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TTC 6 mths+ GRADS THREAD

(994 Posts)

Afternoon.

I thought I'd start a Grads thread for those of us previously on the TTC 6 mths+ thread. I've been lurking on the ttc thread recently to see how everyone is getting on (having only very recently qualified to move off it!) and a few people were saying what a nice idea it would be if there was a grads thread so we don't lose each other.

Anyway, would be lovely to hear from other lovely ladies that were on that thread - or even if you were never on the ttc thread but had a sticky time of it getting your bfp then come and settle down with a decaf cuppa for a chat.

<lays out some freshly baked goodies to tempt people in>

CritterPants Sat 09-Nov-13 14:04:34

Quick question for eleth - my friends are asking me about a baby shower (I know, I know… but they're all American and horrified at the idea of not having one, which is really nice) and I was looking at the bum genius nappies you mentioned. What do I need to register for with them? They seem to have different kinds…. also what do you do with the dirty ones? Do you have a special bucket for them? I literally have no idea what I'm doing! flowers

Eletheomel Sat 09-Nov-13 21:39:26

Just back from celebrating my mums 80th birthday (I was a late baby for her too :-)

Quick response to critter re bumgenius.

The ones I have are bumgenius v3 as those were the current ones out at the time and the ones I tried and liked (I think they're onto v4 now).

I have a nappy pail and I dry pail them (so I have a bucket with a good lid that keeps all the smells in, in the bucket is a net back that secures round the rims, I throw the 'wee' nappies straight in the bucket (taking out the inserts, and the poo nappies get rinsed in water first (you don't need to, but I do) and then are thrown in the bucket).

Once the bucket gets 2/3 - 3/4 full, I put on a wash (I take out the net back which holds all the minging nappies and throw it into the machine (so you don't need to touch the soiled nappies).

The bucket I got looks like this: www.nappyeverafter.co.uk/nappy-bucket-with-lid-232-p.asp

And the mesh bags for the bucket are like this: www.fill-your-pants.com/nappy-bucket/mesh-nappy-bags.html

I also have a wet bag I got in my trial pack from the council, I keep the wet bag upstairs for when I change him down there and my nappy pail is in my downstairs toilet - also use the wet bag when out and about (to store minging nappies).

Loads of them about, mine is a pretty boring plain green design, but you can get them like this: www.fill-your-pants.com/nappy-bucket/blueberry-wet-bag.html

Hope this helps

p.s. baby shower? sounds very scary :-D

CritterPants Sun 10-Nov-13 12:41:47

Thanks a million Eleth. That's really helpful! My friend was asking me if I needed something called a 'diaper genie' and I was totally confused... Some sort of nappy pail. This is super helpful!

Happy birthday to your mum, how lovely. I hope she had an awesome party! I bet she gets a lot of pleasure out of your little boys!

Buzzybee123 Sun 10-Nov-13 21:18:15

doll I hope you are feeling better and enjoying your time with mini doll

critter I have just ordered a kind of 'diaper genie' half price at Kiddicare, they are usually for disposable ones, I'n not going out into the communal hallway to get rid of pooey nappies in the middle of the night, don't want them hanging round either a simple lidded bucket will do the same thing i'm sure,

ele thanks for that info, I have added it to my list of things to get smile

CritterPants Tue 19-Nov-13 02:12:55

buzzy I will look into the diaper genie thing. I'm sure we will probably at the least be using disposables for the first month and overnight, and I don't fancy stinky nappies in the main bin.

We have new neighbours downstairs who have a 5 month old baby. I'm really happy as it suggests they will be understanding when ours squawks! And that I can leave the buggy in the stairwell without them minding too much. What luck.

sar that was a stunning picture of you on t'other place. You look absolutely glowing.

Back from a week-long work trip and feeling very busy but very happy, and my back feels better, too - probably from a week of basically sitting in a hotel conference room and not having to walk to and from work.

doll how are you doing? I hope you're a little better.

Waves to everyone else.

Buzzybee123 Tue 19-Nov-13 16:25:42

critter I am not sure how much I will use it but don't like the idea of the flat smelling, I worry I would lock myself out the flat in the middle of the night if I just put them down the rubbish shute, if I had known about the bucket thing from ele I might have ordered 2 of those, . MIL is getting us a months supply of disposable nappies, she works part time at a supermarket and they 20% off day tomorrow smile

I plan to put minibee on my head when she cries to piss off the neighbours from hell upstairs, payback is a bitch wink you'll be able to go on playdates with your new neighbours.

