literally an inch or two below my ribs.

Haven't started carrying my notes anywhere blush - there is nothing remotely interesting in them, have no allergies etc, so don't really see why I need to...

Have any of you organised ladies got an suggestions for nice, bright unisex type baby grows? HATE baby pink, but don't want to dress this little one in very boyish clothes - but most unisex stuff is very pastel-y, which am really not keen on. Have seen a few nice bits in Next, but other suggestions welcome!

labour for me was extremely painful but it was only 4 hours long as oppose to a long gradual labour which is more "normal" for a first baby. Also as natalie says the first 2 hours were less painful than the last 2. My family have had all sorts of births a varying degrees of pain,time,complications in short its not something you can really plan but the thought that if it is sore every contraction gets you one step closer to your beautiful baby!!

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 13:17:05

Bowl are you having a surprise? Sorry I cannot remember. I put on the Facebook page we have (sorry I also am not sure if you are on it) I bought some unisex stuff from www.theessentialone.com they have lots of beige and neutrals and what I've bought off there is really nice quality.

SeriousStuff Wed 03-Jul-13 13:20:37

flyer I stopped weighing myself weeks ago, but last night, I caught a glimpse of my bum and lower back (areas I used to quite like) and they are covered in cellulite! It's so depressing but I'm trying to convince myself it's not forever...

We only have around 3 months to go!

No I'm having a girl Flyer, but not really keen on girly things smile. Have a DS, and when we found out this one was a girl got lots of 'oohh, how lovely, you'll be able to buy all the pretty girly things in pink' - made me quite stabby actually! Thanks for the link, I'll have a look - am not on Facebook so miss out on all of this bump bonding wink

And time is certainly ticking - I think 30 weeks is a real mental hurdle for me, will definitely feel like I am on the homeward stretch once I reach that!

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Wed 03-Jul-13 14:03:00

Oh, feeling a bit bad about recommending "Stand and Deliver" now..looking at the reviews on Amazon it is clearly a 'marmite' sort of book.

Also wanted to say to funkky I think it is totally normal to feel apprehensive about the birth.. I am too, except this time my fears centre more around what state my pelvic floor will be left in (already have a prolapse) rather than the pain.

Whatever happens, whether it is a quick or slow labour, you have no pain relief or the full works, need interventions or don't, birth vaginally or don't, I think all you can be sure of is that it will be you and your little one's unique story of how they entered the world and you'll do an amazing job (one that only you can do).

The OBEM thing is weird - whenever I watch it I can't relate it to my experience at all.

Warlin think you are doing the right thing to keep an eye on things - I'm also somewhat surprised that you weren't investigated further.

I'm sorry to hear the dog situation is causing stress. It is the opposite way round in the Hairy household - our dog is utterly devoted to DP and is very much his 'baby' even though I do 99.9% of the day-to-day care. They are ridiculously soppy over each other - he even carries her like a baby into the garden each night for her bedtime wee.

Unfortunately, although she brings a lot of fun into our lives, I do find dog ownership stressful and worry about the same sorts of things as your DP. DP and I both grew up with dogs but we still underestimated the work involved. We could never let her go (DP and DD would never forgive me) but I really do worry about juggling the dog's needs with those of a baby.

cuillereasoupe Wed 03-Jul-13 14:31:16

I imagine France must be ever stricter than Spain though

I'm in France and they don't seem too strict to me, though I've only put on a stone so far (24 and a half weeks). I do get a monthly "down there" rummage from the gynae though to check my cervix. I don't mind it - I reckon she's been doing it for twenty years, she'll have seen weirder and hairier than mine grin

I wanted to ask - I've been invited on a work thing in mid-September that will mean Eurostar + an overnight stay in Reading. I'm due at the very end of October. Am I mad to be contemplating it?

Slippysnow Wed 03-Jul-13 14:54:10

bridget I too am reading 'stand and deliver' Im really enjoying it! Really easy to dip into, funnily enough I was coming on to recommend it! Some bits are a bit hippy dippy, and I'm with you on not buying into the orgasmic delivery but I'm finding it quite empowering. The main thing I'm getting from the book is that we shouldn't feel rushed into delivering (unless seriously at risk) and to trust our body's.

There was also a really interesting bit about how pain can be a helpful guide of what to do next.

My baby jogger gt came today, got myself a bargain £245 with raincover woop!

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 14:55:44

oh no, don't stress flyer! I put on a lot with DS and it all went, with very little effort. I believe I'm the same size as you normally - also 5'4'' and size 8. And I eat healthily and not too much at all. I think perhaps our small bodies need to put on more weight to deal with pregnancy and feed the baby. I promise you it goes!

serious I also saw my bum and the back of my thighs in the mirror last week and was terrified seeing all the cellulite there... I also hope it will go... although not super happy thinking about my upcoming beach holiday... I think I will live in sarongs for 10 days to hide it...

