Mumsnet Talk

Bowlfullofjelly I'm hoping to have a home birth this time - nothing wrong with the care I received last time and managed a drug free labour despite DS being back to back, but I panicked with the transfer to hospital so would like to avoid that if at all possible! Plus DH doesn't drive so it would be a case of getting a taxi unless it was daytime and my dad (who would be minding DS) could take us but don't want to wake DS in the night for a hospital trip

See I have contemplated a home birth Rockchick,but I had a complicated delivery last time (induction, pressured into epidural, heartbeat dropped, rushed to theatre, back to room, then not monitored properly, mad panic when they realised I was 10cm's dilated, failed forceps and eventually ventouse) - but I know that the likelihood is had i pushed for a low intervention birth none of this probably would have happened!

But my biggest concern is - what about the mess !

i know for definate a home birth would be out of the question for me. I had an EMCS last oct after a failed induction at 40+14 so with it being such a short period of time i think they will suggest an ELCS.. i would love to try for a VBAC and if i go into labour naturally then i'll push for one, only concern is baby didnt even engage last time as she was too big (10lb 12oz!) so would be worried if i did go for a VBAC it be a waste of time and would end up having an EMCS instead of a nice calm planned one... dilemna!

10lb 12 ! Wowzers! I am very impressed!

I'm sure there is a thread about VBAC, maybe talk to those ladies for some advice?

wow cherry thats amazing. my DS was 8lb 1 and had trouble getting him out because he got stuck.
Im another one who would like a homebirth but due to underactive thyroid and having strep b last time. im not sure I can.I had really good care during labour last time but the post natal ward was just awful awful awful.
I will be looking for anywhere I might be able to have a water birth I think, and hoping this time is less complicated so I dont have to stay in.

I will be giving birth at the hospital closest to hubby's work which is 15 miles from our home (2 miles from his work), our closest hosp is 7-8 ,miles away but we r allowed t choose between the two. I had dd1 there and depending upon my confirmed due date I will have the same midwife for all of my care too

Have still got such bad diorrhea, not sure if this is a good or bad thing? Too scared to google it lol i rang the pharmacy yesterday and they said nothing I can do without a prescription so have do s at 5.30 today but the cramping/ burning sensation I was having in my upper abdomen has gone now so that's something

My sister returned from her 10 day holiday in Mexico today and I'm dying to tell her cos I didn't no I was pregnant when she went away but at the same time I don't wanna mp the gun and get carried away with telling ppl. Xx

Im dreading to think of the size of this one esp if they meant to get bigger! When DD was born and they told me the weight i was glad she came out the sunroof as pre-pregnany im size 8, 5ft6 and looked as if i was having multiples by 30 weeks! Not to mention the stretch marks- mauled by a tiger more like it lol
Even though im scared pf pushing out a baby 10lb+ i do feel by having a CS last time i was ripped apart from any achievement associated with birth, i didnt even get to the pushing stage/get skin to skin straight away/be first to hold her etc... I was shaking from all the meds, could barely keep my eyes open, she was taken away cleaned, wrapped in a towel before i even saw her/knew she was a girl! She was then showed to me for about 2.5 seconds then got whisked away to get weighed and cord cut by OH, didnt get to see any of it i couldnt hold her till i was in recovery, fortunately she took to my breast straight away and we had a lovely mummy baby moment.. i know it was all neccessary but cant help but feel my ideal birthing moment was stripped away!

wow, big rant! have chatted to vbac ladies too- they mostly have had vbacs after a few yrs healing and small babies in my eyes so am going to have a lengthy chat with my midwife in due course!

Dd1 was 8lb 8oz at 39+5 I had the same midwife deliver her that I had for every appt and she was absolutely amazing. Like a god lol. I had an epidural last time but I think I want to try and manage without one this time. I must be mad as I don't have a good pain thresh hold. I won't be allowed a home birth as I'm high risk cos I had a high blood pressure and I'm overweight but tbh even if I was allowed one I'm not sure if I would want one anyway xx

could they possibly induce you early cherry or monitor size of baby to let that be a guide? sorry if a silly question. I ended up with ventouse with DS and crash team were called in for him so DH nearly fainted. also felt like lovely birth memories had been taken from me but all worth it when I got to hold him and he was absolutely fine. Just hoping all goes a bit smoother this time . Did anyone watxh one born every minute the other night. was in tears for poor lady who had a panic attack and ended up having a GA for her CS. she was so upset because her DH hadnt seen the birth. Dont know why I do it to myself am always in tears by the end of that programme.

pink i cried! i know how scary it is going for a cs and the tissues came out!
had baby monitored last time as i was always measuring 3 wks ahead, got seen by the head of the dept on my due date and was told baby wasnt overly large about 8lb... how wrong was he! Dont think id like to be induced again/or theyd let me considering what happened last time! Being in hosp for a week in labour is no fun! Looks like im going to be trying the pinapple raspberry leaf curry walking sex routine again!

My first labour sounds so straightforward after reading your stories.

Dd was born at 37.5 after 12 hour natural labour. No intervention just g&a. 4 stitches for a graze. She was 7lb 6.

I feel very lucky

Don't reckon it'll be the same this time. I'm now about 2-3 stone overweight and not as active as my previous birth.

Think we are scaring all of the first time mums

One thing that made me really angry with my first though is that they don't prepare you for if things don't go to plan. You are advised to write your lovely birth plan, blah blah, but don't actually discuss what happens when things don't go to plan, which ends up making you feel ripped off like a few people have mentioned. When the emergency cord was pulled when baby's heart rate dropped I was in floods of tears, thinking I was going to lose him. Took the lovely Doctor ages to calm me down and get me to believe that this happens all the time, nothing to panic about!