Are your parents coming over for the birth??

CritterPants Wed 20-Nov-13 11:51:27

Buzz my parents are planning to come and stay in a hotel for a few days when the baby first arrives, then go back for a couple of weeks. Then my mum is going to come out again when the baby is two weeks old and stay with us for three weeks to help out. We've planned it like that because friends have told us that the first two weeks are ok because you're getting to know your baby and you run on adrenaline but after two weeks you start to crash and really want help.

Is Barry's mum going to help? I bet she must be really excited. When do you get to go on mat leave? And how are you feeling? Three quarters of the way there now!

Buzzybee123 Wed 20-Nov-13 21:24:34

critter sounds like a good plan smile both of them are getting excited, FIL is finding stools for me to put my feet up and MIL won't let me do the dishes when I go over for dinner grin

I don't go on mat leave until xmas, cannot come soon enough, I am hoping that my placenta moves otherwise its a c section for me, they also said they would induce me on my due date, I don't really mind, I will be well and truly ready to meet her then, is this your parents first grand child

PrincessChick Thu 21-Nov-13 04:23:25

Bleary eyed waves all smile

Can't do a big catch up now but my main news is that we have new beautiful floors, mini princess has another tooth and is now eating (!)

So nearly there for so many of you, very, very exciting!

I've also created a new home for ALL ten plussers in off the beaten track. Link on the TTCers thread smile

Must. Try. To. Sleep! Mini princess is worrying the sheets and Mr P thrashing around. They are impossible some nights!

doll I hope you are ok. I've been worrying about you recently. Especially as you weren't very well after tiny dolls appearance smile thanks

Ginestas Thu 21-Nov-13 08:52:14

Morning all! Have been meaning to post on here for agggges.

princess hurrah for the new Fred. Will pop over there. And yay for mini P having a tooth and eating. Doesn't time fly?!

I too am a bit worried about doll. If you're reading, hope you are ok Doll and just too busy with tiny Doll to post.

buzzy how lovely that the in laws are so excited. I think ours are too. They've offered to come down and help, but I've said not until feeding is established - couldn't imagine sitting round with my boobs out in front of FIL, esp as MIL didn't BF. Hope you are still feeling a bit better. Count down those days! We can then meet up when you're on ML smile

critter our plans are fairly similar to yours, in that for the first few weeks, the only person allowed to stay at ours is my mum -I'll need her help when Mr G goes back to work- and everyone else can come for the day/stay in a hotel until the baby is one or two months old. Tbh they wouldn't get any sleep either, as our house is tiny and the spare room is also where the baby's stuff is! How long do you have left at work now?

ele hope your little man is still doing well.

Waves to art, teu and everyone else.

sar I agree that you look stunning in the pic in t'other place. I love seeing pics of you ladies with bumps. Makes me so happy to see 10+er success. Not long for us now eh? Can't believe DD is only just over 3 weeks away.

Speaking of which, the ginster is being naughty and is currently breech. I have a scan tomorrow to see if she's still breech and if so they'll book a c section for near the DD. The MW has said there's little I can do to change the position and that babies do what they want. Mr G thinks it's funny that the baby is already being wilful and points out where she must get that from, ahem. Anyway, I'm disappointed that my lovely MW led centre birth won't happen and am shitting myself about the op, but am resigned if it's the only way to get her out. Am also scared about going into labour early and it becoming a EMCS and DH not getting there in time. Meh.

The scan last week was actually a growth scan and she was estimated to be about 6lb10 already at 35+4! Interestingly at an antenatal check this monday, the bump was measuring as though it hasn't grown for 2 weeks and the MW had to check I didn't need an emergency growth scan. Just shows how inaccurate the stupid tape measure thing is. Plus none of even my mat clothes fit, so the bump has def grown!

ele I know you had the uterine blood flow thing I had. Did they tell you too that they would induce you at 41 weeks, even though it had resolved itself? Seems a bit odd to me.. Although we won't get that far if the baby remains breech.