I have similar experience and attitude towards birth pain as bridget. Unfortunately, mine was super painful as I was induced and didn't really have any breaks between contractions... but I focused on the fact that, with every contraction, my body was opening up for this new baby and that it was a normal healthy pain, not a bad pain. I also tried to remember that all this pain was temporary and noone has ever died of pain! I really think this attitude helped me deal with it and I really remember birth as a positive and lovely experience, despite being induced. So don't be scared funkky! And, as bridget I don't worry about birth itself but about what it will do to my body long term... I tore quite badly with DS so hope it won't happen again...

bowlfull I'm the same and totally understand. Not into girlie things and would struggle with pink. Before I knew I had another boy some people were saying (read: mainly DP's mum...) "it would be lovely to have a girl and dress her in lovely dresses, brush her hair..." Can't she see that I often can't be bothered to brush mine? :-) What about green? I love this colour and bought a lot of green stuff for DS when he was a baby. Or grey? I think grey looks really nice with pink and breaks it a bit so it makes pink look less sweet. Or love grey with yellow combination (also used on my DS a lot :-)

cuille I don't think you are mad. It's a short trip (on some days my commute is probably as long as a Eurostar trip!)

Yes will be going for more neutral colours - don't mind if people have to ask whether it's a boy or girl, but don't want to go too boyish so then everyone assumes she's a boy IYKWIM.

Flyer there is some really nice stuff on that site, thanks for sending the link.

On the what childbirth does to your body, I made a joke to DP around 'will be like a wizards sleeve after this one' - which clearly I am allowed to do as it my fanjo. He has since made at least 2 quips along these lines - he is either very brave or very stupid!

Shootingstarsandcomets Wed 03-Jul-13 15:42:31

jelly tootsmcginty do nice unisex clothes but don't think they start until a bit bigger than newborn. Also frugi and bob and blossom tend to be more fun than super girly. I'm the same as you of I have a girl she won't be in pink all the time.
Glad to hear you're keeping an eye on it warlin, when it happened to me it kept happening so perhaps yours wasn't an amnio leak and just discharge?
Have found holiday insurance to cover me up to 35 weeks so now just got to lie to the airline and fingers crossed they don't demand to see my notes or something. South of France here I come! Bet the beaches there will never have seen a preggo lady as large as moi if they are as strict as everyone says they are!

Warlin Wed 03-Jul-13 15:50:04

My first labour lasted 7 hours and I had a ball for the first few hours! I was induced...the Eurovision song contest was on and once on the gas and air I was in great form. Would def recommend as it's like being very tipsy after 9 months of practically no alcohol..think DH and the midwife were laughing at all my jokes which spurred me on!! Then as the pain really started to set in I moved onto remifentinol (which is slef administered) and worked for most of the time. I remember the pain becoming overwhelming all of a sudden and I really thought I needed a poo...turned out it was the head and it was time to push. All a bit of a blur and sore at the time but I'm less anxious this time about it so either it wasn't really that bad or else mother nature is very sneaky!!

I agree with everyone else, at least you get someone wonderful out of it. I have to get a wisdom tooth out after I have the baby and I'm dreading that more smile

I have to say though, I didn't get that wow, instant love sensation that you see in the movies...I was just totally exhausted, felt a bit sick and overwhelmed and wanted to sleep!

Lovely stuff on those sites as well, thanks shooting. I do get very confused every time I go to France for work - they are all SO slim, but seem to eat three courses for every meal. Don't understand!

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 16:03:25

I haven't read it bit heard about this book: http://mireilleguiliano.com/section/sub/14

Flyer I'm with everyone else on the weight front. I've struggled to feel comfortable in clothes as I've put on 2.5st and although I've always wanted to put on weight (women in my family are very slim until they get to about 40 and then go the complete opposite way) but this has happened quite quickly and a lot seems to have gone to my face which I'm not too keen on. But I have a friend who started out slimmer than me, put on about 4st and looked like a different person during pregnancy and now is back to looking exactly as she did before. So I'm trying to eat healthily because I know it's good for me and baby (and I'm a bit scared about the GTT) but will think about weight once the baby is here hopefully weighing 2st hmm

Jelly I'm with you and the unisex clothes, I love the bright and beautiful range at Next but have struggled to find other places that do unisex bright colours as well as the usual neutrals that I have some of. My mum found some in Sainsburys in the sale (she's the best bargain hunter) that are really bright. There's a sleepsuit with dinosaurs that has purple in it too to stop it being too boyish. I much prefer purple to pink for girls. grin @ Claphammama and hair brushing.

Bridget and Slippy thanks for the book recommendation I like the sound of it! Not sure about the orgasmic thing, but I am trying to think really positively about labour so that might help.

Off for early dinner with my dad, he's come to get me from work! Must order healthily...

SeriousStuff Wed 03-Jul-13 16:42:48

clapham my DH keeps telling me to try some aqua natal classes and he just doesn't get that even if it is going to be full of other pregnant women, I don't really want to wear a swimming costumer thank you! I'm jealous of your holiday though - a tan always helps!

