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5 month baby and pregnant

(46 Posts)
lucyw19 Sun 21-Oct-07 20:04:10

has anyone been in this position?
Help!!

eandh Sun 21-Oct-07 20:11:28

NEMO on here has 3 children closed together her two yougest dd's are around 12/13months apart.

Mum from preschool has almost 3 year old, nearly one year old and expecting again in december (one brave lady!!)

CarGirl Sun 21-Oct-07 20:13:09

got a 14 month and 2 day gap it was fine

Nbg Sun 21-Oct-07 20:14:00

Hiya

My ds was 5 months when I found out I was expecting again.
I'm now 34 weeks!

I also have a dd who is 4.

Massive massive shock and tbh I think its only now I'm coming round to it
lol

TheMadScaryHouse Sun 21-Oct-07 20:14:42

I have just under a 15 month gap and it is great, first three months were hard work, but It is getting better day by day

lucyw19 Sun 21-Oct-07 20:20:20

Did any of you have to think about it??
Im only 19 =[
Im finding it so hard to decide, im worried i wont be able to give my 5 month old my full attention!!
x

TheMadScaryHouse Sun 21-Oct-07 20:22:49

It was a no brainer for me I am afriad. I am older 33 and had suffered miscarriages in the past - so although not planned, very wanted smile

Nbg Sun 21-Oct-07 20:26:14

I had to think about it alot.
I wasnt in the right place mentally to have another baby or pregnancy but at the same time I didnt think that abortion was the way for me.
I couldnt have forgiven myself and I think that would have had a worse effect.

Its been hard this pregnancy but ds has had all the attention he would have had if I had not been pg.

CarGirl Sun 21-Oct-07 20:28:41

mine was planned had a 5.5 year gap between the first two and wanted to get on with having my family, that was the minimum gap I felt I could cope with and fell pregnant straight away!

I've now gt a 10.5yo, 5, 4 and 2 year old - the 5 & 4 year old are just lovely together it's really easy in many ways - just accept you have young children build your life around them for a bit. Once they're both walking and talking they amuse each other for hours - they have an inbuilt playdate, they share really really well - virtually no jealousy issues etc.

lucyw19 Sun 21-Oct-07 20:44:16

i feel like that, that mayb im not ready mentally!! But like u, not sure if i could have an abortion!!
My partner really wants me to have it, i just think to logically, for example, money!! Living arrangments, and im at college doing a two yr course!!
wb xx

CarGirl Sun 21-Oct-07 20:47:16

being at college may be your sanity - you will be able to find childcare, it will be fine, you will cope and dc will have each other you can get the baby years done and dusted (if you decide to not have more) quite quickly.

There are lots of positives, do you have supportive family?

lucyw19 Sun 21-Oct-07 20:52:34

But will i be able to do it while pregnant?
I guess it may fall on summer holidays!!
i do have a supportive family but as im young and my mum worrys like anything, i feel bad!!!

I no i need to think of myself but i just feel stuck!!
xwb

I have 22month old gap between dd1 and 2. Dd2 now 6 weeks old and i'm already trying for another. We want one more and not too leave a big gap. I think you will be fine. Your not the first to have done it and it'll be lovely that they'll be into similar things

notanotherone Mon 22-Oct-07 18:43:21

My dd was 4 months when found out I was pregnant again, and felt really upset, depressed and angry. We had wanted another but not so very soon. I thought very long and hard about what to do. We eventually decided to carry on, and due next week. There are positives and negatives. Money, housing, jobs etc all such an issue. But I have had abortion previously, when I knew it was absolutely the right thing to do,and have never regretted it, this time it didn't feel the right thing to do. I am relying on other MNetters who have done it and come through the other side smiling...whatever you decide will be the right decision.

PeachyFleshCrawlingWithBugs Mon 22-Oct-07 18:49:45

same age as our two eldest- and we have another one, and yet another on the way!

So it cant have out us off too much, can it?

I'm doing the last year of my degree whilst pg and tbh I am shattered- but its motivation for me to get out and about and do things that aren't child related, if you see what I mean? So I think its a good thing.