Anyway hope you are all well and enjoying time with your bundles, or your last few weeks at work. I'm loving mat leave at the mo ( during the first week), although don't have so many plans ie cake dates next week, so may get a bit bored... Nah who am I kidding!

Eletheomel Thu 21-Nov-13 10:20:23

Hello everyone,

Brief post hear as Hamish is in his rocking chair but none too happy about it :-)

Been kept busy recently with a tooth appearing (well, just the tip of one, but it made my little boy very grumpy) and the associated loss of sleep.

We've got a week or so until we start weaning - so not looking forward to it - a milk only diet is so much easier - ah well, he has to start solids at some point, time to dig out the old shower curtain for the floor....

Big waves to doll not had time to check out the ttc thread for a while so not sure if you've posted there, but really hope you and baby doll are doing okay and (like gin says) you're just busy being mum to a new baby.

buzzy so good to hear from you, how are you keeping? Are you feeling any better? So crap to have so many pregnancy ailments when it takes so much effort to get diffed - still the end is in sight (when are you due again? I forget, is it Jan time?) Bet you're counting the day to maternity leave starts (I know I would be!)

gin there was no mention of induction at 41 weeks just because of the uterine arterial flow symptoms. I opted for an early induction (weird I know) just because of my past history with pre-eclampsia, the uterine flow issues early on and my age (was worried I'd have placental problems late on and so chickened waiting for a natural birth) so I raised it with my consultant and noted that I watned to get to 40 weeks and then schedule an induction if no move, and they were happy to support that. So, I suppose since I mentioned it, they didn't need to? Sounds odd though, I wasn't led to believe that there was any risk if the flow issues were resolved, although I suppose they're maybe erring on the side of caution in case of late placental problems?

I'd ask them why they're suggesting induction at 41 weeks and ask about the research their basing this recommendation on so you can have a read up on it yourself.

Re breech - are you going to try a ecv before a section or just go for a section? I was looking at ECV when my monkey went breach at week 36, but I wasn't sure about it, but I know how you feel about a section - hopefully your little monkey is just taking its time and will get head down soon!

need to go - hamish is shouting at me!

akuabadoll Thu 21-Nov-13 11:43:49

Hi, thanks for your thoughts and sorry for the worries. I must admit I have had a very unpleasant time and have not been able to put the experience into words nor to relate to any of the 'normal' post-birth stuff. We are all, essentially, fine though. We are still in a hotel and the shine has somewhat gone off being here, luckily we should be heading home at the weekend. During this last week, it has become apparent that Tiny Doll has colic which adds a new grim element to the mix. I don't feel myself at all sad

gin I'm surprised that you would be booked for a c-section so far from your DD, has no one suggested trying to turn her? Or perhaps you don't wish to try? I know that not everyone would. I do consider your midwife's 'there's nothing you can do' to be an opinion rather than fact. While it didn't help in the end, Tiny Doll was OP at 40+4 and I did a lot of spinning babies stuff, either it worked or he turned himself by 41 weeks.

akuabadoll Thu 21-Nov-13 11:47:10

Oh cross-post ele with the same question to gin

Eletheomel Thu 21-Nov-13 16:54:53

HI doll great to hear from you but so sorry you're feeling a bit off.

Also poor tiny doll - how horrible that he has colic - it is hard work (my eldest suffered a lot with it, however we could manage to get him to stop crying but it required dancing/jogging on the spot while singing to him for hours at a time (fairly helped me lose the pregnancy weight gain though - every cloud and all that).

Hamish suffered a lot with trapped wind too, but it never seemed to upset him so much that he'd cry about it, I did find though that from week 8, it started to get better (whilst at week 6 it seemed to get worse!) and by three months it did end (not overnight, but close enough)

Dealing with that while you're not yourself though and with little doll too is far from ideal, hopefully once you get home you'll start to feel a bit more you.

Sending you all the recovery wishes I can!