SeriousStuff Wed 03-Jul-13 16:43:40

*costume

rubytwosday Wed 03-Jul-13 16:51:37

jelly I am also having a girl and hate pink! Have my eye on the cutest set of sleep suits (baby grows? Still don't fully understand the lingo!) in sainsburys. One is navy and white striped, one is green with white polka dots and one has colourful cats all over it. I really really want them but been in twice this week and they have only had newborn or 9-12 months. I don't want to wait til she's 9 months old but the newborn says upto 7 pounds and she might be bigger than that!

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 16:58:41

Serious and Clapham I'm thinking a tan might cover up the cellulite I currently have around my ass and tops of legs. I might have to find a deserted beach somewhere so I dare bare my body. Same as you 5ft 4 and a size 8, I always wanted to be taller but I blame myself for smoking as a teenager, (it must have stunted my growth as my sister is 5ft 8) grin

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 17:10:03

my sister is also 5'8'' flyer - how funny grin I'm a family midget and didn't smoke as a teenager. Don't really mind it to be honest but, like you, never feel I look good without heels

The logistics of tanning my ass and back legs still stress me out - I guess I will start digging this bump hole in the sand as soon as I arrive...

A small moan... my teeth are so sensitive today and I have a weird semi-painful feeling in my mouth all the time... it started last night, I couldn't drink anything cold and was in agony brushing my teeth. And it's still here. Apparently it's relatively common in pregnancy - but quite painful and ruins my mood today. Also, feeling incredibly thirsty all day no matter how much I drink. Anyone else with similar symptoms?

I actually did the bump hole when I went to Spain at 20 weeks - obviously bump was smaller but really worked, and was very comfortable!

Ruby was going to suggest online, but just checked sainsbo's site and they have sod all! Why is the range so limited online - very odd!

Umlauf Wed 03-Jul-13 17:23:44

Ooh I was thinking about the bump hole idea the other day!! Its raining loads at the moment but will hopefully get beach time in August... At the moment I look a completely different race front and back as only tanned on front!

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 17:40:34

Well hole in the sand it is then, people might think I'm an insane crazy pregnant lady when they see me digging, but hey ho I will never see them again and it means I will have an even tan. Clapham you can get your DS to dig your hole grin

My teeth are also really sensitive they have been for a while but I've blamed the sweets. I went to the dentist last week and got lectured about flossing more whilst being pregnant. I was also a bit miffed as I went for my 6 month check up and as it's now free he did the quickest slap dash job, funny how I need all sorts doing when I'm paying!

Also I have the thirst too, did yesterday as well, I've been naughty and had 5 mugs of tea both days. I'm into elderflower cordial at the moment , but that keeps hurting my teeth too.

HotSoupDumpling Wed 03-Jul-13 17:48:25

I absolutely love the bump in the sand idea!

Have really hit a wall when it comes to unisex baby clothing. Can't find anything that is just...a nice pattern. It's all cars or flowers, or 'I love mummy'. Grah!

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 17:55:14

All part of being a supportive partner flyer grin And I like elderflower cordial too. One of those not too sweet drinks I can bear

what about this hotsoup? I find that Nordic countries do unisex and interesting bold patterns really well [http://www.nordickids.co.uk/]

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 18:08:47

I've just confirmed my place on a hen do next year to Madrid for 3 nights, that will be my target for losing the baby weight! Already excited smile

HotSoupDumpling Wed 03-Jul-13 18:12:10

So cute clapham!

Flyer, forgot to say, don't be down about weight. As everyone says, women put on and lose weight very differently during pregnancy. And it's so difficult to tell whether we are putting weight on ourselves, our baby, or just have loads of amniotic fluid or massive placentas! I'm sure you will be very body confident by the time you hit Madrid!

PseudoBadger Wed 03-Jul-13 18:12:39

Sorry I've missed loads today - work is insane at the moment and I'm doing at least an hour extra every day, bloody knackered!

Flyer, I have definitely accepted now that I just gain weight when pregnant even if I'm not particularly gluttonous (is that a word?) I know a lot of it is water for me. I'm 5ft 2 and size 8-10 normally and have gained at least 2 stone by now (25 weeks).

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 18:16:26

The little white company do some nice bits, they have a range called the elephant range and it's got some lovely unisex bits. They also have lots of nice bits for boys and girls.

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 18:40:21

pregnancy brain is kicking in... started cooking dinner at 5.30 and then left to pick up DS from the afterschool club, leaving it cooking on the hob... came back after 20min to burnt dinner but luckily not burnt house... domestic goddess FAIL :-(

PseudoBadger Wed 03-Jul-13 18:49:21

Oops! Glad the house is still intact grin

LostMySocks Wed 03-Jul-13 19:10:26

I d

LostMySocks Wed 03-Jul-13 19:12:18

A friend of a friend tripped while pregnant and got taken to a central London A&E. They refused to discharge her until someone brought in her notes so they could add details about her fall.
I still don't carry them but do take when I'm on an overnight trip

Soupqueen Wed 03-Jul-13 19:12:55

Catching up on today's chat, I'm now worried about waters leaking. sad

My knickers have definitely been damp the last few days, how do I know whether it's anything to worry about?