I didnt find the 2 baby thing too ahrd tbh, a sling (so yu can use a single buggy as longa s possible) was excellent, and so was a rocking baby chair so I could occupy one and give time to the other. But at least you skip the otehr issues- such as lego everywhere with an older child and trying to keep LO's safe.

Ultimately the decision is yurs and you must go with your heart, of course. Good luck whatever you choose X

lucyw19 Fri 26-Oct-07 09:27:43

I just dont no how to decide. Someones said to me if u havent decided then tbh u probably want it, but i say yeh i will then i think nooo i cant do it again not yet!!!

How can i make this decision =[

help!!
x

GardenAngel4 Fri 26-Oct-07 14:11:42

Hi lucy, I have a 6 month old and have just found out I'm pregnant which was planned but didn't think we woudl be successful so soon.

I can't help thinking if you don't go ahead you will regret it later in life. Maybe try and imagine ending it, sitting in the waiting room etc going through with it, how you feel might help you make a decision.

I could say that there is never a right time to have another - I run my own business, we're about to knock seven bells out of our house with building works, I probably won't be able to work with two under 2 for a while etc etc, but I'm in my late 30s and time is not on our side so we've gone for it.

Like one of the ladies said you will find childcare and you will finish your course. You'll be knackered, but it sounds like your partner will support you. 19 is young but think how fabulous it'll be in 18 years time when you're only in your 30s. Believe me it's much more knackering at 35 than 19!

I wish you all the very best. smile

lucyw19 Fri 26-Oct-07 17:32:25

Thank you for ur kind words. I dont like to think about not having ti really but i just dont want to make the wrong decison.

I spoke to my tutor and she said i can still carry on with the course and ill be finished off slightly early, so thats a bonus!

im just worried about money and going mad lol!!
x

scorpio1 Fri 26-Oct-07 17:35:08

lucy-you will be fine

im 22 and pg with baby number 3-since having the first i have done three a-levels and have nearly finished my degree-it is completley possible to have it all! You will find childcare, money will be fine-you will get more child benefit, help from college, etc.

lucyw19 Fri 26-Oct-07 17:38:39

did you get help with ur a -levels?
x

scorpio1 Fri 26-Oct-07 17:40:40

I got £30 p/w through the ALG fund.

Becasue you are under 20 you can apply to Care to learn to pay your childcare.

I didnt get much help at a-level beause dp earns well, IYSWIM. At degree level you can get grants.

It really helped that my dp was very supportive, as were the college.

starshaker Fri 26-Oct-07 17:43:30

my friend has 4 kids all under 4. the shortes gap she has is 7 months (baby was prem obviously) and she loves it

glaskham Fri 26-Oct-07 17:50:33

i have a 15mth gap with my two.....my son hit the terrible two's just after my daughter was born, but i tell you what i wouldn't change it for a thing, they play so well together!! my daughter is now 18mths......i was 20 when i had her, and had my son already at that piont, so kinda your age....its hard till you get used to it, but well worth it!!!.....my advise for when the new baby is born is to make all guests that come to see the baby make their own brews and do a job round the house for you before they get a cuddle!!!!

bamboozled Fri 26-Oct-07 17:55:31

I have 16 months between my 2 (found out that I was pregnant again when dd was 7 months old) and although it was a bit of a shock at the time, it has turned out to be the best thing I ever did. They play fantastically well together, encourage each other to eat and are best friends, (they are now 5 and 6. I won' pretend when it all kicks off, there isn't merry hell in the house, but as soon as I tell off one, they hold hands and gang up on me, saying i'm mean to the other one - regardless that she started it in the first place! The first year was sweaty, no other way to describe it, but if I was doing it again, I'd definately go for as small a gap as possible. Good Luck!

lucyw19 Mon 29-Oct-07 09:46:01

Im off to the hospital today!!! Ive got to go with a full bladder and a urine sample, but i thought i was only talking to someone!!
Does anyone knows what hapenes??
x

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