Buzzybee123 Thu 21-Nov-13 18:00:15

doll glad you are ok, sorry you've had a tough time, no surprise you don't feel yourself, you've been through so much and managed so well with everything, hopefully things will settle when you get home

ele I am not due until the end of Jan, feels like a age away still, yes 19 working days left till mat leave, although could finish a week earlier, Its lovely to hear about your boys smile oh and I have bought those items you suggested to critter

gin I was under the impression that they induce from around 39 weeks, I'm concerned about the epidural, the thought of someone sticking a big needle in my back makes me wince, I don't want to freak you out but I did read a sad story about a woman who had ECV, it put me off the idea.

mellow Thinking of you

princess thanks for setting up the other thread, hope you got some sleep

Eletheomel Fri 22-Nov-13 08:19:03

buzzy I think I read the same story about ECV which put me off (that, and the fact my sister was breech and she was turned twice, but each time turned back!) I wasn't sure about it at all, although my friend had an ECV which was successful and she didn't say it was that sore, just a bit uncomfortable. It's so hard to make decisions about things you've never experienced before.

You don't need an epidural if you're induced, I've had two inductions both without an epidural (although I confess I was asking for one the first time, however I was fully dilated by then so could just start pushing) and the second one without any pain relief at all (no machismo, just didn't need it)

I share your aversion to the epidural, I had to argue with the midwife and the consultant first time round in the labour room that I didn't want one, as they both tried to heavy hand me into it with scare stories how I wouldn't cope and how hard it would be to put in later...

But the fear of a needle in the spine was way more terrifying for me (I'm a wuss!)

The main reason I ended up asking for one was the patronising crap I got from the midwives in my first birth who kept telling me I wasn't having contractions only twinges (weren't they shocked when they checked before taking me to surgery to realise that all those 'twinges' had gotten me to 10cm....)

My second birth (without the complications of pre-eclampsia which I had first time round) is evidence that you can do it without.

Glad you found the nappy stuff useful (although i'm not on commission for those sites - honest!)

A new baby in the new year - I'm really quite jealous (hamish is so big now, seems a world away from a fragile newborn...)

Eletheomel Fri 22-Nov-13 10:12:19

Quick 'self-publicity' post from me :-)

I've set up a temporary photo album on picasa with some pics from hamish from bump to now :-)

I'll delete it in a few weeks, but hopefully this link will work (let me know if it doesn't).

https://plus.google.com/photos/106078220894797959027/albums/5949020499101869681

Ginestas Fri 22-Nov-13 10:57:06

I can't get the link 2 work ele but that's prob cos I'm on my I phone! Can't wait to see the pics. smile I'm planning to make a photo book for the baby, with the first pic being Mr G in a surgical hat for ET. I thought it would be a nice way of explaining the ivf.

doll I'm so pleased you and tiny doll are ok. Sounds like you've had a shitty time though. Must be extra hard when you aren't in the country you live in and are also a long way from friends and family support. Hope you are enjoying some new born cuddles.

buzzy oddly the epidural needle doesn't bother me, which is odd as I'm a wuss about everything. I think you get a local first? Are they talking about inducing you at 39 weeks due to the ivf?

Thanks for all the support re turning the baby. I would've refused the ECV due to the risk to the baby, but as it turns out I don't need it, as the ginster has been a good girl and turned all on her own, wohoo! The scan this morning was super cute - we could see her face and little fingers.

Induction is booked for 41 weeks due to the blood flow thing. I did quiz them and they were adamant that it's safest for the baby. Tbh, I will probably just want the baby out by then. It's booked for the 21st Dec, so we may just make it out for Xmas. If they do induce me, I'm def having an epidural...

Eletheomel Fri 22-Nov-13 11:11:43
Buzzybee123 Fri 22-Nov-13 11:19:21

ele I thought the epidural was to also help numb the area before incision confused I haven't really looked into it to be honest, love the link but it says I need your permission, you can set up private albums then invite people through their emails.

gin I think the cs would be around 39 weeks the induction would be on my dd due to age and ivf confused I shall ask him next time what evidence they have for this, at least with ivf you actually know your dd, I think due to my placenta position they wouldn't want to risk me going into labour

Ginestas Fri 22-Nov-13 11:21:12

That worked! OMG he's sooo gorgeous! What a little sweetie. And you look so happy and glowy in the pics, even the hospital ones. Ahhh, I love baby pics smile

Buzzybee123 Fri 22-Nov-13 11:23:10

oooh love the photos, he is a gorgeous boy smile

Ginestas Fri 22-Nov-13 11:25:07

X post buzz, ah yes, there was a lady in our hospital class who has a low lying placenta and had been told she would def need a CS before 40 weeks. I think hers was totally blocking the cervix. I'm all for quizzing them re evidence. The MW had originally mentioned to us induction due to ivf and knowing exact dates, but the consultant said this wasn't necessary. Confusing eh? Btw, did you watch the rugby on Sat?!