JellyCurls Wed 03-Jul-13 19:21:20

Soup I have same worries. I seem to be constantly sniffing my pants blush to see if its wee but its def not, so for moment I am putting it down to sweat or discharge. How glamourous is this pregnancy malarkey! Will mention to MW next week when I see her.

ananikifo Wed 03-Jul-13 19:36:58

soupqueenand jellycurls me too so it must be normal, I hope?

Soupqueen Wed 03-Jul-13 19:57:33

That's reassuring, thanks! I don't see the midwife for 3 weeks which feels like ages!

Natalieand Wed 03-Jul-13 20:00:05

Me too to all those with damp knickers, thinks its just alot of discharge xxx

Shootingstarsandcomets Wed 03-Jul-13 20:06:41

I don't think you need to be worried its quite rare really. You'll know if its amnio fluid- with me there was a lot, not just damp knickers but soaked through jeans too and down my legs- sorry if tmi! Also it has a funny sweet sort of smell not like wee at all. Normal discharge in pregnancy is runnier and more of it than normal so don't worry I'm pretty sure you'd know if it was fluid.

Me too with slightly damp knickers, I presumed it was because it was hot and sweaty today. How glamorous.

It is interesting that a lot of us shorter people have put on a lot of weight. My nan and sister both put on 4st with each baby which I. Thought sounded far too much for me as I eat a very healthy pretty much vegan diet, but it seems I am on my way. I got a bit down about putting on 5lb in the last 6 days flyer. Gne from 7st 3lb last summer to 7st 6 at conception to 9st 4 now. A lot is bump, but it has gone to my chin, bum, thighs, boobs etc too pretty much everywhere really. The face I am not happy about. I think as long as I am not being really greedy and eating rubbish with no nutritional value I. Have to assume it is ok and right for my body.

My boss wanted me to say when I am starting maternity leave today rather than waiting until I have my Mat1 form on Friday so she can LAN if I will be there to cover year 6 residential trip (not actually going caving/absailing etc, probably looking after any stragglers left at school). As I will have a rest over the summer holidays, I have gone for 38 weeks to get as much money as possible. So my last day will be 4th October which seems AGES. DH was surprised as I have been going on about how much I hate being there, now wondering if I made the wrong choice, but It is easier to leave earlier than stay longer than I say.

Just back from the chiropractor. They have a special cushion for me to to lay on my front. It was very relaxing. The hole in the sand probably feels similar. Ahh smile

Sorry lots of spelling mistakes and full stops in random places - on the iPad.

Shirehobbit Wed 03-Jul-13 20:30:43

I really miss lying on my front - very jealous of special cushions and beach-hole plans wink

I am staying well clear of the scales! I had a bit of a mare with the sizing of the Tiffany Rose dresses for the weddings as they are dual sizes (10-12 and 12-14 etc). Pre-pregnancy, I could be anything from a 10-14, dependant on make/style. So the first one I won on ebay was a 12-14, and though it'll do for one of the weddings, it is a bit too big, so the next one I bid on was 10-12. It is absolutely gorgeous, but too small around the boobs sad
I'm going to try a bit of DIY adjustment next week - I think if I make two small incisions under the arms, I can get enough extra give to get a better fit. Then I can hem in some little darts of matching material. It'll either be a genius move or a disaster....

TheCatIsUpTheDuff Wed 03-Jul-13 21:09:42

I braved the scales, and I've put on 16lb so far (24+4). I was a stone over to start with, thanks to honeymoon and Christmas, so I feel huge. MoN, it's a good job I don't know where you live, or those toffee crisps would be SO unsafe!

Thanks for the chest of drawers link, Smitten. I've got the smaller version of that, and it hasn't stood up to sheets and towels very well, so as much as I love the look of it, I need something sturdier.

My lovely auntie has got a nearly-new moses basket and she's going to make a new lining for me. I asked her not to do pink, because it's REALLY not me, but she says I'll just have to get used to it! It'll be special because she made it, but can't I have anything how I want it? The baby isn't going to have an opinion!

Sounds ambitious shire, good luck. Apprentice with a chic ice for me nom, nom.

Oh and glad the house is OK clapham

Shirehobbit Wed 03-Jul-13 21:26:03

Yes, I suspect the result is more likely to be on the disaster side of the coin jelly
But I've nothing to lose in trying grin

The cat is up the duff, is that the small hemnes from ikea that you have that isn't very sturdy? I think I remember someone posting a link to the bigger hemnes. That is what we were planning to get for the babies room. Perhaps should choose something else...

We are getting new carpets on Friday and Saturday. Then can finally buy all the things I have been looking at!

Haylebop12 Wed 03-Jul-13 21:48:52

Another chatty day ladies!!

Glad your house is ok clapham I leave the hob in all the time even when not pregnant!

I too am trying to avoid baby blue and babyish looking stuff! I've had some nice sleep suits from debenhams. Especially the jasper conran stuff as it has junior j written in it and baby will be baby Joyce so technically junior Joyce! I seem to have gone for lots of navy, red etc.