Am also going to try for as natural labour as possible this time, but will go for a birth centre attached to a hospital rather than at home I think.

no bowlfullofjelly what's there to be scared about?! its just a bit of light pushing and moaning while your partner fans you and feeds you grapes then a tiny little baby just slips out without you even really noticing. you suddenly look all made up and glamorous and then go off home for nights full of sleep and a life with a constantly peaceful smiling baby.
I'm not naive about these things you know.............

sorry first timers! a better story for you- my sister has 4, all born on or a few days before their due dates, under 2hrs labour for every one, no stitches, intervention or anything! I always tell her shes a lucky bitch thats why she has so many

Hi Roofio - sorry, didn't mean to be patronising! Was just thinking back to before I had DS, and I avoided everyone's birth stories, OBEM, even refused to watch the video of someone giving birth in ante-natal class - ignorance was bliss for me

oops sorry
also have positive stories one of my freinds has two children. both normal lovely homebirths 4-5 hours of contractions and gorgeous babies arrived. Then able to settle down in her own bed with all her supportive family around her. Not jealous at all...
Think key is to try and stay as laid back as possible about birth plan. All Im writing this time is I want to know whats going on, not just everythings fine, even if it is

What helped me was knowing i read up about everything, if i understood it then i wasnt scared of it if u get what i mean...
i read up on everything... apart from cs!

oh no "bowlfullofjelly* I didn't think you were being patronizing at all. I was just trying to be hilarious and probably not being as usual Haha!! I'm very glad to hear all you 2nd time mums stories!! x

My dd was born on her due date and weighed 8lb15oz. She was slightly blue but pinked up quickly

My ds1 was 10 days early and weighed 9lb13oz (thank god he was early!). Born happy after a 4 hour labour

My ds2 was 5 days early and weighed 9lb4oz and had to be resuscitated due to him not breathing (very scary) after a 2hour labour

If this one is quicker, I shall have it in the car!

I am very exited but very nervous too

I have only watched OBEM once... And it freaked me out a little bit (that was before we started TTC so it can't have scared me that much!)

I think you may have a good point there cherrycherry41, reading up on everything kind of prepares you mentally for it all!

Speaking of which, does anyone have any pregnancy books they'd recommend for first timers?

DH is keen not to buy anything that might jinx our pregnancy, but surely a book about pregnancy itself would be ok?! Just not going to buy those they look so comfortable I'd wear them now awful maternity jeans just yet.

I recommend the What to Expect app. That's not even an book, so its less of a jinx. I don't think a book is jinxing it, as there are things to know in there that you need to know before you get to the 12 week mark. I got the "your pregnancy bible" and thought it was a very good reference.

Had a nightmare last night that the booking appt was horrific - the MW said she would only do it over the phone because she knew I had already miscarried, but that i had to wait for the 12 week scan anyway. Thinking positively, I shall use this nightmare as evidence that my mental health is being affected and therefore need an early scan.

Thanks Santa. I have the app (hidden away in a folder on my phone so no one will see it!), and I quite enjoy the daily updates.

I am glad you said the pregnancy bible! That's the one that keeps catching my eye and it seems to have good reviews. After assuring DH that it covers early pregnancy too, I ordered it for delivery tomorrow.

Eh, I hate bad dreams. They really seem to affect your day don't they?! Sorry to hear you had a bad one. Good idea to use it as an excuse for an early scan though... I hope you have some happier dreams about a little healthy baby tonight.

Afternoon ladies. Well I've outgrown my bra already (getting that attractive overspill!) so Ive ordered 3 from Littlewoods in varying sizes and hoping one of them is suitable! Had to get a crop top type bra for sleeping in as boobs were waking me up with pain when I turned over in bed. I'm a size 14 with FF boobage. Shame, 'cos like the 'free swinging' sensation I get taking my bra off at night . I'm not feeling particularly tired and not nauseous at all so....

...I did ANOTHER test this morning . I have a couple of CB digi's in the draw so rude not to. Needless to say it was 'Pregnant 3+ weeks' (apparently the test doesn't go more than 3 weeks). I'll be 7 weeks next Tuesday so I should hope so! Stupid doing it i know but also reasurring that my hormone levels are high. I deserve a Hooya though!

My H2B is acting all funny as of last night. I don't know why. Maybe the pressure is setting in? He's being quiet and that's always a sign he's got something playing on his mind. He's having a lads night tonight (2 of whom know about bubba) so hopefully he'll snap out of it and have a good night. I shall be home alone, flicking through the channels looking for something trashy to watch!

Anyone else's first time dads feeling the pressure?

I went out an bought a CB digi at lunchtime , so even more stupid! And surprisingly yes, I am also Pregnant 3+ weeks. But have reasoned that I would have spent far on more that £12.99 on wine on a normal Friday night, so therefore is fine to have wasted that money .

My 2nd time OH seems to have forgotten I'm even pregnant - he is nearly prestige (??) on Call of Duty now, and so that seems to all his poor brain can cope with at the moment. He keeps asking me whats wrong if I'm being a bitch a bit off, so have advised that the answer to that question for the next 9 months will be 'I'm tired, I feel nauseous, and I'm worried' and so to stop asking me.

OK really am a bitch - as soon as I posted that I got an email from OH saying he would do the housework while I am at cinema with my friend tonight. Feel bad now!!