Eletheomel Fri 22-Nov-13 11:29:23

incision? Ah, did you mean section buzzy I may have misread it as you saying an epidural was required for induction (damn right you'd need one for incision though, can you imagine being awake for that???) lol :-D

I see my technical skills are far less than even I thought they were (and I didn't rate them that highly).

I have given permission to someone how asked, I'm basically going to let anyone who asks for permission to get access to it, as I can delete it later, so not worried - figured it was easier than doing similar on facebook (which I don't use) but maybe not...

I've never understood why IVF babies need induced before a certain time - how does that work? What are the extra risks? They certainly didn't tell me of any potential impact on birth when we had our (failed) cycle.

The Royal College of Gynaecologists released a paper this year which suggested that for women over 40, if induction was routinely done at 40 weeks that a number of full-term still born babies could be saved. There is a remote risk of full-term still born at any age (sadly) but it increases at age 40 - current thinking seems to be that the placenta for women aged 40 declines a few weeks faster than women of a younger (early thirties) age, and so an earlier induction could help prevent this.

I read the paper and discussed it with my consultant before I decided. The risks are still very very small, and the midwifes I mentioned it too, all seeemed appalled that I was being offered induction because of my age!

But the fear got me, and I went for it.

You can view the paper here: http://www.rcog.org.uk/files/rcog-corp/1.2.13%20SIP34%20IOL.pdf

I'm not saying the evidence is compelling, but having been through an induction before I was less scared of it this time and was terrified of not having a live baby at the end of it.

PrincessChick Fri 22-Nov-13 17:28:33

Doll glad to hear you are ok! but so sorry you have been at the mercy of the shitty stick again sad Hope you all get home and settled and the colic eases. Lots of well wishes to you and family Doll xxx

Ele you and Hamish are both very gorgeous! What lovely, lovely photos. Thanks for sharing smile We too are weaning in a very informal fashion because Mini Princess is only 22 weeks but has been grabbing our food and getting it into her gob very successfully, with laser beam precision for 2 weeks. As she's been sitting unaided for weeks we've decided to start blw. It's sooooo messy but rewarded with lots of laughs and amazement that our tiny Neanderthal is eating and getting fistfuls of food!

Gin the ginster has turned! And will likely have an awesome xmas birthday like myself. What an absolutely gorgeous idea your book is. I've still been pondering how I "pretty up" how Mr P and me met for the baby book blush how do you tell a child that you met in a seedy nightclub and it went from there? Quickly? Mumbled? I love the part of the story where a wise old very drunk weirdo man told us we would get married and we'd only been talking at the bar for 10 mins.

Teu I hope you are feeling ok? I had a terribly blue morning made even worse by a shit-splosion just as I was trying to leave the house to catch a bus to sanity. Poo up the front, back and side of the nappy and 2 wipes left in the house confused after a bath and a phone call to mr p I spent the afternoon dunking marshmallows in hot chocolate and eating cheese on toast and talking to the nice lady in our local coffee shop. She ended up pouring her heart out to me and I felt much better for the company and some fresh air and a little retail therapy. Baby Teu is such a beauty, you must be so proud xxx

buzzy I don't have experience of induction but from friends, as with ele! they recommend a slow drip drip of syntocin and many swear by epidural! It's such a personal thing. I think most women I've spoken to just wanted more info, so maybe canvas some threads here and read up on the options so you're well armed smile

I've been at my mums and was spoilt rotten with cups of tea, food, extra hands and time in the shower on my own - a rare treat!! It's been a bit of a come down being at home on my own especially as my friends didn't show at baby group yesterday and my other friends cancelled our farm visit today due to illness. I am cheered by this afternoon and not long til mr p gets home. I always feel so guilty because mini princess is such a good baby unless she's unwell or teething and today she's been a dream, which means I should cope better than I do. But I'm fine now and everything feels back under control.

Big waves and happy weekends xxxx

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