Everyone who's has talked about labour is so right. Yes it's painful but if you have a focus then it makes it manageable. The only way I can describe the actual birth part is a stinging that goes immediately the head is out.

MrsO27 Wed 03-Jul-13 22:00:48

Someone mentioned that Scandinavian/Nordic shops do tend to stock different and brighter patterns. I came across this one yesterday after one of the posts on our facebook page led me to do some browsing (and buying!) www.northlighthomestore.com/Childrens_Clothing_s/1846.htm

Haylebop12 Wed 03-Jul-13 22:02:08

Ooh I knew there was something else...

Can't remember who was worried about buying something newborn but concerned it said up to 7lb.

Dd was 7lb 6oz and was in early baby stuff for couple weeks, even though she was 56cm. They're smaller then you think!

MrsO27 Wed 03-Jul-13 22:03:07

Oh, and weight gain....my scales are out of service. Best thing you can do is put them away in my opinion!

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 22:05:29

thanks all! I've also managed to scrub my favourite saucepan back to its original state so feeling better but I still scared myself. Hayley glad I'm not the only one!

shire good luck with your ambitious project!

watching Dates now and so happy I'm not in the dating game anymore... looks so tiring and mainly disappointing!

MrsO27 Wed 03-Jul-13 22:06:58

One more post - there is this site for baby clothes too. Some of the styles are not my cup of tea, but certainly nice and bright www.lindex.com/eu/kids/littlephant/

PseudoBadger Wed 03-Jul-13 22:09:29

I know NordicKids has been mentioned above, also www.yellowlolly.com is nice

Natalieand Wed 03-Jul-13 22:11:44

clapham your post reminded of something terrible I some with the job, the top of my cooker is glass and it glows red when hot (electric) I put my wedding cake box on there with the cake inside it and I accidentally turnt a hob on not the main oven and set the cake box on fire whoops lol

I'm boring and brought lots of pale pink for dd and have lots of pale blue for this bump, I do have other colours too but sometimes I think a softer colour can look nicer when they are freshly born so I've also brought some neutral Winnie the Pooh stuff for him.

I think the reason I have only gained 9.5lbs is cos I am already rediculously over weight as someone else says the bigger u are the less u gain during pregnancy as the general consensus. So don't panic yourself about it, sorry to u ladies who live abroad and your health care providers are giving u a hard time about it!

Natalieand Wed 03-Jul-13 22:13:13

Oooops don't u just love apples auto correct

I meant to put i done with the hob not i some with the job

TheCatIsUpTheDuff Wed 03-Jul-13 22:19:48

Orangeblossom - yes, it's the 3-drawer Hemnes I've got. The bottoms of the drawers are thin plywood stuff and only attached by sitting in thin grooves, if that makes sense, so they're falling out without the drawers being particularly full. I'm really disappointed, I think it's a lovely looking piece of furniture, and tougher ones seem to be loads more expensive.

Natalieand Wed 03-Jul-13 22:33:48

We only have a cheap chest of drawers for dd as it was all we could afford at the time nd ours kept falling through all the time even with just vests and pyjamas so dh put a small nail underneath the plywood where it goes in the grooves and now nothing ever falls out and is atchly a nice chest of drawers for the money we paid xx

char1eston Wed 03-Jul-13 22:45:07

xuntitledx not sure I anyone got back to you about the fb group but if you pm me your name, I can add you (will have to make you my friend first)

Ah. Thanks, I will have proper look inside before we buy it.

Flyer747 Wed 03-Jul-13 23:29:25

Good Luck with project dress alteration shire. I'm terrible at sewing, my godmother had to do my gcse textiles as I couldn't sew for love nor money, why I took the subject is beyond me!

Clapham I'm going to watch that dates on catch up, it will bring back memories of my dating ( yes I did Internet) had some right tragic dates and met a fair few weirdos but I look back and laugh at it now. Honestly some dates were that bad I seriously contemplated trying to escape out of the toilet windows in the bar or restaurant, haha gringrin

claphammama Wed 03-Jul-13 23:51:26

oh no Natalie!! does it mean you didn't have your cake for the wedding?

flyer would love to hear some of your stories! Bet you could write a book! :-) if you are catching up on channel 4, I really recommend the programme "why am I still single". I found it really touching and it was very sweet and thoughtful.

Natalieand Thu 04-Jul-13 07:07:43

shire is wearing the dress bra-less an option as sometimes that can give u a little extra room too?

clapham fortunately it was a couple of days after the wedding so most people had already had some of the cake lol

I feel like I'm falling apart today, headache, siatica, bump ache, probly cos I had a busy day yesterday we moved dd's room round and had a general clear out of old tat.

Has everyone on here got the heat wave in their area that's predicted for like the next week? I'm dreading it and usually I'm a sun worshiper!

Warlin Thu 04-Jul-13 08:46:34

Soup on the wet pants front, my midwife said that if you are getting increased discharge (which is normal at this stage) there can be fluid that comes away with it so it can look like amniotic fluid but it's not. So try not to worry. That's what I'm doing anyway and I have the same problem.

I was off work there for 2 weeks holiday and when I came back in, several people said to me "oh, your bump has really dropped...". I know myself it is quite low but comments like that do make me worry!

Smitten1981 Thu 04-Jul-13 09:19:08

OMG I had some hideous internet dates. One was going really well until I noticed he had a terrible limp and he got really drunk and said "I shouldn't really drink as it interferes with my medication", the other one talked about the girlfriend who had dumped him 6 years ago for the entire date!!!!

Turns out I was sitting opposite my future DH at work for the entire time during my dating woes (he had a girlfriend then though), I needn't have bothered with Match.com in the end.

PseudoBadger Thu 04-Jul-13 09:41:02

I read that as 'he was terribly limp' grin

I am eating a lot of nutella on toast i'm sure thats not the healthiest option but yummy!

Willow still very active today I have my 28 week midwife appointment in the afternoon not sure what happens other than getting blood taken and the usual but i will update how it goes smile

Natalieand Thu 04-Jul-13 09:50:30

Probly have bump measured too falcon and feel baby's position blood pressure urine listen to heart beat :-)

I have never been on an Internet dating site my dh was friends with the boy next door but 1 but we never spoke but added each other on msn (it was cool back then lol) and got to no each other he always used to ask me to meet up and I always used to make excuses one day I ran out of excuses and never looked back been together 6 years now and married for nearly 2 years with dc2 on the way :-)
how did everyone else meet their dh/dp/df? I love hearing stories like that it :-)

I'm absolutely starving today! What can I eat first?

Flyer747 Thu 04-Jul-13 09:52:12

Smitten haha, your dates sound as amusing as mine. One kept profusely sweating, one had a dodgy eye, one had this horrendous really thick gold chain around his neck, and generally most looked naff all like their profile pictures, deceivers grin although I met Dunc my DP on there, I didn't rate match either....I met dunc on mysinglefriend and he was date number 1 off the site.

I'm one of the damp knicker crew too, I've now taken to wearing panty liners.

Flyer747 Thu 04-Jul-13 10:00:12

Natalie I too love hearing how people met their other halves.

I wasn't going to go out with Dunc as he isn't my usual type. However after a series of failed dates and a few failed relationships with my normal type I thought why not, and as they say the rest is history.... On date 3 I remember him getting nervous and asking me "Will you be my girlfriend" haha, I felt like I was back at school (I was 31, he was 33) that was 3 years ago, bless him! smile

Was just skim reading to catch up and was confused about the tone of your post flyer - internet meeting with partner and damp knickers grin.

I met my DP off tinterweb - not a dating site though, one of the old MSN chat rooms! My sister and I would try to entice men to sing daft songs for us on webcam, DP was one of them! Came down to London to meet him a week or so later - ending up staying for 4 days, and then accidentally taking his phone back home with me when I went home blush. 10 years later......

Flyer747 Thu 04-Jul-13 10:16:46

Bowl gringrinwink

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Thu 04-Jul-13 10:19:08

Arrrgggh - backache here today (think I over did it on yesterday's dog walk) also feeling horribly guilty for using steroid cream on my eczema but it is driving me insane...the itch is so intense I'm close to ripping my skin to shreds..keep fantasising about digging a fork into it..

Lovely to hear everyone's stories as to how they met their partner/husband. I met Mr Hairy when I was on a conservation holiday and the accommodation was his sport club's cottage. He was there for the weekend doing his hobby (as usual) and a spot of decorating.

As soon as I saw him bravely painting the skirting boards in the grotty men's loos I knew he was the man for me...

I tracked him down after the holiday and we arranged to meet up. However, on our first date it transpired that he had no memory of me whatsoever and thought he was meeting up with someone else! There's me - head over heels and thinking I've met my soul mate - and I obviously made zero impact on him!!!

I met Desperate Dan when I was volunteering at a drop in for asylum seekers.

I was given the job of going through his disclosure forms when he came to volunteer with us. I was 7mths pregnant with Linah at the time and was going through a strange phase where I was toying with Islam so I was wearing a hijab and a bloody awful big baggy kaftan but despite rhis he says he was instantly attracted to me.

I liked him too but I knew that he was volunteering as part of his recovery from heroin addiction and I had enough on my plate trying to get out of the abusive relationship I was in and being heavily pregnant. Henever actually came out and said anything because he was so shy but everyone knew as he followed me around all the time until one day when Linah was 3 months old his friiend grabbed my phone and said " This is ridiculous, David is mad about you so I'm putting his number in your phone".

Natalieand Thu 04-Jul-13 10:38:33

bridget try not to be too concerned over the steroid cream, I've had lots of steroid ear drops since BFP and doctor says they are all relatively safe as you are not actually ingesting them in tablet form so such a rediculously small amount ever enters the blood stream x

I met dh when I missed my train to work. I went to southampton to work from scotland. I was wearing trainers with my suit to make sure i made the train and still missed it! so i ended up halfway between the house i lived in and work. I walked past 20 shops at least before i walked into the one he managed where i asked where my bank was...45 mins later I went to work.

one week later i moved back to scotland thinking nothing of the handsome guy who took my number to offer me a job lol and a week after that he called me to ask me out for a date, I had to inform him i was over 500 miles away! We ended up talking everyday for hours and a month later i went to visit him for the weekend. When i was getting on the bus to go home he was in tears and asked me to move in with him! A few weeks later i did then 4 months after that we got engaged and 3 months after that we were married!!

There were a few strange things about me meeting him that i think was fate.

We nearly crossed paths many times before I used to be in the forces and lived in the town he used to work in and we also worked in the same company at different times.

Now i know this sounds crazy but before i moved to southampton I have a voice repeatedly telling me to move there every night it was bizarre i had no reason to move there I had never lived there before.

Obviously I missed the train and I choose to go into his shop its not like i could see him in it.

I definitely think we were meant to be we have been married 6 years in December, he is my soulmate truly blush

Ahh Falcon - that's so lovely! Much nicer story for the grandkids than my seedy internet meet, lol!

claphammama Thu 04-Jul-13 11:04:55

pregnancy brain - day number 2... this time forgot my phone at home and feel totally lost without it at work... I suppose it's still better than almost setting the house on fire! And another sleepless night - this pregnancy insomnia is killing me slowly... feeling zombi like but have to perk up later as have parents drinks tonight.

bridget hope you feel better soon. This itching must be driving you crazy

Love reading your "how I met my man" stories! (*MoN*... you are like an onion! How many layers do you have? what else do you have up your sleeve? quite a story! :-)

I met DP through work - I was his PR contact and was telling him what to say and what not to say (this has never changed by the way grin) We actually worked together for 3 years before we got together but were both in serious long term relationships so I had no idea DP was in love until we were both single. And then it all came out with a vengeance... he was not my type at all and pretty much the exact opposite of my ex so I wasn't sure how I felt about it but then things happened and the rest is history! He left the company about 6 months later which was good - don't think I could do the living together / working together thing...

BridgetandtheHairyBrigands Thu 04-Jul-13 11:05:42

Thanks Natalie - that's reassuring. The cream is prescribed by my doctor but sometimes it's hard not to worry.

It'll be a real relief when I'm finally not pregnant or breast-feeding and can take whatever medicines I need without stressing about their impact on little one.

MoN - are you still in contact with Dan's friend? Does know the crucial role he played? One of my younger cousins had a very troubled life and died in uncertain circumstances in her twenties and I really like the fact she was one of the people that egged me on to hunt down Mr Hairy - it's like she has an on-going impact somehow.

claphammama Thu 04-Jul-13 11:11:24

OMG I also forgot my hair brush... I honestly give up. Hair all over the place and knotted after shower, didn't even bother to dry it this morning. Was just planning to brush it before a big meeting but now I guess I will be going like this... I honestly meant it about not brushing my hair. Thanks God I'm having another boy...

Flyer747 Thu 04-Jul-13 11:29:00

Clapham I am currently watching dates on 4od I didn't realise it was a series I thought it was a real life documentary. Watched the first one and it's good that Mia is a bitch though.

Falcon what a lovely story it's like a true sliding doors.

MoN everytime you talk about DP i chuckle and think of desperate dan grin

Bridget I'm sure Mr Hairy was totally honoured when you showed up and not the person he thought you were.

I'm mega skint this month, spent way too much recently and as I'm not flying my wage is about £700 a month lighter...Off on holiday next week with no holiday spends, DP has kindly left me all his useless groupon shit and old clothes to flog on eBay to raise cash, such a joy hmm. I'm really going to struggle on smp.

Love reading the meeting stories, makes me feel all mushy inside!

First met DP when I worked as an LSA at his school when i was studying for my MA. I was based in his dept although only remember being in his class once and I was in a relationship. Two years later I went back to the same school to do my second teaching placement and despite teaching in a different dept, plonked myself in my old workroom in his dept. Broke up from the relationship I was in and soon after developed the biggest crush ever on DP blush
He spoke about being a best man at his friends wedding and I decided in my head that would be his date. Then I found out it was abroad- first holiday together was after 5 months grin and we moved in together a couple of months later. Mushy feeling again!! blush blush

Flyer is that normal/legal that you take a pay cut even though you are not able to fly? hmm

Smitten1981 Thu 04-Jul-13 12:15:27

Clapham Your story sounds really like mine and DH's, except the other way around.

We sat opposite each other at work for two years and I was totally in love with him, but he had a girlfriend of nine years that he lived with, so I thought I had no chance.

We gradually started spending loads of time together so I told him how I felt and he said that he had no idea I felt that way at all. Anyway, he left his gf for me, we got married a year and a half later and now the baby is on the way!

He got promoted to my boss literally two weeks after we got together when no one at work knew about our relationship - ha ha!

It was an agonising two years for me though thinking he was amazing and not being brave enough to say anything. I'm so glad I did!

Warlin Thu 04-Jul-13 12:17:14

Love reading these stories and love bowls confusion over flyer's post smile

I met Dh when he interviewed me for a job!! He was working at a consulting firm and he and another guy did a first interview with me...I then had a second interview...and then a third (which was over a casual dinner) and then I found out that it was actually an IT post they had (and I'm not in IT). He just wanted to get to know me! We were both instantly drawn to eachother and he just made me laugh so much that the rest is history! That was almost 7 years ago, we have been married for 3.

I also went on a dodgy internet date..the guy picked me up ( I wondered why he was driving and not in a taxi), said he had booked a restaurant at a local hotel and when we got there he checked in to his "double room"...hello...on a first date!! Turned out to be a total wierdo so needless to stay he stayed there alone smile

Flyer747 Thu 04-Jul-13 12:31:30

I love hearing the stories, keep them coming.
Unfortunately feminist it is normal and legal. Part of my salary is made up of allowances (they are paid for food and drink, phone calls etc) whilst I'm downroute with work. As I cannot fly because of health and safety and insurance reasons when up duffed then I'm obviously not entitled to my allowances. For a stop over like a Cape Town, Los Angeles and Johannesburg (my regular routes) I'd get about £200 and the stop over is 2 nights, as if I would spend that on food in 2 nights. So most crew bring their allowances home (a big chunk anyway) hence my wage now being quite a bit lower and mega skint. Long explanation there hey! grin

PseudoBadger Thu 04-Jul-13 12:42:38

Flyer I'm pretty certain they can't reduce/amend your pay if you've been given alternative duties due to pregnancy. Is that usual for your company?

claphammama Thu 04-Jul-13 12:51:21

wow smitten - do you still report to your DH at work?? :-) How did it work out at the end? Amazing he left his gf after so many years and then things progressed so quickly with you - obviously you are the one! grin

feminist another lovely story grin

flyer this is a big chunk of your salary... and I must say I am very surprised that a company like yours doesn't pay more than just SMP... although I guess most of their staff are women of child bearing age so they are probably protecting themselves? I really thought they would pay better though...

So now I am not only unbrushed but also covered in beetroot juice as the canteen juicer attacked me... today is clearly not my day

PseudoBadger Thu 04-Jul-13 12:57:29

There is a case (British Airways vs Moore & Botterill [2000]) that went to the Employment Appeal Tribunal. I will send you a link. Basically they should have been given the same terms and conditions including allowances OR have been suspended on full pay.

PseudoBadger Thu 04-Jul-13 12:58:55
Flyer747 Thu 04-Jul-13 13:01:16

Yes pseudo it's normal for them. They are tax free and are in theory supposed to be used entirely for food etc whilst on company time so not classed as part of my salary, however my job the salary is pretty poor (for London) so most crew do have to bring home allowances in order to live. I hope no one on here works for hm customs and revenue otherwise I'm toast shock I'm living on my basic salary plus a small ground placement allowance.
It's my own fault because I am spending like I was before I got pregnant. I just need to cut back and be realistic.
I really cannot slate them because they are a fantastic employer and after all these years I still love putting my uniform on and going to work it makes me feel very proud to work for them, I sound totally sad hey!grin but I'm still skint haha...

PseudoBadger Thu 04-Jul-13 13:02:38

Also taken from here

"Ms Moore and Ms Botterill both became pregnant during the course of their employment as pursers with British Airways. Under their terms and conditions of employment they could no longer be employed on flying duties after their 16th week of pregnancy. They therefore accepted alternative work in ground posts. Although their basic pay remained the same, they lost out on flying allowances.

They argued, successfully, that when suspended by reason of pregnancy, section 67(2) of the Employment Rights Act 1996 requires an employer to offer suitable alternative employment with terms and conditions no less favourable than those they would be entitled to under their normal work. The fact that some of the flying allowances represented expenses was not relevant. "We are quite satisfied that it was not necessary, for the purpose of determining liability, for the Tribunal to embark on a breakdown of the various allowances...It is enough...that taken as a whole a considerable part of those allowances represented profit"."

PseudoBadger Thu 04-Jul-13 13:04:31

The fact that some of the flying allowances represented expenses was not relevant. "We are quite satisfied that it was not necessary, for the purpose of determining liability, for the Tribunal to embark on a breakdown of the various allowances...It is enough...that taken as a whole a considerable part of those allowances represented profit

Employers are still pissing all over women's rights sad

Flyer747 Thu 04-Jul-13 13:17:02

Wow interesting read....I wonder after that how BA pay their pregnant ladies? It is something that I could raise with my union rep and see what his feedback is, I will get in touch with him.

Clapham I know the maternity pay is pretty dire isn't it...6 weeks 90% then smp. I'm lucky in that I have no debt and DP has his own business so we are comfortable and he is very kind and generous but that's not the point I like having my own financial security. I just hate the thought of not being independent financially, I've always been able to look after myself in that department and it's something that I consider very important for me anyway. I'm sure my priorities will change once our baby comes along.